honestly the first bday was v. different than the other bdays.
for us first bday was about family and friends celebrating together. the emphasis was a big party, gathering and not really on kids. dd loved it. we had more adults than kids. dd just ate up the attention. we held it at a park. she was in fact off crashing the next bday party. we did the whole presents (people WANTED to bring presents), cake stuff but really teh kids didnt really care.
our bday traditions really began when dd was 3. at 2 it didnt matter too much. this time i invited our whole playgroup so we had about 60 adults (and family and friends) and 40 kids of all ages.
our traditions began at 3 sorta and has gotten more important. its more about dd and me. not presents. not dd. she was the person of the day. so she couldnt do anything wrong. i would not yell or punish her that day. also i was her slave for the day. i had to do what she wanted. THAT has what our bdays has been like.
so the first bday - just focus on yourself - how you'd love to show joy and everything else falls into place. make the day special for you and dh. for me the specialness was the rememberance. i got out of photographs (i'd miss so many moments while trying to take pictures). i got out of videos. <shrug> for dd it was just another day with more attention.