Queer Conceptions: November 2012 - Page 9

[joyseattle]

sphinxy - No need to clarify, sorry if I sounded snippy, and thanks for your compliment. Controlling the things I can control helps, but I was getting a bit batty with the wait to O. It wasn't actually that long, but was intensified by the fact that I started in on the observations and opks earlier than usual, thus ran out of my normal opks, ordered another brand and paid wait to much for express shipping, and then felt like each day draaaaged along. Knowing myself I already made a list of things to do during this tww.

m&m - yeah my sample size is small too. I appreciate your positivity about this cycle, and I hope you're right. I do however like to have the next step lined up so that's that.
 

It's exciting we have so a few washingtonians here. We're doing the big public thing at city hall downtown. I'm sure the capitol thing will be crazy fun.

[sotohana]

Yay! Thanks MrsandMrs! We will likely be there.

[fillefantome]

easttowest, thanks for the tip! Are you just a master googler, or is this a place you have experience with? It's actually just blocks away from J's house, which eases my anxiety about asking him to do anything even slightly inconvenient during this process.

In other news, my favorite TWW coping mechanism/obsession so far (I knew I'd have one--I can be super-OCD under stress)--as of this morning when I insem'd on CD14 and haven't had a temp rise yet on CD17--is to go to FF's chart gallery and do a search for pregnant charts with "intercourse" patterns of O-4 or O-3. There are more than 200 examples of each, and even though I know that's out of a hundred thousand plus, it still gives me hope. And that's all I need for now: hope, a huge amount of gratitude for my friend's generosity and the hardiness of fresh sperm, and this little image of one of J's swimmers as the "little supersperm who could," beating the odds....
Edited by fillefantome - 11/20/12 at 3:21pm

[fmorris28]

Cordelia, boy who are you telling!? I sure do as well!

Granite, Sorry to hear all the road blocks you're hitting. That BFP is going to be super worth it when you get it! Glad the clomid worked for you!!!

Sphinxy, good positive thoughts coming your way accompanied with lots of FX! Don't give up hope just yet!

Fille, Well welcome to the game! lol I hope that everything goes well for you. You seem to have everything under control!

Sotohana, Mye goodness mye OB finally got back with meeh on all mye questions! She told meeh that it wouldnt hurt to take the clomid as well as the fertilitea (i listed all the ingredients for her to make completely sure.) So looks like 2 thumbs up on that one. And yes, i do have a crazy mother, too! You're mum sounds very much like mine with the way she suggests between the lines lol!

AFM, Well I've got everything planned out, but AF is late...by 3 days. I hadn't really been thinking about it since the BFN when I tested last month. After mye insem the beginning of Oct. I bled for a couple days (lightly, but reddish,normally 4 days though) then stopped. Mye cycle is pretty regular. I started smack on the day I should've in OCt, but late in NOV? WTF?! If im not confused!! I don't feel much different. . . Any thoughts!?

[sotohana]

FMorris- thank you for the response about the fertilitea! I'll definitely check into it too.

As for your symptoms, they do sound odd indead. When you got your BFN last month did you confirm it with a blood test? 

[fmorris28]

Sotohana, Anytime! I'm getting on amazon to order it here in the next few days..who knows maybe fertility stuff will have a black friday lol. And, actually i didn't confirm with a blood test..just went off a HPT, had mye 2 day pity party then moved on.

[Sphinxy]

Well my friends, AF has arrived. It was a very slow start/stop ramp-up of spotting yesterday that screwed with my head pretty good, but in the end, here we are, right on time. Damn.

If you'll permit me a moment to be sappy, I'd just like to say that this Thanksgiving, one of the many things I am grateful for is this space with all of you. I came to this board in the middle of a panic attack a month and a half ago, the day of my first insemination. I have no close queer friends with children, and don't know anyone in "real life" who has inseminated with frozen sperm. I have a great support network of loving people but they are completely unexperienced with what DW and I are going through. It could be worse, I know, I don't mean to whine. DW and I are familiar with the uncharted territory feeling among our friends. We were the first of our friends to get married, just 2 months after DW finished her undergrad degree. And now, over six years later, we are the first trying for children. The support of all of you smart, informed, and kind queers has meant so much to me. I can't wait to hang out with all of you on the Queer & Pregnant board soon!

DW and I have had some great talks over the last two days, and decided to use December for data gathering without an insemination. Even though I've been temping since June, I've learned over the past two cycles that my process needs tweaking. These last few weeks of 2012 for me will be dedicated to hitting the reset button on my preparations, my expectations, and my confidence. I've even got a new profile pic for this new cycle - my smiley dog who always cheers me up. 

Wishing a Very Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours! 

Joy and Darcy - Looking to you for some BFPs this month! I hope the holiday is a good distraction for you during your TWW. 

Fmorris - Didn't you get sick during this past cycle? I thought I remembered that you did. I had a nasty cold right at the beginning and I'm fairly certain that is what lengthened my cycle this month. Plus, the stress of your DPs broken leg could have contributed. 

Scorpio, please move me to Taking A Break.

[sotohana]

Fmorris- that would totally be awesome if they had a black Friday sale for fertility stuff! Who knows- maybe Amazon will have a discount on all items or something.

Sphinxy- I'm thinking of you. May this break be just what you need.  Also, I echo your sentiments. This Thanksgiving I am so thankful for everyone on this board. It really is a safe haven for me and makes me feel less alone, which is huge.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

[pokeyAC]

Happy Thanksgiving to you too, Sphinxy!  I know what you mean about not having friends IRL going through the same thing.  None of our friends here have children or are going to be trying soon.  It has been so wonderful to have everyone here for advice and support.  I'm sorry about your BFN, but it sounds like you have a good plan going forward.  Unfortunately, BFN cycles can be great learning experiences.

AFM - I have some ovulation and pregnancy tests I don't think I will be using before they expire.  If you would like them, please send me a PM with your address, and I will send them to you.  Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

[mrsandmrs]

aw, sphinxy, i'm sorry to hear that. i'm a big believer in data - it helps you see patterns and the "big picture." take care of yourself over the holiday.I have some friends that were TTC with me, but they are all pregnant now.......   it's good and bad to have friends going through it with you. 

sotohana - i am thinking about going too, not to get hitched myself, but just for the circus and energy of it. 

fille - having access to all that data makes me obsessive too. i love/hate that you can search with such refined criteria. 

AFM my follistim and trigger shot arrived. it was thankfully anonymous and confidential. blank white box with this label: 

now i just have to twiddle my thumbs and wait for AF to show.... 

[easttowest]

Oh, pokey, you have reminded me that we have some too!

Cheap internet OPK strips and a package of rather expensive First Response pregnancy tests.  Wouldn't want them to go to waste!  

Happy Thanksgiving everyone who celebrates!

[fmorris28]

sphinxy, I agree with being thankful for all the ladies here. I would be super lost if not having help here. i didnt get sick, just the sick nauseous feeling. Who knows?! So she's officially 4 days M.I.A. normally i'd be wrapping it up right now! ugh!

Sotohana, One can only hope amazon will get hip to it nd do a 50% off!

M&M, isnt it exciting when you're meds or something comes for you! It starts even more excitement! Good luck!

AFM, Still waiting for AF...love how shes never late..atleast by 4 days. This. . .i can't explain!

[redrockband]

Thanks for the support everyone! It is an exciting time and although it seemed like it took forever to get here, things are really starting to look up and move forward for us. 

So sorry about the BFN Sphinxy..it sounds like you have a good plan moving ahead. Enjoy the break and the holidays. 

Welcome filefantome, and happy TWW. It's great that you got to do a trial run and even if the timing wasn't perfect it's always good to practice :)

scorpio: yay for good health! Good luck with the donor contract...I was thinking of having a law school friend help us out with ours, but our one friend in law school is well...in law school and thus really busy.

It is interesting to hear how everyone picks donors. When we originally talked about using a bank, we were going to switch donors when we switched wombs and have the donor resemble the one not carrying in personality and looks as much as possible. Now our KD is very different from both of us, and looks more like me with dark hair and eyes. 

mrs: glad the shipment arrived confidentially, with my luck it would come with stickers and writing all over. I've actually had dreams about this with shipping sperm to my office

joy: good luck with the TWW, fingers are crossed for you

AFM: just getting ready to do some last minute thanksgiving shopping, just picked up our family farm raised bird and then we're making pumpkin and pecan pies tonight. My dad and stepmom raised their own turkey, which they "harvested" on sunday...A whopping 38 lbs. I feel bad about eating him, which makes me think maybe I should go back to a vegetarian diet. Happy thanksgiving to everyone who is celebrating! 

[scorpioma]

wow, everyone- this board is hoppin'!  

Okay- so we need someone to volunteer to be the threadkeeper for December. Anyone interested? :)

Thinking of you who are in the TWW! Sending fertile vibes!  *joyseattle* *fillefantome*

I feel like SO many of us are on the same "cycle"... We are all starting AF around now, yes? Funny!

Sphinxy: I loved your "thankful" words- I can relate, while I know many queer people with kids, this board is a life line during this crazy process! you have been refreshingly honest & genuine and vulnerable here, and I am really grateful for that. and what a ridiculously cute dog you have. I love that face! We have two at home, as well. Will you be sticking around the board when you take a break? we should talk on the phone sometime!

sotohana: Sounds like MY mom. HA! your post made me laugh out loud... we should have a crazy mothers commiseration sometime!

afm:

Thanks to everyone for the congratulations on our KD. So as I mentioned, the STI/health tests are PERFECT, we just have not had the chance to do any semen analysis testing because our KD is out of state and the holidays are so busy. We are going to go ahead and inseminate this month without the semen analysis and he will get it done asap, so that by January we will know. I just don't want to skip a cycle, when every month counts (because of school/fgraduation/maternity leave planning around the semester schedule) and there is so much flexibility with this KD... 

My birthday was Nov. 20, and also CD1! (not YAY for period on my birthday, but I love a fresh new chart). I will start temping again tomorrow.

[DarcySD]

Sphinxy: I am so so sorry to hear your news. I had my wife read your post and we both appreciate your words. I told her it usually takes around 6 tries for most people and she is kind of freaking out about potential costs. How did you and your dp plan for this?

I am thankful for the holiday distraction during this waiting process. We are visiting my inlaws for 5 days and it's nice to be on a little vacation so I can spoil myself. I plan on doing a lot of shopping, eating and relaxing until we drive back on Sunday. My plan is to test either Sunday night or Monday morning. That will only be 10 or 11 dpiui. My period is due the following Tuesday so we will see.

[scorpioma]

DarcySD: are you in the two week wait?

Shall I add you to that section in the beginning of the thread? So sorry I missed this!

FX!!

[DarcySD]

Scorpioma - yes that would be great - thank you!

[fmorris28]

scoripio, you're def. right about being on the same cycle lol! I second that! Hey happy belated birthday too! I'm getting back to the temping as well! i need a good glow in the dark thermometer lol! good luck!

afm, AF decided to start today...still tryna get DP back in the mood to try but boy is she a toughie! i would have thought i'd be the hesitant one after a BFN, but i was wrong! Any ideas??

[fillefantome]

Scorpioma, I'll be happy to be December's threadkeeper, if you're willing to walk me through how to do it.

Also, just wanted to say that I love a fresh new chart as well. In fact, I've been charting for the last three years on FF (temping about 12 months on and off of that time), and I'm with granite--it feels like a science project I can do on my own body. I mean, since I was 12 I've been going from period to period just thinking, "well, I bleed about once a month," but not really knowing why or when to expect my period . Now, thanks to my very own personal science experiment, I know that my cycle length varies by more than a week, and if it's a month when I'm temping, I can pinpoint when my period will start within a day. This is both incredibly satisfying and saves me from a lot of bloody clothing and embarrassment. Of course, when you're temping, but not insem-ing, the stakes are very different, so my feelings may change as I go through the TWW from month to month.

mrsandmrs, frankly, if I saw that label on a box being delivered to my neighbor, I'd be certain they were receiving body parts or something. Confidential and in need of refrigeration? Yikes!

AFM, I had a quiet little Thanksgiving by myself. I actually just started an elimination diet because I've been having some serious and continuous intestinal woes over the past few months, and while it might just (!) be because of the Metformin, I want to try and see if I have some intolerance that's making things worse. So, on Thanksgiving, I stayed home and roasted my first ever chicken with sweet potatoes, squash, garlic and onions. (I don't cook much, so this whole thing is a pretty daunting prospect.) It turned out really well, and is making for some yummy leftovers. I'm not sure if I should really be doing an elimination diet during the TWW, since supposedly, toxins are released when you stop ingesting all the junk that you routinely eat. Also, you typically do lose weight doing this (side effect, not goal), and I know that in the short term, weight loss can inhibit fertility. So, anyway, as of today, it's effectively just been a couple days of really healthy paleo eating. Anyone have any thoughts on whether I should hold off on doing the full-on elimination diet until another time?

I'm now at CD21 and FF still won't grant me crosshairs, but I'm fairly certain I O'ed on CD17, so that means I insem'ed 3 days before O. Not awesome timing, but possible. I'm determined not to fret (hah) and not to test until after my period is due the first weekend in December. We'll see how that goes....

[Twomommyfamily]

Hi! We are new to Mothering. My partner and I are just beginning the process of ttc with an anonymous donor. I'm 34 and she is 30 and I will be carrying this first baby. We would definitely be in the realm of waiting to be ready. I've been taking my bbt for the last 8 months and using OPK to determine if/when I O. My lp is reliably 9 days max with my cycle usually only 23 days. I tried vitex, red raspberry, and B6 for several months and nothing changed. We were going to try to do ICI at home, but with my lp so short we decided to go ahead and see the RE. We had our first appointment this week then yesterday did the day 3 blood work. She also scheduled me for an HSG in December just to make sure everything is in working order down there before we start. She said we could do IUI with natural cycles and without testing or meds or do the testing and then control for the timing with meds, which is what we ended up going with. Anyways, we are traveling to see my partner's family for the holidays in Boston then that first cycle in January is when we will start this! We are excited and looking forward to meeting some new friends on here who are in the same boat! 

Angie