I am tired of the tears over working. DS (5th grade) would do nothing ever if I was okay with it. Each week I make a Word table of work. There are 7 columns- subject, notes for the week, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. Then I have multiple rows- one for each subject area, plus one for each member of the family for things that may affect our time (like evening events). Ds has been fussing about how much work I give him. Doesn't matter if it is next to nothing. Tears! I talk to him about what he likes and focus on that. I try to rearrange what he does not like to make it as "fun" as possible. I knock things off as I find he is unable to complete all. I type for him and act like a scribe. Nothing seems to help.
Today, I did something that threw him off in an effort to get him back into the joys of doing this. I did all his planning as usual. Then I turned the text to white in all the assignment squares and printed it. He got 7 columns, 5 of which were empty. The subject column and the notes (goals) for the week were filled. I told him that he should plan what to do, that he needed to work in all subjects, but he is in control of how that happens. He should fill in assignments as he completes them. When he asked about what he should be doing, he and I looked and verbally tried to plan out. I made it clear if he does his very best, good things will happen at the end of the week (he has been trying to earn a special treat) and if he doesn't he probably won't be happy (he will need to work over the weekend rather than have free time).
Tonight, the neighbor rang to play. I told him I did not think it was a good idea, he needed to do a bit more work (he had not done anything but read his social studies and his reading story for the week). He said he was fine, had done plenty and ran out. He came back in when I called him in later. I told him he needed to fill in his chart subject by subject since he was done. He realized how little he did and that he basically shot himself in the foot and... you guessed it... melted into tears.
It is almost midquarter for us and I am feeling frustrated. I know the best thing for him is not for me to put him in public school and deal with the consequences in a public manner, but it is tempting! I am so tired of the laziness and tears.