Before we knew the baby was a girl, I casually asked his brother "do you think they'll chop it if it's a boy" and the brother said "I don't really want to know about that" or something along those lines. Anyway, the baby was a girl, and the whole situation was averted.
Several months ago, we were generally chatting about babies and that convo sort of went as follows. I obviously deleted names and changed the words a bit to try to hide privacy.
Me: I know what I'm not on the fence about
Me: the baby boy operation.
Her: ah yes, not my realm of expertise. where do you stand?
Me: against it for babies. If an adult wants it, that's fine.
Her: yeah, its all weird...i would let my husband decide
Me: Please look into it when you have lots of time to decide. here's what I see about it... Based on videos, it seems ultra-painful... there really AREN'T health benefits... 100% cosmetic ... better to let your son make his own decision. it started to be common based on .. when the lies were exposed, they had to change the "reason" TO do it.. However, the rate is currently dropping to 50% if not lower than that now.
Her: that's good. Some folks probably realized it was kind of crazy to begin with. I don't really understand why it was ever done to begin with, but I'll cross that bridge once I get to it.
Me: to be honest... i think circumcising in your state is still the "in" decision. just out of curiosity... when you were dating, was a boyfriend's foreskin gross?
Her: I really didn't notice, but it probably wouldn't have been an issue if I realized a boyfriend had one.
Me: I think you and most females share a common viewpoint there. There are a few stuck-up about it, but I think most are neutral or don't care
so honestly, if you ever have a son... let him grow up complete..as they say
Her: yeah well, send the stuck up girls packing, no use in keeping them around.
Me: yeah..some girls..*mocks stuck-up females who insist on having a circumcised boyfriend*: this is a subject i usually try to hide my opinions on... it can be super controversial and I'm not a controversial person.
besides... you wouldn't cut a girl's parts... why cut a boy's?
Me (actually, it's illegal in the USA, although other countries do it.)
Her: yeah, crazy africans
Me:: yeah, it's actually called female genital mutilation in the USA ... what about male genital mutilation?? huh??
Her: but cutting a girl's parts is pretty debilitating and life threatening
Me: I bet you didn't realize girl-parts and boy-parts start out 100% the same.
Her:: I really don't like the FGM topic. Can we move on?
Me: No problem. I just think it's interesting that you didn't notice any boyfriend status.
(She did realize that boy and girl parts start out the same. I'll give her slack on the bold part.)
Flash-forward to a few weeks ago:
Anyway, they just announced their second child due in the late spring, and I gave the mom a whole bunch of sites like wholenetwork, noharmm, and nocirc. I REALLY wanted to give her MGMBill, but they live in a high-circ state and that site seems a bit more "advanced" for them, if you know what I mean.
So, the mom and I were chatting on IM a few days ago, and here's the basic idea of the convo. Note that the baby is a surprise until the birth, so when she says "I will want to know" that refers to the baby's gender.
Me: I'd check out the info @ nocirc, noharmm.org and TheWholeNetwork
Her: After 9 months, I will want to know! I will have to have that convo with husband if it's a boy, but thanks for the info. It will be an informed decision if I have any say.
Me: I agree... it takes two people to make decisions regarding their kids and I think you know where I stand. but it's something to know now before you get to that 8th month "baby is almost here" craziness. I mean...assuming you don't circ, you can play the "his body his choice" card, which works for parents AND kid
Her: I don't think we'll put the decision off until the 8th or 9th month.
Anyway, I'm feeling REALLY pumped about that. It sounds like just a few minor obstacles of dad being circ and in a high-circ state, but I know they're really open-minded. If they were "leaning" towards circumcision, I have a feeling the convos would have probably gone quite differently, even if she didn't recognize those sites.