Good position for DH to catch the baby « Back to Group Discussions

[Princessjules]

Have any mamas had their DH or someone other than the MW or OB catch their baby? DH wants to catch this time and I as wondering about a few good positions for me... I was thinking on hands and knees or possibly squatting but idk what i would use as support ( and shutter to think of the veiw he would get on hands and knees.. isn't that dumb? lol)... Any ideas or suggestions would be awesome!

[Worldshakerz]

That's hilarious, your comment about hands and knees position. It's funny because I was actually in that position when my daughter was born, and my DH did catch her that way just fine. No one could have convinced me to be in a different position at that point, it was the most comfortable way for me to be...and I was supporting my upper body at the foot of my bed (it was kind of low to the ground). You could also use a birth ball or a chair to support your upper body. The funniest thing about it was actually that my daughter started to come out, but only so her eyes and about half her nose could be seen - and then she opened her eyes. It freaked DH out just a little - lol. But daddy was the first one she saw! 

[hyde]

I'm really counting on my midwife to help with this one.. we also want my husband to catch and she and I talked about where he'd have to be if the birth happens in the tub, but if it's not, I don't know how I'd plan- it seems like positioning in that moment depends on so many things that it's hard to predict.

I really, really want him to have that experience though.. selfishly I'd love to pull her up myself, but in wanting him to be an active part of the birth, how cool must that be for a dad?

[JuicyPakwan]

My dh caught with me in H&K position and it worked out great.  I know it sounds a bit gross but at the time I was pushing all I cared about was not pooping on the baby I could have cared less about his view of the birth.  I didn't poop on her but I was panicked about it at the time.

[JuicyPakwan]

I wanted to add dh was ambivalent about it before the birth but was so glad he did it was a wonderful experience for him/us.

[bethiana]

With our last baby DH caught while I was on hands & knees & gripping onto the edge of the bathtub. Having a hard surface to grab onto was essential for me . . . I felt really grounded. In the moment it was the last thing on my mind but thinking back yeah what a view point for him lol.
 

[Princessjules]

Originally Posted by Worldshakerz 

That's hilarious, your comment about hands and knees position. It's funny because I was actually in that position when my daughter was born, and my DH did catch her that way just fine. No one could have convinced me to be in a different position at that point, it was the most comfortable way for me to be...and I was supporting my upper body at the foot of my bed (it was kind of low to the ground). You could also use a birth ball or a chair to support your upper body. The funniest thing about it was actually that my daughter started to come out, but only so her eyes and about half her nose could be seen - and then she opened her eyes. It freaked DH out just a little - lol. But daddy was the first one she saw! 

I was thinking I probably wouldn't care much at the time. In the heat of the moment you just do what feels best or right... That is so cool that your DH is the first person your DD saw! I could totally see how that would be a little freaky though, I wonder if babies know to be worried about stuff getting in their eyes? Idk... that's what I think of when I think of babies opening their eyes  during birth... I'm very strange though...

Hyde - I know what you mean! I was so excited when DH said he wanted to catch! I used the birth stool last time and he was behind me so he didn't get to even see DS come out, and he really wants to this time. He doesn't want to cut the cord though lol I would think catching the babe would be way grosser but whatever lol I just hope he doesn't "chicken out" at the last minute.

My dad caught 3 of my brothers and that was so neat to see that! My dad loved being so involved in their births.

It looks like H&K is the most popular. Honestly that sounds like the most comfortable. I was also planning on asking my MW on my next visit, if I make it that far lol But I did tell her that DH wanted to catch so she already knows and is expecting that so hopefully she will have a suggestion or two as well. 

[Carson]

With ds1 I was in the Lithotomy position in the tub pushing for awhile. Then I turned over to h&k and DH remarked, I can see why obs like that position, this is a lot harder. But our MW showed him how to position himself to catch and it was all good. I think you just need to comfortably and efficiently deliver and your mw can direct him where to be.

It was probably one of the highlights of his life, and the joy of him doing that definitely was worth me not doing it, IYKWIM? I cut the cord, and that was kinda fun.

[katt]

Well, I caught my DS.  DH didn't want too, even though i offered.  I really wanted the first person to touch/hold the baby to be family.  I was on knees and leaning on the edge of the tub.

I think you should just labor/deliver in whatever position you like and make DH accommodate you.  :)

[Princessjules]

Originally Posted by Carson 
 our MW showed him how to position himself to catch and it was all good. I think you just need to comfortably and efficiently deliver and your mw can direct him where to be.

That is what I was thinking would happen... I am just trying to figure out what to expect... I honestly haven't had much time to think about how I want to do anything here at home. We were at the MW's house last time so this is my first "our home" birth...

[MIrandaM]

Worldshakerz, I had the same thing happen! I was in the tub on hands and knees, dh was at my side and I was leaning against a step in the tub- Mw told him to come look, baby was born up to his mouth and dh saw his eyes. He didn't tell me about it until the baby was five days old, I guess he needed time to process it all. That said, that's very much his personality.

Even in the throws of labor it did occur to me that the view would be pretty graphic. To be honest I also felt relieved that he was at my side and not behind me because I was pushing hard and could feel my bottom really bulging - couldn't tell if I was actually having a bm or not and didn't care since it was the midwives down there and they've seen it all, but I would have been very self conscious if dh had been behind me the whole time. Not self conscious enough to change positions but I think it's best not to have anything like that on your mind at the time.

[MIrandaM]

Double posting, dangers of posting on cellphone!

[Lucy Alden]

My husband has caught two of our four kiddos. I didn't even occur to me to consider what position would be good for him. I figure I'm the one doing the hard work and everyone else can work around me! Your midwife should be able to direct and help your DH. Seriously, I wouldn't even let it enter my thoughts. Get in the position that is most comfortable for YOU.

[Princessjules]

Originally Posted by Lucy Alden 

My husband has caught two of our four kiddos. I didn't even occur to me to consider what position would be good for him. I figure I'm the one doing the hard work and everyone else can work around me! Your midwife should be able to direct and help your DH. Seriously, I wouldn't even let it enter my thoughts. Get in the position that is most comfortable for YOU.

I am not really worried or anything I am just trying to get an idea of a position I want to be in for labor. Just kind of as a frame of reference, I guess. I know it will depend on what is most comfortable for me at the time and my MW already told me that she would help DH get in position and help him know what to do, so I am not worried, just wondering what other moms did. I know it's pretty much about my (relative) comfort at that point lol