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For the love of God, please just take a nap!!

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

What age did your toddler stop taking a nap. My dd is 21 months and for the last 6-8 weeks has been so difficult to get to sleep. Both at nap time and bedtime. We do not co-sleep. I think this might be something that has gone along with other changes she has made since I became pregnant (seriously, I think she is psychic). I found out I was pregnant at 3 weeks along and am 13 weeks now. As soon as I found out I was pregnant she completely stopped going potty in her diapers and started telling me she had to go potty. She also became super mommy's girl and wants to be held more, by me, DH, and grandma. I am wondering if the not wanting to sleep is part of this all too.


Anyway, she normally gets up around 7.30 am, gets sleepy around 11.00 and takes a nap around 11.30 until 2.00-something. Goes to bed around 9.00. Now it is taking maybe 45 minutes to get her to take a nap, then she usually wakes up after an hour but is still sleepy, and I rub her back until she is back to sleep. Night time takes almost 2 hours before she is asleep. Its a bit ridiculous. She has always been a good sleep. Started sleeping 9 hours straight at night at 8 weeks old. At night we rock, read books, sing, read more books, rock, rock, rock, put her in her bed and rub her back, rub her hair, leave the room and tell her I have to go potty and I will be back in a minute, she cries, go rub her back some more.......


She's not getting any teeth that I know of and she hasn't been sick.

post #2 of 13

Both of mine started giving up naps around that age as well.. my first sign they needed to stop napping was just what you described.. DS2 is 23 months and takes naps about 3 days a week right now.. if he naps, he is up until 11 pm, if he doesn't nap he is in bed by 6

post #3 of 13

WE are right there with you and naps.  I just left our 2.5 year old twins and yelled at my husband that I can't deal with it any more.  I'm 38 weeks pregnant with another set of twins and usually one of us lays down in their room until they fall asleep.  It just seems like whenever I try that they don't go to sleep, I loose all patience (30 plus minutes) and leave them...then they scream or don't care and jump all around on their beds.  I on the other hand am generally enraged because they don't listen (to stay in their beds, or stop talking or to lay their heads down, etc.) and I either want a nap or have plenty to do instead of staying and fighting with them for an hour or more. 

There is no door on their room...our neighbor/handyman has this on his to do list, but for me, it can't come fast enough.  They have books, dollies/stuffed animals, a water bottle and have always had a good routine: white noise, the same music and we do the same things to prep for naps/bedtime. 

I would be fine if they could just have quiet time too...perhaps that is what they are working towards themselves.  I just can't, especially with 2 due any day now, deal with the time and energy suck it is to get them to fall asleep. 

post #4 of 13

It was that rage that made me drop naps for my now 2.5 year old.  She started dropping on and off at 20 or so months, and right around 24 months I decided I just couldn't try anymore.   Unlike other kids, she never got to that "if she naps, she won't go to sleep at night" stage which, to me, is really the hallmark of nap-dropping.  It took months for my daughter to be able to handle herself in the afternoon and early evening without a nap.  Nowadays she can usually make it through supper without breaking down, and she's asleep in her bed at 6. 


Just wondering - now that you're having trouble with her naps, is she napping later than usual?  If so, are you adjusting her bedtime to make up for it?   Also, have you tried letting her be awake when she wakes after 45 minutes?  You could try doing a hybrid nap-quiet time and just read to her for a while instead of putting her back to sleep. 

post #5 of 13

We went through a period around 2-2.5 where naps were a struggle, for the first half of that we were still nursing to sleep for naps and it was taking 30ish minutes for her to fall asleep. When I got pregnant again I think I made it to 12ish weeks before I couldn't handle the sensations that came with nursing anymore and naps became a real battle. I have always laid down for naps with her and I tried a lot of different things (and had many frustrated days where I would yell and just leave the room because it was so obvious she still needed a nap) before finally coming to the realization that I should ask her what she needed to be able to take a nap. It may be a little early communication-wise for that to work for you but if she can pick between 2 choices maybe try something like "would you like me to rock you for naptime, or do you want me to rub your back?" and try few different things for a while to see if there is something that she needs to help her sleep.

post #6 of 13
Thread Starter 

Well, the update is she hasn't taken a nap since I originally posted this. She just powers through all day. I am a amazed! She was getting a little break-downish about 20 minutes ago so she got ready for bed and is now zonked in her crib at 7:30! I am actually feeling less stressed as I thought I would. I thought I would be fried by the time she normally took a nap but it's like since I know she will be definitley ready for bed this early and goes to bed so easily now I don't dread trying to put her down.


Thanks for the responses! Glad I'm not the only one with a 2 year old who doesn't nap.


And QMTwins!!!! Good luck, that sounds like a lot on your plate. And congrats on making it to 38 weeks with twins!!

post #7 of 13

Our 2.5 year old dropped naps completely 3 weeks ago but they started fizzling at 22 months.  Now, if he DOES nap, bedtime is a mess...so we don't "allow" naps if they are at all preventable.  Right now we're trying to push him to stay awake until 7pm, but I'm thinking the latest we can push for the evening is 6:30pm with occasional 6pm bedtimes.  

post #8 of 13

OP, it is as if you wrote the post for me.  I was literally going to ask the same thing.  I'm not pregnant, but my DD is 22 months and while she has never gone to sleep before 9p, she is staying up very late.  We started out co-sleeping and attempted to transition her to her own bed over a year ago, but she has yet to sleep through the night in her own bed, with the exception of a few random times.  


Our attempted routine:

  1. We bathe her sometime between 8p-9p, then diaper and dress her.  
  2. Then we give her a sippy cup of water with a splash of milk and try to get her to lay down in her own bed. 
  3. Once we get her into her own bed, either DH or I lay down with her and read her a few books.
  4. Eventually, she gets sleepy and she snuggles into us to dose off.
  5. Then we sneak away to our bedroom.
  6. She usually wanders into our room around 1 or 2am, but DH and I are so exhausted from work that we just let her crawl into our bed.
  7. We don't sleep very good with her in our beds because she moves around so much and hangs on to us for dear life.
  8. We both wake up groggy and get ready for work.  
  9. Then when I pick DD up from daycare, they report that she had a 2 hour nap.


On the weekends when DD is with us the whole time, I think she is just so excited to hang out with us that she doesn't want to nap.  As of the last 3 weeks, DD won't fall asleep till  nearly midnight.  She is running around her room, jumping on the bed and having a grand ol' time.


DH and are exhausted and we kind of miss each other as there is never any downtime for the two of us to connect.


OP, sorry if this feels like I'm taking over your thread, but I can relate so much to what you are going through right now.

post #9 of 13

Come to think of it, I should probably start a new thread, so forgive.

post #10 of 13

it's probably a little early still for us (baby girl is 18 months old) but i can definitely see us dropping naps sometime in the next half year. she dropped the second nap months ago and maybe once a week or so now she won't nap at all. our schedule is tremendously *off* so she usually falls asleep around 11ish and wakes up around 9:30. if she doesn't nap, she's in bed by 9. it's a beautiful beautiful thing. ;D  so, no tips, just empathy.

post #11 of 13
Thread Starter 

BK mommy, no problem. I do it all the time! haha


Bookwise - My dd didn't take consolidated naps until she was 5 months, dropped her 2nd nap at 11 months. Maybe she could've dropped her nap even earlier but this whole Spring and Summer we were out late watching Dh's softball until 10 a lot so she didn't go to bed until 11 or so and she was ready for a nap the next day at noon.

post #12 of 13

I'm glad to hear from some of you that this seems like the age where some kids drop naps.  It felt too early for me...perhaps its because I'm too tired and really want the nap! 

BaileyB: I guess there is some consolation that if you don't get your mommy time as your little one(s) nap that at least you can get an earlier evening started.  Ours finally did nap today...but it took my husband holding them in their beds (neither of us like this for many reasons) and are falling asleep (I hope) with him in the room now (hopefully they are all asleep by now!).  Its after 9pm.  If they took no naps and were in bed by 7pm...I'd feel good about that.  It would give us some time to ourselves.  And, yes, hopefully ours wouldn't fight night time so much too. 

Good luck!

post #13 of 13

just had to share.. yesterday I kept DS2 up from his nap and he went to "bed" at 6 pm like he normally does when he hasn't napped.... then he was up at 8pm and stayed up until AFTER MIDNIGHT! ....only to awaken at 7 AM this morning ready to go!!!!!! I had a lot of time to think of a "plan" last night though.. I have the book "Sleepless in America" and I remember one of her big points on changing schedules- is to wake them up at the same time everyday. DS2 was sleeping in most mornings if he went to bed late (yesterday he didn't get up until 9:30!) BUT when he does that, I have to be in the bed with him, and my 4 yo is up around 6 (and DH leaves for work at 7) so DS1 was spending 2 hours up and alone in the mornings and that just can't happen. I need them to be on a similar schedule.... So we decided to start waking DS2 up around 7-7:30 each morning (he must've heard my thoughts because he woke up this morning at 7!) and go from there. That way if he DOES need a nap, he will go down earlier (like maybe noon instead of 2 or 3) and hopefully go to bed earlier/easier at night... I remember it taking DS1 a few weeks to transition to no naps (which he also did right at 2 yo) but we have been in this nap/no nap limbo for 2 or 3 months now! I'm done!


Also, I HIGHLY prefer no napping and early bedtime, to naps and late bedtime.

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