Weekly Chat Nov. 13-18 « Back to Group Discussions

[spughy]

Starting the weekly chat since it was AWOL.

Not much new here... got to see the new Bond movie on the weekend (AWESOME!!!! If you like that sort of thing) and have a nice date with DH.  Otherwise just truckin' along!  How's everyone else?

Link back to last week's thread.

[chocolatechip]

Thanks for starting the thread - I just wasn't sure if I was somehow missing the new one, since it had been so long since I'd checked in!

Sounds like you had a good date.  I am looking forward to the Hobbit coming out, which I just checked and it's coming mid-December. Woohoo! That will be a good night out for us.  I also want to make sure we get out to do a few other fun things over the next few months - maybe some theater, etc. - because I know our lives are going to change drastically once the baby comes. Yikes!

I'm coming off of a really busy week last week. Had some friends in town for a few nights with their 10-month-old, which was really fun. And now I know more what it's like to be taking care of a 10-month-old.  And then I participated in an academic workshop over three days. 8:30am-5:30pm each day, with a lot of sitting and brain work involved. It was a great experience, but still kicked my butt. And I have discovered sitting for several hours in a row in hard chairs is not as easy to just deal with as it used to be! By the last night (Saturday) I was just beat, and my husband came and picked me up because he's a sweetheart, and I pretty much started crying as soon as I got in the car, because I was just so tired (and starting to get hungry at that point). Sunday I was basically useless, and then yesterday I had a few hours of doing okay before I started getting headachy and tired again. Today I felt much better, though still not perky. It just amazes me that overdoing it now means I need three days of recovery!!

So that's my life right now. Looking forward to leaving on Sunday for a ten day visit down to California to see family and friends, and trying to figure out how to schedule social things without overdoing THAT.

Hope you are all having good starts to your week!

[veganyogamomma]

Oh my, there is a lot in the previous thread to catch up on! I hope everyone is doing well.

Yay for date nights! DH and I are going out on Friday. I think to a movie though we don't have any idea what we want to see. I'm looking forward to it though. Hes still been working 65+ hours a week so we haven't had a lot of time together lately.

Chocolatechip- I remember being so surprised by how much I had to slow down with my first pregnancy. Enjoy taking it easy! Visiting friends and family will be challenging, perhaps schedule time for an afternoon nap every day!

AFM I have a job interview on Saturday. Please cross your fingers for me, send good vibes, prayers, etc! This could be just what we need to get out of MILs apartment and start getting back on our feet again!

We also finally heard news on DSDs mom. She had her surgery last week, went home but is now back in the hospital. She apparently caught some kind of infection and may be leaking spinal fluid. They are in CA, so not much we can do from here to help with DSD until shes on break from school. Hopefully we can bring her to AZ then (shes off for a month at a time) but we will see. Its hard to have her with us at MILs because she has to sleep on the couch. Plus she has a lot of allergies and MIL is a fabric softeners and all things scented addict, so DSD reacts a lot when shes here. Anyway, we are hoping her mom is well on her way to recovery and we can start to address the greater custody issue sometime soon.

Also, my 17 month old DD is getting molars and not sleeping well at all these days! Oh, I will be overjoyed when we can get back to normal. She had just started STTN too! I'm not getting much done this week because I have to nap every time she naps!

[jodieanneanton]

Thanks, Spughy!  I am in the middle of a move and totally forgot.  Will catch up when I get the chance~! :D

[Linnaea]

chocolatechip: I hear ya about needing extra recovery time if you overdo it and how easy it is to overdo it!  I have to be mindful of that, too, because if I try to do as much as I would in my non-pregnant state, I end up suffering.  What part of CA are you visiting?

veganyogamomma: I hope everything goes well with the custody issue and your step daughter gets to stay with you guys more often.  Maybe by then you guys will have your own place so she doesn't get triggered by dryer sheets and what not?  

Not much going on here other than preparing to move!!  It's not the most enjoyable thing but I'm very happy we're moving.  It'll be a bigger and better environment plus we'll be able to save up money so it's great all-around   

[babytoes]

Yes, thanks Spughy, I too didn't have a second to one either... Been doing baby shower stuff with my MIL all week! Fun, but busy!! Hopefully I'll be able to catch up with you all soon though.

[jodieanneanton]

Feeling stressed.... 

I feel like my family (extended... like Aunts and cousins) might drive me insane.  Snarky remarks, rude comments and general (maybe on purpose from one) trying to tick me off!  Add the moving stress and all that that entails, the fact that I feel like I can't do anything to help (paint or lift heavy things), finishing up outfits for Thanksgiving and cooking a bit for Thanksgiving (which I  reeeeeeeeaaaaaaallllyyy don't want to do now because of the Aunt drama).... and I am left feeling like I am floundering.

Good things to counteract the stress of the aforementioned lame-os.... DH is so sweet and amazing and understanding and patient and works so hard for our family.  Also, I am feeling really good about this pregnancy now... Sortof a second peace about it... (Maybe it is the reaching 'viability' on Saturday??)  I starting to think that maybe, just maybe, I will get to hold this baby (squirmy, slippery and crying) after all.  

Sorry for the downerness of my post... But thanks for reading! :)

[writermama12]

Well, I just need to vent. I spent hours making two pot pies from scratch, making chicken stock--three hours boiling-- and picking apart the chicken alone took like an hour. We ate the small one for dinner last night and the large one was supposed to be for today/tonight. After dinner, I took the baby to play and left my DH to tidy up. He did all of the dishes and left the pot pie in the cold oven all night. We now have no food for today or tonight unless I go buy food and make it again, which I absolutely don't feel like doing now. I am soooooo angry I feel like crying or screaming. I know it is worse because of my hormones. I can't believe he didn't say anything this morning since that was supposed to be his lunch today. Didn't he freaking notice it wasn't there?? Or maybe he just didn't notice because he doesn't really care. I'm so mad. Fuming.

[jodieanneanton]

writermama12- UGH!!!!!!!!!!!  How frustrating.  :(  Cooking from scratch takes so much effort and it is crummy when the benefits are wasted and/or not appreciated.  Maybe DH has something going on in his head and just wasn't thinking.  Men are funny like that, sometimes.   I'd be mad, too, though... What a waste. 

[Chapsie]

ok, I need to vent, too.  

This is the first pregnancy I've had that we don't qualify for medicaid.  My husband's insurance premiums are going up 40% next year!  I looked into electing benefits for only me for next year through my work, and found out that since I'm a VBAC (1st baby c/s, 2nd baby natural hospital VBAC, this is our third baby and hoping for a homebirth) my work's new insurance administrator will not reimburse us for homebirth at all.  Zero dollars.  Craziness.  My husband's work doesn't pay much, but we're hoping for maybe $700-1000 toward the birth.  

Anyway... I've been on the phone all morning with insurance people and human resources people and feel like I'm just spinning my wheels.  It is so frustrating to spend $3000 a year on health insurance to have them just deny all my claims and not pay for the care I want (and deserve).  

::sigh::  

I have to say though, that even though she is super expensive, my midwife is amazing and I love her.  It is worth it.  But pricey!!!!

My first hospital birth (induction turned cesarean) cost over $20,000 and my insurance (PCAP) paid ALL OF IT.  I paid maybe a $20 copay and that was it.  My second hospital birth cost about $7,000 and I paid a $20 copay and that was it.  This one?   Planning a homebirth and it will cost us $4400 out of pocket, plus all supplies, even though we have fancy insurance.  It blows my mind!!!

Ok, rant over.  :)   Thanks ladies! 

[Chapsie]

ok, just talked to another HR person.  She said that homebirth under my work plan does not cover homebirth at all.  Period.  For anyone.  haha.  Oh my goodness!  This whole system is messed up!  

[akind1]

Chapsie: I paid nearly my max OOP for both of my hospital births (1st C/S and 2nd VBAC) and will be doing so again this time. Even if my insurance were to cover homebirth, VBAC is considered too high risk for homebirth midwives to attend legally in my state. I am glad that you get to HBAC! I'm glad your midwife is worth it.

Gearing up for busy, crazy times ahead. DS's 3rd birthday party is this weekend, Christmas pictures too, then Thanksgiving next week, and maybe black friday shopping? I want to go, even if I don't buy anything! I haven't been in years. I must be insane.

I have the stupid glucose test at my next appt -  3 weeks from now - I am so not looking forward to it. I failed the first one with baby #2 and passed the 3 hr. I just don't want to do it, but I don't want to go straight to the 3 hour one either, so ugh. It's mostly the pointless waiting. They should forgo taking your blood pressure at that appt. seriously.

Husbands and food: clueless. DH rarely puts away left overs. But he cleans, and I'm grateful for that.

[spughy]

Wow I can't imagine having to go through health insurance stuff and take it into account when planning a birth. That sucks.  ((hugs))  Also not covering homebirth doesn't make any sense at all; it's a lot less expensive than hospital birth.  Weird.  You would think sheer economics would make insurers happy with it - or is there some increased risk of legal costs? 

I'm not doing the GTT (due to an unfortunate incident involving over-concentrated McDonald's orange drink and food poisoning from undercooked hamburgers in my teen years, the taste of the orange goo is pretty guaranteed to make me barf, rendering the test essentially useless; last time I *barely* held it together and gagged a few times, but my overall gag-threshold is lower this time around so I wouldn't want to even try it) but I am going to get me one of those glucometers and measure my blood glucose (fasting, postprandial, 1-hr and 2-hr) regularly over the next few weeks.  I'm not exactly low-risk for GDM (modestly overweight and over 40) so I definitely want to monitor my blood glucose and a glucometer is a much more accurate way of doing so than the GTT.  It's a pain, sure, but it doesn't involve gagging and barfing (big win!) and I have a lot more confidence in the results.

I'm heading over to Vancouver this afternoon with DD - my sister is coming down for a conference and bringing her youngest who is still nursing a bit.  DD and I are on daytime childcare while my sister is in sessions and we'll go do fun stuff.  It should be fun and give DD a chance to practice being a big sister!  But I won't be online until I get back.  Have a good couple of days everyone!!!

[Chapsie]

Originally Posted by spughy 

Wow I can't imagine having to go through health insurance stuff and take it into account when planning a birth. That sucks.  ((hugs))  Also not covering homebirth doesn't make any sense at all; it's a lot less expensive than hospital birth.  Weird.  You would think sheer economics would make insurers happy with it - or is there some increased risk of legal costs? 

Yeah.. I wish I was Canadian.  :)

My CNM told me that because health insurance boards are run by physicians and hospitals, they consider it almost "theft" every time a woman chooses out of hospital birth.  Like, the $4400 that I'm paying my midwife is coming directly out of the budget of the local maternity hospital.  As it is, she gets paid way less than what she should get paid for the level of service that she provides!

I've always hated health insurance.  It is SO expensive and they are constantly finding hidden clauses and loopholes to get out of paying for stuff.  :(   Dealing with the insurance companies has always been my least favorite part of pregnancy!  

BUT, I have a healthy baby, I'm having a wonderful pregnancy so far, my care from my midwife is stellar, and I feel great.  So much to be thankful for.  :)  

[Linnaea]

Originally Posted by Chapsie 

Yeah.. I wish I was Canadian.  :)

My CNM told me that because health insurance boards are run by physicians and hospitals, they consider it almost "theft" every time a woman chooses out of hospital birth.  Like, the $4400 that I'm paying my midwife is coming directly out of the budget of the local maternity hospital.  As it is, she gets paid way less than what she should get paid for the level of service that she provides!

I've always hated health insurance.  It is SO expensive and they are constantly finding hidden clauses and loopholes to get out of paying for stuff.  :(   Dealing with the insurance companies has always been my least favorite part of pregnancy!  

BUT, I have a healthy baby, I'm having a wonderful pregnancy so far, my care from my midwife is stellar, and I feel great.  So much to be thankful for.  :)  

Theft  Of course they would think of it like that, how else would a huge corporation view having to share resources?  That makes me sick, but I'm also not terribly surprised.  I also loathe dealing with insurance companies.  I've found a really good link, though, for helping you get the most out of your insurance with home births: http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/preApproval.html

[scruffy too]

I LOVE being Canadian, but I wished I lived where Health Care covered Midwives - just PEI and Yukon left to go!!  Figures. 

My midwife and I had an awesome talk about her profession and she actually prefers it not being funded/regulated here.  I mean, she wishes she could order tests and such, and that her clients didn't have to pay everything out of their own pocket  But saying that, her clients are all her "ideal" clients because they have to pay extra for her - they take care of themselves, they listen to her, they are 100% on board with homebirths (as she had no hospital rights, if you choose her, you're choosing to try for a homebirth.)  There's also no one telling her what she can't do - like twins (she delivered her own set of twins at home) or distance from a hospital (I live outside the acceptable range in some provinces) or VBACs or "overdue" pregnancies, etc...  She met a Midwife from BC and they compared notes and she says there's lots of little loop holes, so she's not as nervous if it gets regulated after her discussion, but she just wants to see that it's kept true to its roots.

And her cost is okay with me, for what she's providing - supporting me getting this LO from my body to the outside world safely.  She's $2500 + $200 extra because I live outside of town (covers her extra gas - so she says, it actually doesn't, just makes a dent in it) and all our appointments are at my place.

[GranolaMama09]

Spughy - jealous! I really like the Bond reboot. If the jobs keep working out and the money levels out maybe we can squeeze in a date night to see it before it's out of theaters.

Chocolatechip - we are ridiculously excited for The Hobbit!! My birthday is December 16 and I went and saw LOTR for my birthday every year. DP and I won't have any of the kids (but Oliver) on my birthday so we are going to see it as my birthday present. Sorry to hear you felt so icky but have fun on your trip!!

Veganyogamommy - Hugs from one custody embattled mama to another. :hugs: Good luck on your interview! I hope you get the job and things start turning around for you!

Chapsie - I'm sorry you're having to deal with such nonsense! Is there perhaps a loophole you can use for out of pocket maximums?

[cabbitdancer]

writermama, I feel your pain. Men can be so clueless, sometimes. Thank goodness my husband hasn't been too bad, this pregnancy, though there are some days I wonder...

I'm already diabetic, so I don't have to worry about the GTT. I did have blood drawn for an A1C two weeks ago and found out today that my glucose levels are within normal range!! Wootwoooot! So, I'm managing things really well, and I'm hoping that means my chances of not having to fight for a VBAC are good. *fingers crossed*

My daughter's been sick. I thought it was just a cold--with a really nasty cough, but still a cold. I took her in to convenient care so they could tell me that she sounds worse than she actually is and she should be fine to go back to school, and they said that she's actually showing signs of an ear infection. Considering the last time she had an ear infection, we didn't realize it until she had a perforated ear drum, I'm glad I took her in and it was caught before it got any worse.

Last night, my husband's grandmother passed away. We had been planning to go visit during winter break and now... it appears that we'll be visiting sooner, but not for the reason we'd hoped. :(

After two appointments, today, I'm beat, but pleased. My bp is really good. My glucose is really good. Kiddo is moving lots. Let's do this thing!! \o/

[Melany]

I'm feeling a little out of the loop... or maybe I'm feeling loopy, haven't decided. Both?

I've ready everyone's posts and I'm just beat and making dinner for the kids, so I don't have a lot of time to comment. Spent yesterday on the west side in the office, today at home. Started crying in front of hubby because the isolation/working from home is really getting to me all of the sudden. Or, it has been for a while and the hormones are bringing it to a head. I am alone ALL THE TIME. Even tonight, he has a city meeting through his job, so I'm alone. The kids are supposed to be in bed, but I'm just getting dinner on the table. UGH.

Gotta go.

[rachelalle]

writermama12- My hubby did the same thing with a huge pot of homemade chile about a month ago, so I know how you feel. I think they just assume we've got it all under control. I am sorry that it happened to you after all that hard work :(

I was wondering how to get my ob to approve of a different glucose test than the typical orange junk? Does anyone have any ideas? I get really sick to my stomach when I eat really sugary stuff and soda/fizzy stuff gives me heartburn. I would love ideas...