October 2012 Rockstar Mamas - Page 3

[onetwoten]

I get what you mean about it not necessarily being easier or harder. It's just... different. It was nice being able to go out and not worry if we brought anything-- because I -HAD- her food! Now I'm like ok, gotta grab some sort of snack... and it probably shouldn't always be cheerios! So then I'm trying to find healthy, portable things. On the other hand-- we bus a lot, and I -hate- nursing on the bus. It's just SO awkward, so it's nice that she's now eating solids enough that if I can tell she wants to nurse and is getting fussy, then I'll just pull out one of her snacks and distract her with that until we get somewhere. 

Oh, and I would LOVE to not have to wear nursing clothes anymore. It sounds so silly,  but that's my only sadness with full term nursing. I can't wait to get back into my clothes. Of course, I know that as she gets older and nurses less, I will be able ot wear more and more of them, we're getting there. Just not there yet. The last few weeks when we've been doing more outings we've had a handful of times where we've been out and I've gone 4 hours or more without nursing. She makes up for it when we get home, but at least I"m not worried about the logistics of it while we're out, you know? 

Yay for sleeping... but.. boo on oversleeping! lol

So... Ten slept that first stretch for 2.5 hours, and then another 2 hours, and then she went between 45minutes to 2 hours for the rest of the night. Not bad! It's an improvement over every hour all night long. I like... had dreams last night! lol. That means I actually fell asleep long enough for my brain to hit that sleep stage! lol

[MarineWife]

Wow, you'll have to kmp about whether or not that Calms Forte continues to work. I got some for K but it didn't seem to help. He's settling and falling asleep a lot more easily these days so I don't feel the need for it anymore.

Just something to keep in mind (if it matters), if you offer snacks when you know baby wants to nurse, you are essentially actively weaning her.

My kids don't like bananas! What's up with that? I guess I shouldn't be too surprised because I don't like bananas but I thought all kids, or at least babies, liked them.

I'm finally get a day to do some things around the house. DH still hasn't finished putting away the stuff he said he'd put away Sunday. The backyard is such a mess that I can't let D out there anymore. It's not safe and it's ridiculous for me to chase him around and constantly pull him away from this and that, not to mention that one gate and one section of fence have completely fallen off. I told dh I want him to clean it all up and fix it before he leaves for the rest of the month.

I'm going to try to clean the downstairs bathroom and playroom today.

[onetwoten]

I will! She's down for her nap right now, which averages 30 minutes. She fussed herself to sleep, since I was rocking and cuddling her (after nursing) and she kept pushign away from me and couldn't be comfy, so I put her in her crib to play around for a bit, while I sat in the rocker and read. It took maybe 20 minutes after I put her down (so like 35 total), but she fell asleep cuddled into her blanket. It's been an hour now... 

I'm not really worried about it being 'actively weaning' her since it only happens when we're on the bus or in the middle of grocery shopping or something. If we're at home, or out somewhere where we have the opportunity, then obviously she nurses whenever she asks. She's actually getting better about signing for it again, which is nice! She used to, and then decided she would just cry instead. So the 'words' are nice again!

Yay for cleaning days! Once Ten gets up we're going to find lunch, and then I'm going to put her in the Boba and try to get some tidying done. Tonight DH should be able to do the final sanding on the laundry room, and then -in theory- be able to prime tomorrow!! I'm so freaking excited!

[Baby_Cakes]

Just popping in for a min - JJ have you tried the baby gorilla position for nursing on the bus?  It saves my life out and about!  You put them on your lap sitting facing you.  You're totally covered and it works for buses, planes, trains, stadium seats, etc!

I don't think setting limits out in public is the same as weaning.  They're getting into toddlerhood now, and sometimes it isn't as convenient or necessary when a solid snack will also work to hold them over.  

I don't want to jinx it but I got sleep last night!  And he took a solid 3 hour nap again today.  That's like a week of 3 hour naps and pretty ok sleep for him!  I will enjoy it while it lasts.  LOL.  We also have a molar (did I say that here already??)!  One has cut thru and the rest are bulging just below.  Molars can take a long time so I'm in for it!

[MarineWife]

[quote name="Baby_Cakes" url="/community/t/1364692/october-2012-rockstar-mamas/40#post_17130094"I don't think setting limits out in public is the same as weaning.  They're getting into toddlerhood now, and sometimes it isn't as convenient or necessary when a solid snack will also work to hold them over.[/quote]

Well, that's why I wanted to point that out. It is weaning whether anyone wants it to be or not. I didn't meant to actively wean Ryan but I did by giving him solids before or in place of nursing sometimes. It didn't occur to me that that was weaning because that wasn't my goal. KWIM?

Technically, as soon as you start offering solids you are starting the weaning process. Anytime that you substitute solid food for nursing, you are actively weaning. That's why it's important to offer nursing before solid food if you don't want baby to wean too early. I'm not making a judgment on it one way or another. That's just how it works.

Now that I'm thinking of it, maybe I should try giving some of that Calms Forte to Dylan. He is hard to settle down most nights. Last night he wanted to crawl all over the bed flopping on and smacking everyone, even poor Kellen who was sleeping. (I still can't get over that he's the one who's asleep first these days.)

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

Just popping in for a min - JJ have you tried the baby gorilla position for nursing on the bus?  It saves my life out and about!  You put them on your lap sitting facing you.  You're totally covered and it works for buses, planes, trains, stadium seats, etc!

I don't think setting limits out in public is the same as weaning.  They're getting into toddlerhood now, and sometimes it isn't as convenient or necessary when a solid snack will also work to hold them over.  

I don't want to jinx it but I got sleep last night!  And he took a solid 3 hour nap again today.  That's like a week of 3 hour naps and pretty ok sleep for him!  I will enjoy it while it lasts.  LOL.  We also have a molar (did I say that here already??)!  One has cut thru and the rest are bulging just below.  Molars can take a long time so I'm in for it!

I have, it worked ok this summer, but more often now the problem is that I'm cold, so I'm in layers of clothing, so I'm trying to pull up or down like 4 layers, plus I've usually still got the carrier on, so then I've got to unbuckle that, but still try to keep it on the seat, and then balance myself and all our layers, the diaper bag, and Tenley as she randomly pops on and off making faces at everyone on the bus. lol. Between trying to reach the boob through the layers, and keep track of our stuff, it's hectic! Thankfully we're usually on our way to a LLL meeting or something equally baby focused, so once we get there, I can strip off layers, drop our things and have a good nurse.

Hour and 15m morning nap today. Was so nice! And then a 15 minute pm nap. LOL Oh well, I guess it evens out!

[Baby_Cakes]

Oh I get what you are saying now.  Yes!  Agreed! 

Honestly I think that's how my friend's 17 mo old ended up weaning entirely.  By 12 mo she was only nursing before bed and in the am.  By 18 mo she was completely done.  But that's what happens when you stop offering or when you don't make a it a point to continue offering milk even when they seem satisfied with solids.  There are so many benefits to bm besides a full tummy.  It's so worth it IMO to keep going!!  

I get panicky when I realize it's been awhile since I nursed Finn.  I am in complete denial about him ever weaning.  

[AnnieA]

I'm still mostly in maternity clothes. But after seeing the pics of me, MW and Baby_Cakes in Williamsburg, I really need to stop wearing them. It looks awful. Too cheap to buy new stuff though. Will have to raid my DSDs room again and see what I can find.

AF is here. And I want to curl up in a ball and die. The cramps this cycle have been AWFUL.

Drop-off at the babysitter today was not fun. I asked Ava this morning if she had fun playing with the other kids and she looked me right in the eye and said "No". That's the first time she's ever even said that word and she used it very specifically. I didn't react, I just said "Oh, well I thought you would have had fun playing with the other kids?" and she said it again. "No." So when it was time to go over, I was watching her while we walked to the neighbor's house and I could tell she was nervous but she wasn't stressed, you know? She wasn't clinging to me or anything. When we got there, the babysitter tried to take her out of my arms and she didn't like that. So I just said calmly, let's sit down and play for a bit. And she started playing and rolling a ball to the babysitter. She wanted to sit on the ride on toy and I got her situated on that and then I told her I loved her and I would see her tonight. I left and she was screaming. Oh and the other thing is that she can see our house from their living room and the babysitter said she kept going to the door, pointing to our house and saying "Mama, Mama". Times like this, I HATE GOING TO WORK! Needing insurance sucks my butt! But I talked to DH after he picked her up and he said when he got there, she was having a blast and didn't want to leave with him. So she must have settled down. We'll see how she does on Monday.
 

[MarineWife]

Annie ~ FWIW, that's a normal reaction. That probably doesn't make you feel any better but at least she's not overly upset by it. And, I didn't think you looked bad. I still wear maternity clothes sometimes. I'm too cheap to buy myself a whole new wardrobe, also. Since I've been through this a few times before, though, I do have some graduated sizes of clothes. I just had to pull my larger jeans out again because the smaller ones I had been fitting in are too tight again.

[AnnieA]

I know it's a reasonable response, I just hate putting her in that position. I've never been one to subscribe to the theory that with enough exposure, the kid will get used to it and stop crying. That may be the case but I'd rather stop, wait for a different level of maturity and then try again. Car rides are a good example. When Ava went through her car-hating phase, I just stopped going places with her unless they were absolutely necessary such as dr/hospital visits or going to the babysitter when I had to go to work. Once she got a bit older, she was fine again in the car. I also hate that if I chose not to work (because let's face it, there's always the choice to do that), the consequence would be harmful from a variety of standpoints.

[Baby_Cakes]

Bad drop offs are the worst. I'm with you, Lauri, I'd also rather wait till the timing is right and the maturity is there. But sometimes we don't have that choice, really, so we make the best of a bad situation.
Ava is so smart and sensitive. I bet if you started reading her some books, like Llama Llama misses mama, and I Love You All Day Long, she would understand. We also like The Kissing Hand. They really helped us with Noras transition to preschool.

I've put on a few inches of chub. I need to get serious about eating better. I just really love to eat. I need to snap out of it!!

Sent from my SGH-T999 using Tapatalk 2

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

I bet if you started reading her some books, like Llama Llama misses mama, and I Love You All Day Long, she would understand. We also like The Kissing Hand. They really helped us with Noras transition to preschool.
 

Oooh, I'll have to look for some of those. I bet that would help. I've been talking to her about it the last couple of days reminding her that she's going to play with the other kids for a little while and then Dada is going to pick her up. She's just nervous. It would probably be easier if I was doing the pickup too because then she would have me not only leave but come back. As it is now, she just sees me leave and then I show up again in the middle of the night. The night before last, she woke up around 4 AM and said "Mom?". I answered her and said I was here and she flopped over for snuggles. Gawd, I love that girl!

[MarineWife]

Yeah, Annie, I agree. But, like Carrie said, sometimes you don't have a choice.

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

Oh I get what you are saying now.  Yes!  Agreed! 

Honestly I think that's how my friend's 17 mo old ended up weaning entirely.  By 12 mo she was only nursing before bed and in the am.  By 18 mo she was completely done.  But that's what happens when you stop offering or when you don't make a it a point to continue offering milk even when they seem satisfied with solids.  There are so many benefits to bm besides a full tummy.  It's so worth it IMO to keep going!!  

I get panicky when I realize it's been awhile since I nursed Finn.  I am in complete denial about him ever weaning.  

Yikes! I can't imagine only nursing twice a day by 12 months! On days we're home, I'd say between 8am to 8pm, we probably nurse like... 8 times? She doesn't nurse for very long because she gets distracted, so I find more often than not, I'm the one just picking her up and nursing her, without her actually asking. And at night... geeze. At night she nurses probably another 8 times or more in those 12 hours.  It seems crazy to imagine her not needing to nurse. 

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

I'm still mostly in maternity clothes. But after seeing the pics of me, MW and Baby_Cakes in Williamsburg, I really need to stop wearing them. It looks awful. Too cheap to buy new stuff though. Will have to raid my DSDs room again and see what I can find.

Times like this, I HATE GOING TO WORK! Needing insurance sucks my butt! 

I'm wearing probably 50% mat clothes, mostly because the shape of them make them easier to nurse in, than the form fitting non-mat clothes I have. I think sometime in the next few weeks though I need to head to value village and work on getting some easier access nursing winter wear. 

Oh Annie. I can't imagine that decision. Or lack of decision really. I'm so sorry. 

[AnnieA]

Ethical question. I've pretty much decided to just skip Ava's 15 month WBV. We just saw her pedi last week when she had the crazy virus. I'm not doing any of the "15 month shots". I'm not concerned about her development. I'm not giving her the flu shot. But here's the problem. I kind of don't want to tell DH that I'm skipping the 15 month visit. He hasn't asked. I don't even think he knows that she's supposed to have a 15 month visit. But I don't feel like going in to all the reasons why I don't want to give Ava the variacella, MMR, Hep A or influenza shots. So I don't even want to point out to him that we're skipping it, you know? On the other hand, it makes me vaguely uncomfortable from a cardiac standpoint to not have eyes on her every couple of months. Next cardiac appt is Dec. Give it to me straight ladies.

[akind1]

Annie: I see no reason to go see the ped for a "check up" if she was just there last week. I also don't see any harm in just not mentioning to your DH about the visit. If he asks when her next appointment is, say December. (which would be a "couple of months" from her last doctor visit - Late september to December is just over 2 months) If he asks about what shots she's getting next, I would be honest, and say, probably none for now. Didn't she have a bit of reaction last time? DH is far more on board with no shots than I am. I see circumstances in which the benefits might outweigh the risk; he doesn't. (I don't think we are likely to fall into a situation where we would, but I can see how for some people, they feel its the best choice). With this next baby, I really wouldn't mind doing more WBV. At least newborn, 6 months, and then yearly. We just got lazy with Norah. I like the extra set of eyes and I really like the pedeatrician we found. Weaning: obviously we have actively early weaned, but it was a necessity. I just haven't made enough milk for her to even come close to 50% of what she needs per day since becoming pregnant. She is still nursing for a few minutes in the middle of the night, and once in a while for nap time during the day. I don't think I'm making more than just a little bit now, which is to be expected by this point in pregnancy - 18 weeks. I am shocked we have made it this far, honestly. We'll keep doing the night nursing as long as she wants it, especially now that it's only once or twice and very brief. (I need my sleep). If it weren't for pregnancy, I would love to nurse until age 2. and definitely more fully for the first year. This next baby will get all he or she wants of it, at last! Clothes: most of my tops are ones I can wear whether or not I'm pregnant, so they kind of look like maternity wear, regardless. I'm not in maternity jeans and pants yet, but likely will be by months end. Annie: don't beat yourself up about how you look. Have you tried thrift stores, etc, for clothes? A couple fresh pieces can make all the difference. Carrie: loving food and eating is not a bad thing. Heck, you love to eat more healthy stuff than most people. Just maybe ease up on the indulgences a bit, eh? (Says the woman who pregnant or not feels entitled to ice cream every night if it's in the house) Norah is sleeping so much better! Hallelujah! naps suck for DH sometimes, especially with Gabe. I think he's not getting enough physical stimulation to get tired. Need to work on that. He's not ready to give up his nap, because he inevitably passes out during the day for a couple hours - it's not like we put him down for a nap, you know?

[MarineWife]

NIP would be so much easier if we weren't so worried about exposing ourselves. I'm guilty of that, too. I try to keep myself as covered as possible. I'm not comfortable exposing my entire breast to nurse. But, I find myself more and more just not caring if I am exposed because I've got too much other stuff going on to worry about some stranger seeing my nipple. If they don't like it, they shouldn't be looking.

I have found the newer nursing clothes to be a waste of money. I thought the empire style tops would be a lot nicer to use than the ones that have two full layers in the front but I don't like them. I feel too exposed in them because of the slits in the layer underneath. I don't wear them anymore. The nursing tanks are a good investment because the keep my belly covered under any regular top except that I don't think to put one on until after I've got my regular bra and shirt on because I generally don't like to wear layers. Then I don't feel like changing.

Annie ~ I think if you aren't concerned about anything at the moment, it's ok to skip the check-up.

We have homeschool park day today and then dental appointments for the boys. Not sure if we'll make it to the park. I'm freakin' sick again! I don't feel too bad but I also don't feel like doing much.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by akind1 
Carrie: loving food and eating is not a bad thing. Heck, you love to eat more healthy stuff than most people. Just maybe ease up on the indulgences a bit, eh? (Says the woman who pregnant or not feels entitled to ice cream every night if it's in the house) 

My downfall is chips.  Somehow I have 3 opened bags of chips in the cabinet.  I just love them too too much! 

And I need to get back to working out.  I've been so tired it falls off my radar.

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

Ethical question. I've pretty much decided to just skip Ava's 15 month WBV. We just saw her pedi last week when she had the crazy virus. I'm not doing any of the "15 month shots". I'm not concerned about her development. I'm not giving her the flu shot. But here's the problem. I kind of don't want to tell DH that I'm skipping the 15 month visit. He hasn't asked. I don't even think he knows that she's supposed to have a 15 month visit. But I don't feel like going in to all the reasons why I don't want to give Ava the variacella, MMR, Hep A or influenza shots. So I don't even want to point out to him that we're skipping it, you know? On the other hand, it makes me vaguely uncomfortable from a cardiac standpoint to not have eyes on her every couple of months. Next cardiac appt is Dec. Give it to me straight ladies.

I'll say it's worth saying to DH that you don't feel it's necessary to take her in so soon after her last visit.  A lie by omission is still a lie IMHO.

I'm the opposite though.  I wouldn't feel I need to justify all my reasons not to do XYZ shots.  Instead, I say to him if you want the baby to get them, convince me.  Convince me he needs them right now vs waiting.  Tell him he needs to go into all the reasons he wants to give Ava those vaccines.  Each time I've done that, Chris just defaults to what I've decided.

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

NIP would be so much easier if we weren't so worried about exposing ourselves. I'm guilty of that, too. I try to keep myself as covered as possible. I'm not comfortable exposing my entire breast to nurse. But, I find myself more and more just not caring if I am exposed because I've got too much other stuff going on to worry about some stranger seeing my nipple. If they don't like it, they shouldn't be looking.

Exactly.

I was just saying to a friend the other day that I NIP all the time and I've never had any issues with strangers saying anything.  Family says more things or acts more bothered than anyone ever has out in public.  Which is annoying.

TBH I get more uncomfortable about my tummy or muffin top showing than boobage.  To me they are just boobs.  Women and girls wear lower cut shirts and have more hanging out than I ever do while nursing, so that I don't feel odd about.  And I suppose I should feel the same about a little tummy skin showing since man, girls these days wear things so high cut and belly baring even when they shouldn't, lol!

AFM - I'm going out to dinner tonight and DH is watching the kids and putting them to bed!  He's never done it.  It's time.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by onetwoten 

Yikes! I can't imagine only nursing twice a day by 12 months! On days we're home, I'd say between 8am to 8pm, we probably nurse like... 8 times? She doesn't nurse for very long because she gets distracted, so I find more often than not, I'm the one just picking her up and nursing her, without her actually asking. And at night... geeze. At night she nurses probably another 8 times or more in those 12 hours.  It seems crazy to imagine her not needing to nurse. 

I should also point out that many decisions she made aren't what I would do or feel comfortable with.  She chose to night wean at 6 months like the dr said to, and CIO at 8 mo.  So.  It's all part of how you decide to parent.

It does seem completely crazy to me!  She asked me when C was 10 months if she needed to worry about her solids and I told her it's ok b/c before 1 they're just for fun -- as long as she's still getting most her nutrition from bm.  She was like, oh no way, she's only nursing maybe 2 times a day at most.  I was baffled.  I had to tell her I didn't know what to say b/c that's never been my experience.

[akind1]

MW: hooray for dinner out! I really don't like exposing a lot of skin, so I try to be discreet, and yes, family more than strangers seem bothered. WTF? Now, if I am in just a bunch of mom friends who also nurse, we whip out our boobs like it's NBD, because it's not. That said, I can't remember the last time I nursed Norah in public. It's been that long. Carrie: I can't imagine weaning that early on purpose. With Gabe, he was barely eating solids at this age. He didn't really actively eat more until around 14 months. (and then I got pregnant, and milk dried up and he weaned . . .) Now that I know how to nurse in every carrier I own, nursing discreetely is a lot easier and more convienent. I don't have to find a place to sit down! hooray! though I can't do it and push a cart. Might need to add that skill with the next squish.