I Feel Like a Planet « Back to Group Discussions

[Dia]

I just have to say to ladies who will (maybe) understand. 

It seems like overnight, almost literally, I went from looking pretty normal to super, huge-belly pregnant. I am a couple days away from 20 weeks with my first. 

That's only halfway!! I'm going to get way bigger! This is my first time - I'm afraid of the belly now!! 

Someone make me feel better about this please. 

[Imakcerka]

I can't even try to make you feel better.  The growing doesn't stop.

[Teles]

You'll probably consider yourself really small in comparison after baby is born?

I've just given in to the belly - whatever space baby needs to grow, she can take. The only battle I'm still fighting is against stretch marks. I don't have any yet and I'm doing whatever crazy tricks I read about to keep it that way.

[Brambleberry]

I didn't get stretch marks with DD.  And did NOTHING.  And I was pretty huge - she was 8.5 lbs and I'm only 5'2".  So there's hope.  

Also, re: the big belly, I've always felt like I'd rather be noticeably pregnant than just looking a little chunky.  I really got my wish this time, since I was noticeably showing by 14 weeks.  I think it's really beautiful to have the big belly, but I must admit there is a point where it crosses the line from beautiful to just "impressive".  I'm afraid I'm going to be quite impressive here pretty soon with the twins LOL.  But people are generally really nice to you when you get to that point.

[etsdtm99]

yes, the bigger you get, the more likely people will let you cut in line in the bathroom ??

i am feeling pretty huge and while i like to look pregnant (which i think is good, rather than just chunky), this week it started getting hard to bend over and that sort of thing.. and THAT sucks.. i have 3 kids to take care of and picking things up off the floor is going to be torture for the next 19ish weeks (i'm 21wks) ugh.

[kellybeth]

yeah, bending over feels weird, like all my insides and the baby are going moving, too. not used to that and i don't like the feeling.

i love my belly, i think it's amazing. every morning i wake up i just am amazed! there is a baby inside of me! this is my first baby, but definitely won't be my last.

just keep moisturizing! i slather myself in unrefined organic coconut oil twice a day. belly, boobs, butt, etc. feels great. especially in a completely dry/not humid climate.

[buko]

Stretch marks are overwhelmingly a genetic thing...  I am almost guaranteed to get them, because I have loads and loads of old ones just from puberty and a little adult weight gain (ironically, I get this from my dad, not my mom).  Other people will slather themselves with oils and potions and swear this is what prevented stretch marks...  But FTMP, those people never would have gotten them no matter what they did or didn't do.  Lucky %^$@%$@#!!! 

Not like moisturizing could hurt!  And it certainly feels good.  But there's been almost nothing that has shown any promise in clinical trials (and they've tested cocoa butter and all the usual suspects).  

There's basically exactly one thing that actually has a suggestive Cochrane Review...

http://www.amazon.com/Trofolastin-Anti-stretch/dp/B003Q3FPR6/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_nS_nC?ie=UTF8&colid=2T8YXEMK8UL9Q&coliid=I1Q58Y9QTQAFDS

But I had Dr. Mom look at the research (my mom is a semi-retired research MD-- used to be with the FDA), and she was very meh on it...  like MAYBE it MIGHT do SOME good.  If I can convince myself the ingredients are unlikely to be absorbed/harmful to baby, I might try it, but other than that I'm resigning myself as much as possible.

One thing I do know, that has been proven, and has "worked" for me, is that if you put Retin-A (tretinoin) on fresh red stretch marks, they will fade much more quickly.  Not be erased or anything, but at least fade to silver faster.  I'm not sure if Retin-A is contraindicated for breastfeeding, but if not, I'll be all over that after baby is here. 

AFAIK, BTW, most stretch marks don't happen until 35+ weeks.  But I could be wrong on that!   

[kellybeth]

yep, i am a lucky one and my mom, grandmother, etc. don't have stretch marks (7 kids & 4) so hopefully if i take care of myself i won't have to worry about it.

[loveandgarbage]

I felt like such the planet when I was pregnant with DS1.

As for stretch marks, I think it's mostly genetic, but it varies. Some women in my family get them and some don't. I didn't get any with my first (despite him being 12 lbs and me going from a size 0 to 12!) but got tiny ones around my belly button with DS2 who was much smaller and who I gained 20 less pounds with. They faded to almost invisible once my stomach went down. I'll probably pick up a few more this pregnancy.

I exfoliate and moisturize my belly like a madwoman with my pregnancies. I also treat my butt/thighs and breasts. I make a sugar scrub to use during showers and also use different belly creams-- sometimes just cocoa butter, but this time around I plan at some point to make my own whipped butter using shea and kokum. The best oils for skin regeneration are rosehip seed and borage. Those can be pricey though and also hard to find at stores. Other good oils for moisturizing are sweet almond, apricot kernal, hemp seed, avocado and evening primrose. If you just have olive oil on hand, that works, too! I haven't yet tried it (because it's so pricey) but I heard from a friend that helichrysum essential oil is amazing for fading and preventing scars. She used it religiously during her pregnancies, comes from a family who gets lots of stretch marks, and escaped with only tiny ones. Other good essential oils for skin regeneration are clary sage, lavender, carrot seed and rose geranium. I usually just add those to the sugar scrub.

All that said, stretch marks and loose skin are just part of being a mama. And I think that's beautiful and something to accept and celebrate.

[kellybeth]

helichrysum oil is great for reducing scars. i had a terrible accident and had staples and stitches across my hairline a few years ago, and i made up some scar oil to treat myself. didn't have insurance. the oil that worked best though was dragon's blood with vitamin e mixed in. you can still see the scar, but it's not noticeable. i had salons actually refuse to cut my hair because they were afraid of my head. i have no feeling in my head or face, anyway. but it was very hurtful. at least i look 'normal' now.

[HouseofPeace]

oh yes, we're at planet stage, and then you spend the next few months becoming monstrous!!!!

i got 5 tiny stretch marks w/ my first and didn't do much of anything.  none with my 2nd, and a diverse spattering w/ my 3rd b/c she stayed in sooooo long and was bigger.  i also inherited stretch marks from my dad.  that said, i gained between 35-40 lbs with each pregnancy, and gone from a size 6 to 14, and i get really really large.  

got a belly balm this pregnancy, and used cocoa butter for most of the others.    they're faint and my belly gets pretty smooth after babies, so i don't really worry about them now.  though i do moisturize for comfort and for spending time and energy focusing on baby.  

my husband loves this stage, partially b/c he knows it goes from cute and kinda bulby to 'large, in charge, and the size of a barge' (it's amazing he's alive sometimes) and just wait till you see what the rest of your body does.....  yeah.  pregnancy- it's cuter when it's shown by the media, or on anyone else.  i always just feel very fat, but i get used to it, especially since i spend a full 42 weeks pregnant with each.  every one then gives you strange looks and seems to want to shuffle you off to the nearest hospital to be cared for.  i always get a kick out of everyone telling me i'm going to pop any day when i'm only 6 months along.... this comes from the oddest people.  and teenage girls are always a bit scandalized by 9 month pregnant belly.  but seriously, if you watch a movie/tv show, they show women who looks about 6-7 months along popping out 14 lb babies!  it's not gonna be like that!

so- blessings.  and here's hoping you get more comfortable soon!!!

[eminvc]

Originally Posted by Dia 

I just have to say to ladies who will (maybe) understand. 

It seems like overnight, almost literally, I went from looking pretty normal to super, huge-belly pregnant. I am a couple days away from 20 weeks with my first. 

That's only halfway!! I'm going to get way bigger! This is my first time - I'm afraid of the belly now!! 

Someone make me feel better about this please. 

can't really make you feel better...I also feel like I just popped out quite a bit, and had two people yesterday tell me I look "huge!" I would think that with me expecting twins I'd get a free pass on some of these comments, but apparently not. Also a couple days away from 20 weeks.

emilyinvc

[Gray's Mommy]

I went out to a thrift store and found a few super cute tops that make me feel good about my planet belly. Wearing clothes that flatter instead of "tents" helps my self image and YES, I am vain. There is nothing worse than people still asking, "is she fat or pregnant?" at this stage. I'm 20 weeks currently.

[joyriders]

fyi, i get that changing bodies can be a mind-trip, but being fat isn't the worst thing in the world. i notice a lot of pregnant women making fat-phobic/body negative comments and it's disappointing. not just this thread or this board, so i'm not trying to single anybody out (in fact this particular thread overall isn't even that bad)...just a general PSA. for the record, i completely understand venting about physical changes when it comes to comfort, but not so much when it comes to appearance. every body is a good body and one can be healthy at any size. sweeping comments about fat equating with ugly or bad isn't a great attitude to perpetuate. just something to keep in mind.

[buko]

Thanks for adding that, joyriders.  I quite agree.

[HouseofPeace]

definitely a good call, joyriders!  i think a big struggle w/ pregnancy is learning to be comfortable, healthy, sexy and happy in a body that the media generally discourages for women!  

i think pregnancy is beautiful and amazing and that all sizes look great- but it is hard to mentally shift to realizing that love handles are necessary and healthy!!!  not to mention thighs and butt doubling in size.  thankfully we women can see each other's beautiful bodies and encourage each other to rejoice in the beauty they have.  

my husband once worked at a restaurant and a women came in with a half-unbuttoned (bottom half) men's shirt over a broomstick skirt and a big ole 8 month belly hanging out to order a burger w/ avocado and sweet potato fries.  when she left, his friend was like 'whoa, why would she go out like that?' and my husband (i was newly pregnant) came home and was like "whoa baby, you're gonna get big and beautiful!  she was so beautiful!"  

and all the bodies and women here are so beautiful!  you do have to realize your body will do pregnancy it's own way.  just like labor.  and just like the new person inside you will be totally unique as well!  

[loveandgarbage]

Originally Posted by buko 

Thanks for adding that, joyriders.  I quite agree.

Yeah that's a great reminder.

[Dia]

Originally Posted by joyriders 

fyi, i get that changing bodies can be a mind-trip, but being fat isn't the worst thing in the world. i notice a lot of pregnant women making fat-phobic/body negative comments and it's disappointing. not just this thread or this board, so i'm not trying to single anybody out (in fact this particular thread overall isn't even that bad)...just a general PSA. for the record, i completely understand venting about physical changes when it comes to comfort, but not so much when it comes to appearance. every body is a good body and one can be healthy at any size. sweeping comments about fat equating with ugly or bad isn't a great attitude to perpetuate. just something to keep in mind.

It is very sad when women make really negative comments about their bodies, especically when we are doing something as miraculous and amazing as carrying another life. Actually I see very, very little of that on MDC, which is pretty awesome. 

But also - this is hard. It feels hard to suddenly to be big. I hope its okay to talk about that here. I think we do a pretty good job of it. 

[Adaline'sMama]

This is my first time with stretch marks, and Im taking it pretty hard. I've looked at tons of pictures here:

http://theshapeofamother.com/category/belly/

And tried to remind myself that it's a ridiculous thing to be vain about. Im having a hard time buying the "I earned my tiger stripes" mentality, but Im trying. 

With my first, I was barely showing and then it all of the sudden looked like a basketball jumped under my shirt, so I know the feeling of going from zero to huge in a week :) It's hard to deal with. 

[Dia]

Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama 

With my first, I was barely showing and then it all of the sudden looked like a basketball jumped under my shirt, so I know the feeling of going from zero to huge in a week :) It's hard to deal with. 

Thanks :) That helps to hear.