Mothering › Mothering Discussion Forums › Health › Health and Healing › Found a breast lump & trying to stay calm... Update: Cancer.
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Found a breast lump & trying to stay calm... Update: Cancer. - Page 2

post #21 of 62
Thread Starter 
OK so I went for the ultrasound and they called the doctor in & immediately sent me for a mammogram & biopsy. Now I'm just waiting for the biopsy results. It will probably be a few days. The testing was tough and way more extensive than I was anticipating but I am glad I went... and glad that part is over with. I genuinely expected them to just tell me it's a cyst & send me on my merry way but I guess the mass was a bit concerning. They are thinking/hoping it's just a benign fibroadenoma but we won't know for sure 'til next week.
post #22 of 62

Couldn't read this and not post. I hope it turns out to be nothing serious! hug2.gif I'll be thinking about you.

post #23 of 62

Glad you got checked out.  Hope you get results soon.  :)  If you end up needing surgery or anything like that, please feel free to PM me if you want someone to talk to.  :)

post #24 of 62

Oh, waiting for results just sucks.  I hope it's a short wait, and that they're right about "benign."  Definitely thinking good thoughts for you here.

post #25 of 62
Thread Starter 
It's cancer.
post #26 of 62
I'm so sorry to hear that.

Good for you for catching it early and getting checked.
post #27 of 62

Oh no!  I'm so sorry to hear that.

post #28 of 62
Prayers and strength heading your way.....
post #29 of 62

<<<HUGS>>> Thinking of you and praying for healing and strength for you.

post #30 of 62

I'm so sorry!

post #31 of 62
hug2.gif

I'm so sorry...healing thoughts coming your way
post #32 of 62
How are you feeling about this? Do you have support? I'm sure this is very scary and I do hope that you have some IRL support to lean on.
post #33 of 62
Thread Starter 
Thank you all. I'm sort of... coming out of denial? I do have a group of amazing real-life friends who I know will support me through this, both emotionally and practically. I'm scared. I can deal with the physical aspects, I can even deal with losing my breasts, my hair, whatever... if it comes to that. What I can't deal with is the possibility of leaving DS motherless. And I am so tired of not sleeping, panic attacks, all of that...

I have been sick for 7 years with chronic fatigue/autoimmune issues/etc. plus PTSD. And really, in my entire life, I've never been 100% healthy. So in a way, I feel prepared. DS has never known me "not sick" so hopefully it won't be too much of a drastic change for him to have me especially unwell. DH has taken care of me from the beginning and I know he will continue to do so through this. I am used to tests and doctors and hospitals. But cancer has so much loaded meaning, so much weight... I am trying to focus on my grandmother. She lived for over 50 years after her mastectomy, and died of an unrelated illness. I never thought I'd say this, but I hope she passed the same genes on to me & it's the same type of cancer and easily treatable. I hope I caught it in time and that waiting that ~4 months to push for more tests doesn't mean I did myself in.

I will probably feel a bit better once I have more details and meet with the surgeon. In fact, as horrible as this is, it feels better to know. I like knowing what I'm dealing with. I am going to be strong. I am going to beat this.

And I want to curl up into a ball and cry and never get up.
post #34 of 62
Oh Crubchymama! Hugs!
post #35 of 62

praying.gif  hug2.gif

post #36 of 62
I'm so sorry! That was what I was worried about but hoping you wouldn't hear.

What's next for you? What can we do?

I've been finding the Knitters with Breast Cancer group on Ravelry very supportive. I am really sure they don't require you to knit.
post #37 of 62

I'm so sorry to hear this news.

 

hug2.gif

post #38 of 62
So sorry it's cancer...Young Survival Coalition is a great resource too and has an online forum. Youngsurvival.org
The waiting was always the hardest for me too. Our minds can create so much worse scenarios. Sending hugs your way!
post #39 of 62
One foot in front of the other....

And to beat a dead horse, apply for SSDI. When you have an oncologist, the office may have a social worker who can help.
post #40 of 62

I couldn't read this and not post. I am so sorry crunchy_mommy!

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