Pass a slice of humble pie, please. Over-scheduled 11 year old? - Page 2

[pattimomma]

Originally Posted by IdentityCrisisMama 

Ok, great! This all sounds like we're more in a good place or at least going in the right direction. I don't know what I was expecting -- maybe I was just having worries that one gets when entering new territory. DC already does her own lunch, often breakfast (depending on what we have to eat). She's amazing with organizing her space and taking care of her clothing, baths and etc. She puts her laundry away and the dirty in the bin. I've decided that I can't do laundry every week so we're going down to every other Sunday. DC will be in charge of being sure she doesn't go through all her clothes before then and telling me if we need to make any changes to this new plan. I have the calendar printed on the fridge and I'll ask her to be aware of her own activities and plan for them.  I'll leave the drama club chores/responsibility up to her because it's something that is less important for her to comply with. She can also be in charge of soccer and her dad can also help with that. 

I think I'll need to help her with homework because it's a new thing and I can tell there are some essential skills that she's lacking as far as getting it done quickly. I feel the need to supervise her work for the Monday thing (it's a coveted spot that I want her to be invited back for). 

I'm becoming less worried about this new lifestyle we've got going on and am a bit excited for having such a heavy routine. DC seems fine so far - hopefully things will remain good for her. 

Sounds like things are working out great. My DD is a freshman in high school and she has a lot going on. Every time she wants to add a new activity we have a discussion about the time commitment and what she will do if she gets stretched too thin. It sounds like your DD is handling it great and that she will let you know if it gets to be too much.

[wildmonkeys]

That sounds like a very reasonable fall schedule to me.

[IdentityCrisisMama]

Thanks, everyone! It's working out OK. This week was a bit hectic so far with one day that DC only had like 10 minutes to herself before her bedtime. Then last night she was really dragging at soccer and had to come home and go straight to bed. It's only a month of this busy schedule though so we'll see...

[zebra15]

My 12 yr old has something almost every afternoon.  (he does homeschool) but there is still planning and time constraints.

3 nights a week there is swim team.  

2 nights there is a library trip (min 2x a week).

1-2x a month there is a swim meet - this can be 1 or both weekend days, it can be 1 hr or all weekend long.

After swim team my kiddo is exhausted, hungry and cranky.  He really needs to go straight home, take a shower, have dinner and rest for a bit.   

Some weeks we have extra activities but mostly I can plan on every evening being out of the house from 330-6pm,   DS would love to add theater back into the mix but I just don't see how to fit it in right now.

[jdsf]

Honestly, this is the time to be doing these sorts of activities. Now that both of my girls are out of elementary school, I am realizing how poor their time management skills are and I wish I had gotten them more involved at this age. They have come to feel entitled to a certain amount of down time and cut corners on homework and chores just so they can have the same amount of time they used to for screens and other activities that aren't really bettering them much. When they were little (5-9) they had piano lessons, dance class, and other activities to keep them occupied. Once they hit 10 or 11 and started getting "real homework" it tapered off a little. They are still required to do music of some kind, but we can go to the gym as a family now that they're older so we don't have the physical requirement anymore. They aren't much for team sports anyway, so it works out. Honestly, dd 14 has so much homework that the only extracurricular she does is cake club (they make baked goods for the entire school bi-monthly, so it's strengthening her cooking and community building skills, so I'm happy with that choice) and she is in theater and wants to try out for a play next year. I wish she had the time to do other stuff, but she goes to a super competitive magnet school so if she does well, she really could go to Yale like she's always wanted to. My younger dd just started middle school this year, so we're not pushing her to do anything besides choir since its been a rough adjustment. Next year we want her to do something more, even if its just a dance class or something once a week, since she still has a little bit of free time left til high school.