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Postpartum Mamas - Page 2

post #21 of 79

Worldshakrz - My afterpains stopped about two days ago, I bet yours will subside soon.


I had a huge cry fest this morning.  DD is having a really hard time with this transition and doesn't know how to express herself.  Suprisingly she is not super clingy to me and she is super loving to her brother, but I think it is just the different or lack of routine since i am not able to help and do my normal tasks. This morning I woke up to her having a massive fit with Dh and my mom tring to get her dressed for preschool.  It makes me so sad to see and hear her so upset and I can't do much about it right now.  I miss her so much.  I hope that at least having the structure of preschool will help ease this transition.

post #22 of 79
These after pains sound awful!! I had cramping when I would nurse, they felt like I'd eaten something that didn't agree with me and was trying to hold it in. It went away after six days and by then the MW said my uterus was back to normal size.

I feel like we're finally rounding the corner on the breastfeeding. My left nipple is totally healed and doesn't get that searing pain during latch on anymore. What a huge freaking difference in how nice nursing is without pain!! Right boob is catching up, it's healing and that latching pain still makes my toes curl and gives me shivers but it's also improved. By Saturday (2 weeks old) I'm hoping we'll be fully healed nipple-wise. We're also getting the hang of side lying position, as usual it's fine on the left, right needs practice. What gives?? Either way, it's easier that sitting up and arranging pillows for cross cradle every couple hours through the night.

My baby blues type symptoms all seem to be focused on how DS and I aren't getting enough love from DH- which is completely irrational so I'm trying to shift my focus elsewhere. I keep having thoughts like he doesn't love me enough, he doesn't think i'm a good mom, he's missing these precious first days of the baby's life, we'll never get these days back etc It's weird because on the flip side i feel great about how i'm doing so far as a mom, and i am loving my pp body, feeling pretty good overall. Also, kind of funny new mom cliche, I had a minor anxiety attack if you could even call it that, sweats, nausea, racing heart, watching two pirate ships attack in the cartoon childrens movie Tin Tin the other night. I was thinking what if my son ends up in a big storm at sea, or worse fighting in a battle or he gets trapped in a fire?!! :0 Oh dear! Fish oil, exercise, vitamin D for me!! At least I can still recognize it as irrational, that comforts me, lol.

Hope you're all getting some rest and being well taken care of as you nurture your newborns! <3
post #23 of 79
Thread Starter 

Miranda, baby blues suck. And what's with the awful thoughts? I get them, too and wish they would just go away. I can't elaborate right now because I will burst into tears. My girls are sitting here and I hate crying in front of them.


Ok, enough about that! 


I left the house the other day with baby and DH. We drove to the store to pick some things up. Dexter was sleepy and didn't want to nurse before we left so of course he wanted to nurse when we got there - and there was no where to sit or anything. So we didn't get everything we needed and just left shortly after we got there. I did not enjoy leaving the house at all.


I have to go to the midwifes' office on Friday with Dexter. Ugh. Not looking forward to it.


I need to get back to some sense of normalcy around here. I'm such a control freak and I feel so out of control right now.


On a happy note, my daughters are doing better at their new school. I think they have started to settle in. Thank god for that. It was such a huge pain in my heart.


As for physical recovery, I am doing great. Bleeding is comparable to a light period. I no longer even feel bruised. I have lost a total of 29 lbs since birth. I am so happy about that! I love breastfeeding! LOL Let's hope breastfeeding will help drop another 10-20 without me doing anything. LOL I am not even considering exercise until end of October. I just want to do nothing right now.

post #24 of 79
Jude was 1 month old on saturday! time is already flying and I am finding myself thinking wistfully about our first week or two pp! enjoy it while you can ladies! soon it will be back to business as usual...
post #25 of 79

I have managed to get a little sleep in, but my moodiness is getting worse. The birth high has completely faded. Baby Annabelle wants to be at breast all day long for comfort or nursing at random times. I am not really able to eat or drink water much. I had some people from the stroller boot camp I was a part of who signed up to bring me meals and almost everyone flaked out with no notice. I have to admit that I feel a little hurt.


As far as weight loss, Ive lost about 22 pounds so far and hoping to lose another 15-20 to get back down to my pre-preg size before my son 2 years ago.  I started walking again yesterday. I was actually proud of myself for managing my 1 year old in the bob stroller, baby in the wrap, and our hyper jack russel/doxie rescue mix all by myself. Husband joined me today so it was a little easier and I was able to make it a little farther. Im striving toward taking 2 walks a day, morning and night, to try and get back in shape and get some fresh air. I am going nuts at home 24/7 trying to juggle baby, 1 year old, work and an online class im taking. We do have a nanny about 30 hours a week, so that helps out a bit with making sure my son gets the attention he needs, but I feel terrible that I am not able to give him all the love and attention he deserves from me. My husband and nanny have taken over almost 90% of the responisibilities with him and he is really getting emotional about it. We used to take naps together during the week and every morning and get our cuddle time in. Now he is standing up at my knee crying as Im nursing baby Annabelle, wanting all the attention for himself! Ahhh!


As far as my physical recovery, Im still lightly bleeding, but such a huge difference between now and my recovery from my c-section. When I had my c-section it was like the worst period I had ever had for 6 weeks. I even passed a grapefruit sized clot at one point (while in the NICU bathroom of course and Im pretty sure they could hear me gasp when I saw the size of that thing!). My hip bones, butt muscles and back are all still very sore, but my stitches and tear are getting better. I feel like I need a really good massage... but doubt Ill get one at this point!


Anyone elses DH/SO going through an emotional let down from the birth too? I was reading Ina Mays Guide to Breastfeeding and she said some studies showed that men phyiscally expereince a lot of the same emotional/chemical highs through pregnancy and birth that women do. My husband has been sooooo touchy which is hard on me getting scant sleep (maybe 2-3 hours a day tops?) and no real time to eat or make anything other than this 100 calorie shake and go smoothie mix most of the time.

post #26 of 79

Maman- I hear you on wanting to get back to a sense of normalcy! I feel like I was finally getting there before the baby was born after having my son, going through the extensive medical problems he had when he was born and not knowing if he would live or not, then moving 1200 miles to be closer to family in CA, then buying a house, construction, and then getting ready for the birth, only to be thrown off again. I am a total control freak and have a hard time not having a routine and rhythm to my day and not accomplishing my daily 'to-do" list.

post #27 of 79

I think my afterpains have finally subsided, what a relief! Now I have something else going on though, that I don't remember happening before with my other two kids. I am having feelings of anxiety/sadness triggered by two things - when I feel my boobs "refill" with milk, and when Benji latches on for the first several minutes...I feel this sudden anxiety in my throat/chest. Just so odd. It doesn't last the whole nursing session thank goodness. Anyone else get this?

post #28 of 79
Thread Starter 

I feel that anxiety when someone else is holding my baby. Even DH. It lasts the whole time.

post #29 of 79

Joining the thread.. so far recovery has been going well. Thanks to my husband I've been able to essentially stay in bed with the baby, and I know that's gone a long way. The sleep deprivation is starting to kick in a bit- today was the first day I felt short of patience and a bit resentful of his getting more sleep than I am. We're going to have to work something out where I really make sure to nap enough, but the truth is I really love the late-night nursing sessions with the baby. I could stare at her forever if I didn't have to wake her up to feed. :)


Re: clots-- I'm so glad this site exists because there is just nowhere else I could talk about the fist-sized clot I had this morning, and I so want to talk about it, lol. I retained some membranes and had been given the heads-up to be on the lookout for them in the first day or so. Hadn't seen anything so I thought maybe I'd missed it on a trip to the bathroom. But no- this morning, I went to the bathroom and out came the membranes, except they didn't just fall out. They were attached to.. something.. and I couldn't figure out what it was, or bring myself to forcefully remove it without knowing. Called mw, who was not worried but willing to come out when I said I was nervous to do it myself, and we settled on waiting a few hours. Anyway, long story short.. yeah, gigantic clot, which was just incredible to begin with.. and I took a picture and sent it to my midwife.. and had my husband put it in the freezer.. and I just feel like I've passed into some secret world where that's all normal. I'm so very impressed with my husband for taking the trip with me- he's seen so much hardcore stuff in the last few days and hasn't even flinched. Incredible.


Okay, so obviously that's all about more than a clot.. I'm still in major processing mode. The birth was one of the most powerful things I've ever experienced, hands down. Can't stop thinking about it. What an amazing thing, and how lucky I feel to have had things go well (even more so after having a few moments late pregnancy where it looked like I might not even be able to try at home) and to have gone through it with the people I did. Wow, wow, wow.


I'm totally high on hormones, aren't I. Sheepish.gif

post #30 of 79

Alright, I'm going to jump in too.  I'm at 50 hours postpartum now.  Everything seems to be going very well, but holy afterpains Batman!  I know they tend to be worse with each child, but good grief.  Some are so bad I actually feel like I could throw up.  I actually did with one the night Canaan was born.  The midwife has had me taking Advil to deal with them since they are so bad.  I don't think I've taken Advil since my other son was born to deal with the afterpains I had with him!  It does help but it's been really hard on my stomach.  I've been trying to get by on the herbal afterpain tincture she left for me just because I don't really like taking the Advil at all.  So far...eh, it's been okay.  I have to work through each cramp as it happens which of course happen the most while I'm nursing.  And Canaan nurses all.the.time.  I know it's just a matter of time before they go away.  Canaan is doing very well and nursing has been pretty much a non-issue, thank goodness.  With DD we had a horrible start to breastfeeding for the whole first week.  My milk has started to come in and by this time tomorrow I'm sure it will be going pretty strong.  The only issue I seem to have with breastfeeding is right when the milk lets down I get this intense feeling of nausea.  I've had this with each of my children.  Well, apparently it's a type of syndrome!  I just happened to mention this to my midwife (also an LC) the other night and she told me about this!  Of course I can't remember the name of this right now.  I guess only about 5% or women get this and it also apparently comes with this overall feeling of sadness right after the nausea.  Now, I don't get the sadness, but maybe more of an anxious feeling.  After about one minute it's all totally gone and the rest of the nursing session is totally normal.  So weird!  So yeah...other than these two issues everything else is going very well.  Canaan sleeps really well and DH is doing a good job of trying to keep the house together and take care of the other kiddos.  It sounds like you other mamas are hanging in there pretty well.  I'm sorry to hear that some are dealing with baby blues!  I'm just waiting...I get my placenta capsules tomorrow morning and I'm hoping they will help head off any blues.  With DS1 around day four I had some weird emotional flux that finally resolved after a few days.  But man, it was not a nice feeling dealing with those strange emotions.  Hang in there mamas...it will get better.    

post #31 of 79
Originally Posted by Worldshakerz View Post

I think my afterpains have finally subsided, what a relief! Now I have something else going on though, that I don't remember happening before with my other two kids. I am having feelings of anxiety/sadness triggered by two things - when I feel my boobs "refill" with milk, and when Benji latches on for the first several minutes...I feel this sudden anxiety in my throat/chest. Just so odd. It doesn't last the whole nursing session thank goodness. Anyone else get this?

nak, but could it be this? http://d-mer.org/

post #32 of 79
Saying hey!

The good: I'm on day 5 postpartum. bleeding is light to mild. I've lost all of my baby weight!

The bad: afterpains are terrible!

The ugly: I had a mild postpartum hemorrhage after Nova was born. I lost a lot of blood. we were discharged from the hospital on Thursday morning. my hemoglobin was 6.3. my midwife had wanted to transfuse, OB attending said no. I was remitted later that night. tachycardia and chest pains from the anemia. I received two units of blood.. I am feeling much better and can go home today! Hemoglobin is 10.2!

The sad: I havent seen my baby in 30 hours. I am on a cardiac floor and she can't be here. She is taking formula well, DH has been picking up milk from me as well. I was using my single medela manual pump at first, but the wonderful (male!) nurse in the ER called the lactation consultant, who brought up a hospital grade ameda pump. I've been pumping every three hours and the nurses are storing my breastmilk.

Wild ride! I hope baby has no nipple confusion greensad.gif my supply is just fine though. I miss her!!!
post #33 of 79

WCM, this helps avoid nipple confusion. http://www.bfar.org/bottlefeeding.pdf

post #34 of 79
Thread Starter 

Sigh. My baby blues are definitely turning into PPD. Ugh. I hate this. I've been taking fish oil, vitamin D and St. John's Wart but it hasn't been long enough to have any affect. My midwife has referred me to a counsellor but I haven't heard back from them yet. I just want to feel normal.

post #35 of 79
Originally Posted by Yeeska View Post

nak, but could it be this? http://d-mer.org/


I think it might be! Wow, very interesting...

post #36 of 79

MamanF, I'm sorry to hear that, but I'm so glad you're attentive and on top of it. I hope the counselor gets back to you first thing next week so you can kick this square in the ass ASAP.


Oh, sleep deprivation.. Today it's officially ridiculous. I want to strangle my husband when he goes to take a nap in the middle of the day. He takes good care of me during the daytime, and he is on diaper duty at night, but that's really only been once a night versus my set alarm-breastfeed-settle-rinse and repeat all night every night marathon. I'm using precious downtime to read about newborn poop*, troubleshoot breastfeeding, and look for preemie-sized clothes. He's using downtime to.. learn to play the guitar. It's all totally magnified by the tiredness- he is really doing nothing wrong (not like he can take over the nursing!) and I know I need to be doing a better job of being really proactive about getting daytime sleep because I've never been able to sleep while the sun's out.. but I seriously want to strangle him when he talks about being tired. SHUT UP. YOU DON'T GET TO COMPLAIN ABOUT BEING TIRED. I WIN AT TIRED AND ALL OTHER SUFFERING. /rant


*We were wondering today where R.'s first all-breastmilk poop was and why we hadn't seen it yet at almost the end of the fifth day. And then she had it all over my belly. Problem solved! ;)

post #37 of 79
Thread Starter 

hyde, I totally hear you. If DH even looks tired during the day I want to divorce him. lol.gif If he would go take a nap, oh man, I would end up in prison.

post #38 of 79
Ugh about 'sleepy' husbands. Mine visited at the hospital today and took a nap. So i had three kids..nice lol. I woke him up 1.5hts later and he complained that he didn't get a lot of sleep the past two nights. Well, duh. I'm so so glad my mom is here. She's doing an awesome job taking care of the older two kids. She grocery shops, does laundry, takes kids to school, cooks, cleans etc. I'm getting to know her on a whole nother level.

Anyway: re: breastfeeding. It's going good here. We're on yellow poop with only one oz weight lost. They were gonna discharge us today but one bili test is still due at 9:30pm tonight. So we'll get to go home tomorrow morning instead.

Clots and bleeding: none so far (bout 40hrs post partum). Bleeding is ok, i hate it but i guess you gotta do what you gotta do. The nurse suggested a sitzbath but i couldn't do it. I cannot sit down right now without support under my bum (like on a toilet). I feel like my insides are gonna fall out. It's better to just shower and have water run over that area.

Depression: i sure do hope i wont get anything. I haven't been crying so far, still on a baby high.

Weight loss: i'm craving chocolate..omg...i had two snickers bars and two ghirardelli chocolate bars yesterday. I'm trying to contain myself but i can't help it, lol. So needless to say i don't know how much i have lost so far. According to dd 'my belly is still big' smile.gif.
post #39 of 79
Thread Starter 

MissE - I am obsessed with chocolate right now and have been since the baby was born. Weird! I've sent DH to the store several times for chocolate.

post #40 of 79
I get to join this thread! I'm about 40 hours postpartum. Things are okay I guess. Last night was kind of rough though. I was pretty much functioning on two hours of sleep with none the night before.... on Thursday we walked 2.5 miles in the morning, hiked in the mountains (including a huge uphill climb to a fire lookout tower) for over an hour, then walked another two miles in the evening and since I was having contractions, I couldn't sleep and eventually birthed Leo at 4:30am and didn't really sleep that day either. Phew. Anyway, last night Leo got really worked up and wouldn't/couldn't settle down to nurse and I just started crying feeling like I was completely failing, etc. Thankfully, dh got up and offered to try to walk around with him and by some miracle it worked to settle him down! So he told me to sleep. I said I just needed 30 minutes and dh said I was asleep before my head even hit the pillow!! I slept one glorious hour and it was good. The rest of the night was nice and uneventful.

Leo is improving with nursing and has a good, powerful suck going on. Real life kicked in tonight since the four older girls stayed at my parents' house the last two nights, but they're all home tonight. Knockonwood they all sleep well.

Afterpains are the devil incarnate, I swear. Ugh.

Mote I wanted to address but Leo needs to nurse and my phone needs plugged in.
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