Charting To Avoid-FAM/NFP November 2012 - Page 2

[mt_gooseberry]

Originally Posted by JoyFilled 

I feel like I landed on the right page here today!  My doctor is sending me to see a gyno because I am 14 months pp and no period.  I work all day and only nurse 3 times a day.  I am overweight.  I didn't have a period between my 2 kids which puts my last period in May 2008.  I would love to chart but the last thing I want is to be pregnant right now.  I am waiting on my cheap tests in the mail.

It is nice to read some other people are like me.

I don't really think this is all that abnormal.  There are some women who don't get AF back until a few weeks after they have completely weaned, and if there is any nipple stimulation AT ALL it will continue to delay the return.  I am also 14mo pp w/no AF so far and w/no AF in between!  I haven't had one since Feb. 2008, b/c I have PCOS and had a long cycle when I conceived my first.  Unfortunately, many doctors, even OBGYNs and specialists, are really ignorant when it comes to breastfeeding and women's cycles.  When I was trying to figure out what was going on with me when I started experiencing the symptoms of PCOS, they all just wanted to give me hormones to induce a period or put me on BC instead of trying to actually figure out what was wrong and treat that.  Soooo many gynos these days just hand out the Pill for every issue, thus covering up the symptoms instead of treating the cause. 

And that is my rant for the day!  Good luck! 

[pickle18]

JoyFilled - I agree with mt_gooseberry - that doesn't sound unusual.  Some women get AF back right away despite ecological breastfeeding, and some don't until they completely wean.  That said, I totally understand the pregnancy worries - they hit me hard, too!  Hope all is well!

AFM - I felt horrible yesterday.  Too tired to move, nauseous, just the pits.  Got very little done.  Super emotional - crying over everything.  I noticed DS was drinking ALOT of almond milk, juice and water.  Then last night, he woke up crying in the early am because he kept trying to nurse back to sleep, but wasn't getting any milk. He actually got up and was crying, pointing at the door (to head to the fridge) - finally, some milk let down and I heard him swallowing - then he fell right asleep. Poor lil dude.  That was the.last.straw. 

I was so upset.  DH had already said (when he saw I was feeling crappy) that it was time to pull the plug on the pill - this only confirmed it for him.  So (drum roll please...) off we go, into full-time charting!   And going to the store to get some more fenugreek tea, in the meantime.

(oh, and no, I'm not pregnant - tested this morning just to be safe! )

[lactatinggirl]

So sorry about the rough night Pickle! Hope your supply comes back quickly. I had good luck with More Milk Plus when I needed a boost. 

AFM- I still haven't ovulated yet. Day 34 of my cycle now with no temp shift at all. Oh well, it'll eventually come. :-/

[pickle18]

Thanks, lactatinggirl - I'm sorry you are stuck in such a long waiting game.    Hope you see a temp shift soon - though you seem to be handling it with more patience than I would!  Or, I would be the one to finally give up and assume it's not coming, throw caution to the wind, and...make a baby. 

Well, I have some cautiously optimistic news to report - I didn't take my mini-pill last night (hooray!) and by today, I've already noticed an increase in supply!  Of course, I did drink some fenugreek yesterday - drinking that while on the pill has helped a bit, but has never been this successful.  And...I got my first patch of creamy today since PPAF, which is something! (albeit, something to be veeerrrry cautious about )

How's everyone else doing?

[JoyFilled]

Well after everything I said I have had 2 days of light (like I don't need a pad even) bleeding.  I am going to guess that this AF.  I did have a month of mucus that could have been fertile.

My doctor called today and said the gyno said not to worry until 4 month after completely stopping nursing about getting my cycle back.  

MT_G - I know what you are saying about 14 months not being that abnormal but everyone I know restarted at 6 months.  However, I am one of the few people I know who co-sleep.

So, now I have to figure out the charting.  Does anyone just use mucus?  I haven't used temperature before.

[lactatinggirl]

Originally Posted by pickle18 

Thanks, lactatinggirl - I'm sorry you are stuck in such a long waiting game.    Hope you see a temp shift soon - though you seem to be handling it with more patience than I would!  Or, I would be the one to finally give up and assume it's not coming, throw caution to the wind, and...make a baby. 

We use the pull out method when I'm potentially fertile, which means it's not as fun, but also makes me less likely to throw caution to the wind. :-P I am certainly getting tired of it though! 

I may have had a temp shift today. Problem is, I'm sick. So who knows if it's because of ovulation or because I have a minor fever. Ugh! Guess I'll know once I start getting better and the high temps stick or don't. 

[mt_gooseberry]

Originally Posted by JoyFilled 

So, now I have to figure out the charting.  Does anyone just use mucus?  I haven't used temperature before.

I use mucus-only; Creighton is my method.  Mucus-only can be very effective, but you have to be a lot more detail-specific than when you use the temp crosscheck.  You can't just use the mucus instruction from the STM and get a high success rate.  I can only recommend you take a class.  Luckily, mucus-only classes tend to be very flexible.  I did mine long-distance, over the phone and via email.  We're low-income and my instructor waived her fees.  All of our meetings were on my schedule.  The other mucus-only method is Billings.  Their classes are done in a similar way to Creighton.  If you are interested, I can help hook you up with an instructor!  It is easy to learn, but very detailed.  

[HulaJenn]

well still no AF for me. Went to emerge with pain and he said I likely have an ovarian cyst. Following up with an u/s on monday. Anyone have experience with cysts?

[pickle18]

Originally Posted by lactatinggirl 

We use the pull out method when I'm potentially fertile, which means it's not as fun, but also makes me less likely to throw caution to the wind. :-P I am certainly getting tired of it though! 

I may have had a temp shift today. Problem is, I'm sick. So who knows if it's because of ovulation or because I have a minor fever. Ugh! Guess I'll know once I start getting better and the high temps stick or don't. 

That is likely what we will do, too - but you're totally right, not as fun!  Sorry to hear you are sick - hopefully you will get well fast, but your temps will stay up! (well, not indefinitely, haha)

Originally Posted by HulaJenn 

well still no AF for me. Went to emerge with pain and he said I likely have an ovarian cyst. Following up with an u/s on monday. Anyone have experience with cysts?

Oh no sorry to hear that HulaJenn!  At least you have a plausible explanation - sometimes that helps me, I know.  I've never had one, but my sister and mom have - I just know they are no fun.  I hope it's small and goes away quickly.  Good luck with your u/s!

[JoyFilled]

mt_g - We already took a course but right now I can't remember which one it is.  I used it for a year but I really wanted to get pregnant so it didn't matter as much.  I am just all over the map with my period and could not really predict anything.   My general rule has been no sex if any mucus and 3 days after.  A little conservative.

[LionessMom]

I have had cysts. Have one on each side right now. Most of the time I just get pinching pains. No big deal. But one time it hurt so bad I went to the er. They wouldn't give me anything or do anything. It was over quick.

[HeatherB]

Hi, mamas,

Looking for support as I, reluctantly start the CTA phase of life. My DD turns 2 tomorrow and I've not yet had PPAF (she still nurses a bunch, though less lately). But, in the last few days I've seen some EWCM. After my last two babies, I had anovulatory periods for several months, so this was really unexpected. I'm not sure if it's necessarily ovulation or if it's possible varying meds/supps could be affecting it. :/ I haven't worried about fertility in quite a while so I'm not even sure what DOES potentially affect CM!

I'd love thoughts on this... I've had twinges on my lower left side at three different times in the last 2-3 weeks. It's occurred to me that it could be O pain but really feels like something muscular. Being that it's returned, always on the same side, within a span of days or weeks, it really can't be O pain, right? I had a vision of shooting out tons of eggs with how many times I've felt it. I do generally have a sensation of O'ing but I'm just not sure that's what this is.

I'm figuring I need to assume fertility, anyway, right now with the patches of EWCM, watery CM, and a pretty dark OPK - not as dark as the control, but very clearly there. I was hoping if the EWCM was Friday night that we'd be "clear" by now but took the OPK (and an HPT! ) just in case, and was not too thrilled to see such a dark line on the OPK. How long do you ladies assume fertility lasts after EWCM?

So, we have 4 and DH and I are in agreement that any more children (right now, at least - that's me speaking) would be a BAD idea for us and our family. We have enough stress and strain from various directions as it is and DH does NOT cope with it well. Hence CTA. I have, in the past, mostly charted CM. I'm wondering if I need to get more serious about using temps. I've thought, for years, that I should get a LadyComp/BabyComp - is there something better/less expensive these days? I like the idea of a device that DH can see and know what's going on, too. I can't have the sole weight of TTA on my shoulders and finding time to actually discuss it may be a challenge!

What is everyone else doing to TTA? I really can't think of anything I'm comfortable with other than abstaining around fertile times - not that that seems like any fun. I just really wish I knew exactly what was going on! So hard to know without an actual PPAF. :/

Anyway, I knew I'd find some mamas in a similar spot here. I will need the support 'cause I'm not too thrilled to be in this spot!

[slammerkin]

Can I join? Here's my chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/405e2a (nothing there yet - waiting for AF to start)

DH and I are planning to start TTC around April, if everything goes according to plan. We're hoping to be into our first house by March and that's the main goal before TTC. I just finished a pack of pills and am not going to start a new one to give my body time to get back into the swing of things. I also want to get familiar with charting before we really start using it for TTC. I'm looking forward to charting for these next few months! I'm 29 and I've been on and off birth control pills since I was 16 - consistently on them the last three years. But my periods were always regular during the times I was off, so hopefully everything will just get right back to normal. :)

[lactatinggirl]

Originally Posted by pickle18 

That is likely what we will do, too - but you're totally right, not as fun!  Sorry to hear you are sick - hopefully you will get well fast, but your temps will stay up! (well, not indefinitely, haha)

Haha FAM humor! I actually laughed. In all seriousness though, oh man I don't want to be pregnant right now. :-P 

So now I'm having AF. It's been a few days, so I'm guessing it's not breakthrough bleeding. The only thing I could really call a temp shift would be right before it started, so I'm guessing this is an inovulatory cycle? Is that normal when you start cycling again PP? 

[mt_gooseberry]

Originally Posted by HulaJenn 

well still no AF for me. Went to emerge with pain and he said I likely have an ovarian cyst. Following up with an u/s on monday. Anyone have experience with cysts?

Yeah, I get them.  I had them really bad for a while in high school.  I sat out of gym for a whole semester because the pain was excruciating with exercise.  It's when they rupture that they hurt the worst, and I was told that the pain lingers until your body reabsorbs the fluid from the ruptured cyst (which accounts for my own symptoms).  They recommended going on birth control, but I resisted and they got better on their own.  I still occassionally get twinges, but nothing like it used to be.

Originally Posted by HeatherB 

Hi, mamas,
Looking for support as I, reluctantly start the CTA phase of life. My DD turns 2 tomorrow and I've not yet had PPAF (she still nurses a bunch, though less lately). But, in the last few days I've seen some EWCM. After my last two babies, I had anovulatory periods for several months, so this was really unexpected. I'm not sure if it's necessarily ovulation or if it's possible varying meds/supps could be affecting it. :/ I haven't worried about fertility in quite a while so I'm not even sure what DOES potentially affect CM!
I'd love thoughts on this... I've had twinges on my lower left side at three different times in the last 2-3 weeks. It's occurred to me that it could be O pain but really feels like something muscular. Being that it's returned, always on the same side, within a span of days or weeks, it really can't be O pain, right? I had a vision of shooting out tons of eggs with how many times I've felt it. I do generally have a sensation of O'ing but I'm just not sure that's what this is.
I'm figuring I need to assume fertility, anyway, right now with the patches of EWCM, watery CM, and a pretty dark OPK - not as dark as the control, but very clearly there. I was hoping if the EWCM was Friday night that we'd be "clear" by now but took the OPK (and an HPT! ) just in case, and was not too thrilled to see such a dark line on the OPK. How long do you ladies assume fertility lasts after EWCM?
So, we have 4 and DH and I are in agreement that any more children (right now, at least - that's me speaking) would be a BAD idea for us and our family. We have enough stress and strain from various directions as it is and DH does NOT cope with it well. Hence CTA. I have, in the past, mostly charted CM. I'm wondering if I need to get more serious about using temps. I've thought, for years, that I should get a LadyComp/BabyComp - is there something better/less expensive these days? I like the idea of a device that DH can see and know what's going on, too. I can't have the sole weight of TTA on my shoulders and finding time to actually discuss it may be a challenge!
What is everyone else doing to TTA? I really can't think of anything I'm comfortable with other than abstaining around fertile times - not that that seems like any fun. I just really wish I knew exactly what was going on! So hard to know without an actual PPAF. :/
Anyway, I knew I'd find some mamas in a similar spot here. I will need the support 'cause I'm not too thrilled to be in this spot!

Peak day, or the day of highest fertility is generally defined (at least with my method) as the last day of fertile-type mucus, even if it isn't of the greatest quantity or quality.  Then you are supposed to wait until the evening of the fourth day after that until you are safe.  I think some methods use Peak + 3 days, but if you want to be really safe I would use P + 4.

As far as a fertility device, the Marquette method uses the ClearBlue Fertility Monitor along with mucus observations.  I don't know if it is more/less expensive, but it seems to be a pretty reliable method.  I would definitely check out their website!  http://nfp.marquette.edu

Originally Posted by slammerkin 

Can I join? Here's my chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/405e2a (nothing there yet - waiting for AF to start)

DH and I are planning to start TTC around April, if everything goes according to plan. We're hoping to be into our first house by March and that's the main goal before TTC. I just finished a pack of pills and am not going to start a new one to give my body time to get back into the swing of things. I also want to get familiar with charting before we really start using it for TTC. I'm looking forward to charting for these next few months! I'm 29 and I've been on and off birth control pills since I was 16 - consistently on them the last three years. But my periods were always regular during the times I was off, so hopefully everything will just get right back to normal. :)

Welcome, welcome!

Originally Posted by lactatinggirl 

Haha FAM humor! I actually laughed. In all seriousness though, oh man I don't want to be pregnant right now. :-P 

So now I'm having AF. It's been a few days, so I'm guessing it's not breakthrough bleeding. The only thing I could really call a temp shift would be right before it started, so I'm guessing this is an inovulatory cycle? Is that normal when you start cycling again PP? 

Probably annovulatory, and very normal.

[pickle18]

HeatherB - welcome! That sounds like it could be your body revving back up to O to me.  I had a few months of EWCM and "false starts" where the machinery was sort of getting going again, prior to PPAF.  I'm sorry you are having some sadness around TTA - that is tough.  Since alot of it is for DH's benefit anyway, involving him seems like a good idea, for both of you (he'll feel more secure, you won't feel the pressure alone, and maybe it will carve out a little more talk time).  It certainly sounds like you are one busy mama!

slammerkin - welcome!  Lots of new, exciting things on the horizon for you it sounds like - awesome!

lactatinggirl - yeah, I'm a dork, haha   Glad you at least have that cycle behind you - hope they get more normal next time!

AFM - I need another temp to tell for sure, but based on CM and what I have so far, my chart looks like getting off the pill triggered O pretty quickly.  That is making me really happy as a charting newbie, because I can see what's going on.    I'm hooked - although a bit in awe that it happened just like that. I don't know why this always surprises me - it did when I got pg immediately after quitting bc (chemical, though - but 2nd cycle was DS!).  I think since I've been on pills or Depo for years at a time, I get really blasé about it...and then I get a wake-up call - you really do have to be careful, no matter what method you use! 

[JMJ]

Lactatinggirl, that sounds like a probably anovulatory cycle, though if you do not have confirmed ovulation, days of bleeding are not considered to be infertile (though if they are followed by dry days, the dry days are considered to be infertile).

[JoyFilled]

How do people communicate with their partner when an okay day is for sex and when it is not?  I hate telling my husband "okay today's a good day if you want" it seems wrong.  I was thinking of hanging something up that was red on one side and green on the other and just flipping it depending on my signs.  DH is terrified of getting me pregnant and so I think he just doesn't try.  Plus we would do stuff just not sex on the red days if we both knew.  It is just awkward to talk about.

[pickle18]

Since we don't abstain, it's a little easier to say, "Oh, hey, btw - we need to be extra careful today!" (wow, that rhymed - too many children's books! )  I haven't found any of it awkward to talk about, except he REALLY does not want to hear about cm, haha. 

I like the idea of an adult game of "red light, green light" though!  You could even just verbalize it - "Guess what's awesome??? Today is a green light day!" Or, you could incorporate it into the heat of the moment, letting him know it's a red light day, buuuutttt here's why those are still fun.   He could even ask you something as simple as "green or red?" so he knows what's up.  Makes it a little more fun, and a little less awkward than, "Hey babe, we need to decide who's picking up the kid from daycare, who is getting the laundry from the dry cleaners, and oh yeah - I'm fertile today, so be careful!" over morning coffee, haha (although, I could totally see this happening in my house ).

[JMJ]

One of the things I love about NFP is the communication that you get out of it. It's a bit awkward at first, but you do develop a way of talking about it that's comfortable for you both. I keep my husband updated on my signs. I let him know when something changes, so like if I see CM at the start of my fertile phase, I let him know about it asap, before I get caught turning him down when he's making a move. I keep him updated throughout the fertile phase so that we can anticipate together the coming of the infertile phase, so he'll know when we're in the clear. If he's ever not sure, he just asks before he gets his hopes up. It becomes somewhat of a pick-up line but leaves me room to say no. I usually don't say no directly, but instead, I'll get out my chart and show him where I'm at... giving details about how likely I think getting pregnant is along with comparing my signs to the objective rules, sometimes guessing as to when I'm likely to be infertile again. Then, it's not a yes or no answer, but a mutual decision whether to accept that probability of conceiving a child together right now. This is really nice for me because it's not my responsibility to say yes or no and to hold all the responsibility for mistakes, either turning him down weeks before ovulation actually comes or ending up pregnant when I said I was infertile. It's also a good time to talk about how important it is to continue to not get pregnant or if it might be time for another. There's nothing like acknowledging that if we had sex right now, it's likely that I could get pregnant. If we have a really serious reason to avoid pregnancy right now, all those thoughts about the consequences that we would have to face tend to do a really good job at helping you want to keep your pants on (provided you have this discussion before things get too steamy).