Any over 35 Mamas Having Baby #1? « Back to Group Discussions

[helenh]

I'm interested to know how many in our group are over 35 and having their first baby.  Also, interested to know if you're planning for hospital/birthing center, OB/Midwife, etc...

I'd love to have a natural birth at a birthing center but worried about complications and last-minute changes to a hospital.  I want some freedom of choice and I want to be in control but I want resources available should the need arise.

[pokeyAC]

Hello!  I'm 37 and this is my first.  We haven't decided where to have the birth yet.  I am leaning towards home, and my wife is leaning towards the hospital because it would cost more than twice as much to have it at home because my insurance does not cover homebirth.  An extra $2000 would allow us to do a lot of other things like stay home longer with the baby.  I think part of me is afraid something will change towards the end of pregnancy and I will have to switch to a hospital birth if I start planning a homebirth.  We live 2 blocks from the hospital so I would feel safer at home than at a birth center which is further away.  I also would like to not be in the car while in labor.  I'm going to consult with a few folks and maybe take a tour, and I hope that will help me decide.  I hate that money has to be a factor in the decision.

[FreeRangeMama]

I am 36 and still will be when the babe is born (I conceived on my birthday weekend ).  This will be baby #5 and will be a homebirth with a midwife.  This will be new for me.  #1 was a hospital birth and #2-4 were UC.  I will not willingly give birth at a hospital, it would have to be a pretty big emergency for me to choose that route.  I LOVE giving birth at home.  It feels so natural to add to our family in the place our family calls home 
 

[JNajla]

Yup!  I'm 36, and will turn 37 about a month before baby is due.  I feel great and have no concerns- this is our first baby!  I was ambivalent about pregnancy and being a mom (wasn't sure if I had it in me to multi-task with career and being a mom) but I'm sure that everything will be just fine. 

[JNajla]

Forgot to add that I chose an OB/GYN and will deliver at the hospital.  It is all that we can afford (insurance reasons). 

[pokeyAC]

Welcome and Congratulations JNajla!

[jentifer]

I'm 36, going to be 37 a week before the EDD. We'd both like a homebirth - DH's mothers were both midwives and I'm not a big fan of hospitals. We may end up using a birth center or hospital, though, depending on how much home birth would cost since our insurance doesn't cover it.

[goldingoddess]

I'm really sorry, but I'm thread crashing.

I couldn't help but comment that if the only thing keeping you from a HB is money (not questioning whether it is right for you, etc.)  I will attest to the fact that homebirth care is worth every single penny.  We had to REALLY scrimp and save for our first two homebirths, but it was worth the cuts in other areas of the budgets.  Also, I noticed you both are in the bay area (I'm in Hayward)  most midwives are willing to work on a sliding scale for clients that are truly in need of modification.  Check out the Bay Area Homebirth Collective:)

Again, sorry for the thread crashing!

[edythe]

hello. i am 40 (will be 41 in a month) and this is my first. :)

well, i hope it's my first, anyway. what i mean by that is i had my first prenatal appt last Wed and they didn't see anything on the (transvaginal) ultrasound. my husband and i were still too excited to really react negatively to that and my OB/GYN said, well, it's not quite visible yet (or something like that). my husband asked if this was normal and she said yes. and she really didn't look concerned or alarmed. however, after doing a lot of google research and talking to friends, we are preparing for a blighted ovum... but still hoping that just maybe it's ok.(I was nine weeks last week.)

sorry to be a downer. anyway, not much to do until the next appt on the 21st (i'll be 11 weeks).

ok, so, as for the type of birth i'd like to have: i'd like to try for as natural a birth as possible. i did my research and found an ob/gyn who is very pro-natural. but i probably will stick with the hospital route (Cedars Sinai, in Los Angeles). Maybe i will change my mind once we start the Bradley classes; i'm not sure. Cost is an issue, yes. I'm hoping that I'll be able to wait to go to the hospital until i'm pretty far along. i have also considered a doula, but, again, the money is an issue.

Hope i get to stay in this due date club. And so far I win the prize for the oldest, i think. 

polly

[GoGetumTiger]

Me.  I'm 36 and still will be when the kid arrives ( ~June 1).  This is our first.

I picked an OB practice that is an hour from our house because I heard that the doctors (and staff at the hospital they deliver at) are super supportive of moms wanting natural birth with as few interventions as possible.  I'll be using hypnosis.  I originally wanted to go to a birth center, but it is not covered by our insurance, and honestly I'm comfortable enough with the feedback I've gotten from other ladies about the OB/hospital I've chosen. 

In my delivery fantasy, I envision me squatting in the living room with just my mom and husband there ... but it's really almost borderline ridiculous for me to ever consider seriously.  I'm a worry-wort that's prone to panic attacks.  Maybe with the second one (if we have a second one) I'll be brave enough to plan for a midwife-assisted home birth, but for now this chicken will be in a hospital (and probably annoying the staff by telling them NO a lot).

Oh, and my doctor is still undecided if she's going to have me see the high-risk OB in addition to my visits with her.  I'm fat, but I didn't have diabetes or high blood pressure going into the pregnancy, so she's basing it only on my age.  This seems extra ridiculous to me since I still get asked what college I go to ... I am not old.  36 is NOT old.  I wish they'd stop acting like I'm geriatric and crusty.  If I hear one more person "remind" me about how I'm at risk for Down's Syndrome, I will seriously consider throwing up on them.

[edythe]

i'm sorry, gogetumTiger, that you're getting too many reminders of  your "advanced maternal age," as they say. that sucks. i wondered what my OB (and her staff) was going to say about it, but so far nothing. but i've only had the first appt so far. perhaps she's waiting to get into the heavier stuff once she's sure my pregnancy is really a go. (see my prev post). but i was really happy not to get a lecture about the risks right off the bat.

anyway, 36 is certainly not old. and these days it doesn't even seem old to be having a baby. seems quite youthful to me. :)

p

[spotty4]

I am 34 at the moment but I will be 35 by EDD.  This is baby #1.  My birthday is in May so I juuuuuuuust nip into the advanced maternal age category.  Since this is baby #1 and we have no idea what we are doing we are working w/ an obgyn and will having a traditional hospital birth (also b/c of insurance coverage).

[aubin10]

I'm 37 and will be 38 when I deliver. This is my first child and I'm planning a natural childbirth in a hospital-based birthing center. My OB is very supportive of my birth plan and since I'm healthy overall, hasn't really treated me as an advanced maternal age patient.  

[Erica13]

Wow! sounds like there are a lot of us first time moms over age 35. :) I just turned 36 last week. We haven't decided yet where we will have the baby - we're living in Jordan for my husband's work. There is an excellent women's hospital here that is set up with private rooms similar to hotel suites in Amman, Jordan. My doctor studied in England, and she even found a Swedish lady who is trained and attended a recent birth with the doctor to be my doula. (Doula's aren't usually used here in Jordan.) We are still considering going back to the US for the birth, but aren't sure yet. If we had the baby in the US, I would love to have both a midwife and back-up doctor using a birthing center. Home birth sounds wonderful, but I'm not sure about it for my first baby. It sounds safer to do a hospital birth for the first. I would love to have a water birth, but haven't researched yet if they are available here in Jordan or in the birthing center that I'm considering using in the US.

[pokeyAC]

Welcome Erica and Congratulations!