Junior Kindergarten Adjustment Phase

[tincia]

My 4 yr old started all day, everyday kindergarten this year. She was really excited, but has since started hating it. She has a lot of homework and is way too tired to do it. To alleviate her stress, she hides her communication bag with her homework and comm book. The teacher is going crazy over having this baggy in her backpack everyday. I've explained the situation, and told the teacher I dob't see the big deal. I already told the teacher that we are not doing the homework right now, she is way too tired and adjusting to the long days and routine. I said that stressing her out about the baggy just reinforces her need to get rid of it. Yesterday she was crying not wanting to go to school saying that they make her miss play time to do her homework since she doesn't do it at home. The teacher agreed that we shouldb't push the homeworj because we want her to like school and have time to relax at hone. My husband is awaiting a phone call right now from the ECE in their class, and we have a meeting Mon morning. I'm torn between a few options. We could switch her classes (there are 2 more at their school). We could switch schools (but then she'd be at a different school from her sister). We could continue to problem solve with this teacher, however I don't feel she respects our parenting style or us as the parents. I could also leave her in that class and keep her home Fridays and reenroll her in the library program we did before.
Any insight would be appreciated. I'm really upset, my child is really upset, and she's not getting the start to school that she deserves.

[Bokonon]

Honestly, I think for 4 year olds and junior kindergarten, homework is completely developmentally inappropriate.  Your daughter is learning to dread school before she's really even started it.  My son was in junior kindergarten and never had homework, other than the "assignment" of us reading to him every night.

I would only keep a child in junior kindergarten if they were enjoying it and learning.  Otherwise, school can wait another year.  That's my opinion only, of course.  But full days of school at 4, with nightly homework to boot, is excessive.

[ollyoxenfree]

I feel for your DD, she sounds so sad. I think you have done the right thing already by not making your DD do the homework and telling the teacher to stop pushing the issue. That includes insisting that your DD get her play time even if the homework isn't done. At this age, she is learning as much or more from play rather than from homework. I don't think you'll find a child development specialist that would suggest otherwise. 

What kind of homework is it? Worksheets? 

To prepare for your meeting, I would write out your concerns and list any points you want to make so that if the conversation wanders or you get stressed, you can bring the discussion back on topic. 

I would ask, in a polite, non-challenging way, what the teacher is trying to achieve by assigning homework. S/he probably has some well-intentioned purpose in mind. If it's skills practice like counting or learning the alphabet or working on crayon/pencil skills, you can point out all the things your DD does outside of school to gain these skills aside from any assigned worksheets. I would also prepare with a little research about developmentally appropriate learning and the homework issue for very young children so you have some responses ready. 

If you find that this teacher and this classroom aren't the best fit for your DD, then it's time to check out the other classes. You may find that another teacher is a much better fit. If the homework policy is a school-wide policy and reflects a general philosophy about learning and child development, then it's probably time to consider withdrawing her altogether. 

[transylvania_mom]

I would opt out of homework.