Weekly Chat Oct. 14th-20th « Back to Group Discussions

[jodieanneanton]

Hope you all are doing well, ladies! :)  Let's chat!

[jodieanneanton]

maydaymom10- I hope you are recovering from the marathon birth!  Hopefully if you are called for the other woman, her labor will be short and sweet!!! :D

Granolamama09- I hope all goes well on Monday with the divorce proceedings.  I am sorry that you have to deal with that drama while pregnant.  

chocolatechip- A meeting with other mamas with kids who are/will be close in age to yours sounds great.  Glad you had a good time talking baby with them! :)

Linnaea- I like your view of the "karma balance" concept.  Good and bad things happen to all people in different proportions.  'Take things as they come' has worked for me.  Each of my kids was different.  One seemed easier than the other in certain ways and then there were other ways that the other seemed easier.  Really, all kids are just different.  I can't wait to see how different this one is!

Melany- Your poor DH!  Something similar happened to DH b/c our 2nd was a happy but silent projectile spit up baby.  lol. 

babytoes- I am still on the lookout for that tea! ;)

spughy, sctuffy too, LightForest, cabbitdancer, writermama, and everyone else, 

AFM- Nothing much going on with me!  The weather was BEAUTIFUL today.  One of the very few days that I could call 'perfect' weather-wise.  I won a photosession through a contest on Facebook (who knew those things are actually real!?!!?  I never won anything like that before!) The photographer was someone I went to high school with.  She is was sooo sweet with my girls and I have no doubt that with the changing leaves and two beautiful photo subjects (my dd's if I do say so myself) the photos will turn out beautifully. 

Yesterday, I threw a halloween party and my two dressed up as dorothy and the scarecrow from wizard of oz.  I had fun (and gained maybe a few grey hairs) making their costumes for the occasion.  And everyone had fun at the party.  

I have to get some dental work done this week which I am not looking forward to, but have to do sooner or later, so may as well get it done now.

Now much new on the baby front.  I am feeling kicks and squirms pretty regularly now, so that is good and next week, I will probably get my u/s.  Looking forward to seeing a 100% perfectly healthy baby.  I had a dream that the gender (a boy) was accidentally revealed to us through the u/s, so I am hoping that doesn't happen for real.  Although now I feel like I already *know* what it is!  :)

Hope you all have a fabulous week!!!

[writermama12]

Jodie,

Those costumes are the cutest!! You really are talented at sewing. I hope to one day sew...anything. I have only sewn wool stuffed cloth balls and a wool-stuffed strawberry just to try out the machine. I am going to start working on a winter coat expansion panel so that I don't have to buy a whole new coat. I will post about it the craft thread. The pattern is pretty cool.

On another note, I am in work mode! I wrote and wrote all weekend to turn in a first full draft of my thesis project for grad school and I am sooooo happy to say that I am almost done! I can't believe I did it. Pregnant and chasing a toddler is not a great atmosphere for thesis writing but I did it anyway, even if it isn't quite as grand as I'd like it to be. A Master's is a Master's, you know. 

Next week, smooth sailing and lazy days as I soak up the fact that I will have no mandatory writing to do. ahhhh. 

[GranolaMama09]

Jodie - those costumes are too cute!  I'm glad they had a good time at your party.  Some of my fondest memories are of the Halloween/Haunted Houses we did as children with my parents!!   Eek to the dental work though!  I hope it goes smoothly.

WriterMama - that's fantastic!  GO YOU!!

AFM- Well, we just sent DP's kids back to their Mom's.  Divorce proceedings are tomorrow.  Let's see what new insanity she comes up with next.  (Thursday it was we were trying to kidnap the children.  *rolls eyes*)  Her latest insanity has at least gotten DP to stop being friendly towards her - in fact for him, he's being downright cold!  (No worries, he's polite and civil in front of the children.  There's just no more joking/teasing/free information sharing about stuff that's not directly concerning her or the children.)  I'm praying tomorrow brings final divorce papers the way they should be written so we don't have to worry about her stupid crap anymore.  

DSS told me this morning, 'you're kind of like DSD's Mom, too.  In fact, you're kind like my Mom too."  I assume this is stemming from our short conversation about calling Phoebe 'step'sister on Thursday night.  I told him that I'd like him not to use that word, that DD is just as much his sister as DSD and he should treat them the same.  That we're all his family.  Considering he's notorious for telling people I'm 'just Dad's roommate' I about started crying all over him when he said that.  However, the first words out his mouth to his mother were that DD and I were apart of his family now.  I'm sure that'll go over well.  In fact, DD was talking about going to the doctor with us and he asked when the next appointment was for the baby.    Unfortunately, we won't be able to go with our original plans because of ex but we asked if he would like us to pick him up from school that day and take him for ice cream or something so we could tell him the baby's gender and show him pictures of baby and he excitedly said yes.  He's even talked about baby a few times with the girls.  I think we're making some break throughs there!  YAY! 

On the baby front we've gotten one good solid kick in response to DP's voice but we're back to little wiggles and thumps.  I'm so anxious for those constant kicks!!!!  I've been having horrible nightmares of late and those kicks would help ease those fears some.

[scruffy too]

Jordie - GREAT job sewing - I especially like the scarecrow's pants!!

WriterMama - AWESOME about the Thesis - it must be such a relief to get the first draft done.

Granola - Best of luck tomorrow!  I went through divorce and child custody court with DP last year but the frustration is still fresh in my mind!  Stay strong and don't take anything personally!! 

As for me: I'm really grumpy the last two days.  I'm pretty sure DP and DSS are doing EVERYTHING possible to piss me off (obviously not really, but it sure f*cking feels like it!!!!!) 

[spughy]

Jodie those are adorable costumes!!!

From the previous thread (let's see if I can fake a quote here), from cabbitdancer:

[quote]maydaymom, I was very nervous about the potential to have a girly-girl as I, myself, am not, but I've discovered, having HAD the girly-girl after all, that it's not that big a deal. I'm really enjoying the frills and the dresses and the nail polish and the princesses and Ponies, because they're tempered with a love of scary things, and the outdoors, and "bad guys," bugs, snakes, frogs, fishing, etc... My daughter is awesome, in every respect, and she has taught me that being a girly-girl doesn't mean that her loves have to stop at pink and frills and girly things. :)[/quote]

Yes. this.  My girl went through a big pink frilly phase and spent six months one time pestering me for the girliest fairy costume in the world.  BUT she is also very into survival shows, nature documentaries, dinosaurs, bugs, snakes, hunting... sure, she likes to dress well and she pays a LOT of attention to what she puts on in the morning, but the girly-frills are gradually changing into more sophisticated-feminine as she gets older. And at last she understands that if she's planning on going to the beach to play with slime and sea creatures, the prettiest dress in the closet is not the best thing to wear.

I'm not a girly girl either, but I distinctly recall days when I was a child that involved stomping around in the woods shooting things with my dad in the morning and long sessions with my Barbie makeup in the afternoon.   And I turned out ok.  (Mostly. LOL.)

We are back in reno hell here after finishing our kitchen a while ago.  The break was nice while it lasted, but DH has now ripped out a section of the wall in the living room to access the area under the stairs.  We're putting in a new, smaller hot water heater in order to free up enough space in our coat closet to turn it into a small half-bath (sink and toilet).  It is a fairly large job and will likely take until the baby is born (or after) to be done, because DH is the most perfectiony perfectionist on the planet.  I wish I was exaggerating, but I'm not.   His first task is apparently to replace the two half-inch pipes that come out of the main water pipe coming in to our unit with 3/4 inch piping, because the main pipe is 3/4 inch and the water balancing between the main floor and the second floor is not perfect as a result.  The only real consequence of this is that the shower will occasionally run cold if someone runs hot water in the kitchen while you're in it, but this apparently IS grounds for shutting off the water for our whole entire building - 9 units - in order to "fix" it.  Sigh.  Never mind it's been like that for 30 years without real issue and it's like that in every single other unit in our complex... nope, it's gotta be done.  This is why projects that could be done in a week by a contractor take 6 months... but, then again, the perfectionism comes in very handy when it's a job like laying the tile in our kitchen, which was super-finicky and now looks stunning.  Because it IS perfect.

[chocolatechip]

jodie, those costumes are adorable!!!

maydaymom, congrats on your baby girl! I don't have any kids to talk about, but I was a girl who used to judge the quality of a skirt by how much it twirled, and I did a bunch of acting in plays and dance and then synchronized swimming between about ages 6-13, all of which required lots of make-up, costumes, hair done, etc. Maybe that was enough to satisfy me, because at the same time I liked playing sports with my dad and brothers, running around camping, and so on. In my later teenage years, I went way more grunge than girly, and it wasn't until I hit my twenties that I decided maybe I wanted to try wearing some fitted clothing.  Then I went and became an archaeologist, and have spent all manner of summers running around in uninhabited wilderness areas surveying and excavating, and bathing maybe once a week! So who knows what'll happen.

I would recommend, however, for anyone having a girl, to watch the documentary Miss Representation. It's a pretty powerful statement on what pressures girls (and women) are operating under in this day and age. And left me with some good ideas about the kinds of things I would want to emphasize to our daughter if we have one.

writermama, good for you! I can't imagine being in grad school and parenting or being pregnant (or both!) at the same time. In fact, I very intentionally waited on the having kids part until I was done with my dissertation!

granolamama, so happy that your step kids are having these conversations with you, and that you're all growing closer! Hooray!!!

I had a weird night last night, with several totally different dreams that all ended up with me incredibly frustrated or sad about something and having huge crying fits. Kind of left me in a strange mindset this morning, trying to clear out those feelings and remind myself it wasn't real. Anyone else having crazy pregnancy dreams?

[cabbitdancer]

I broke a tooth, last night! AAAARGH! I'm supposed to see the dentist, today, but this happened when I was pregnant with my daughter, too, and the tooth eventually wound up requiring a root canal. I had so hoped I would be able to avoid this sort of stress, this time around. :P

[spughy]

Originally Posted by chocolatechip 

I had a weird night last night, with several totally different dreams that all ended up with me incredibly frustrated or sad about something and having huge crying fits. Kind of left me in a strange mindset this morning, trying to clear out those feelings and remind myself it wasn't real. Anyone else having crazy pregnancy dreams?

I had a dream last night that my nipples were falling off.  Like, detatching from my breast tissue.  It was seriously disturbing and disgusting.

cabbitdancer, that sucks about your tooth.  Hope you can avoid a root canal this time.

[kellykins]

Cabbit- that totoally sucks. Im so sorry, tooth stuff ooks me out.

totally OT, and sorry if I am worng... but Cabbit...cabbit as in ryo-ohki from Tenchi?

[Chapsie]

ok, I have to share with someone.  I just found out that the unit I work in (I've been a newborn nurse for 5 years) is considering going from 8 hour shifts to 12 hour shifts. I currently work 3p-11p.  Due to seniority, I may be forced to work 7p-7a.  I don't know how this is going to work.  My husband works full time, so that means I'll be up ALLLLLL night working and then up all day with my kids (unless we do daycare so I can sleep.... ridiculous).  I have always loved my schedule.  One of the parents is always home with the kids except for 2 hours a week.  It has always been great.  I can't believe it can all change just like that!  I know that working longer hours will lead to poor sleep and poor eating habits which is not good with a new baby on the way.  

A little nervous!  

[spughy]

Oh, Chapsie, that's not fun.  Are you part of a union? Are they ok with this?  I'm guessing longer shifts means fewer shifts, is there some way you can tweak that so you can minimize the impact on family life?

In some good news, I called my mw this morning because I hadn't heard anything results-wise from my NT scan and bloodwork - that was because it all came back negative, so I'm in the "low risk" category for genetic abnormalities.  WHEW!

[jodieanneanton]

Chapsie-  That really stinks!  I have no advice... just commiseration.  I once had a job change things up on me like that.  I had no kids at the time, but it forced me to leave that job so I could keep my second job.  Really no fun.  Well, from your description, it sounded like the concept was still in the thinking stage.  Perhaps if they hear enough "uproar" from employees, they will reconsider.  12 hours is too long for anyone to work in a row IMO.  Good luck and hopefully it doesn't come to fruition.

[scruffy too]

Spughy - what a horrible dream!  Thx for sharing

Chapsie - I currently work 12 hour shifts and love them.  But I don't children [yet].  Some people love them, some hate them.  My partner recently went to longer shifts (around 10.5 hrs/day) and he's still not a huge fan.  It is a pain to co-ordinate childcare when we have DSS.

[cabbitdancer]

kellykins -- lol. Yes. I was really into ryo ohki when I was in college and a friend gave me a nickname regarding cabbits and it's kind of stuck. It's really hard to get rid of those old moniker's, y'know? ;)

Chapsie -- I couldn't imagine pulling a 12 hour shift and then taking care of the kids. That really sucks. I hope you can find an equitable solution.

AFM -- I had to get a crown put on, this afternoon. My dentist was really good about the pregnancy: no xrays, and an anesthetic that would be easier on my body. Even though it aches a little, right now, I still have to say that my pocketbook hurts more, but at least it wasn't a root canal. It was actually my first crown (my root canal was on a tooth that didn't require a crown at the time), so it was an interesting learning experience. And, yes, I am one of those weird people who is actually fascinated enough by this sort of stuff that it doesn't squick me as much as it probably ought. ;)

[Melany]

I'm not sure which thread I saw this on, but someone mentioned something along the lines of putting your baby in the cute things while they are a baby because they will have no opinion. I should have taken a photo of my 6 year old who dressed herself this morning. Shorts, knee high pink socks with a Christmas theme (where did she get those??) and a long sleeved Christmas shirt. Very cute and she made me think of the roller derby girls, but the shorts weren't ok considering it is COLD out this morning. She then asked me why she couldn't wear her shorts since they were in her dresser. Darn logic, she had a good argument. We have an agreement that anything in the bottom drawer is fair game for school, so I "should" have removed the shorts from her dresser since it is too cold for them. She gave me quite the lecture. Anyway, it got me thinking about how much easier it was to grab a baby outfit that they didn't care about.

[Melany]

Chapsie: So sorry to hear about the possible work schedule change. That is a LONG day. Do you end up with a few more days off in a row if they change it like that? For example, is it going to a 4 day work schedule instead of a 5?

[jodieanneanton]

hehehe!  Melany- That is sooo funny about your dd.  My 5 yo dd is very similar.  She picks out the most *interesting* outfits sometimes claiming they match because there is one color in common.  Nevermind that the skirt is yellow, pink, and purple butterflies and the top is black and white stripes with a pink bow on top... "Yes they do match!  They both have PINK, mom!!!"  

I had my second night of 10+ hours of sleep.  Going to bed with the kids and waking up with them has been good for reenergizing, but my poor DH is so lonely.  And tonight, he has to go to bed early and I am not quite sure I will be able to sleep at 8 pm again!  ;)

[cabbitdancer]

I love seeing the fashion choices my daughter makes. There are definitely days that I have to ask her if that is REALLY what she wants to wear. Melany, I totally get the drawer thing. I MADE SURE, this fall, that all the warmer weather wear was removed from my daughter's drawers as soon as it started getting cold out, because my daughter is the same way: if it's in the drawer, it's fair game!

jodie, I was SO EXHAUSTED my first trimester that I was trying to sleep about 10 hours every night and yeah, my husband got lonely, too. And then he found a new game on the computer and now I'm lucky if he comes to bed before 3 am. :P

[spughy]

Melany I'm sure we've had EXACTLY the same conversation here.  Knee-highs (I think they were her thick smartwool ones - pink with skulls) and really short shorts.  On a chilly day. 

Jodie, I go to bed around 9 every night.  DH can deal.  I have to get up at 7 and make breakfasts and lunches and get people organized.  And I typically also have to get up 2-3 times a night to pee, and then now that's waking up the baby and when I go back to bed there's the 20 minute party-in-my-uterus so it's harder to get back to sleep.  So I need those 10 hours in bed, for sure.

I *really* have to hit the sewing machine today and hem all the hand-me-down jeans and cords and yoga pants I have - I'm totally abusing the wonders of double-sided fashion tape but it makes a bit of a mess when I forget to remove it before I throw things in the wash.  I also want to maternitize a couple skirts.  And I still have couch cushions to fix... and DD's Halloween costume to do... I wish I liked sewing a bit more!  I'm unfortunately pretty competent at it but I'm not a huge fan.