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Mothering › Groups › April 2013 Due Date Club › Discussions › Rude? Or is my pregnancy hormones just getting to me?

Rude? Or is my pregnancy hormones just getting to me?

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

We went out with DH's mom for his birthday dinner a few days ago. Obviously being 8 weeks pregnant, I wasn't going to order a drink, I ordered a lemonade. We haven't told her I'm pregnant, but I'm also not a big drinker as is.

Well, when I ordered the lemonade instead of an alcoholic drink she flat out asked "Are you pregnant?" I told her no. Left it at that. When I went to the bathroom, apparently she started grilling DH if I was pregnant, kept asking him if I was, why I wouldn't drink if I wasn't, blah blah blah.

To me, this is just flat out rude. While I am indeed pregnant, I haven't announced it, and don't think trying to get bullied into an announcement is very polite. Not to mention, isn't it common curtsey NOT to ask someone if they are pregnant? DH said I'm just being hormonal, but it's really rubbing me the wrong way she'd be so frickin pushy about something(and this IS typical MIL behavior on her part, very nosy)

post #2 of 13

Personally, I think it's rude. If you tell her no, she should leave it at that. It's stories like this that make me pray, "God please help me to NOT be THAT MIL some day!!!" *Hugs* I'm sorry she isn't respecting your boundaries and that she is behaving in such a way to your dh. Also sorry that he is seeming to brush off your feelings as just hormones.

post #3 of 13
That is WAY rude! When u announce your pregnancy it should be a happy awesome announcement, that's on YOUR terms! Anyone that would try to take that from you SUCKS! I'm sorry... ((hugs))
post #4 of 13

Oh man. What stinks worse is that she sounds like the type that when you do announce it you'll get the "I KNEW IT" speech! ugh.

post #5 of 13

I agree that she was being rude. When we finally announced with DD we had this girl who was hardly even an acquaintance state how she knew already and blah blah. I was like "Who the Eff are you?" Some people just feel they HAVE to know everything and they have to let everyone know that. It's super frustrating. 

post #6 of 13
Definitely rude! DP's mom (who is actually super sweet, if a little overbearing) asked him if I was pg about two weeks ago after a night when we went to dinner with them and i didn't drink. He said no, too. I was irritated that she came right out and asked- just be patient, you WILL know eventually! We just aren't ready to tell yet, partly because she was so hover-y when I was pg last time...
post #7 of 13

She was rude. He's wrong, you're right. As usual, I'm sure. That's how it is 99.999% of the time at my house, anyway winky.gif

post #8 of 13

Ugh, how rude! Is it even possible to really get along with your in-laws? I'm almost convinced otherwise. 

This circumstance reminds me of why I should be glad that I'm not 21 yet. This seems to be the number one reason people start asking before you're ready to announce. Blah. 

post #9 of 13

What she did seems rude, yes. But maybe she's just excited about the possibility of another grandchild?


My MIL guessed I was pregnant about 2 weeks ago, only 1 week after we found out. Mainly because I said I didn't drink much on my bday, and said I seemed very tired, taking alot of naps.  We still denied it though.  Although she guessed it with my 2nd pregnancy too.


There have been times that I have thought someone was pregnant (usually right LOL), but I wouldn't grill them about it. They need to tell in their own time, in their own way.

post #10 of 13
Thread Starter 

I'm glad I'm not alone in thinking she was rude. I know first of all I'd never ask if someone was pregnant, but if I did and they said no, I'd leave it alone. Especially considering she's a woman(and a heavy set one) you'd think she wouldn't want to touch on that, guess not...

Greenlea, she'd LOVE another grandchild, but she wouldn't be happy about it. After my miscarriage, after her "sorry" she said something about how it's for the best because we shouldn't be having anymore kids.. so yeah.. lol.

post #11 of 13

What a jerk! If someone says they are not pregnant then shut up about it. Maybe they are pregnant but the pregnancy is not going well and they don't want to announce until they get better news or maybe they just don't want to tell you yet. I dislike pushy people. She reminds me of my mother, which is not a compliment. haha

post #12 of 13
Thread Starter 

LOL! She's a piece of work... not even mean, but rude and annoying  :P. 

She's left it alone, but I figure if we go out, I'll order a virgin drink when she's in the bathroom or something to get her off my back. We're not ready to tell, and she's had miscarriages herself, it's something I'd just think would go hand in hand in respecting. 

post #13 of 13

This reminds me of something that happened today. I was talking to my friend, and I said I was about tired of trying to get in touch with the midwives, and was thinking about trying to contact someone from a different center/city, and a different friend was like "Are you pregnant?" I was like, "What?" He said "Why else do women go to the doctor?" *facepalm*

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