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Husband very angry that Family Safety is installed

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 

My husband has a porn addiction and so at work, (We own a business) I installed the family safety filter.  He said if it would make me feel better then install it on the home computers too.  Last night he went balistic on me and raged that I needed to get it off his computer. 

So I did. 

 

he admits to a sex addiction and calls it "relapses".  I don't know what to do.  he does not want any accountabilty.

post #2 of 3
That's tough. You can't fix DH's addiction for him but you can keep your family safe. At our house the deal is that zero adult content is accessed on the desktop computer or tablet. DD is only 18 months old but once she gets older, parental controls are going on both of those. Both DH and I have a smartphone though and that is the only place we've agreed to access any questionable material since DD will not have access to it. We don't have addiction to deal with but it's not unheard of for us to indulge from time to time, especially when day to day life with a toddler puts a damper on our physical intimacy. I don't know if you have kids but it's absolutely your right to protect your family (yourself included) from porn despite your partner's objections. Honestly in your shoes I'd put the filter back on all laptops/desktops and tell him to use his phone (or get a used iPod touch if he doesn't have one). His other option is immediate counseling to get a handle on the addiction. This way he is fully responsible for the one handheld device that may have inappropriate content and you won't have to worry about who sees or uses his computer. If he balks because of the small screen/limited software, etc then tell him that this is the compromise you feel safe with making until he can take some accountability for his actions. I would be looking into counseling to ensure that his unchecked addiction doesn't cause an irreparable rift between you. I hope you find a way to get him to understand how much this bothers you. I hope you find something useful in my post.
post #3 of 3
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tearose84 View Post

My husband has a porn addiction and so at work, (We own a business) I installed the family safety filter.  He said if it would make me feel better then install it on the home computers too.  Last night he went balistic on me and raged that I needed to get it off his computer. 

So I did. 

 

he admits to a sex addiction and calls it "relapses".  I don't know what to do.  he does not want any accountabilty.


The way you described this is scary. He needs addiction counseling asap!

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