Weekly Chat October 22-28 « Back to Group Discussions

[crystal_buffaloe]

Hey! Can't believe I'm the first to start this We must all be pretty busy ... wonder why?

I currently have a napping toddler and a dozing newborn and life is pretty good.

Went for a chiro appointment this morning and I'm still all kinds of stiff/out of whack. (I feel better now, but I *really* needed the appt.) I think I may have hurt my back during labor? It seems weird to me that my back is hurting worse now than it was at the end of pregnancy -- but then I didn't have back labor, so I don't know. I carry the (small!) baby in a moby, so that's really ergonomic. Ah, well, I met my insurance deductible ages ago, so it's not a big problem to keep going every few weeks. Hopefully whatever it is resolves itself by the end of January

We're having kind of a weird nursing thing -- I have some oversupply in the AM. I've been feeding on one side and pumping off the other and that's worked pretty well. Just one or two green poops in the morning and not too fussy. But then 6pm hits and it's like I don't have enough milk. Is that even possible? I kind of suspect that it's just normal fussy-baby behavior, but then another part of me kind of suspects that if I'd just (let DH) give him a bottle, that would calm down the frantic head-bobbing into the boob fussiness. Then things are fine again by 9 or 10pm.

Also, I just had to say that only on Mothering would people be saying 3-4 hour stretches of sleep are AWESOME (But I totally agree! That's what we're getting, too -- well, 3 hours anyway. <3 you guys.)

[crystal_buffaloe]

Oh, and are we done? Arrrg. I don't know. I would like DD to have a sister, but ... we could end up having a lot of kids that way! The first person IRL asked me this today and I had no idea how to answer. It is not helping that DS's birth was so easy. I'm like, "Oh yeah, I could totally do that again!" (famous last words, right?)

I brought up LAM/NFP with DH last night and he was totally (surprisingly) not on board. We charted to avoid (right before trying) & to conceive with both kiddos (successfully) so I thought he'd be more open to it (usually anything related to birth control he just goes along with what I say, so hmmm).

[MamanFrancaise]

I would be content with 3-4 hours of solid sleep. That's all I really hope for when I go to bed. But my little guy has been giving me 7-9 hours. For real. Not gonna lie, I am really, really enjoying it.  After my last baby, I honestly didn't think this was possible with a breastfed baby. And he's gaining really well, he has officially grown out of 90% of his 3 month clothing. He fits into 6 month Carter clothing if that gives you an idea of how giant my 6 week old is. LOL

Dexter does a face mashing into boob thing accompanied by a lot of grunting in the evenings, too. Like he's frustrated about something... not sure what's going on. He eventually settles though.

Things are slowing down in here! I don't want our DDC to die. Can't we graduate to a September 2012 baby group or something?

[nukuspot]

I can't even imagine 7-9 hours from a newborn. Wow. I get 2 easy wakings for a quick nursing from 10-3. Then the grunting and farting start. It's way worse without a swaddle so we always swaddle to sleep. But I'm up trying to help her fart from 3-6am. Then at 6am I wake DH (who is in the other bed with DD1) and we switch beds. I wait for this alllll night. He takes baby downstairs and lets her go back to sleep on his chest while I get about 1-3 hours of unbroken sleep in bed with DD1.

The baby takes a bottle from DH with no issues, so this morning we tried leaving him with a bottle of BM in the fridge overnight. Plan was that he would feed her when she woke on his chest at 8am and them I could have maybe 3+ hours of sleep! But he couldn't warm it under the sink hot water quick enough and she screamed and woke up DD1. Once that happens there is no chance for sleep. So, my question is, is there a quick way to warm a bottle from the fridge, or can DH take a bottle of BM from the fridge out and leave it on the counter at room temp until 8am? Baby doesn't like cold BM, and since DD1 never had bottles this is all new to me. Any advice appreciated!

PS---I left DH with a bottle of freshly pumped BM on the counter and I'm at the Gym right now! I can't tell you all how happy this makes me. Pumping is really freeing. I am trying not to overdo it, just 1-2 bottles a day, but man, I'm back at the gym! I feel so so happy right now.

[nukuspot]

nak,,,

and wow, i hate the new mdc format.  hate it!

[nukuspot]

i dont want this group to die either.  maybe we can make a facebook group?

[crystal_buffaloe]

Milk is good for 5 (or more!) hours at room temp, so I'd just have him take it out enough in advance so it could be really quickly warmed in the sink.

So sorry about the sleep issues, nuku.

[Carlin]

I hope this group stays alive too! It was reasonably active last week, so hopefully people were just having a nice, relaxing weekend with their families! 

We've had a miserable couple days. My toddler and I both have horrible colds and the baby has been fussy in the evenings. Last night she was up and fussy from 10 to 12:30 then the 3 year old was up from about 1:30 to 3:30 before she finally settled into bed with us. 4 in a queen sized bed is not super comfortable, and I literally couldn't even turn over until after DH got up this morning. I've got my fingers crossed that we will both be feeling better by tomorrow, but mostly I'm just hoping that the baby doesn't catch it. She's been a little snuffly today, but hopefully the breast milk antibodies do their job.

Blah, I wanted to respond to other posts but my head's too foggy and I can't seem to remember what I wanted to say from one moment to the next. So sorry for the whiney post!

[Jend1002]

I would be so sad to see this group die off! I love being a part of this ddc!

Sleep- I am right there with you, Nuku! DS sleeps swaddled at the start of the night but I only get a 2-3 hour stretch. He then wants to eat and I have to hold him upright for a while because he is a major spitter upper! By the time I can lay him down again the crazy grunting and fussing begins. So DH and I take turns on the couch with Ds on our chest. That's the only way he will sleep at all. I wish I felt ok about tummy sleep because I know he'd actually sleep, but of course I can't do it.

Feeding- count me in the bobbing, thrashing, popping on and off all evening club. What is that? Its pretty frustrating. DS feeds every 2 hours Allllll say and then still just cluster feeds all evening and then I still only usually get a 2 hour stretch at night. What the heck?

More babies- nope, we are done. But yet I also have no idea about BC. I won't do hormones, didn't get my tubes tied during my c-section- I guess DH will have to go for the v. Condoms are very irritating to my skin. And speaking of sex, I am impressed by those of you who are ready. Not a ounce of me is interested. At all. But it was a while after DS1 before I felt it again so I am not surprised.

Pumping- I started today...I hate pumping after having to exclusively pump with DS1. But it went well today and I am ready to pass along some feedings to DH- mainly because DS eats so frequently and I can't even leave the house really!

Question for those of you who made wipes- how many do you have? And did you make a wipe solution? I'll admit that I've been using purchased wipes and We have a rash going on. I did it for convenience because I have one of the poop in every.single.disper babes. But now that there is a rash it's seriously time to stop with the chemicals!!

Carlin- just saw your post. Sorry you and your toddler are sick! Awful! I have a nasty cold too and the baby has been extremely fussy and seems to have stomach trouble right now. I hope he doesn't get the nose stuff too. Awful for a baby! My 4 year old had the cold first but he has recovered so its a little easier than what you have going on. He did wet the bed last night though so there's always that nighttime fun I hope it's a better night for you tonight, Carlin!
Edited by Jend1002 - 10/22/12 at 6:47pm

[nukuspot]

Nak.... I just use plain water from the tap on our cloth wipes.

[Carson]

DTD, I am not 'interested' per say, but well just taking one for the team, kwim? The cream has helped it not be excruciating, I'm sure my ibido will come back in oh 18 years...

Evening fussies... Totally normal! Hormones are lw in the pm, which lowers your supply. combined with a baby trying to tank up forthe evening, and there you have it. I have DH give DSan oz or two of am pumped milk while I make dinner. Then I just let him nurse all evening.

Wipes, yep water from tap or a lil squirt of soap if poopy. We tried solution but just wasn't necessary for us.

[WindyCityMom]

Hey everyone!  This week has been busy for me as well.  Homeschooling is an everyday thing, plus gymnastics for my older DDs, plus therapy for DD1, plus spending the weekends basically entirely at MILs house visiting with other family.  

I go back to work THIS SATURDAY!    Thats 4 days from now.  It doesn't help that I only have 24oz of milk in the freezer!  I HATE PUMPING!  I can easily get another 20oz into the freezer by Saturday, 40oz if I pump twice/day.  A bowl of oatmeal, a little extra water, and some Mother's Milk tea is all it takes to get my supply completely crazy and overflowing.  Like, I could walk around with buckets under my boobs kinda crazy.

I don't even know how much milk to leave with my MIL!  My first shift is 2-8pm.  I'll be leaving at noon and will likely not be back home until 10pm.  That's 10hrs worth.  I'd say Nova does about an ounce an hour (a full-ish breast that gives me 4oz at the pump will last her about 4 hours), but even then I'm not totally sure.  We still have some trial formula at my MILs house and I'm okay with her getting a bottle of formula if for whatever reason she runs out of milk- but this is confusing, lol.

DTD- OMG.  What's that?!  Really, I haven't thought about it.  I'm not bleeding anymore.  I'm fine.. but I'm not telling my DH that! 

[judybean]

Wipes-- i have no clue how many we actually have. I've made dozens and dozens, but they also serve as kleenexes and washcloths and sometimes napkins (the changing table is in the dining room). I typically figure you'll want at least one wipe per diaper. I often use just water to wet the wipes, but for the diaper bag I have a little spray bottle of witch hazel, water, and a couple drops of some lavender/tea tree oil.

Sleep-- I really have no clue when ds wakes up. I'm up with dd4 far more and for longer spans, so I don't even look at the clock or count the times. He wakes (gently, I nurse him (usually side-lying unless he can't seem to get a good latch... it's trickier on the left side), and he goes back to sleep.

My biggest excitement of late is to have stopped bleeding *knockonwood*. I've been pad-free for three days now and that's *super* exciting to me! I've never stopped bleeding so soon before! I think it's because I actually rested and let my body heal faster.

With bleeding stopping, I might think about quick gym trips. I don't want to rush things, but I do feel better when using/moving my body. It's a tricky balance for me. I'm not judging any other parenting styles/ways, but for me I think that when babies are little, they deserve as much of me as I can give... and for me it means breastfeeding at every feed and no bottles just for my convenience. If this means I don't get to hit the gym for months, then so be it. (That's what happened after dd4, anyway.. . She was always my challenging baby in every way!!). And if I'm truly honest, I'll admit that I'm a bit nervous about gym time for these two reasons: 1) I don't have workout clothes to camouflage my jiggly/still fluffy belly and 2) leaking boobs!! I would just walk outside briskly with Leo in the wrap or invest in a jogging stroller, but it's getting cold here. The high on Friday is supposed to be 36° with a low of 19°. That's pretty chilly.

Madimamacita-- I totally love that mei tai tute you linked to in thr last chat thread!! I really want to make one! That's the best one I've seen I think!

I would really like to see this group thrive and continue also. With my DDC from dd3 (over seven years ago!), we initially had a separate site for a private chat board (through proboards), but now have a private group on Facebook. I really think it works well.

[Jend1002]

WCM- I hear you about pumping! I know you are excited to get back to work though! So I wouldn't assume that just because you get 4 oz pumping that that is all Nova is eating. id say figure out how many times she eats in 10 hours then maybe go for 2 oz per time? My lactation consultant suggested I freeze milk in 2 oz amounts but then to also freeze a few 1 oz portions too - in case 2 doesn't do it- better to thaw another single oz than to waste. Seems like a reasonable suggestion to me at this point so I thought I'd share!

Judybean- I was just up with DS1 (who is 4) for the first time tonight of many. Sorry your DD4 is a terrible sleeper too! It's rough.

[judybean]

Jend -- so sorry you have a poor older sleeper as well. It's hard! Dd4 has *always* been a terrible sleeper. Lately, she will wake up... well, I should actually say that she cries out, and I will go to her bed and she is inconsolable.... because she's not really awake. Anything I say is met with screams or worse. So I will just hold her and tell her that I love her as she thrashes and screams and cries. Eventually she'll really wake up and talk with me and fall back asleep for a bit. It can get quite exhausting . Last night she was only up three times. I hope for less tonight. We'll see...

[katt]

i made about 40 wipes.  that is more then enough.

i made a wipe solution, water, apricot oil and baby wash.  don't use it very much though, mostly use plain water.

[Jend1002]

Judybean- we went through the exact same thing! It lasted about 6 months. DS1 wOud call for me sometime between bedtime and midnight but wouldn't be awake and would be inconsolable, crying for mom and thrashing about. I responded the same way as you. It hasn't happened in a while. I hope it passes soon for you DD4! Now DS wakes me about 3 times per night on average. He's on a very low dose of melatonin and without it, he can't fall asleep and is up a lot more. It has helped him tremendously. OH- And you had posted about heartburn last week. I suddenly have it now and did NOT while pregnant. I almost wonder what that could be about??

And thanks to those with wipes advice- I'm ordering from etsy today because I can barely sew a hole in a seam! I am the opposite of crafty plus I love love etsy.

Apparently I am chatty this week! I really should try sleeping instead but DS is on my chest right now and is super wiggly. I smell the coffee DH made too...very distracting

[teegan db]

Jen, we have the same problem at night, so I end up putting him on my chest when he's super fussy and he sleeps better. I would never leave him on his tummy on his own, but I feel much safer doing it with him on me. I also cut out any heavy dairy in the second half of the day, went back to drinking the mothers milk tea (not for milk quantity, but because I've heard the herbs can soothe a baby's gas), and burp him pretty thoroughly after all evening feedings. I think it's helping a little, but he's so changeable at this point it's difficult to tell!

[Monkey Keeper]

crystal_buffaloe-My back has been like that with a couple of my births. I'd love to go to the chiro again (I've been once) but she is out on maternity leave right now. As for the nursing thing, that's SO normal. Our hormone cycle causes us to have lower supply in the evenings. I just sit in a chair and let her switch hit as much as I can!

 

mamanF--Oh my! He's SO big :) H is a sleeper too, and I almost embarrassed to admit it. Though like you, I have had a really BAAAD sleeper too, so I know it's nothing I am doing but rather temperament! 

nuku--I totally would have DH put the bottle out when he moves downstairs with DD. BM stays good a lot longer than we think. If you use a microwave, you can heat up water in a large glass and submerge the bottle in the heated water too. I'm glad pumping and the gym are helping you find some balance right now. /that is so hard.

Carlin--UGH!!! How awful to be sick! Get better soon.

Jend--About the only reason I would have preferred a c/s would have been to have my tubes tied. Figuring out bc stinks. I'm so glad you and your LO have gotten the hang of BF!!! Pumping is not my favorite at. all.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carson 

DTD, I am not 'interested' per say, but well just taking one for the team, kwim? ...I'm sure my ibido will come back in oh 18 years...

Bwaaahaaahaaaahhaaa!!! Thanks for speaking the truth, Carson!!

WCM--I'm with you on the crazy supply. I am pumping 2x a day with no herbal support at all and pumping anywhere from 22-30oz!  I'm glad I don't have to pump more often than that though. I'd probably leave around 16oz to be safe. Have you thought about just putting the pumps from later in the week in a Mason jar instead of freezing? THen MIL can use as needed and you can freeze whatever is left when you get home? I've had better luck with that than set increments.

judy--Night terrors. TERRIBLE. I'm so sorry you're dealing with them. Knock on wood none of my kids have had them, but both my niece and nephew did. They're so scary, and you feel so helpless. Yay for stopping bleeding!  I'd be excited to get moving/sweating again too.  I think everyone finds their own balance WRT to how much we subjugate our needs to the needs of the baby and how much we need space/"me time" to be the best mother we can be. Figuring out what that balance is is the tricky part!

 

 

AFM--Well, I thought my bleeding was done, but then I started having a lot heavier bleeding last night. It had tapered off to sporadic spotting. I think I remember reading somewhere that that was common?  I was exactly 4 weeks pp yesterday.  I feel fine, so I'm not too worried about it. I'm pumping to donate, and I pump mostly my right side only (it responds better to the pump) and getting about 25oz which is enough to feed the other baby entirely. A good feeling, and selfishly, I'm glad I don't have to pump more frequently than I do.  As for sleep, I'm  almost embarrassed to admit that H is sleeping anywhere from 5-8 hours in her first stretch and only waking to eat. She's a little challenging to settle for the night, but once she is asleep, she is OUT. She does the first stretch in the cosleeper from  about 10-11 to 5 or so. Then I bring her into bed, nurse her side-lying, and we go back to sleep for 3 hours or so.

 

We are done with babies, and I am very, very sad about it. Four is plenty for us, but I am sad that the being pregnant part of my life is over. And I really wish we could have another son to have more balance in our family...but that's certainly not a guarantee even if we were to have a dozen more kids! I'm really trying to appreciate H's babyhood because this is it. It's hard with other kids though. We need to decide what to do about birth control though...DH is likely going to get a vas, and we should do that now since we have a high deductible health plan. But part of me gets sick at the thought of making it *that* permanent.

 

I'd love to continue to keep in touch! I definitely would miss all of you. I am sad that due to my IRL stalker issues I had to name change and drop out of my old DDC. They are still somewhat active in the Toddlers forum as far as I know. I have good friends from due date threads on other sites from my older kids as well.

[Worldshakerz]

I'll definitely would love to see this group continue - whether here or on facebook or whatever. I haven't been posting as much because I'm just so foggy minded lol. I read all the time and have been posting fairly short  replies. I've been feeling pretty low the last few days, I could maybe even say mildly depressed. I'm sure some of it is postpartum hormones, some of it is sleep deprivation - although my sleep hasn't been too bad. I think it has to do with the health issues I started to unravel before I got pregnant - relating to adrenal fatigue and food sensitivities. I'm pretty sure its the daily 2 to 3 cups of coffee that is putting me in a foul mood :( which sucks, because I can use the caffeine kick. 

My midwife just called as I was typing this message - I guess I missed my 6 week postpartum appt today...although the 6 week mark isn't for a few more days. I just rescheduled  for a week from today. She said she is going to give me a discount on the home birth fee since she didn't even get there for a while after he was born LOL. I'm okay with that :). I think the lochia is done now. Since about week 3 it was very sparse and sporadic and now in week 5 it has been days says I saw any random blood or clots. It's really a relief to have that done. 

My MIL and FIL are stopping by in a few hours - in about 3 hours to be exact. I am cleaning like a maniac while the baby is napping in the bassinet. I want at least the front half of the apartment to be presentable for the in laws. 

Diapers - I was given 1 case + a bag of newborn disposable diapers at the baby shower and they still aren't gone. Meanwhile I don't have a lot of cash to get the kind of cloth diapers I want - and alas I don't sew (not at the level of skill some of you do anyway). I actually think I may start learning to sew though. I only used chinese prefolds for DS1, and with my daughter I used mainly Fuzzi Bunz. I really prefer that style of diaper! I may just get some cpf to start and slowly build a supply of pocket diapers/aoi's. Do any of you crafty moms sell your diaper creations?

Carlin - We've all had a cold here too, even the baby. I've had it for over two weeks now. The first 2 days were the worst because it started with a sore throat. That went a way and its just been congestion that is slowly improving each day. My cold is almost gone - the older kids and DH are better. Baby has congestion and I'm squirting BM in his nose and using the suction bulb every day. It's been improving - luckily its not a severe cold, its just long and annoying. 

Pumping - I would like to start pumping but when my friend returned the breast pump I lent her a few years ago, it was missing some parts. So I am waiting for parts to be delivered to me. I would just like to have a little stash so if I want to go out for a few hours. I have gone out for about an hour without the baby, but I just go right after feeding him and DH will use the pacifier as needed. This little guy just loves to comfort nurse and much of the time I let him, but its nice that he'll take the pacifier for my quick trips to the store, or if DH needs to comfort him if I'm in the shower, etc. 

Well, I suppose I should get to cleaning while the LO is asleep. I have quite a bit to accomplish before the in laws get here in about 3 hours.