Anyone getting nervous about labor?

[naturegirl]

This is my first baby and the realization that I have to give birth is starting to hit me now! Is it normal to be anxious this early. I mean, I have about 3 1/2 months to go...:

I think part of the problem is that I attended a birth this weekend that was very long, (34 hours) and ended in a c-section. (Numerous reasons why) and this mom was so prepared and strong.

Will I be able to actually do this?

Cheryl

[lena_girl]

I was very nervous about labor and very unsure about if I could do it in my first pg. I was unable to take any childbirth classes due to being on bedrest. What happened was that I had a very fast labor. When I was in transition it got very hard and painful. Since the books said I'd be in labor at least 12-14 hours (I was reading the wrong books) I just *knew* that it would go on for many more hours and be much more painful (I didn't know it was transition) so I went for the epidural. If they had checked me before giving it they would have realized I was already a 9. My son was born shortly thereafter after 3 pushes.

What I know now- labor is not scary, I can handle it, and I could have easily handled the last time. What I know now is that my hope to have a natural labor were defeated by my fears and preconceptions. I assumed that childbirth would be very very painful. Now I know that it doesn't have to be, but if it is it can be dealt with (under normal circumstances).

What I also know now is that a whirlpool tub does diddly-squat if the nurse fills it up with cold water because *obviously* a pregnant woman shouldn't be in warm water. This time I plan to do the shower instead so I control the temp.

I understand how you feel, it's how I felt last time. But worrying won't help. Relax, get educated, and don't assume it will be painful and hard to handle (or you might sych yourself into it). Also have coping methods planned and practised for even the most painful labor. And if you end up having a hard labor or a c-sec, it's okay. C-secs exist because in some cases momma or baby or both would die without it. It can be a very good thing.

[naturegirl]

Thanks lena_girl. I have so much information in my head and I really do think everything will work out fine. Sometimes I think I have too much information, IYKWIM. I am so used to being on the other end, giving encouragement and support, that now that I find myself on this side of things I think I have to do this now! :LOL

I know it will be hard work I just hope I am not too wimpy to handle it.

Thanks again!
Cheryl

[lena_girl]

Don't worry about being wimpy. Worrying doesn't help any, and it can hurt. Everyone is different, but I think for most people your mindset will help or hurt you. My mindset this time is that it won't be so bad, and anyway it doesn't last that long. And when you are done you welcome your little miracle. How amazing is that.

One thing I've read about that has really helped me visulize what will happen and not be scared of it is that all contractions are is muscles working. If you are tense counter muscles will work against what the muscles are trying to do (open your cervix) causing your body to have to work longer and harder. Practice relaxing. If you get anything like leg cramps that can be a great way to practice. When you get one don't let yourself tense up. It takes a little discipline to just relax thru it and let it go away, but it hurts a lot less. Your uterine contractions will probably be the same. Don't think of it as pain, just let it do it's job.

[~*~MamaJava~*~]

I was really freaked out with my first pg around this time (the 5-6 month mark) and I think it was good for me. I thought about labor a lot, learned what I could without actually going through it, and mentally prepared myself. So by the time I was due, I felt ready. I think you will anyway - I think you just get so ready to see that baby. But it's best to understand what happens as much as possible. This time I will make sure I ask a little bit more about what's happening. I didn't recognize transition either and got quite discouraged (I was crying). I did have a long, hard, back labour, but I felt so empowered when it was over. I'm starting to get the heebie jeebies again, but I think I just have to take what I learned from last time and make a plan.
About c-sections: they're not fantastic, but they ARE necessary sometimes. I made sure I mentally prepared myself for that possibility too. I didn't have one, but plenty of people do.
Educate yourself, and you'll feel better!

[BoxOfRainMama]

I was really nervous with baby #1 too.... I think its just the fear of not knowing exactly what to expect. This time around Im getting very nervous to be a mom of 3, .. its the idea of trying to balance 3 kids that really has me freaked out.

[tboroson]

I was nervous first time around, but kept looking at it and thinking, well, if *my* mother and grandmother, who were the worlds biggest wimps, could manage natural births - and both in an era when that was unheard of - then I would be downright embarrassed to wimp out. If it was really that awful, the human race would have died out thousands of years ago

When it came down to it, the only thing that really worried me was that there would be some complication and that I would be transferred from the birth center to the hospital. A *medical* delivery scared me a million times more than a natural one. As it was, no problems, and I had the delivery I hoped for. Afterward, I was back on my feet in no time. My cousin, who gave in and had the whole medical she-bang, still couldn't drive after two weeks because of pain from her episiotomy. One friend (peripheral aquaintence, really) had her epidural patch slip and start leaking spinal fluid - twice - after the birth of her first child. Fever, shakes, weakness... No, ma'am, I didn't wanna have any thing to do with all that crapola. Let 'em come the way Nature intended