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Book/Websites about ADHD and Gentle Disciplin

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 

Hi, 

 

can anybody suggest a good book about ADHD and a gentle discipline approach? Or at least more holistic than this 1-2-3 magic approach? Or websites? 
 

Or do I need to give this up? Can I not parent my ADD kids this way? We try to do consensual living and gentle discipline (not permissive at all) but I get to my wits end multiple times a day.

 

What do you suggest?

post #2 of 6
I don't have any book suggestions but I can tell you that it can be done. Or at least I've managed pretty well so far, I think. DD is almost 10, ADHD diagnosed at 6. However, we have treated with medication, so if you are trying to avoid that I imagine it would be more difficult. I do find that consistency is even more important with her than my non-ADHD DS, as is redirecting and giving feedback immediately -- you can't go back to something an hour later and get any real response. And it takes more patience in that she just doesn't remember things as well as my son and so will forget what she is supposed to do more often -- we use a lot of charts and lists, not as a reward system but as a way to keep the routine going. Also I generally have lower expectations for days when she hasn't gotten enough exercise or her eating is off-routine. Some things just aren't worth the fight. Same goes with behaviors that annoy me but I don't think are worth trying to change. For example, DD sings or talks almost constantly. As a quiet introvert who hates repetitive noise, this drives me nuts but I have decided this is my issue, as long as she isn't disruptive in class (and her teacher's say she isn't).
post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 

Thank you for your reply! 

 

I am trying here, and sometimes it is hard, I'll stay on track though. DS hyperactivity is taking a toll on me at the moment though. I KNOW he cannot help it, but it is sooo difficult to stay calm (baby is sick at the moment, so there is an extra stress factor)

 

so, you are basically using straightforward gentle discipline methods, right? 

 

I am not even sure, that there is a GD book about ADHD. Or the other way round. 

 

Thanks!

post #4 of 6

What's your criteria for gentle discipline? I think most ADHD parenting books won't advocate hitting, other physical violence, or verbal abuse, even if they are fairly mainstream. But an ADHD consensual living book is a bit more rare.

 

Which kind of ADHD does your child have?

 

I just saw heatherdeg recommend the "Positive Discipline" series in another topic. Here is the post.

post #5 of 6
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyllya View Post

What's your criteria for gentle discipline? I think most ADHD parenting books won't advocate hitting, other physical violence, or verbal abuse, even if they are fairly mainstream. But an ADHD consensual living book is a bit more rare.

 

Which kind of ADHD does your child have?

 

I just saw heatherdeg recommend the "Positive Discipline" series in another topic. Here is the post.

 

yeahthat.gif   The Positive Discipline series was really good for us.  It was wonderful for not undermining your child's sense of self and autonomy--not destroying their feelings but still managing to maintain some semblance of structure that respected everyone in the family's needs... kwim?  I'm actually going back to re-read it now.  I read the preschool version when mine was 4yo and we seriously considered RAD or bipolar.  :/  He's now about to turn 9yo and wow...  I just need a refresher.

post #6 of 6

Are you familiar with Love and Logic?  (It's a relatively non-coercive system of behavior management).  I find this useful for working with teens (I always have students with LDs and ADHD/ADD and it seems to work as well with them as anything else).
 

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