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October 7th Weekly Chat thread

post #1 of 55
Thread Starter 

Sending huge hugs to all the mamas who have been struggling this week, you have all been in my thoughts! We have come so far mamas, we are definitely in the home stretch now-just think in a few more weeks some mamas will likely be starting to have their babes!! You are all such a wonderful group and I hope that everyone is enjoying the happiest of Sundays (or Mondays to our Aussie pals <3 ) Hope all is well!! 

post #2 of 55

Speaking of struggles; How is anyone else? dealing with the issues of roids and swollen-heavy-crotch-feeling-making-peeing-difficult?   Tell me I'm not alone.

post #3 of 55
Yay, new thread.
post #4 of 55

Eminencejae, it sounds like you may want to check your symptoms against vaginal/labial varicose veins. I know it has a real name, but this baby has eaten my brain. A friend of mine had it this summer and needed a special support girdle, but felt so much better with it.

ETA: This is the hot little number my friend wore for most of her last trimester.
Edited by stegenrae - 10/7/12 at 4:28pm
post #5 of 55

Happy Sunday (/Monday) everyone! I'm feeling very split about where I stand in this pregnancy timeline. Half of the time I feel like it's almost over, and half of the time I feel like I have sooooo long to go! I suppose it's all relative to what else happens to be going on at that moment but mostly how I'm currently feeling about labor :)

All is well here, no hemorrhoids yet, but definitely slowing down on the ol' digestive motility, so I have a feeling that they are just around the corner. Eminencejae, I hope you're able to find some relief!

The teen daughter has reported that she and the older boy have mutually lost interest in each other due to their age difference. Whew!  I was starting to have she-hulk smash hormone induced visions of inflicting some serious physical harm on any one who would dream of taking advantage of her.  I guess that's the biggest pregnancy related issue at the moment--the irritability which blows up into full on rage over the silliest of issues.  And sooooo unpredictable.  Anyone else?  DH must have asked me 25 times minimum yesterday if I was mad at him, which I wasn't until he wouldn't quit bugging me about it.  And when people ask how I'm feeling I want to say, "bitchy and tired, duh." 

On a happy note, we've been able to sell some of our baby girl clothes to make room for this little boy.  Seriously. Cannot. Wait. To. Snuggle. Him.

post #6 of 55

Wow! Seriously, wasnt it just 2 days ago that i was writing that DarkBlue was a time lord and was eating the days away too fast?!?! Where are you hiding all these days to start new weekly threads?!?!?!?!


Yes to roids etc :( Lots of water and dried fruit has helped tho!


Esp- I cant wait to hold this little one!! I dont know who it is but I cant wait for that smell and warmth and weight of a newborn in my arms and on my chest! Sigh!!


AFM - its been uni holidays here so I have been chiling out :) LOTS of napping! LOTS of cleaning, sorting and organising! And now its the first day back and its only noon and I want to sleeeeeeeep!!!!

My Mother Blessing and Baby Shower have been all organised for a month from now :)))) For my Mother Blessing I am having people here and we are making a bedouin tent in the backyard and going to tell birth stories, henna my bump and eat a lot of water melon while making a birth bead necklace!!!!!!

Baby Shower- my sis is throwing it for me and its going to be fairly normal. Presents, cake, silly games etc.

I am just sooo looking forward to my Mother Blessing!!!!! WEEEEE!

post #7 of 55

I'm right there with you ladies on the holding baby. I can't wait either. Yesterday, I took a meal to my doula client who delivered two weeks ago and she was almost too much to take in. I told her if I wasn't pregnant already, DH and I would be having a talk.  Her baby was teeny tiny to me! She was around 8lbs yesterday, smaller than both my girls at birth. I can't wait. It does feel like it's so close, but two whole months away still! 

Stegan- we are here in Topeka and have been for the last two years. How long have you been in KC? Friday, I had to pick my sister up at Union Station but her train got in really late, so we tried out the Crown Center for the first time and had a blast. We did Kaleidoscope and Sea Life and then hung out inside the train station for a while before she finally got in. I was pretty proud of myself for doing it all without DH who was on a trip out east. 


AFM - DH just returned from a solo trip out east to present a paper at the conference on faith and history. That left me to solo parent for 4 days and the girls and I had a blast. I'll be hitting 8 months this week- how crazy is that? We had some cold weather over the weekend and it was amazing!! I'm finally in the fall spirit and it feels like time is moving again. My mom is working her last night tonight in IL and will be moving here in just about two weeks! I'm super excited, as we will actually have family here that I can rely on! 

post #8 of 55

Oh wow! Where has the time gone? 32 weeks on Wednesday. I have had a busy couple of weeks and have not checked in on the chat threads.


My hormones have been out of control lately! Super grouchy with the kids and my poor husband. And yesterday, I was checking Facebook, and there were 3 different updates from moms I know, with little ones under two months old, and all of them were talking about letting their little ones cry-it-out. One complained that her 4 week-old daughter was spoiled because she "knew" how to cry it out, but would settle down right away and fall asleep instantly if she picked her up. Another bragged that she had just gotten 8 hours of sleep after making her two month old boy cry it out the night before, for an hour. I was so mad and sad all at the same time! I complained to my husband but I didn't have the guts to talk to either of them about it or even post links to articles about the dangers of cry-it-out as my status. It put me in a sour mood the rest of the day so I made up for it by snuggling my 2 year old to sleep (thinking self-righteous thoughts all the while). Anyone else experiencing grouchy moods from little things that can go on to ruin your day?


Oh well, hoping for a happier week this week and just glad I have a community of like-minded mamas I can vent to when things like this ruin my day. :)

post #9 of 55

Hi everyone! My MW pointed out at our appt last Thursday that because of my different due dates, I am 'clear' to give birth at home anytime after November 20!!!! That's like, 6 weeks away!!!! Of course my boys have all been born with a couple days of their EDD's, so still likely to be more like 10 weeks, but still...


My hormones have been raging as well. One of the kids (not mine) in the house was really shitty to me on Friday - and still this morning I am unsure if I am willing to drive him to school today, b/c I can't handle his abusiveness (and unfortunately, in this case, it really IS abusiveness, learned from his oh-so-wonderful dad who has abandoned them once again....). I couldn't even talk to him on Friday night, and when it comes to kids I am usually the best at dropping the issue, talking to them about it, and having it be complete.


We re-arranged our bedroom yesterday, to make more space for the birth, it feels SO nice in there now, and with one small change may even be how we leave things after baby arrives. I also hung several of my favorite pictures of all of the kids (the 7 between us!) above my dresser, with some beautiful signs we have (one says LOVE, the other says something like, it's not where you are going but who is beside you that counts) - it will make a nice focal point for awhile, especially the pics of my boys as chunky babies, while I am breathing through contractions and wondering "Why am I doing this again???" lol.


Oh, and brother & I bought mom a plane ticket for when the baby is born - likely she will need to fly stand-by or pay a small change fee to get here at the right time, but at least I know there are plans for her to get here. My mom is a GOD-SEND in those first few days! She will clean EVERYTHING and make good food & hang out with the other kids a ton :)


Much love to you all - I'm off for a busy week this week :/ Gonna try hard to not over-do it!

post #10 of 55

I've been back home for about a week now and it's been great.  Actually had almost the whole weekend to just myself and DP and we worked out in the garden, cooked food, rearranged the house - even went out and listened to music with friends for a couple hours - and had lots of sex;) - it's been wonderful.  We'd been wanting to get this house changed around and it already has such a better, bigger, yet cozier/homier feel to it.  I feel really good about it.  We're here for a few more days and then back to Portland for our (hopefully) last week and a half stretch. 


I have a midwife appt. this afternoon with our "new" homebirth midwife - an old friend of mine.  I haven't been in to a midwife for a month and a half now and I'm eager to check in with someone.  I feel the babe move constantly, so that's not a worry, but I'm carrying so much differently this time around - more compactly I guess - that I feel almost small! - although from roughly measuring my fundal height - I think I'm measuring a few weeks ahead, as usual.  Anyway, it'll be nice to get in there and check in.


My tummy has been sooo itchy!  Anyone else?  I don't remember this so much either - just my skin stretching out I guess - time to drink more water.  And I have to pee all the time again.  Other than that, I'm feeling really great - and since I'm not quite as far along as the rest of you gals - I've still got a solid 3 months to go - which I'm more than happy about - lots of time to prepare still. 

post #11 of 55

I just realized something totally random as I was updating my signature. All 3 of the baby in utero "smileys" have breech presentations. I wonder why they don't have a head down baby to use in the count downs?

post #12 of 55
Gah! Computer just ate my long post! The short version: Kel, I'm so happy to hear you've had some time at home. Sego, I'm totally freaked out by how close that 'you can have the baby any time now at home' date is - I'm kind of ready at work but at home there is SO MUCH that must be done and SO LITTLE chance that it all will be, although I have been making good progress on the to-do list recently. DeeGee, I feel like my hormones have evened out some - only problematical if I am very tired, very hungry, or a little sick. Good for you for taking care of yourself first, though! AFM, I am trying to deal with the winter clothes everyone in my house needs - we are in pretty good shape for the kids from hand-me-downs. But I need more winter maternity clothes - and I wish I could find some in nice colors! All the ones I have are black, navy blue, tan, or red. I went to the thrift store today and got 4 items I do need and will use, but guess what colors they are, too?!?!? The sorting out of things has been challenging because my allergies are so awful. I had to take some Benedryl today, which I hate to do, but I felt like I was going to try to claw the itching out of the back of my throat otherwise, and probably stop being able to breathe, too.
post #13 of 55

Purposeful- How did I miss your mving plans?!?! sorry! Mind blank! Sounds like the move will bring you closer to a nice communiity tho :)


DeeGee- ah yes :(  Unforunately i have had to unfriend a few friends (in real life and on the net) as our views are starting to clash more and more! It wasnt a problem before we got pregnant but now its just too much to take- watching the smacking and the shouting and the crying it out... They just arent choices that we are making. And recently I had a friend say to me "Anyway I better get going. I still need to do the groceries and pick some stuff up before everything turns to shit again." Wanna know what he meant? His wife was due in a week with their second baby... And yes he really meant it like that. He didnt mean Chaotic or Sleep Deprved or Busy or Crazy. He meant SHIT. So much love for his unborn child! sigh!


Sego- So glad that your birth plans are coming together! It sounds like your mum is wonderful!! Can I have one lol!!! It sounds like you might need a break from the child that has been giving you a hard time. Im finding that I cant even watch negative TV shows or read negative books etc lately as I absorb too much of its bad energy. ??? Tell us more about your birth space!!! :)


Kel- YES TO ITCHY BELLY!!!! Something that I have found helped heaps is having a "milk bath".. well its not acutally a mik bath! You just soak uncooked oats in a bag/clean sock for a while then pull it out and squeeze the white juice over your belly. It has totally stopped all the itching for me! I usually have a bath and fill a big sock full of oats and squeeze it repeatedly into the bath and just chill :)


Mothership- Lol I think you are thinking too hard about the signature babies! But it is interesting!... Oh no! Now im paranoid LOL!!!


MamaBeakley- It sucks that winter colours are so subdued doesnt it! And I feel like the fact that they are maternity items make it even worse. I swear the only maternity clothes I have are black! At least I am going into summer here so colour is starting to come back... Have you thought about dying/beaching some fun pants/sweaters??


AFM- Things here are good. Lol it was meant to be first day back at uni yesterday but I stayed home and slept instead! And I am doing the same today! hehehe!

We have a midwife appt this arvo :) I cant believe they are down to every 2 weeks now!! Normally i feel like  have a billioon questions for her cos i normally dont see her for a few weeks. I feel like all I will have to say today is "So can we do it now?!?!" Lol im so exited!!!!!

Anyway i better be off! I may just go and wash some baby clothes!!!!!!!! FUN!!

post #14 of 55

Thank you everyone for your sweet responses in last week's thread! It's encouraging how little babies really need (and I know that, but it's still nice to hear it over and over). I'm in a much better place than I was last week, as we've adjusted to the idea that we might still be here a few more months. I've also taken a huge dive into knitting, which is helping with a lot of my "nesting" tendencies. We're still in flux and will be for a few more weeks, but I feel more rooted to DH and to being open to wherever we will be in this coming season. Hopefully it will give our little one a head start on being flexible and loving adventure! :)


Guys, not gonna lie, you're scaring me with the 'roids talk! For some reason the idea just freaks me out and I'm really hoping I can avoid them. 29 weeks and so far no swollen ankles, spider veins, etc...just getting real tired earlier in the evening. I have this lame throat/congested thing that's been going around as well, which stinks.


This past week was my first week not working and while it was actually quite busy, I feel sooo much more relaxed already. I feel so blessed to be able to transition to staying at home a little early, even if it's not quite how we planned it and we're living very cheaply so that we can do it. Speaking of cheap, my midwife hooked me up with a friend of hers and I got a tooooon of cloth diapers at wholesale price! I'm almost completely set now, so the only other things I feel like we "need" before baby comes is the Ergo and the Maya wrap, which I'll buy soon with shower money if no one else gets them. We got lots of clothing and swaddles and other cute things at my wonderful shower last week, and it was a great reminder of the community I have here, which I'll miss very much but also enjoy still being a part of if we're still around for the birth. 


The last thing I'm having to work on letting go of is my dream of a homebirth. At this point, if we are still here, we will be staying temporarily in someone else's house, and I am pretty skeptical that any of them will be up for me having my birth there. There is a birth center in town and I will feel comfortable there, especially since my friend/midwife will still do our delivery (as long as the baby doesn't decide to come while she's out of town for a few days around Christmas). Still, it's a place we'll have to go to and leave, and it's not "home"--but wherever we are won't really be home anyway. I'm coming to terms with it and am so glad that the birth center is there (it's less than a year old and my only other option would be an hour away), but I would be so excited if it worked out that we could stay with someone who wouldn't mind us having the birth in their place (or even better, if we still make it to Wales, where I can homebirth in my own, actual home).


stegenrae, whoaaaa--I've seen the pregnancy belts but that thing is in a whole 'nother realm! yikes!


segolily, love hearing about the room-rearranging. Maybe we should start a "space for baby" thread? I'd love to see photos of your space (also because I'm particularly interested in small spaces right now).


purposefuldoula, that's incredible that your mom is moving to town! What awesome timing -- I bet you will be loving it as you'll have lots of support in those early baby days.


kel, so glad to hear you're home and getting closer to being settled in one place! Your time with your DH sounds lovely as well, so nice to be able to do things together after these tough past few months.


travelmumma, isn't sleep the best? Some days I just want to alternate sleeping and long baths and do nothing else! Lol! I suppose we'd best get it in now while we still can!

post #15 of 55

chica, I'm glad you have the birth center to go to if you're not in Wales already when babe decides it's time to meet you. My oldest was born at a birth center, and while it's not "home," it certainly affords the privacy and respect you deserve but can't really get at a hospital. 


travelmumma, LOL at sleeping in and skipping class! I'm jealous; I'd loooove to nap. As it was today, I slept in a bit too long (just.couldn't.get.out.of.bed) and we were playing catch-up all day around here. We are all fighting a cold with cough, so maybe that's what had me down for the count this morning.


mamabeakley, yay for making some headway on your home to-do list. Sorry about the allergies, though--that just sucks. Knock wood, mine haven't been as bad as I remember my fall allergies having been in the past (...so far?). 


themothership, I hadn't noticed that about the in utero smilies here, but had noted that the babycenter app on my phone had a breech baby up until 28w, I think, when they finally flipped that babe into vertex.


kel, So happy for you that you got to reconnect with DP and take care of some nesting at home. I hope the next week and a half in Portland goes smoothly for everyone and you are back home for good in no time.


segolily, I hope your week flies by with much productivity and little effort. And that the kiddo giving you hell gets his head straight. 


DeeGee, count me among the raging bitches right along with you. Sorry your fb people are causing you grief. Is it worth unfriending or blocking them? If not, I make liberal use of the "hide posts..." option. 


esp, see note to DeeGee above re: bitchiness. ;)


purposefuldoula, I've been in KC since 2001. It really is a wonderful place to have a family--LOTS of family stuff to do, much of it free or cheap. (even more if you can afford not-cheap, but that's not me, lol.) Congrats on the 4 solo days going so well! We are now in the thick of dh's travel, and I do admit that sometimes, it's really smooth sailing without him. Except when it's not--and that's my fear when he's gone soooo much lately. Your day at Crown Center and Union Station sound fun...but tiring! You remind me that our annual pilgrimage to the holiday stuff at those locations will be exhausting and uncomfortable for my nearly-term self! :P


AFM...mentioned above, fighting off a cold and cough which (FX!) doesn't seem to be the kind that will turn into my usual 7-months-pg bronchitis ritual. My body has been pretty achey lately, but I haven't been adjusted in nearly a month because we've been so dang busy. DH leaves before I wake up tomorrow morning for New Mexico for 2 days, then we all leave Thursday for a wedding (I still have to get the boys socks and a belt for the 4yo) across the state. I need to paint my toenails for that--so that won't be really fun to do. The boys and I are skipping the rehearsal and dinner (at a restaurant that doesn't do GF, so we can't even eat anyway) and will hang out all day at the hotel we booked with an indoor pool, so that is my consolation prize. It occurred to me last night that I don't have any place to put baby stuff in our bedroom (we moved it from where it was when the boys were wee), and then I started kind of overthinking it today. I *did* manage to clear out almost all of the boys' clothes and shoes my younger son has outgrown, donating most to a swap at my church and a lot to a friend who had thought she was finished but had her 3rd boy on Oct 1st. I kept some unisex stuff and some boy things I'm just not willing to give away in case we have another and it's a boy--but that's not a huge box, and DS2 is in 4/5's, so that's saying something for my packrat self! I organized and boxed what baby stuff we have right now, too. I have two friends interested in buying my medium fuzzibunz, so we may yet end up with prefolds. (indecision much?) 

post #16 of 55

Hey, everybody. Kel, I'm so glad you checked in and that things are going well. I'd been wondering about you. All, I really enjoy reading each of your updates and getting a glimpse into your lives. One of the things I really treasure about this group is the sort of collective pregnancy consciousness that we seem to all be tied into as we pass through the weeks. It's nice to feel connected to you :)


I've been feeling really drained this past week. All I've wanted to do is sleep. I'm trying to be more diligent about my iron since I'd been slacking a bit there. (That would also explain the twitchy, restless legs at night.) I'm not uncomfortable, just tired. Ok my belly is tight and itchy...and I do feel heavy and slow by the end of the day...but nothing hurts really...ok except my left hip when I wake up...but other than that I'm good ;) This lethargy is hard to understand. Oddly enough, at night I'm sleeping better than I have in weeks. DS is in school all day. I work from home. So why so exhausted? Probably it doesn't matter WHY as long as I recognize it and allow myself the rest I need. But that's come with some guilt about not doing enough for my family and for work. So it goes. In brighter news, the CDs I ordered arrived. It was sweet to fold up the NB prefolds and tuck them into the soakers I've made. Everything's so tiny! I forget just how little they are at first. 


I was thinking the other day how crazy it is that baby is probably already about 3 pounds. That was crazy right there. And then to think that they're going to double or triple in size in the next couple of months, also crazy. Were so close to holding babies in our arms, and we've come so far from the double pink line on the HPTs.

post #17 of 55

Nice to get back online and see what you all are up to as well!  We just haven't had internet back home for most of the time we've been back - which is nice in many ways.  My appt was good yesterday - the midwife was able to easily feel babe's head in head down position and DP got to feel it, too - her head is so big already!  I'm measuring about 4+ weeks ahead, as usual, so I guess I'm/we're not small after all;)  Just carrying differently this time around. 

post #18 of 55

Hi everyone! So a quick update before I take off to spend the day with DS2 & get a massage (yay for prenatal bliss!!!): The kiddo I wrote about yesterday is going to spend 2-3 months with grandma in Washington State. Probably not how I would have handled it if he were mine, BUT I feel hugely relieved - I feel like I spend 1/3 of my time around him enjoying him, 1/3 protecting myself, and the other 1/3 protecting DS3 (6yo). I have SO much compassion for the whole situation with his dad, etc, but honestly, it has gotten to a point that it isn't healthy for him to continue his abusiveness, and the therapy he has been getting hasn't seemed to be helping at all. It is an interesting testament to the nature/nurture conversation - all 4 of her kids were exposed to dad's abusiveness, and he is the only one who ended up picking up the behaviors. He is the 2nd kid, too.


I don't have time for too many personals, BUt:

kel - I am SO glad you got to spend some time at home & with DH!!! Seemed MUCH needed!


Travelmumma - I have lost friends over the years, too. It can be hard, but honestly when, for example, one of Craig's life-long friends had kids & started telling us how GREAT the Ezzo books were... Oh, and how he 'made' his wife stop nursing so they could go together on his work trip to Hawaii when the baby was 8 weeks old (I was there nursing my then 18 month old, she cried the WHOLE time), you just wonder if this is really the kind of person you want to be around, you know? Yeah, they used to ski together & rock climb together and all... but neither of us was interested in being around someone who is treating other human beings like that. period. You make new friends ;)

post #19 of 55

Hey mamas - time is flying here for me! Being due at the beginning of the month, I have 2 more weeks before I could have HB (in Oregon the earliest is 35 wks)! Really going that early is not likely and I really don't want that. A 35 week baby is just not "cooked" yet! I'd rather go for 38 wks minimum. But the reality is that I'm so not ready and it is likely that it will be more like 7-10 weeks wow! I had 7-12 weeks here, then I did the math, 43 weeks is 10 weeks away! OMG. Reading through everyone else's posts made me think how I should set a deadline of sorts to be mostly ready - at least have the room where I'm going to set up the tub ready. We have to do some cleaning out and moving around of furniture. It think by the end of the month, which is about 36-37 weeks would be a good goal. As for work, I'm down to 18 working days (I work 3 days/wk) until my leave starts! That's insane!


No hemorrhoids here, but my whole vulva is sore a lot. I think it stems from the pubic bone, but it is more than just the joint. My chiropractor has been working on it, but so far not much long term relief. I might have to get one of those belts!


I got a cold this weekend and the coughing and sneezing is horrible. It hurts my abdomen and ligaments and then often if I'm not holding and squeezing from the outside, I pee. lovely. Now the cold has moved to be more congestion and less coughing and sneezing which is better in that sense!


Mamas, I get sad hearing about your mama blessings. I really want a mama blessing, but I feel like I don't have anyone to plan it for me. My close friends are just too busy with other things to pull it together it seems. It is wrong of me to plan it for myself? I have a baby shower, but I've always looked forward to a mama blessing...


Ok, sorry I don't have it in me for personals. You all are in my thoughts and I read them all!

post #20 of 55

Hi everyone! Just wanted to respond real quick and give updates...


Ouch! I didn't even know swollen vulvas occured. I guess that's something that women don't openly talk about? To everyone having hemorrhoids, swollens vulvas, and, well... all things swollen -- Birth will reverse it all and we'll all be happily snuggling our sweet babes.


I've had to unfriend a few people in real life and old friends on Facebook as well. Children aren't "2nd class citizens", and often times they are treated as such. There are family members I don't care to speak with, because they are just toxic...


Travelmumma - I have to be careful what I watch on TV as well. Being pregnant makes me super sensitive, and things that have been triggers for anxiety (abuse survivor here) in the past are relived. I can hardly watch the news anymore.


32 +2 weeks here! We are slowly gettting ready for baby and I feel like we're not moving fast enough!!! GAH! I don't even have our co-sleeper set-up yet, because I let a friend borrow it and they are now on vacation. And apparently they broke a wheel on it, and I need to order stackers... Not too worried about it YET. We are slooly transiting my DS to his room own bed. So far, so good. He is transitioning a lot easier then my girls did.


Can I brag? I'm feeling very accomplished today... I cleaned 2 bathrooms, mopped floors, and still got all the everyday cleaning, schoolwork and meals cooked today. Tomorrow I plan on purging 2 closets and reorganizing our upstairs hallway, which doubles as a homeschool/reading area. Yeah, I might be nesting. And it's driving me bonkers that I can't crochet a blanket! lol


Harmony - Are you originally from the DFW area? You're name sounds so familiar...

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