It's definitely growth spurt time! We cluster feed and then pass out like we're drunk around here. H is 3w4d right now...
Weekly Chat for October 15th - 21st - Page 3
Ember is doing great. She occasionally gets a bit fussy but is fairly easy to console. She sleeps pretty well and eats great. I love the little rolls she's getting!
Libido - I'd be up for it but bleeding hasn't stopped yet and I'm not totally confident my tear has healed up well enough either. With my first, I bled until about seven weeks so there could still be a ways to go.
Birth control - I can't decide what to do there either. With my first LAM / NFP was very successful but Ember is a better sleeper than Sylvan was anytime during her first year so I'm not sure I trust it. But, I hate condoms, the pill sucks and I don't love the idea of an IUD. I suspect we are likely done having kids and DH will get a vasectomy but I don't want to rush into anything permanent until we're totally sure.
Bottles - we never introduced one to dd1, and it never bothered me not to be able to leave her for long. We may try one with Ember when she's a few months old. I wouldn't mind being able to leave her for a couple hours so I can spend some one on one time with my eldest but if it doesn't happen it's not a big deal.
OK, let's see if this will even post before I take any more time typing...
(blowing off steam here, feel free to ignore)
my daughter gave up her first ever for-real smile TO MY MIL yesterday, within about 45 minutes of meeting her. logically, it was basically a matter of right place/right time/novel face/attention paid but.. i was totally and sincerely heartbroken. definitely shed secret tears over feeling robbed of that moment. i got my own smile today and will obviously get many many more, which would help if this weren't about pure raw feeling, but significant milestones emotional mama omgwtfwaaaah.
and then i had to spend the rest of the day trying in vain to convince her that the baby's head will not fall off her shoulders if i don't have it in a vise grip at all times/that the hair she was born with falling out doesn't mean something's wrong with her/that crying until she gets what she actually wants even if it's not what you want her to want doesn't mean something's wrong with her/that her being small doesn't mean something's wrong with her/that her being a frequent nurser doesn't mean something's wrong with her OR me.
she brought breakfast up this morning and told me that she googled all that stuff last night and hey guess what? NOTHING'S WRONG WITH THE BABY. (ya think?) today r. has been sleeping a lot so she's apparently "behaving well." because of course, a good baby is an unconscious baby..?
(i can't imagine what would happen if i had a MIL that was actually bad, instead of just wrong and annoyingly paranoid.)
cloth diapers/wipes- my girl communicates very clearly about what she's into and what doesn't do it for her, and she is not happy about GMD prefolds. has anyone else had this experience? is it just a matter of getting used to them since she's used to really trim disposables? even if it is, i'm wondering if it's better to wait maybe a week or two more and try again, since the bulk just might be too much on her narrow frame.. thoughts?
also, wipes- we have been using these, at least, from day one, and i've got cloth wipes turning slightly blue. my solution is just tap water with kissaluvs DLP; we wash every other day with charlie's soap and combine the wipes with other baby laundry including the wet bag. does this blue staining sound familiar to anyone? (there aren't a lot of blue onesies or anything like that.)
katt -- I envy your ambition for sewing/yarn arts. I've stepped foot in my sewing room exactly twice thus far and I've made a shirt for Leo and a hoodie for him as well. That's all. I'm *hoping* to do a good handmade Christmas (I do it every year), but my babies have all been a bit older by this point (three in March, one Christmas Eve, but I got stuff done before she was born!). I have good ideas, so I'll reallllllly try to get stuff going early this year and maybe get it all done!
And on the lines of sewing, I made so many new diapers for Leo before he was born, but only in the newborn size... and he's growing so fast that I can *barely* get him into the Very Baby XSs that we have (they are definitely the smallest diapers we have... other than the one VB AIO XS, it's even a more snug fit, I think!). I need some new small diapers (too many hand-me-downs and some of the smalls we have are shot)... I *could* get by with lots of prefolds... and I do adore the prefolds we have (they're so broken-in that they're wonderfully soft!!), but I like to have some good fitteds as well. I'd like to sew up at least a half-dozen. If I plan well, maybe I can get them made before they're ABSOLUTELY needed! ... oh, and some more covers too. Covers probably take priority since they can be used with prefolds as well. (I do have quite a few Bummis small covers, but I prefer more elasticized leg openings just in case a crazy huge poosplosion occurs).
Ha! The almighty power of suggestion has struck and Leo needs a diaper change ASAP ;) poosplosion! (but, should be contained... I really do like the tiny Poo Pockets that I made.. they have lovely gussets and I've not had a leak with them ever!)
Well, just when I'd finally come to terms with pumping all the time. . . Wednesday night dd was crying, I'd pumped and dumped earlier in the day because I'd eaten something spicy and I didn't think I had a bottle in the fridge (I did, but didn't realize it) so I got some from the freezer and put it to thaw/warm. I thought that since nothing else was consoling her I'd offer her boob and see what happened. . . she latched, nursed and went to sleep! I'm so excited! Too bad I start back to work on Monday, but she seems to transition well and feed well from whatever she is offered.
Dd seems to poop more often when she nurses vs taking breastmilk from a bottle. Does anyone know why? It's the same color/consistency as before, just more often.
I go back to work on Monday, I've been told my boss is retiring in November and I'd suspected that. She's the one supposed to be doing my job while I've been gone. I know things are a mess because I had to go in for a few hours at the end of Sept because they needed reports for the end of the fiscal year. I think it will take 6 months to get everything straightened out after being gone for 3. It was totally worth it and I get paid either way. But with her retirement plans, I think she just didn't care and really didn't even do the bare minimum to keep things running. I'm trying not to stress about it, but I am.
crafty things: I knit a bunch while pregnant, but I know thomas will be growing out of the first few sizes of longies and diaper covers before I know it. since he was born (3.5 weeks), I've finished knitting a scarf for my niece, knit a sweater that fits thomas now (a little big on him), and started a vest that will fit him later. tomorrow, my goal is to sew a mei tai (any tips? i'm looking at a couple different patterns, but never made one before), and i do intend to knit for christmas a cowl my sister requested, but that's as far as I've gotten on handmade gifts.
DH is very impressed when he sees me knitting with a baby sleeping in my lap...
we've officially switched from sposies to cloth, and it's SO NICE both to put soft cotton on his little bum and to not be filling up the trash so often (before baby, we only filled up our one trash can maybe twice a month, but with a newborn filling up disposables, it was getting a little crazy...).
nights: he's fussy off and on throughout the day, and often doesn't like to be put down, but he's sleeping for three hour stretches at night, which is AWESOME, so i don't mind all that much...
Ascher - That sounds a lot like my DD#1. I had oversupply with her but it took me a while to figure it out. Eventually I realized that sometimes, especially in the evenings, she just wanted to comfort nurse but kept getting milk anyway so she'd nurse, throw up everything and make a huge mess, then repeat 1-2 more times. Our poor couch, the slip cover did not survive those first few months :-) I started block feeding and that helped but around 12 weeks my hormones settled a bit and my oversupply went away. Now I have oversupply again with this little guy but its worse. I was up to 4 hour blocks which meant I was constantly engorged on at least one side and my letdown was painful (it never was before. If I had such painful letdown I would not have been able to nurse for 26 months with DD). Luckily yesterday he had a growth spurt and today was the first day I haven't felt engorged so maybe my body is finally getting the message! Are you block nursing, if not, you might want to try, even if you just do it for those fussy periods - just keep putting baby back on the same side.
Hyde, sorry about the smile, I'd be really bummed too. Got to love that emotional vs rational thought war after pregnancy! Omg and the comments about your MIL made me laugh! I have so been there and it's supremely irritating!!
Nuku, can you look into the pocket and see the elastic? If it looks aged at all (stiff or yellowed) it probably isn't pulling snug enough. I had some pockets that felt stretchy but the elastic was old and a little yellow, just not stretchy enough to hug the leg.
Jend, growth spurt for sure! Grow baby grow!
Katt, teegan, judybean, can't believe you all continue to craft. I don't even blow dry my hair anymore. I bow to you!!
AFM, I am freaking a little because my little peanut slept from 12:45-6:15 this morning!!! Woke up soaked in pee, through his clothes even, but wow 5.5 hours that is a FIRST! And on the eve of his six week birthday! I feel like a million bucks after that much sleep. Normally it's more like 2-3 hours, with two 4 hour stints in his entire life. I have to admit that I am crying a little right now, I'm happy to get the sleep but I still want him to need me and my milk during the night. He's curled up next to me right now and has his toe shoved into my belly button <3 In other news, he spends a few minutes chatting to himself and looking around several times a day now. It's so nice because I can get up quickly for food or to pee and he's fine. And he's ok in the carrier inside the house now! This is huge for me, before only outdoor walks were tolerated. Basically things are just getting so much easier in the last three days or so. Yesterday he sat in his bouncy seat for ten minutes while I took a quick bath! I am feeling human again! Last thing, I wrote before about the zero to sixty screaming, even that has improved ... We get about 2-5 seconds of prescream crying now! Sweet life!! And on top of all this, he's so freaking cute that I can't handle it! We are so so lucky ladies.
Hi Moms :)
MamanF - I'm sorry you are having such a hard time So glad you are feeling a benefit from the counselor.
Diapers - leaky pockets sound like they're too big... as for GMD prefolds being to bulky, I feel like they're the same size as other PFs? Maybe flat diapers would be a better choice? I love Under the Nile fitteds for nighttime. DD pees through everything and only poops every other day. We're using doublers most of the time, not just for bed. Cover wise, I prefer fleece and wool soakers, but when I need protection, I reach for the Imse Vimse or the Lite Wraps. I found all these other diapering accessories I forgot about - like all these cute custom covers and stuff I got from Etsy when DD1 was little.
Crafting - We were dealing with a yellow jacket nest in the wall of my sewing room, the bees would come in through the holes in the windowsill, EEEW. Our landlord tried to take care of it herself only to have us deal with an infestation of 25 bees, so they called an exterminator. DH vacuumed up the bee massacre this morning. I hope to gather the courage to hike up there sometime this weekend to make some soakers and finish my MW gift! And possibly start on costumes for the bigg'uns.
bleeding/libido - still bleeding here. Very light but still here. As for sex, no rush for me though DH is all kinds of feisty. He's just going to have to wait. As for birth control, we use condoms. Talking about a vasectomy but we're not ready to "close up shop" so that's not a real option at the moment. I had a non hormonal IUD for years and didn't mind it at all... but I'd rather not have anything foreign in my body.
Sleep - no pattern. Some days she sleeps well all day, all night, no fussing. Other times she fusses and fusses from 7-11 PM. I don't get it. Count her in the "happiest when snuggled against mom" group. She definitely doesn't "go down" for naps. In fact last night I was in tears because suddenly this week I am sooo tired, and she kept dozing off then waking back up only be to super fussy. I was at my wits end. DH wasn't being effective. Put her in the MT, walked downstairs to the rocker, and rocked us both to sleep.
MDC layout - when did this change? I don't like it at all!
exercise/weight - no idea what I weigh but I am so squishy it's disgusting. I feel like dough. I went on a walk this morning which was nice, but I really want to get out an run or get on my bike. A swim would be amazing. Really want to get into a regular yoga routine.
Work - I haven't decided whether or not I"m going back. I want to keep my resume current, but financially it doensn't really make sense. Should have let them know by the end of September but I didn't so DH and I really need to figure this out.
Bottles/pacis - none of mine ever took bottles (we tried!) With DD1 I went back to school 10 days post partum and she never once took a bottle. S T R E S S F U L. She ended up being spoon fed and taking it from a cup. There are options if they won't bottle feed. Despite a dazzling array of pacifier types and sizes, neither DD1 nor DS ever took one, but so far this DD2 seems okay with the Soothie kind. I'm not a big fan of pacis, but she *hates* the car, so anything to provide some comfort is okay by me.
I'm so tired lately (we're almost 4 weeks PP!). All the help is gone and this week was the first full week of school without any holidays. It was a lot of driving back and forth. We've eaten through our freezer stash, the cupboards are getting low, and I have to be creative with what's on hand.
Forceful letdown: I've been block-nursing...I just decide that for two hours he's going to feed on the same side. Usually I just wing it, though. Like if I know he didn't have a long feeding, I'll put him back on the same side. It's been helping his gassiness. He did spit up again today, but I've noticed that he doesn't burp or spit up as much as he used to. I also have painful letdown, so sometimes I will take him off when it happens, soak up the excess with a towel, then put him back on again when it slows a bit.
Indigestion: Has anyone else been having, um, diarrhea? Mine's been pretty bad since a few weeks postpartum. It's bad, now. Like it's killing me. And that's ON a pro-biotic, which doesn't seem to help.
sleeping/napping: I finally found a sling that works. And I simply made one. The k'tan wasn't working, the pouches weren't working. So I finally just grabbed the old worn-out jersey flat sheet off my bed, hacked it in half, sewed the two ends together, and made a Moby. I haven't worn it outside, but it has been a godsend. Because my baby hasn't been sleeping for very long the past few days and I nearly lost it last night. He will nurse, close his eyes for 20 minutes if I'm lucky, then he's up again, wanting to be held and wanting to suck. He literally did that all day yesterday, and oddly, didn't make up for it at night. I don't know how this child is functioning with so little sleep because I'm not. And I'm not doing the pacifier thing. Not ready to give into that pressure yet.
diapers: All the newborn diapers I made are basically not fitting too much, anymore. I moved all the velcro so that I had velcro tabs that stuck out beyond the fabric, but then I finally gave in and just started using my OS AIO diapers, because it was easier than the cover and fitted diaper thing. And the explosive poo...oh the explosive poo...there is no way my sewn diapers would survive that. I am washing the AIO's constantly, though. And just ordered 6 more.
swaddling: Anyone in warmer climate having an issue with overheating? My LO gets sweaty if I swaddle him with a kimono top, socks, and his diaper. So I started using the miracle blanket with him in just his diaper, no socks, no top, but then I worry if that's too cold. Our AC doesn't work too well in the very back of the house where our Master Bedroom is. So it's freezing sometimes and then sweltering at others. Oi...
AFM: We are looking at homes to buy right now, but my head isn't in it. Plus every amazing house that is in great condition is getting bought before we get a chance to see it. Now we're stuck with the dregs, and there's this one place that would need an overhaul of the master bathroom and new flooring in the master bedroom, but goodness knows how we would get it done with a baby in the house. We might have to move into MIL's home again while she's away this summer. It's so hard to look at a home that's far from perfect and imagine it as a dream home. Especially this one, that didn't show very well (there was a handicapped woman asleep in a bed in one of the rooms when I saw it last time so I didn't want to go in.)
I thought getting a baby out of my belly would end heartburn/acid reflux. .... .. not. even. close. In fact, I feel like things are almost WORSE now?! I would have occasional heartburn before pregnancy (fast food for dinner or one specific chain's pizza for dinner), but now it's every. single. night. I have to take four papaya enzyme tablets multiple times per night (as often as I wake up anyway). I don't get it. I don't think I've made any dietary changes -- nothing significant anyway -- so why is this happening? I was realllllly hoping it would go away beause heartburn/acid reflux is one of the worst parts of pregnancy, so it's always nice when there's no more pregnancy for no more pain. (plus, I think this is TERRIBLE on my teeth... and they're suffering right now anyway).
"1. you did that whole post one handed!?! amazing!"
She passed out mid-post.... :) But I have been able to do a lot of typing one handed, along with other computer work and class work for the technical writing course I am taking.
2. I have been watching my friend's 8 month old along with my 2 month old. The two baby thing is SO HARD and I only do it a few hours a week! my hat is off to you. for real.
Im lucky enough to have a nanny 30 hours a week. I work from home and provide a little over 50% of our household income, so its a vital necessity. I know I COULD handle both with what Ive learned over the past couple weeks, but its rough and Ive had to learn that no one will die from crying.. you know as long as everyone if fed and cared for. I dont believe in CIO, but sometimes (a lot of the time) there is jealousy or both are tired and want snuggles and cant snuggle two at once. There have been a few dual cuddle moments, but my son keeps trying to crawl on top of his sister.
Our nanny snapped this when she showed up to work. This actually lasted for 30 minutes. My son was tired enough to stop his perpetual motion and trying to grab his sister and was happy just to sit with me. Doesnt happen often.
PS- Beer on the end table is DHs from the night before. Having two kids this young is tough, but not tough enough to start of my morning with a Coors Light.
This more what its like when he isnt so tired and snuggly.... poor Annabelle. The look on her face says its all. We are working on the concept of "gentle" but its hard for a 13 month old to understand. He is getting much better now though,
We've been able to work ourselves into some sort of a routine. Its not perfect, but works. During the week, Im using up, or already up with both of them around 6 or 7 am. I savor about the first 30 minutes when my son is happily playing and DD is still sleeping (by the time my son wakes up, Im usually just getting DD back to sleep after 5am ish feeding, so she is tired). I get the dish washer loaded with bottles and dishes (I gave up on hand washing the bottles LONG ago) while I brew a cup of tea and make a protein shake or a cold GF oatmeal pancake. Bottle feed my son some of the BM I pumped out during the night. Hopefully I can get enough in him before DD wakes up hungry. If not, I end up going between the two while they are crying for about an hour till both are sufficiently fed. If I am in the middle of feeding DS and she cries, he is hopelessly distracted and wont take a bottle, so I feed her while he is constantly trying to climb on my lap or grab his sisters feet or steal my burp cloth or get into trouble because Im not paying him enough attention. This eventually leads to a meltdown on my son part by the time I done feeding her. So I try to get her situated somewhere while I try to cram some more bottle into him.
By about 9 am, both kiddos are usually tired.... again. DS because he usually wakes up before he is fully rested. DD because she was just getting back to sleep when DS woke up and he has very loud toys that keep her from getting good sleep. Its impossible to get both down simultaenous without taking them for a walk/jog. So, load up the double bob and go out for a little over an hour and both usually sleep the whole time.
During the week, I usually try to do this around 8 am , go out for about 30 minutes, then load up the car and head to bootcamp. DS like to play with the other kids and DD is usually sleeping as we wheel them around. On the weekends, I go out 1 hour plus jog while DH is still sleeping in (can't say im not insanely jealous). yesterday I got in 5.1 miles (measured using phone app).
During the week, our nanny comes from about 10am-5pm and helps with DS while I take care of DD and try to get work done. When DS goes down for nap, I try to time it so I am just finishing a nurse-fest with DD and head out for my 1 hour of baby-less time at the barn or running an errand. I leave pumped BM for DD in a tommee tippee bottle which she will take if she is truly hungry (not just snacky- you know what I mean). Our nanny is a great baby snuggler so it usually works out. Come home and try to get more work done between nursing/cuddling DD on my lap while I am working on the computer. She is a very clingy baby and Im happy to oblige her need to be attached, I just have to get work done too.
At about 5ish during the week our nanny takes off and eithe 1) DH still working and Ill walk the kiddos to the dog park because they are cranky again or 2) family walk together. When we get back Ill attempt to prepare something for hte both of us to eat. Husband takes over DS duties while I deal with DD during her witching/walking hours. I usually spend about 7-11pm going from nursing to putting her in wrap and going around the block to get her to sleep and then coming home with her asleep and attached (transferring to sleeping alone is impossible at this time) and cleaning up around the house to keep moving to keep her happy. Repeat every hour until she is sleepy and calm (I can tell she is ready when I can sit down for longer than 5 minutes and she doesnt instantly wake up). Go to bed. Wake up every 2 hours to feed, pump off excess for son, cuddle and go back to bed, with me getting about 3-4 hours of sleep a night. DH usually gets up once a night just to give DS a bottle and put him back to bed.
And this is why you should be very careful not to get pregnant right away. Breast feeding is not good birth control. I love my kids, but this is rough!
3. I have not seen the woombie before. it looks great! thanks for the link!
It was on babysteals.com, or zulily.com or something like that. DD is in it right now zipped up to her chest with her little arms free.
Edited by activealli - 10/21/12 at 7:39am
activealli - I am so happy for you that you have a nanny. LOL
So is anyone else sure they are DONE having babies? I am done. Sometimes I think I want to give Dexter a sibling close in age but then I remember how much I value my sleep and independence and squash that idea. DH needs to get a vasectomy so I can't change my mind.
Done? Yes, we are done, but haven't done anything about it. The OB suggested DH to get a vasectomy while I was healing from my cs so that we were both ready to go at the same time. But postpartum, I just couldn't pull the trigger on that, I just felt emotions were too high to make that permanent. I am regretting it now at 7.5 weeks. I don't want to do any bc for me, so that leaves condoms, which, meh...
DTD... We have twice now. Last time, I had Atrophic vaginitis, and figured it would reoccur. So I went on estrace cream, it really helped and the 2nd time was better. Now just to make time for it and not be touched out or exhausted!
Baby C is mainly really sweet. I don't know what his patterns are, except he gets a good long stretch of sleep at the beginning of the night, at least 4 hrs. It depends on how much he has cluster fed before. Most of the time he has quiet alert periods, but sometimes he's just irritable and inconsolable. . BF is going well, I am pumping to donate, wish I could get compensated for my food because I am ravenous!
http://www.stilllearninglife.com/ or http://diyhoodtoheadrestmeitai.blogspot.com/2009/05/tutorial-moved-still-available.html
i have been wanting to make this one