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THe BF Thread - Page 8

post #141 of 202
We started the paci at 3 weeks (DD is coming up on 6 weeks now), a bit begrudgingly. I hadn't planned on using one but it quickly became apparent that my high-needs LO has a high suck need and it didn't help my issues with over active letdown! She constantly wanted to suck and my supply was going through the roof, which upset her more bc she just wanted to comfort nurse. My MIL finally convinced me to try a soothie and it has helped immensely. Margot won't always take it, but it is a useful tool to have.
We love our paci! smile.gif
post #142 of 202

naomi does not accept a paci from me, but will take one from hubby if i'm in the shower or cooking and she's freaking out. she will suck on my finger when she's screaming in her carseat and i can't pick her up, but only if she can't see me. i put the sun blocker attachment up over her.

post #143 of 202

Alright, gave in this morning in an attempt to keep her quiet while visiting DH in the hospital and it was completely unsuccessful. If anything, it pissed her off more.


Guess the decision was already made for me :\

post #144 of 202
Originally Posted by Teles View Post

Alright, gave in this morning in an attempt to keep her quiet while visiting DH in the hospital and it was completely unsuccessful. If anything, it pissed her off more.


Guess the decision was already made for me :\

Most babies need to be trained to like them.  They are not naturally inclined to suck on something that tastes like rubber.... It took DH about a week of training for each girl, but DS has not taken to it and DH has not tried very hard.  I am actually hoping he just goes on without it, but it is also so helpful in the car and other times when nursing is just not possible. (in my van, there is no middle seat, so I can't lean over, unless I am completely out of the seat and standing next to the car seat).

post #145 of 202
Originally Posted by kellybeth View Post


 finally figured out how to nurse in the maya wrap. she loves being worn. still trying to figure out how to get it adjusted properly on my left boob. practice, practice. 

Beautiful! I haven't been able to master this yet. It seemed so easy in the instruction booklet.. :)

post #146 of 202
Originally Posted by Teles View Post

Alright, gave in this morning in an attempt to keep her quiet while visiting DH in the hospital and it was completely unsuccessful. If anything, it pissed her off more.

Guess the decision was already made for me :\

If you really want her to take the paci, it's worth it to try again! My baby didn't immediately love it (still doesnt, really) but over a few days of gentle encouragement was able to tolerate it. (Obviously, this doesn't work when she's hungry- just when she wants to comfort suck.)
post #147 of 202
Originally Posted by rachieface View Post

Oh, and my almost 3 year old son still uses the paci for sleep, but we have a big PR campaign going in our house about how on his third birthday we're going to throw out the pacis and give him a BIG BOY present. We'll see how it goes, but I'm guessing he'll be fine.

We are on the same route..I have been telling Nesta daily "when you turn three you have to give all your binkies to Judah because he needs them and you will be a big girl."  

post #148 of 202
Originally Posted by buko View Post

Anyone have any tips for LATCHING into side-lying? We've been working on this, but it's really really hard. All the websites show what side-lying looks like when you're doing it-- duh! But how to latch on first? Without at least 3 hands? I have settled for a cr@ppy latch many times, but it obviously kinda hurts and I don't want her to establish a bad latch habit in that position.

Buko,  I had a really hard time with side lying with my first chid and thought I would never get it.  I am large breasted and had a big let down so everytime it would take LO a few minutes to get properly latchedwe would end up in a puddle and she would get sprayed.  Actually the same thing happens now with my little guy.  But, when my first was about three or four months and more of a pro latcher-on and my supply calmed down a bit we gave it another go and by then she was more aware of what she needed to do to get a good latch and did most of the work herself and I could just offer her the nipple.  So, don't despair if it is tricky now it might get easier later.

post #149 of 202
Thanks, mama.nesta!

Well, BFing was finally going pretty well (outside of sore nipples, which were also slowly improving). That lasted about 5 days. Now I think I have oversupply. I have a call in to that PP Doula/LC, so hopefully she can see me again tomorrow, but I am showing signs since yesterday afternoon. Some coughing/sputtering/pulling off and relatching shallowly. And once when I pulled off, I did see a bit of spraying. I don't know that it's severe, but I eventually got her fed reasonably by putting her back on the same side I used a few hours ago, so I'm going to continue to block feed (maybe a bit extreme-- only switching every 4-6 hours or so-- I will pump/hand express for a few seconds on the other side to help prevent major discomfort).

I am feeling discouraged, because this is the first week I will have to BF in public and other folks' homes (Passover and Easter), and I was already intimidated to do that... and now I may have to work on other positions (not exactly NIP-friendly)? I barely had one down, and have never managed it without at least the whole top of one of my BIG boobs showing. I am not a super-modest person in general, but it's not like I WANT people to see my boobs. Yet, I got some minor cr@p about this from my feminist (!) grandma yesterday and it bummed me out. Granted, she is almost 90, but she's also a feminist, and a nurse! An OB nurse, even. greensad.gif She sort of mini-lectured me on modesty and "consideration for others" (implying she wasn't offended, but others would be). Mind you-- this was in my own home and it never occurred to me that she would be even a little offended, bc she doesn't seem to care about nudity in the appropriate context, she was an RN, etc. And it's not as though I was even topless, per se. *sigh* Actually, *rage!* Not rage at her, but she also implied my uncle, who visited last week, might have been uncomfortable (that could be her spin, though). And it's like, geez, I'm just trying to feed my kid, super-intimidated by the idea of even NIP, and this attitude-- like I don't care who sees my boobs!-- isn't helping boost my fragile confidence. greensad.gif
post #150 of 202

i'm not a super modest person, but was shocked at how uncomfortable NIP made me w/ my first.  i also needed to get the entire giant breast out and it never seemed to stay decent.  i became a pro at the maya wrap, and got comfortable nursing everywhere w/ a sling for a cover, but was always SO GRATEFUL to sit next to the mom w/ her entire breast hanging out so that i seemed less conspicuous...  i still get awkward, but have the big sweater thing down.  and i often leave the room if i think i'll make someone uncomfortable.  that said, i so prefer being around people who understand that this is just what i do- i feed my baby when my baby is hungry and there's nothing else to it.  


i come from a super conservative family, so the reaction to boobs is pretty expected, but to me it's sooooooo weird and unhealthy.  but even my liberal friends have said things to me like "my husband and sons don't need to see that." about nursing!!!  i think that's exactly what husband and sons should see breasts doing!  wild.gif


i have to share that my best NIP experience was in the city of Boston, i sat on a park bench w/ my 2nd child and was nursing her almost totally modestly in a sling.  a middle-eastern woman, in traditional attire, came over w/ her 2 beautiful young boys and they played w/ my son while she sat next to me and (mostly non-verbally) shared in the joy of my new baby and the beauty of breastfeeding.  she was so sweet and encouraging and i thought 'why can't more women be like this?'  her boys came over and raved over how beautiful my little girl was and they were excited that i was nursing her- they thought it was great i was feeding my baby.  even when nursing completely covered, i've gotten weird looks from other people in public.  


you can't make everyone happy, so figuring out your comfort level is important.  i'm not a hooter-hider/udder-cover user, but usually cover w/ a sling or sweater in public or in mixed company.  when indoors and not in mixed company (meaning any male who hasn't had a baby), i don't cover at all.  my babies don't like it, and neither do i!

post #151 of 202
I feel you on the NIP thing- I'm not uncomfortable at all with it, it's just that I really DON'T want to offend anyone (even if they have little reason to be offended at a natural & beautiful process) and I DO have a lot to learn when it comes to nursing discreetly. I love being at home where I can just let it all hang out at will. I'll be thinking of you, Buko. I know how awkward people can be.
post #152 of 202

I never had any problems getting looks if I NIP when I lived in San Diego.  I seem to be getting more looks with DS when I NIP (which is every time we go out to eat.... which has been way too many times in the last 6 weeks).  I am living in a much more conservative town now and I can feel it.  I don't care at all and will continue to do it.  No one has said anything to me, I just see people staring and giving dirty looks.  


Good luck to all of you.

post #153 of 202

I have been pretty surprised with how comfortable I am with NIP. I'm of the opinion that most people would prefer a little boob to a screaming baby, and anyone who says otherwise need to take a serious look at themselves. I live in a city where there are literally places you can call to report a business if they even so much as give you a dirty look for breastfeeding in their establishment and public health will be on them in an instant, shaming the hell out of them. I'm sorry for the mamas who have to deal with judgement from others - it's a pretty backward society we live in these day in a lot of really unfortunate ways.


That said, I believe in being respectful and reasonably modest about it. I generally plan my outfits accordingly by wearing a pretty scarf (somethings I have a ton of and love to wear anyway) that I can strategically drape over her while I'm pulling out/putting away my breast and she's latching on or off, or I wear a tank top that I can pull down or a nursing tank under a shirt that I push up to maximize my coverage. DH calls me "the nursing ninja" because I have it down to such a science that I can feed her without him even noticing sometimes. Buko, you just need practice and it'll get easier. Don't let other people's insecurities shake your confidence

post #154 of 202

Little tip on NIP---poncho, poncho, poncho!  Not sure if that is exactly the right term..a sort of nice fabric poncho.  They are great.  So much better than any apron-type nursing cover.  Buko...so sorry you got attitude in your own home!!  I find that outrageous and granny or not I would be inclined to tell her or any other visitor that if they are uncomfortable they can visit the kitchen, the porch, etc while I am nursing...but I can be a bit of a b**$h when it comes to stuff like that.  So sorry that you and others are feeling stress about NIP.  Just try to remember that the problem is theirs not yours.  I had a friend that actually taped an add from a magazine of women in underwear (prob victoria's secret) onto her nursing cover up to point at the irony of her covering up when we have pictures of boobs everywhere!!  Also, there is a pretty funny ad on tv (for luvs diapers I think)  that has a mom trying to be discreet in the corner of a restaurant then with her second child just busting out at the table...kind of cracks me up.  Don't stress about it though, really the problem is not yours and this is the norm in 95% of the world.  My husbands family in Africa were so excited that I was still nursing my then almost two year old...anyway, I am rambling...

post #155 of 202
Thread Starter 

At this point I'm really comfortable with NIP but the first few times were definitely weird and uncomfortable. I'm lucky that I've never had anyone say anything negative to me about it. But once we were out to dinner with my inlaws, and I nursed DS2 in a booth during dinner, and my FIL overheard a convo at the table next to us (that I wasn't aware of) that he later told me about. It was a teenage couple and the boy said something like "ew, why is she doing that in public" etc and his girlfriend told him he was being weird and that's just how babies eat.  That made me really happy! My best NIP experience was at the Art Institute in Chicago. I was nursing on a bench right in the atrium and there was a lot of foot traffic. An older woman came up to me and thanked me for nursing in public and that she hoped I was setting a good example for all to see. It was really sweet.

post #156 of 202
I love it, Jean! During that first experience for me in the restaurant, there was an older couple that watched with tender eyes and smiled at me as we stood up to leave. I could tell they wanted to say something, but my family was so chaotic they didn't really get a chance.

Had a few more painless encounters - lots of time with extended family and nonchalant boob exposure, and a particularly fun adventure in a crowded independent city cafe; I faced away from the bar, towards my family, and boldly whipped it out. Am I the only one that finds it easier to go through the neck of the shirt, rather than lifting the shirt up? There's a lot more temporary boob exposure, but I feel that I can be faster and (seemingly) more discreet that way.

What does NIP stand for? Nipple In Public?
post #157 of 202
Thread Starter 

Nursing in Public, but yeah, nipple works too!


My general nursing outfit is to wear a tanktop that I can pull down underneath a shirt I can easily lift up. It's how I feel most comfortable until my boobs are a little smaller (around a year PP or so). After that I do over the top or wear button-ups.

post #158 of 202
HA, I'm a bear of little brain these days. I couldn't think of any other n-words that had to do with breastfeeding.

Gotcha. My boobs were barely there to start with, so even at nursing size they're not out of control. That might explain my ease in the situation.
post #159 of 202

It's funny, because I am not uncomfortable with contextual nudity, so to speak.  I model nude for art schools, for goodness' sake!  But that was part of it-- my grandmother was speculating that I "just don't care" because of my modeling and whatnot. 


As if!  That hurt my feelbads. 


Sorry, but I have BIG BIG boobs (34G at the moment, and that's UK sizing, so basically it translates into 2 cup sizes larger than a US 34DDDD).  My boobs are each easily 2-3x the size of my baby's head.  And my areolae are big, too.  shrug.gif  I didn't feel too bad about my ability to eventually figure out NIP with some "discretion," but the comments made me really self-conscious... just the way people make BFing about nudity and sexuality.  Yuck.   

post #160 of 202



if only we could do it like this in front of our politicians, let alone everyone else!  to me there is nothing indecent about having a baby on the breast like this, but i sure would be uncomfortable doing it myself w/ that many people around!


i totally go through the top of the shirt more often than under. i prefer v-necked and lower necked loose clothing that allows that.  but i wear a cardigan or poncho b/c like buko, i'm indecently sized for sure.  my little man's head is catching up slowly, but it's still nowhere near the size of his food supply.  and even those who don't want to stare tend to get a little more of an eyeful than expected!  but i also do what i have to do, and sometimes it's only a hand covering the top of my breast - even that makes me feel a little less exposed.

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