The reality for me right now is that there is no good childcare options for me to drop off my 2 and a 1/2 year old anywhere right now. In a year- in september of next year, when he is 3 and a 1/2 there is a preschool I am absolutely happy with so I feel great about that. But until then, there is nowhere I can drop him off to play for a few hours in the morning with a daycare type situation as there are no daycares near me that even accept them 1/2 day- and I javen't even looked ot see if they are good since I would only want 1/2 day.
And I can't find a babysitter! I guess because I am not eager to leave him with someone I have just met, so I keep trying to find a friend or someone I know and to try to make a good fit- but no luck yet. And now he is in that in between stage where he is not still a baby but he is not quite a kid- aka toddler- and I am generally happy to have him with me all the time still (or he is with dh)- but dh and I are also burnt out.
So I have been feeling pressure from myself to get some childcare- because I want it but can't find it so accept that I am with him all the time now and it can ge tiring for sure!
But I finally just came to the conclusion that there IS no good childcare option for me right now. So rather than beat my head against the wall I am just going to see what comes up for options. But until then I feel like dh and I are still in this intense parenting phase where we are with ds constantly- and we are bot craving some space away from him. So it is kind of hard!
I wonder about other parents of toddlers this age- pre preschool- do you have your kids in what I ideally want- a few mornings a week with a nice teahcer/careprovider and some other kids? or another ideal that I don't have is weekly play gropus. I finally do have some play dates! But no groups yet.
So I am still living mostly how I have been sicne ds was born- totally focused on him and waiting for another year to get back into the rest of my life- is this normal for a 2 and a 1/2 yr old? he went so quickly from being a baby and next year he will be inpreschool- so I think on some levels it is okay to still hold the baby cocoon- howevr exhausting it is- around us a while longer.
how do other sahm's with this age do it?
I have this mixed feeling of- oh I need help! (childcare, a break) but then this weird guilt when ppl tell me I should get help, ppl need a break- beause I feel like I have tried and not found it so on some level accept it.