I haven't spent a lot of time with 2 year olds except my daughter so i'm not sure what behavior is in the range of typical. My Daughter is starting to cut her final set of molars and also is in the process of dumping her nap (naps about once a week but acts like she needs more) so i am contending with a tired and in pain kiddo here. But lately things just seem to be getting worse with her and i realize this morning that i am starting to actually dread the day because i know it is just another day full of power struggles that leave me feeling lost and drained and feeling like i have miserably failed somewhere. I need advice.
Our biggest issue is teeth brushing. It has been an issue since the beginning but we have always found ways to get the job done, be it tickle torture, teddy brushing her teeth, letting her watch a video while we did it and so on. Now that she is getting older nothing seems to work anymore. I even mention teeth brushing and she runs to the other side of the apartment and shuts herself in our bedroom. The funny part is she will then start crying if i don't come in to get her as if she is playing a game with me or something. For the last week or so we have been using a consequence that if she doesn't let us brush her teeth for 20 seconds she cant watch a youtube video (nursery rhymes) It was kind of working but we had to battle with her a bit about it first in the form of am argument before she realized that she would have to open her mouth or the video really and truly wasn't coming. Then today i got the idea that maybe a reward would work better then a consequence so i made a sticker chart (is that even GD? prly a bad idea i know) and i think she got it after i explained but then she refused to let us brush and had a melt down about still wanting the sticker and went to bed with no sticker/or video/dirty teeth. I feel terrible and have no idea where to go with this. What do i even do now?
She also refuses to wash her hands when asked (i have to make it a game where one of her toys needs a shower with the kitchen sink sprayer), runs away when it is bath time, frequently refuses diaper changes, refuses to get dressed and changes her mind constantly about things in regards to clothes. IE. we get her all dressed and she starts throwing a fit about how she wants a dress not pants even though she picked the pants. I also know she is capable of dressing herself but she will never do it unless it is dress up clothes that aren't practical for wearing in 50 degree weather. I also feel like she should be doing more things such as taking her own coat and shoes off when we come in the door but i still do it for her. She is VERY smart and speaking full sentences for a long time now so it isn't as if she doesn't understand my requests. She just doesn't want to do ANYTHING that she thinks mommy wants her to do.
Also we are not potty training even though all of her peers we know her age are or already have. We have given up on it 4 times in the last year. It goes ok at first and then after a few days she refuses to sit when prompted. We started out with chocolate chip rewards (terrible advice from our pedi) and we even tried going without a diaper for a MONTH 2 months ago and she still had constant accidents so i got frustrated (i was so stressed i was in tears when i gave up) and now she is back in diapers full time. I think she is maybe emotionally not very mature for her age and just isn't ready yet?...but i have no idea how to pick it up again when she is in this stage. How long will this stage last or is it not a stage and just that i am doing something horribly wrong? How on earth will i ever potty train her when she flat out refuses to sit when i request for her to sit?
THANK you so much in advance if you even read all of this let alone if you have advice for me <3