There are a couple current threads about sleep schedules and bedtimes and this is all related, but my boy (28 months) seems to be in a major sleep transition right now and I need some advice. We wake up around 7:30-8am and he seems on most days to still need his nap, which used to be one hour and start around 1:00. About a month ago he started sometimes napping up to 3 hours, which he had never done before! It's usually around 1.5-2 hours though. I also noticed he often wants to nap later, more like 2:00 or later, which is too late if you ask me. And then there are those days, maybe 1-2x/week, where he just doesn't go to sleep for his nap anymore. Around the same time all this started shifting he also started not falling asleep easily at night anymore. We do our bedtime routine starting around 7 and he used to go to bed at about 8:30. But lately we are lucky if he goes down by 9:30 and it's usually more like 10 or sometimes later! There have been a lot of transitions lately ~ we moved in June, he switched from private in-home daycare to preschool (which he loves!) and still isn't on the full schedule there (which could include a nap but isn't mandatory, he will be staying until 2:00, for now I pick him up after lunch at 12:30). We also nightweaned (which was very easy) and are planning on weaning soon ~as of now he only nurses to sleep and not more, but it's driving me nuts because when he doesn't fall asleep I get very irritated because I have almost no milk and I can only nurse about 10-15 mins and if he hasn't fallen asleep by then I have to take a break.
I am utterly confused. I am a little scared to wean him off falling asleep at the breast but it makes it that much worse when he won't fall asleep at bedtime. It ends in me being frustrated and him in tears, almost every night. I also wonder if it's time to purposely drop his nap. DH is against that and feels it's not fair to deprive a child of sleep if they are tired. But I notice on the days he doesn't nap he does go to bed around 8. However, if he doesn't nap it means we can't do anything in the afternoon that involves using the stroller or car because he'd fall asleep on the way home (around 4-6pm) and then that would really blow bedtime. I remember the transition from 2 naps to one took many months, and I assume from one to no nap is similar.
Can anyone share stories of how you transitioned out of the nap, or off falling asleep at the breast? How old was your child when these things happened? I feel like it's time to establish a clearer routine because almost every night ends in major frustration for all of us. It just isn't working anymore. Please help if you've BTDT or are there now. Thanks!