Pendente Lite decision

[chefmommy]

So I finally received my pendente lite decision about 2 weeks ago. Gave me custody, CS, maintenance, part of my legal fees. There is a deadline for legal fees, but, no dates for anything else. When added up he owes me $15,000.00 not including what is due to lawyer. Lawyer was obtuse when I asked when I can expect him to pay me anything.More interested in patting himself on the back about the decision. Back to court in a few days to follow up on this decision. Why do we have to go to court for this? Is he ever going to have to pay me what he owes? 

[Goodmom2008]

Child support arrears, yes.  The courts will go after this more strictly than anything else.  Legal fees?  They won't garnish his wages, they won't take away his license.  But, if there are assets to be divided, you can ask for it to be paid out of his share of assets.  Which means you get more assets. 

Oh, and when you go back to court, ask that the support (both child support and spousal) be garnished from his wages with a percentage added on for the arrears.   I have a suspicion that if it isn't taken out of his check before he gets it, he won't pay.  And it is a hassle when someone refuses to pay what they owe. 

[tccandlsccmom]

First, CONGRATULATIONS on the great pendente lite order....though it seems the only fair thing, sometimes courts don't come out the right way.  As for the money, I concur with PP: other than the child support (and the part that has a deadline), you could be waiting a VERY long time.  Or (not to scare you, but...) - be faced with a filing of bankruptcy by him as I am, which for all but the child support may wipe out (under law) the tens of thousands my ex owes me...and potentially put me and the kids under.  I also agree with garnishment suggestion.  

[chefmommy]

Oh no - I feared he would file bankrupsy. He is in debt hundreds of thousands from gambling! So he would be off the hook for his share of childcare expenses, spousal support, etc??? 

[chefmommy]

Is there anything else I need to be ready for before court this week?

[provocativa]

I can't answer your question, but I would doubt that bankruptcy voids a child support debt.  Here it is pretty standard for cs to come out of wages, and garnishment is the standard and not a punishment.
 

[hillymum]

Just wanted to wish you goood luck and say keep us posted!

[Mama Soltera]

To be honest, this doesn't sound like a guy you'll ever be able to count on for spousal support. Going bankrupt will not allow him to get out of child support obligations (though he will likely try to get out of those too). Best of luck. 

[lilgreen]

Great outcome!!!  Sadly, one thing I'm realizing through this process is that it will never be really fair. I hope you're able to get steady money from him. I don't have any advice, but I wanted to say congratulations, regardless. There are many good things to celebrate. xo

[Goodmom2008]

Originally Posted by chefmommy 

Oh no - I feared he would file bankrupsy. He is in debt hundreds of thousands from gambling! So he would be off the hook for his share of childcare expenses, spousal support, etc??? 

Child care costs are considered part of child support and he cannot discharge what he owes you for that.  He also can't discharge spousal support arrears.  If you are planning on filing BK yourself (and this may be your only way out of paying off any debt that he has incurred that has your name on it, as well) it's a moot point as the BK trustee would get any assets that cannot be exempted.  Keep in mind, that support arrears may be exempt as it is support. 

[chefmommy]

Sorry I am not clear on this. If I decide to file BK - they can take the arears GM? Or they can't because it's exempt?   

[hillymum]

CM, my ex owes me loads of money (and I mean loads!) and was given a deadline to pay a chunk if it which is the end of this month. He was given 6 months to pay an told he would be going to jail if he didn't pay up. Well, he hasn't paid so my attorney put in a motion today that ex's wages be garnished for it as well as his bank account!  I really didn't believe I would see much of this money, but i guess I will. You will also get the money you are owed as long as he has a job. If he doesn't, then of cause that is a different matter.

[Goodmom2008]

Originally Posted by chefmommy 

Sorry I am not clear on this. If I decide to file BK - they can take the arears GM? Or they can't because it's exempt?   

It is possible.  The trustee can make the argument that the debt you borrowed (or acquired via the divorce) went to support the kids.  That is a question for a BK attorney. 

What the trustee can't do is garnish support.  That is exempt. 

And if your ex were to declare a chapter 13, the trustee can't disallow his support payments (he would also be required to pay the current amount and pay on arrears).  And any support arrears is given priority when the plan payments are made.  It would be good for you if your ex had to do a chapter 13.  You would get your money as long as he is in the plan.

[tccandlsccmom]

Legally, he can't get out of court-ordered support.  But if, like my ex, he is not working....well...  Also, I was not married but we were domestic partners, holding properties with joint and several liability...and if he is approved for bankruptcy, the over $300K in underwater amounts on the 2 foreclosed houses would transfer to me entirely...I suspect your situation is different....

Stay strong!