Im 4 days pp. I tore as well, one in the perineum and one right below the urethra. The recovery hasnt been too bad. I stayed off my feet for the first day, and started moving around day 2. I lost a lot of blood pp so the biggest thing I was facing the first 2 days was dizziness and weakness from the blood lost and horrible horrible sweats. I had some pretty strong pp cramps every time I nursed but that has pretty much passed by now. Today, I am feeling like I took a rough ride on one of my horses. Slightly sore and bruised feeling and some pubic bone tenderness. I dont really have much more than a slight twinge of pain when I pee, which is much better than I was expecting.
Finally ventured out of the house today somewhere other than the ped's office. I went for a short walk with my mom around the block. My butt is sore from just that small walk... guess thats a sign I need to do it more!
BFing has been going ok.... a bit rough at first. She really really did a number on my nipples before my milk came in and I wasnt getting her latched right. I corrected her latch yesterday morning and it really brought my milk in. It was sooo bad on Thursday and Friday that I was biting down on my shoulder to keep from flinching and pulling back each time she latched and tried to bring down my milk. Its getting easier by the day. Might start some pumping next week. I have a bit of an oversupply and constantly dripping and could use excess for my 1 year old who is recovering from a cold right now.
Emotionally Im up and down. Im mostly still riding the new baby high. We had our pp home visit from our doctor and he said my first reaction right after I delivered the baby was "I did it! I did it! I did it! There is a baby on me!" very loudly. Im still feeling so accomplished of something so many people told me I shouldn't or couldn't do. There is a huge vbac ban everywhere within 100 miles and its nearly impossible to find any midwife willing to do a vbac. We had just moved back here to be closer to our family, so I had to find a new obgyn before I decided on a home birth, or knew that option existed. When I said I was going to do a home vbac, he got irate and told me I had a "death wish for myself and my baby". I wasnt expecting him to agree with my decision, but I was expecting at least a little professionalism. This happened so many times through my pregnancy and I am so proud of myself for following through and doing it, especially after I had planned a home birth with my son, but due to him having a major intestinal blockage, down syndrome, severe polyhrdramnios, and double footling breech i had to give up on a home birth and vaginal birth early in the pregnancy.
Then there are times I break down and cry because Im not sure how Im going to handle a 1 year old and newborn! Especially at 4 am and I still havent had any sleep yet because its been either one or the other needing fed/attention.
Took a group photo yesterday with my home birth dr (grey shirt) and his midwife (right) along. I look like crap.... but I like the photo.