5yo Phimosis questions

[MandyWelch]

Hi everyone.  I have 2 intact boys; a 5yo and a 3yo.  The 5yo has always had a very tight foreskin and recently (past 6 months to a year) has complained on occasion that it hurts while urinating.  I have noticed no signs of UTI such as cloudiness, frequency or bleeding.  He does balloon though.  His foreskin is very long and does not retract at all.  It isn't red or swollen at the tip either.  We don't do well-child check-ups or vaccinations, therefore he hasn't seen a doctor in years.  When he saw a doctor as an infant/young toddler he told me that he had phimosis and that it would cause problems.  I'm reluctant to even do steroid creams without a good reason.  I don't want him hurting either.  Advice?  

In contrast, my 3yo can almost fully retract since a fall at age 2, while standing in a chair.  He must have landed just right (or wrong) b/c it bled and caused him discomfort for about 24 hours.  Every now and then he asks me to retract to see if it's bleeding.  I was worried that he was too young, but from reading the boards I see that he is normal :)

Thanks in advance!

Mandy

[incorrigible]

Ds14 is intact, and a bit of an outspoken intactivist. I showed him your post and asked for input. I had to ask because foreskin issues aren't really any bigger deal in our house than any other body part...in that we don't really think about them unless something is wrong enough to get our attention. His foreskin is long and kind of loose, in case it matters.

First, ds did have occasional pain from around 5 -7, when his foreskin first started to become retractable. It took years to fully separate from the shaft, and sometimes would get sore or hurt if urine touched the freshly detached skin. I don't know if that's your son's issue, but the only other problem we had was inflamation when ds was 4 because xh used dishsoap as bubble bath. I'm sure THAT's not your issue. lol

Second, ds wasn't fully retractable until he was around 9 - 10. We had doctors tell us he needed to be circ'd because of it, but they were just biased or poorly educated. He's 14 and a prime example of what non-issues ALL the scare tactics ever were. ;)

Third, ballooning has always been one of ds's favorite past times! lol I've told this story on this board before, but I don't think OP has heard it. When ds was maybe 7, he was at Cub Scout summer camp. The boys slept in tents but had a big group shower room and would shower daily. The parents would wait outside, where we could hear everything going on inside. Though there was a HIGH circ rate in our area, several of the other boys were intact. They would take turns entertaining the group by ballooning their foreskins, declaring themselves "da bomb!", then releasing the water and yelling "BOOM" (we all just hoped it was water. lol). Then, the whole group would just crack up because that was the funniest thing EVER to a group of 7 - 8yr old boys. At 5, your ds may not be as in control of the ballooning process, but I don't think I would be too concerned about it. Ds was about that age, when he excitedly had to show me the "new trick" he learned to do with his forskin...when he learned to control the ballooning. 

[hakunangovi]

Mandy, I do not think that you have anything to worry about.  As "incorrigible"  pointed out, the discomfort is most likely separation trauma, where the urine stings when it comes into contact with the areas where his foreskin has recently separated from his glans.

This might help:  www.cirp.org/library/normal/   or   http://drmomma.blogspot.com/2009/09  .

[MandyWelch]

Thank you guys so much!  I feel so much better after reading that my 5yo's ballooning is a normal part of the process of retraction.  My 2 intact boys are shaped so very differently that it was hard for me to tell if the shape was a problem or could potentially be a problem.  

And OMG, I am not looking forward to ballooning contests between my boys!  The passing gas and burping and peeing in the back yard is all a part of being a mom of boys, but I think I might die if they did that!

Thanks again!

[LuckyMolly]

I agree with the previous posters, it is nothing to worry about. My 6 1/2 year old is the same, and when he tells me it hurts when he pees (which he has done maybe twice in the last 6 months) I tell him it is just that his foreskin is loosening a bit. I am in Europe where no one worries about the foreskin, and it wouldn't cross my mind that there is anything to worry about. I also have an older son who is intact, and an intact DH, never any foreskin related problems.

Tight, long, unretractable foreskins - or short, or retractable, - all completely normal! ;)

[Greg B]

You were given bad information by a clueless doctor.  You cannot make a diagnosis of phimosis at 5 years of age.  Here is reference:

http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/pdf/2008-03retractileforeskinleaflet.pdf

http://www.drmomma.org/2010/01/phony-phimosis-diagnosis.html

Makes sure the doctor does not try and retract the child's foreskin. 

Regards

[PeterBrown]

Your KID does not have phimosis at the age of 5, the skin does not retract until you reach puberty. The growing male figures out how to masterbate, the action stretches the skin to where it is in grown adults. Doctors without a foreskin have no idea how it gets streched they assume it just does. It is definately from masterbation, When a male is young, his skin is still fused to his gland (tip). By a layer of skin equivalent to skin burned by the sun. What you DONT do is Retract it for a baby or a little kid, that is retract it all the way because you will rip that layer causing the sharpest pane you can't even imagine. The penis does this by its self around right before puberty, You can always tell your kid something like, Pull it back son so you have a clean stream. At around the age of 9-17 they will figure out by them selves how to masturbate, that is what stretches it out, along with erections. So during this point, it takes like 2-4 years, (Remember they are young still) going from seeing a centermeter of the p hole, to being able to pull it back flacid, to being able to pull it back over the head while erect but it is so tight at the base that it will make like a tight ring, to what you see in adult porn stars. SO its VERY important for parents who are seeing how cruel and weird circumcisions are, especially because the mutilation happens at a young age so the child will feel UNBARABLE pain, but they wont be able to sue since they cant talk, and there for don't know what they are missing until often when they are like 18. Ripping undeveloped Skin off your lips and now exposing them only to dry air for the whole life, IS NOT good for the skin, its kills the natural feeling, it makes the male invest in lubricants his whole life, not knowing what real sex is suppostu feel like, and if you don't believe it try it. SO KUDOS to the parents that atleast GIVE the male the after puberty male the choice, BECAUSE at that time he knows what he will like more. Think about it this way, men with foreskin are not getting it cut off, because why loose an awesome part of your body, the only fun thing you really have in life. So for those Moms, please take the information from me and just keep it in the back of your mind, because circumcised doctors will always try to cut it off, since they never lived through the fun stretching part of going through puberty. Anyway Thanks for Giving your Kid the right to all of his parts for him to keep or do what HE wants since its connected to him, and not you, and he will have to use it. Also would you cut off your breasts to solve cancer, its just non-sense- Doctors are like mechanics some just suck with they bad opinions. You will always NEED to understand, if the person telling you anything is CUT, then the information and studys your getting are bu*&*it, and depending on who is making a study, the person who funds it usually is trying to prove a biased idea to get a hoard of people to join on board by scaring them. You would deffinetly keep it natural, if you just tried on the Organic Penis on a man, you will instantly know why its wrong, just try it out before, following advice of the same people who invented shock treatments, labotomys for depression, and forced sterileation, NOT SO LONG AGO. Keep in mind, only 15% of the World is actually cut. Really just here, because some weird people wrote laws to get covered by insurance, but when you start digging to see who is making these studies and what is their background, religion, you often find its all Non-Sense. The 15% raised chance of HIV is really caused by having more sex, since you enjoy it so much. I CAN not imagine going through life without my foreskin, HELL that is the best part of the body.