mixed feelings on nightweaning 19 month old

[blagh]

I have a 19 month old and a 3 year old. They both have their own beds (mattresses on the floor). They both need us to snuggle them to sleep every night. 3yo usually sleeps OK, DH is usually on night duty for him. 19mo needs to nurse frequently most nights. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand I love it. It gives me such sweet cuddly happy feelings. I kiss his soft head, and we snuggle back to sleep. But some nights he just keeps nursing and nursing -- or using me as a pacifier. And some nights the 3yo needs me and only me, so I am bouncing back and forth between their rooms. I work during the day so I'm often quite tired. And I get precious little time to myself. We've had a series of extremely stressful events since 19mo was born, and I think I need more time to heal and care for myself. One way might be to get 19mo to sleep better at night. But then I remember that he won't be a toddler for long! And this is my special time with him.

So I end up being very inconsistent, probably the worst thing I can do. I nurse and snuggle him to bed at night, but if I'm just tired of being used as a pacifier I unlatch him and let him cry (right next to me, of course). Other nights when I'm happy to have the quiet snuggle time with him, I let him go as long as he likes.

Oh btw this is my first post here. This community of moms seems to be really aligned with my parenting style and beliefs -- I love reading all your posts!

Does anyone have any thoughts or comments about this?

-Anne

[skycheattraffic]

I have a 19 month old girl and aside from teething/illness she doesn't usually stay latched for extended periods of time. There are times though when nursing just doesn't quite do it and she needs a little water to quench her thirst. I keep a sippy within arm's reach and if she can't stay asleep without the breast in her mouth or pops off and fusses, I offer her the sippy. Usually that means she takes a few gulps and just melts. It does have a disadvantage of course: if she drinks a lot then I have to change her diaper at least once. With the colder weather though she takes less and it's usually just a mouthful or two. If your DS is interested, I'd offer a bit of water in a sippy to see if that sooths him and lets him relax. Hth

[blagh]

Thanks, skycheattraffic, good idea! I tried offering him a sippy last night and he just shook his head no -- but then again, he slept fabulously, only woke up twice, nursed for a while, unlatched and rolled back over to sleep. I'll try to remember to keep the sippy in there just in case.