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Going back to work? - Page 2

post #21 of 46

how is everyone doing? Anyone back at work yet? Pumping?

 

I am in SERIOUS limbo. I have filed paperwork to extend until January and that's the current plan. FMLA runs out mid-November. Basically although the district protects my contract, it doesn't protect my exact job at my school. So that leaves six weeks where he could put someone else in that position. The person who was my predecessor still works at our school as a specials teacher. I heard the principal got permission to put him back in my position, although whether as a sub or permanently I don't know.

I am trying to let go and just enjoy being home, but right now my only certain paths would be a. go back in November when FMLA is up or b. decide to take the rest of the year

I'm sad and angry that there is talk of replacing me and not holding my job for six weeks after FMLA after all I have put into that school.

post #22 of 46
Thread Starter 

Boots - Ugh, that stinks that your principal might replace you - I hope that is not the case, especially in light of the fact that you're only asking for 6 more weeks.  I would be through the roof if that happened to me.  Are you able to communicate more openly with your principal your desire to stay in your current position and try to work that out and head off any unwanted changes in advance, or does it not work that way?  

 

On the other hand, if you really don't want to go back, perhaps this is a 'sign' to reconsider your work situation altogether.  It sounds rough not having any sick time.  Maybe you can swing staying at home and then look for a new position come spring that would start next August?  I'm speaking from no knowledge of the job market where you're at though... I do know that being at home during that first year, especially with your first, is really nice.  When I had my first son, I went back to work for a few months when he was 11 weeks old, but only 30 hours per week and then when he was 5 months old - I quit my job (my boss knew all of this in advance and was just incredibly supportive) and we moved to China, where I stayed home full time until he was 11 months old - it was really nice.  I was still nice and busy learning Chinese, but I had a ton of flexibility to be with my son.  I think it's worth trying to pull off some extra time off :).  You're going to work a lot in this life - but these first months with your baby will fly by and be gone before you know it!  Having babies puts life into perspective, eh?

 

AFM, I am back to work full steam and it's going really well. I'm exhausted, which I expected.  I am also the last in my house to get a head cold that's been going around - so I'm not feeling so hot presently - but the job's good.  I'm glad I made the switch (just started a new job) and I'm just starting to get into the full swing now in my 3rd week.  I'm pumping twice a day - at 10am and 2pm, thereabouts.  I nurse my baby at 7am right before I leave and then again at about 5:45pm when I get home.  So far, I'm pumping more than enough - I actually am freezing 3-5 ounces every day - which is fine as I might have a business trip in the nearish future.  I'm finding I can work through my pumping sessions just fine.  It's just annoying to have to stop what I'm doing and set up to pump, but so far, I think it's totally worth it.  

 

It is sort of insane working with 3 kids.  We're busy as heck.  It's pretty nonstop and I'm having to be brutal about time management to fit it all in.  I plan ahead for every little thing and I'm still going going going.  I know that sounds miserable, but it's actually going ok. We're not in a routine yet, and still working out a lot of kinks - like how to get dinner on the table without losing our minds.  ;) But we're getting there.  

 

I'm also trying very hard to take care of myself.  I got highlights in my hair and I feel a little prettier.  I'm also either biking to work (4 miles each way) or walking to the shuttle (1 mile plus each way) to get to work and getting a little exercise.  I still have a billion pounds to lose, but I know with patience and persistence, I'll lose it.  I'm eating too much frozen yogurt, but hey, a girl's gotta live.

 

I miss the kids, but treasure every moment I have with them (except when I want to wring their little sweet necks, which is sometimes, if I'm being real :)>.  I also miss my husband - we need to fit a date night in soon.  

 

I just keep reminding myself that this is a period of transition and that things will smooth out.  

 

Anybody else?  

post #23 of 46

I'm back at work-ish.  Classes don't start until the end of November, but I have meetings and such.  I've been bringing the baby to the short meetings (those with just members of my department), but leaving her with DH for longer meetings.  Writing and so on I've been doing at home, which is getting easier now that Piper has decided to take naps during the day.  She takes two 45 minute naps in the morning (sort of at random) and then a long two hour nap in the afternoon, which makes me sooooo happy because I can get stuff done in that period.  Finally.

 

When classes start though we'll have to have a system where I leave Piper with my husband one day a week and then hopefully with my MIL one day a week so I can actually get writing and grading done and lectures written.  I'll also probably have to sacrifice a weekend day when DH can be home so I can go to a coffeeshop to work. 

 

Pumping has been going ok.  I have a Medela harmony manual pump that I'm using until I find out from HR about whether our insurance will cover an electric pump.  I'm surprised with how well it's working... In the morning I usually get 3 oz out of my right side (my left is almost un-pumpable for some reason, so I let Piper deal with that side), which will hold her when I'm away for short meetings or workouts.  I'll have to start adding to my stash though or pumping more efficiently if I'm going to keep up with demand once school starts.  My only class in the winter quarter is Monday evenings, where I'll be away for five or more hours.  I'd anticipate her needing at least 6 oz during that time.  That's a lot of pumping.  eyesroll.gif

post #24 of 46
post #25 of 46

Due to some unfortunate circumstances, I think we'll have to put Piper in daycare two days a week.  I'm really sad because I was hoping to avoid this until she was a year hold and thought we could.  But DH's hours have been increasing at work, he took a coaching job (which is great for him personally, but kind of crappy for our family), and I have a book contract with an end date of March 1.  Suffice it to say, I'm a bit of a stress monkey.  I'm really torn on what the best option is for our family, but I absolutely have to get this project done and I'm finding it impossible to get work done around Piper's nap schedule.  I'm also finding it difficult to manage our random meeting schedule at work -- there's no consistency, so I can't have family on call for particular days.  I had to take Piper in this morning and it was pretty stressful since I have nowhere to put her for her naps and I was nursing in front of my two male colleagues (who are dads, but still) and generally just feeling like our day was completely crazy.  Not to mention schlepping her and my computer and diaper bag across the 1/4 mile or more walk from the parking lot to my building...  Ugh.   It was just a crappy day and it looks like it has forced me into a crappy decision.

 

We're also looking into nanny stuff, so maybe that will work out better.  Blah. 

post #26 of 46

I'm sorry, Lily - that sucks.  I hope you're able to find a good match.  That day sounds super stressful.

post #27 of 46

Lilly, I'm sorry. So tough!  I also found it impossible to try to work and care for a baby at the same time.  While finding care is always really stressful, I bet once you do, you'll all be so much happier.   

post #28 of 46

Lily - I found with my first that making the decision and picking the care giver was the hardest part (and the first week) but after that I was pretty happy with the arrangement.  This time around it was even easier. 

 

I made it through my first day of work today and Gwen was an angel with her nanny.  She did manage to drink all 17 ounces I left her and I only managed to pump 14 ounces (btw I'm gone 12 hours).  I'm hoping that adding in another pumping session tomorrow will solve the issue.  Otherwise I'll be eating bucket loads of oatmeal and drinking mothers tea.  I'm really thankful my job has such a nice mothers room for pumping.  It makes it so much easier.

 

How is everyone else doing?

post #29 of 46

Two and a half more weeks to go...(I return the week after Thanksgiving)

 

I'm going to read this book to prepare myself: http://www.amazon.com/The-Milk-Memos-Business-Babies-/dp/1585425443/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1352389042&sr=8-3&keywords=pumping+diaries

I've heard really good things about it.

post #30 of 46

I am going to start looking for a job to possibly go back to work in January, the whole March thing just doesn't look like it will work out financially. I am sort of torn, I'm excited to get back to working and starting a new job that I will hopefully like, I do have the luxury of being very picky about what I take, and if that means I don't start working right away, it is okay, but I get sort of teary and sad thinking about leaving Quinn. I wish my sister lived closer so I could leave Quinn with her, I would feel so much better knowing I was leaving Quinn with someone who loved her almost as much as I do.

 

Penny, when I read the review for that book I got all teary, I think I am going to get it as well.

 

We're having bottle issues because we were only giving her one every week and a half or so.  Then my mom and B didn't want to give her a bottle because she didn't like it as much and would fuss...I was just like, you guys need to give her the bottle, it is more important for you than it is for me! Then I would end up being the one to give her the bottle. SMH.  Thankfully, she seems to be doing a little better with taking it.  We need to make sure she is comfortable with it before I start working again.

post #31 of 46

Wow, that book looks great.

 

I am so amazed and proud to know all you who are balancing baby and work right now. Truly amazing.

 

I have an interview next week for a weekend gig helping a teaching fellows program select candidates. Will be good for a little dough and to keep the resume updated. It's still SO uncertain whether I will be returning to my school next fall. I still have keys and my classroom isn't cleaned out. I don't think my (sort of former) coworkers are very happy with me. Sigh.

post #32 of 46

I almost committed murder at work today.  The chair of the committee I'm on keeps pushing back our meeting times, so we had a meeting at 11 am (which is smack in the middle of a day I could use for writing, but whatever).  So I get to work, meet with some other colleagues, and around 10:50 I go ahead and pump.  At 11:00 I'm waiting outside his office.  My other colleague and I finally knock, only to have the chair run out cursing about some administrative snafu.  Fine.  20 minutes later he is finally ready to go.  We get to the meeting place, get coffee and get settled.  It's now 11:30.  Ten minutes later he decides he is hungry.   He asks us if we mind if he runs to get something to eat.  We continue working while he gets food, comes back, and eats it.  It's now 11:45 and he has done zero work.  Our meeting ends at 1:00, though it should have ended at 11:45.  I now have half an hour to finish the stuff I have to do in my office and run errands before returning to take the baby so DH can go to work.  Obviously, none of that gets done (except a quick grocery run).  I wish people knew how much new mothers have to get done in the tiny amounts of time they have available.  My entire morning was pretty much shot because this guy couldn't get his act together.  Soooooooo frustrating. 

 

In more exciting news, today was the second day in a row I pumped an actual milk surplus.  She ate 7oz while I was gone and I managed to pump 2 oz before work, 5 oz at work, and 2 oz during her long nap.  Yay for pumping efficiency!

 

Finally, we start interviewing nannies on Sunday.  I have five candidates I really like, three of whom are older and two are younger.  I like the experience of the older ladies and the energy and enthusiasm of the younger.  I think it will primarily come down to personality type and flexibility.  I guess my priorities are someone who is interested in actually interacting with Piper (rather than just sitting around watching TV or whatever) and getting her outside at least once a day.  Having never had a nanny before, I suppose there will be a learning curve.

post #33 of 46

That's so annoying, Lilly.  Good luck on the nanny interviews, though.  Talking to them should give you a lot more clarity. 

post #34 of 46

I say Argggggg!  My pump broke at work yesterday :( and G is gulping down 18oz while I'm away and doesn't really want to nurse when she's awake and with me.  The bright side is she is nursing three times a night in that sleepy baby state.  I'm also having a hard time planning out pumping breaks during the day.  I get the best yield if I pump every 2.5 hours but meeting after meeting keeps cropping up.  So sometimes only an hour has passed and I'm trying to pump again or maybe 3.5 hours go by.

 

Lily - good luck with the nanny interviews! 

post #35 of 46

I submitted my resume to a financial/accounting staffing agency and immediately got a call about an internal audit position with a really good company.  I explained that I was looking more towards going back to work in January of February, but I am set to go in and meet with the recruiter in two weeks just to go over my resume, experience, and what I am looking for. I'm sort of nervous and not sure how ready I am to go to work.  I think I want to wait until February, but at the same time, I don't want to miss out on a great opportunity. I sort of miss working, but I will miss Q more, and I'm really nervous about putting her in child care.

post #36 of 46

This is my last week of leave.  I am having...lots of feelings.  greensad.gif

post #37 of 46

Oh Penny....  hug2.gif

post #38 of 46

So hard Penny.  I have to say, that for me, and a lot of other women I know,  the anticipation of going back to work was far harder and sadder than actually being at work.  Let yourself grieve the lost time with the baby, but I'll keep my fingers crossed that before you know it you'll settle into a routine and it won't seem nearly as bad as you feared. 

post #39 of 46
Quote:
Originally Posted by rebecca10 View Post

So hard Penny.  I have to say, that for me, and a lot of other women I know,  the anticipation of going back to work was far harder and sadder than actually being at work.  Let yourself grieve the lost time with the baby, but I'll keep my fingers crossed that before you know it you'll settle into a routine and it won't seem nearly as bad as you feared. 

 

Yeah, that! I have been back at work for almost a month now (and my girl is 3 months old) and it has not been as sad as I anticipated.  My main feeling is of guilt-- not so much sadness, although I do have moments of longing.  The good thing is that after being out for 2 months I have so much work backlogged that I'm SUPER busy and the days fly by.  I also go home at lunch some days and nurse her, which is great.  I have a friend that just went back to work and brings her son (she works for the state). I'm soooo envious!

post #40 of 46
That's a good point - I'll have plenty to keep me busy when I get there! My mom's going to bring him to the office once a week so I can nurse him during lunch, and I'll be working from home 1-2 days a week so I'll get to see more of his face. And he'll be home, with my husband or my mom, so I don't have to have the added stress of worrying about him with new people or in a new place. I'm very grateful for that.
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