October Chat Thread! « Back to Group Discussions

[NewMumJoy]

Hi Mamas!  I can't believe it's October and that many of our babies will be approaching 2 months old soon!  Figured I'd start a fresh new thread and since we're all busier with our LO's now, it might make sense to keep it open monthly for continuing chats...

Hope you are all doing well!

Over here, William will be 7wks old tomorrow - amazing to me how quickly time is passing.... He had his checkup last week and I was feeling all nostalgic as we passed through the halls of the hospital, knowing what transpired in that place.  I actually felt a bit  sad as we left, knowing I would never see it again (since we're moving back to the US) - crazy to feel that way about a place that I hated for so many months!!

So we move back to the east coast at the end of this month - I'm still wrapping my head around the logistics of it all, it's a bit overwhelming since I'm still kinda living day-to-day (sometimes hour-to-hour) with this LO.  We've already delayed our trip as much as possible and I'm hoping that in a few more weeks traveling w/William will be more manageable.  I'm so excited for my family and friends back home to finally meet this little guy!!

[LilyTiger]

Thanks for starting the new thread, NewMum!  I hope things are easier for you at the end of the month.  Are you flying or driving back to the US?  We have our first big trip next week and I'm a little scared.

Piper is seven weeks old today!  So crazy.  We have our two month appointment next week and overall we're doing pretty well with this craziness.  Life has gotten a little more difficult now that Piper has officially decided that she hates the car with a passion, so getting to work or shopping or anything means pretty much continual screaming.  :( 

We're still co-sleeping about half the night, which keeps me sane, and babywear almost continually during the day since she REALLY does not like being left alone.  But I've been able to get a fair amount done and I've been pumping small amounts so I can go workout or go shopping without having to freak out about when to be home.  So that's pretty liberating.  She's a pretty easy baby all things considered, at least as long as she has a boob handy, so I'm thankful for that.

I hope everyone's little ones are doing well! 

[intime0]

Hi guys.  I've been wondering if the DDC continued.  After having crosby 10 weeks early I was just hanging on for dear life. 

I have some PPD now but it seems to be lifting?  Maybe?  Who am I kidding.  LOL>  I want a big old chocolate bar and 12 hours of sleep. 

Anyway, he's 4 months old tomorrow.  But he's developmentally as old as everyone's baby on here.  He can't do anything a 4 monther can do.  Mostly he just smiles and coos.  Makes a momma with PPD and a preemie cry.  LOL
 

[LilyTiger]

intime!  So good to see you back on here!  And thanks for the Crosby update!  I know a lot of us wanted to know how you both were doing.  I'm sorry to hear about the PPD, though it's understandable considering all the stress you must have been under.  I hope you're feeling better soon.  Crosby's smiles and coos are probably the best medicine, but I hope you're getting lots of help at home too. 

[rebecca10]

Hi everyone! So good to hear from you intime! 

My baby is one month old today! Time's flying.  We had her 1 month appointment yesterday and everything looked great, except for a yeast infection she has on her labia, which we've started treating with Lotrimin. I hope it doesn't mean that I also have thrush.  She's already 10 lbs 3.5 oz, which puts her over 75 percentile.  It feels strange to have a pretty big baby, after my first daughter who barely keeps apace with the 5th percentile.  But it's so nice not to have concerns over whether she is eating enough. 

All in all, I feel like a pretty typical second time mom, which is to say the baby has seemed incredibly easy--really it's a vacation when it's just her, and on the other hand dealing with my toddler has been incredibly difficult--I don't think I was prepared for just how difficult it has been. A lot of days I find myself in or near tears, despite the fact that I have tons of help. It's not so much the work as it is seeing my daughter so changed and upset. It just breaks my heart, even though I know it is perfectly normal for a 2.5 year old with a new sibling.  The hardest thing has been the debacle that is her preschool situation.  She started a new preschool the same week as the baby arrived, and it went terribly.  And I just hate the teachers and think they were handling things entirely inappropriately (examples--when she was upset and crying asking for a hug, the told her she could have a hug after she ate her lunch and they refused to give her help washing her hands when she asked for it and just let her cry about it--so wrong on so many levels). So we pulled her out, but now are very confused about what to do, and I'm just so upset because I really thought the preschool we were sending her to was going to be a great place.  It's been really stressful.   

Also stressful has been tandem nursing.  My toddler wants milk all the time ( and has cut way back on eating regular food), and while I'm happy she still has that comfort, the timing of it all is difficult, since I rarely nurse them at the same time, and I find myself getting annoyed at long sessions, which I then feel bad about, and I worry that she's not getting enough solids. And sometimes I just feel sore and touched out.  Doesn't help that my husband is against me still nursing her, so I don't feel like I have anyone I can talk to about how hard it is.  But I'm certainly not going to wean now, so we are muddling through, and all in all, I am glad I didn't make her wean during pregnancy, since as jealous as she is by the baby getting to nurse, I think it would be even harder if she also didn't get her turn. 

Hope everyone is doing well!!!

[Veritas Vitae]

Newmum, good luck with the move, I'm sure it is daunting.  I hope things with William are starting to become easier.

Lily, that stinks about Piper not liking the car, that can be stressful. I know I get keyed up if Quinn is upset in the car, but luckily (knock on wood) she is mostly okay with it.

Intime, welcome back! I'm so happy to hear from you and to hear that Crosby is doing well, I'm sure the coos and smiles just melt your heart.  So sorry that you have been dealing with PPD, but hopefully it continues to get better.

Rebecca, sorry that your 2.5yo is having a tough time with the transition. It is probably good that you decided to tandem nurse.  My mom brought my twin sister and I home and had weened my 18mo sister 2 weeks beforehand (we were born 6 weeks premature so she had planned on weening 2 months prior).  My older sister resented us for years, not only did my mom come home with two babies when she didn't even want one (they didn't know we were going to be twins) but she was no longer allowed to nurse.  On the flip side, my sister allowed her older girls to nurse after the new babies were brought home and they seemed to have an easier transition (although by no means was it an easy transition).

AFM, B is out of town for two weeks straight (usually he comes home on the weekend) since he has his grandfathers funeral this weekend.  Quinn is 5.5 weeks old and is somewhere between 9 and 10 pounds (I need to get a better scale). I'm looking forward to Quinn's 6 weeks on Saturday since I can start going to the gym and dropping her in childcare. Fingers crossed, but Quinn has been a pretty easy baby, she is still waking up every 2-3 hours at night, but only for very brief periods.  She then sleeps most of the morning, early afternoon, and enjoys being in the swing to sleep, so I am able to get things done during that time period.  In the evening, she prefers to be held more, which I am fine with, I love having the time to cuddle with her.

I finally had to suck it up and take a shower with Quinn alone since she peed while I was changing her and was just covered in it.  I ended up just throwing the baby tub in the shower (we have the hammock type tub) and putting a towel over top of her while I washed myself, then I cleaned her (and you're right Ccoello they are super slippy) and put her back in the tub with the towel while I dried off.  She didn't seem to love being in the tub, she had a sort of "Are you serious, Mom?" face on, but she didn't cry.  I even dropped a shampoo bottle on her at one point (thankfully it was almost empty) and she didn't cry, although you could tell she was annoyed.  She actually doesn't cry that much at all.  She fusses briefly if she is hungry or has a dirty diaper, but it is more like a brief warning signal...like, hey, something needs to be taken care of.  She won't keep crying about any of that stuff, for the most part, unless you make her wait too long.

[midstreammama]

Code:

Originally Posted by LilyTiger 


Piper is seven weeks old today!  So crazy.  We have our two month appointment next week and overall we're doing pretty well with this craziness.  Life has gotten a little more difficult now that Piper has officially decided that she hates the car with a passion, so getting to work or shopping or anything means pretty much continual screaming.

This is us. I hate the car or going anywhere now, I have no idea what we are going to do. There is no relief. We have to be in the car..it's awful..I feel like a terrible person for letting him cry . I have tried everything. I think he just doesn't like being jostled but idk how to fix that..and by now he already has a negative association with the car seat, I thought it was getting better, but now we are back to screaming. So, I hear you, lily.
Edited by midstreammama - 10/3/12 at 9:56am

[Tizzy]

Has anyone tried bottles in the car?  Gil is really good until it gets dark, then (like his sister oddly enough) he just can't seem to handle it anymore.  I have a 3hr drive (there and back) planned this weekend and was thinking of pumping a couple bottles to see if that would help.  Also for various reasons his car seat is going to get moved to the front seat of our truck. I know that made a HUGE difference with DD, so I can kind of head him off before he gets too worked up.

I get pretty squirrely when he cries for any reason, which is thankfully not very often at all!  He sounds very similar to Quinn.

[intime0]

Oh goodness, I had one who cried constantly in the car.  It was stop, pull over, nurse her, calm her down, get her to sleep, take off again until the crying got too intense.  I loved it when my older daughter could drive us.  But when I had to go by myself, I took a bottle.  I could prop it up or have an older sib sit with her and hold it.  It helped with the crying.

Crosby is sleeping 7 hours at night now. Just started.  Prior he was waking up every hour or two...all day and night...so I have NO IDEA how or why this is happening, but I'm sure happy about it.  After that it's every 2 hours the rest of the night and all day.
 

[Ninetales]

Rebecca, I've dealt with yeast rashes, too.  Elsa had one awhile ago, and Oscar had one (plus oral thrush) so bad I needed to go get Nystatin for it.  They gave me Diflucan to clear up any yeast I might have but I never had any signs of thrush.  And when Oscar had it, Elsa didn't get it even though she still nurses.  So you won't necessarily get it.  :)

I am still tandem nursing, though I'm kind of over it.  I thought it would kind of be a novelty for her and she'd get bored but she's nursing more than when I dried up.  I don't want to discourage her just yet with her still transitioning to our new family life but it's getting old fast.  She demands it practically every time I feed the baby and while I don't mind too much during the day she's trying to do it at night again too and I can't sleep and it makes my skin crawl.

I mentioned this in another thread, but for those with car screamers, have you tried swaddling?  To do it safely, you put a thin blanket or swaddler in the seat so it's behind the baby, buckle and tighten the straps over baby, then swaddle the arms.  Oscar has improved immensely on car trips since I started doing it.

[Tizzy]

I think I'd have to use a diaper pin on the blanket as Gil has little helicopter arms lately lol!

[midstreammama]

Tizzy! The helicopter arms are so frustrating for me! He keeps knocking himself in the head and hurting himself! I know it must be hard for him too!

What is Gil short for? If you don't mind sharing..I ask because that's what we call Gilliam sometimes..and Gilly..among other knicknames. So, every time I see you write Gil I think..hey I didn't write that, oh, it's not my post..lol!

[Ninetales]

I use a piece of fabric with velcro and Oscar still Houdinis out sometimes!

[midstreammama]

What do you ladies do about them getting too hot? Gilly is a super heatbox! Seriously. He has pretty much been wearing a onesie and it hasn't been that hot out..and he still actually sweats. I'm wondering if he would get too hot? This little one is certainly a conundrum for me, that's for sure..nothing like my three girls.

[Tizzy]

Oh you actually use velcro? Well this is sounding more and more plausible I've always just tucked a light blanket in around their body and head, mostly to hold the soother in if they're alseep so they won't wake up when it falls out. Or "out of sight, out of mind" for the 2yr old older sibling who just loovvveeesss to help by pulling the plug out, then announcing to me that the baby is AWAKE! Hooray! LOL

Our Gil is for Gilbert, I keep doing the same thing with your posts I'll try not to be so lazy and just type out his full name.

Anyone else coming up with little nicknames? Gilburp, Gilby (the kids did that one!) Gillyweed (ode to HP).

We're now into fall/cooler weather in the 50's - 60's so I can't say much for the warm baby thing except that mine have always slept really really well when pretty warm. And that a thin layer is more cooling than completely naked.

[Veritas Vitae]

I have never been able to swaddle Quinn, she always sticks her arms straight up in the air, or on her head, messing with her hair.  The hair thing is funny because she looks like her dad, and her dad looks like his mom, and all three of them twiddle with their hair.  I've tried to wrap the blanket around Q to keep her arms tucked down but she starts fussing until I free her hands.  I'm  glad I didn't buy the velcro swaddle blankets; I had initially registered for two of them. Midstream, Quinn will hit herself in the face too, and while it makes me sad, she doesn't seem to mind too much.  The worst is when she scratches her little face. Poor babes with little motor control.

I keep Quinn probably too warm, but I'm getting better about it.  I would just hate for her to be cold, as I don't really like to be cold. But at night she is such a sweater. I feel bad when she wakes up because there is a little sweat spot on the sheet around her body.  I'm trying to keep the thicker blanket off her and just cover her with a sheet, since she also is wearing a sleeper. 

Nicknames: We call Quinn: Q, Quinny, Quinny-Pie, and Quinniper (I have a niece named Juniper, which is where it came from). Oh, and Little Farter.

[midstreammama]

He kids have come up with so many nicknames. Gillybop, gillypop, gillykins, silly Gilly, mr. Gills,..among soo many others.

Veritas, that's how I used to dress/care for Gilliam but he in no uncertain terms let me know about it. He will be 5 weeks on Sunday and I don't think he's worn anything but a onesie for at least half of that..lol. Such a shame because I have so many cute outfits but he gets so hot when wearing them.

[Veritas Vitae]

I'm so touched out. Quinn has been waking up each time I feed her and try to put her down, so I've had to hold her constantly. I've had the baby all by myself all week. I don't know anyone where I live and B is traveling each week. He was originally going to be gone for two weeks straight since his grandfather's funeral was this weekend in FL, but he decided to fly home as well, which is a lot of flying for him, because he had to fly from OK to FL on Friday, the FL to NC Saturday, and he is flying back out on Monday.  But I know he really wanted to come home and see us.  I hope he is up for taking Q from me. I feel guilty for wanting to just hand the baby over to him when he gets here, but I just really want to not have to hold her for a little bit.  It seems like such a bad thing for a mother to say.  

I was feeling kind of lonely today. I don't know anyone here, except for my mom, and my mom can't help with the baby, she can't hold her for that long and most likely couldn't watch her, although she says she could, but she has minor seizures, and can't drive.   So I decided to take Quinn for a walk downtown, just to get out of the house, and on the way home I stopped at the coffee shop and there was a young family there, and they had a baby boy, who turned out to be two months old. The mother complimented Quinn's diaper cover and asked what kind it was, she also cloth diapers, and then Quinn started fussing because she was hungry.  I hadn't brought a blanket with me to cover because I thought I was just going on a walk, and I had a t-shirt, not a nursing top on, so I was just paralyzed with what to do.  Do I feed Quinn there or take her home and feed her.  I kept telling myself I should just feed her there and try to talk to this lady, but I totally chickened out and left.  I must have seemed like such a weirdo snob, she tries talking to me and I just pack my baby up and leave.  I was kicking myself the whole way home and wishing I had stayed. I live in a really small town, what are the chances I'm going to run into another natural minded cloth diapering mom with a baby the same age as mine?

Quinn is fussing again...argh, I hope B gets back soon. Just needed to vent.  It's okay to feel like I don't want to pick her up right now, right?

ETA: I just found out he is not getting home until 9:30am...tomorrow morning, not tonight. I totally started crying when I found out.

Edited by Veritas Vitae - 10/6/12 at 7:36pm

[iixivboots]

Oh VV, I really feel for you. I have never been alone with Lyle that long. I really can't imagine it. Hopefully you will keep busy and 9:30 tomorrow will be here before you know it.

I totally get nursing in public anxiety, don't think of all the details, and end up going home. I'm getting a little better but it's totally normal, I think. I basically always make sure I have on something that can be pulled down so I can nurse, which has limited my wardrobe, ha.

[LilyTiger]

VV, I totally understand!  When DH was gone for three days when Piper was around 4 weeks (OMG!  Where has the time gone!) I cried the first night.  And when DH got home, I definitely just handed the baby to him.  It feels terrible, but you need a break.  My doctor made me feel so much better when she explained why we have that overwhelmed feeling.  She said it's essentially sensory overload.  We spend every day staring at these little creatures, listening for every noise, analyzing every facial expression, changing diapers, feeding, etc., that our brains literally shut down after a certain point.  Add in sleep deprivation and you have probably the hardest job in the world.  I'm so sorry B is away for so long.  It totally sucks.  But at least try to erase the guilt.  You absolutely need  a break from being an amazing mom in order to be an even more amazing mom.  I need an hour away from Piper every day just to re-energize, so I just hand her to DH when he gets home from work and go for a run or shower or just go stare at a wall.  No guilt at all.