Is this your first baby? - Page 3 « Back to Group Discussions

[phobiageek]

Thanks! I understand getting tired again towards the end of pregnancy but glad there is a small window of renewed energy.

[kolszewski]

here we are: Why are you so focused on bed sharing? It is ok not to! If you want to room share, that is a great way to have baby close but not in your bed. This will be my 4th and I assume that we will try the same thing again. Baby sleeps in a bassinet next to our bed and I bring baby into bed to nurse at night. When baby finishes, back to the bassinet. Occassionally, we both fall asleep but if you are at all concerned about safety, you can sit and nurse then put baby back in a safe place. A pack n play works great or a side carred crib before baby starts moving. It is totally ok to use a crib with all four sides! You and baby will both adjust to waking up, nursing, going back to bed. Safety (and that includes you getting enough sleep!) is the top priority!

[kolszewski]

Bras: Underwires don't seem to bother me. Once baby is born, I do wear a non underwire until about 6 weeks postpartum. By then, my milk is really established and I can wear underwires again. Although, I should say, I have never had clogged ducts, mastitis, etc. Maybe some people are more prone and I can see underwires being a problem.

[dayiscoming2006]

Originally Posted by here we are 

Dayiscoming, i am wondering more about your sleeping arrangements , if you want to share. I am trying to imagine what may or may not work for me. I think I am outthinking myself, when I look up the option its confusing and complicated for me. Its frustrating to spend so much time and feel so lost. I am a toss and turning sleeper who pulls blankets all night and have very active dreams (&nightmares:( often) . I want to be as close as possible, but i can only imagine being so exhausted. I am already a very tired type now, so here i am worrying again. I want to simplify this. Anyone who wants to share their experiences, i will appreciate it so much, but i might ask you too many questions in return . I need to find my confidence with this, and with everything, thats a BIG everything. Sidecarring a crib if it will fit? That sounds like it will work for until the baby starts moving? Then putting the fourth side up on the crib is the only choice? Meaning you need to get up everytime and pull them out to nurse, which could be unsettling? I started another thread about what can be user to slide open and shut from when your lying down, but it seems to be uninvented and some people trust it to stay without the fourth side. But are they just very aware of baby? I think i am getting depressed thinking about how to deal with this, as far away as it may seem. I dont want sleep deprivation, which sounds inevitable. I dont want to always get up and down, i dont want to always pull a heavy baby out of the crib (and what if this upsets him/her) to not be closer to me. I just dont know what i will do. I didnt want to get upset again, but i just had to see what others are doing to make this smooth.

As far as sleeping arrangements, I cannot sleep in the same room with a baby because they tend to make a lot of little noises when they sleep in my experience and I'm a VERY light sleeper. I do have my husband sleep in the same room with baby and I usually sleep in the living room for the first 2-3 months or so. After that, I feel more comfortable moving them into their own room. My babies have thrived on this. To each their own. I swaddle my babies as well as I find they startle themselves too much in their sleep and never get good rest unless I swaddle them. I usually stop swaddling by the 4th month of life when they are able to get their arms free. Then they will get used to sleeping that way and they aren't as likely to startle themselves awake at that age. 

I used a playpen/pack and play with the bassinet feature and I've used a bassinet and transfered to the pack and play. I usually don't switch to a crib until they are 6+ months because they are so small. But, if you only had a crib, you could make that work fine. If you don't want to bed share, don't. I didn't really bed share with my babies too often. They will be fine. I like the idea of someone room sharing when they are very young, but if you have a monitor or leave your bedroom doors open if you have a bedroom on the same floor, you can hear them if they need you if you would rather they sleep in their own room. 

[skycheattraffic]

Hereweare, so much of what will work depends on baby. They have different needs and personalities and thrive on different sleeping arrangements. My not at all crunchy SIL ended up bed sharing with her DD because she slept better that way and everyone got a lot more rest. I'm a whole lot crunchier but bed sharing just doesn't work with my DD. She wakes at least twice as often and is a busy sleeper which keeps me up for hours. She's been in her crib in her room since she was a newborn and I sleep with the baby monitor turned up all the way on the nightstand. I slept in her room for the first 3 weeks and then started using the monitor. Right now we are transitioning her out of the crib onto her own low bed (crib mattress on the floor for now but we plan to get her a low ikea double bed after the holidays. This way I nurse her down and get up and leave. I come back and nurse her in bed again as needed. While she was in the crib, I nursed her in a very comfortable rocking chair and put her back in the crib once she was asleep. One good idea for a newborn is a Moses basket to start until you figure out what baby prefers: sleeping with you or alone. They are way cheaper than cribs and it would give you the flexibility to wait to purchase more stuff until you meet baby.

Dayiscoming, you sound so much like me. Being that close to baby, I'm up every five minutes for every tiniest rustle. Separate rooms really helps both of us get much more rest.

[BlueMonday]

Sleeping... I am the heaviest sleeper with lots of repositioning all night and yet I slept with my daughter pillowed on my arm all night for months. Especially as a ftm, you're so attuned to this new creature in your bed that you start awake with every little motion from them. The case for bed sharing is that I never suffered any sleep deprivation at all. Coming off pregnancy and a crazy nyc work schedule, when my first arrived I finally started enjoying real rest. If it works for you, you'll never look back. If you're nervous just buy or borrow a Moses basket until you know babe's personality and your new mom style. My cosleeper was a total laundry basket and I ended up selling my oeuf crib, unopened.

[here we are]

Bumping to remind myself to come back to this, and for new people. So helpful, looking back i feel a little more confident. Just nervous about experimenting safely. Ok, be back soon.
Oh!And about the body pillows, i wanna buy one. I cant find one that is all cotton, i only see ones that are polyester or organic/wool, or one i found then lost was kapok. Brand recommendations anyone? Anyone else cant tolerate synthetics , i am not familiar with kapok&new things often dont work. It must be truly breathable for me, i get all clammy if it blocks my pores. I dont think i wanna go for the upper end one with the wool anyway cause its wool&i think it'll end up being hot? I love wool,but hmmmm. I searched for hours online, i cant find anything else. I need to get more efficient at figuring things out.

[happyhomestead]

Hi there!

This is my first baby (due beginning of July). We have been reading/lurking on mothering for 3plus years so it feels good to be officially here!

Most things have been going well, but I recently quit my more than full time job, and know that I'll need some support and good place to get ideas.

The one thing I wonder now is about spotting. I know it's normal in some cases...and my midwife says it's common after bowel movements (after constipation) and after <3...both of which are true but I'm on day 3 of light blood and I'm ready for it to go away! I'm 17w0days. Anyone else experience this? How long did it least?

Thanks, and I'm happy to meet you all!

[ADuvallMama]

This is our first baby, too! 16weeks6days here and LOVING second trimester!! The first 14 weeks, really, were so tough I'm SO happy to get my appetite - and even some of my energy - back! I've been lucky to have such a patient and supportive husband, I am so blessed. 

I've enjoyed reading a lot of the posts on this thread, it's been nice to see I'm not the only one trying not to stress over things! I'm glad I decided to join! Thank you!  

[InLove2009]

Happy homestead- this is also my first baby and I don't know how long it is supposed to last. My ob recommended a daily stool softener (light, not a laxative), because it is pretty safe and I would not out so much stress on my try to work through constipation... Maybe that would help you as well?

[happyhomestead]

I'm excited to hear we're on a similar journey duvallmama! How exciting! And I may be starting to feel those seconds trimester benefits too. I've had 3 days in a row without throwing up. Woo!

Thanks for the tip inlove. I may inquire about that..it would Be great to not be constipated, but better to have the relief of not bleeding everyone's I have a bm! Lol.

[ADuvallMama]

@HappyHomestead, It is exciting! I had been thinking of joining a due date club ever since we found out back in early November, but none that I found really called out to me... (Other "baby/parenting" websites seemed to just regurgitate mainstream media ideals and I really wanted to try to avoid that...) and then a friend told me about this website (LOVE IT!) and I saw the photo for the July 2013 club (gorgeous!), I just had to join! lol it called out to me! ..though I was almost afraid that I would be joining "too late" at almost 17wks... so I'm happy to have found another mama in the group who's just joined as well, and it's so funny that we're just about at the same point in our journeys! I've been feeling the need to find support from other mothers who are into "natural family living" because my family is not-so-supportive but I don't want that to stop us from raising our family the way we feel is right (my husband is super supportive, I just need a little extra feedback sometimes, from like-minded people!). So happy to be here!!