How do you build a personal support system? - Page 2

[pek64]

I found that those I help and support want it to be a one way street of me giving to them. There are a couple of friends who gave to me. One, I have not given much to, but gave to me when I needed it. When it's family that don't give, it hurts a lot.

I try not to worry in advance, and just look around for help when I truly need it.

[Neaera]

I have two primary communities that I exist in, that are both huge sources of personal support. I am thankful for both of them every day.

One is a local mama group, that has an online base on meetup.com. This particular group met one another from being a part of a much larger mama group in our city, but over the years a small core of us have become rather close. This group does meals for mamas whenever someone has a baby or a family crisis, helps one another out with childcare when someone needs it, we do soup swaps, knitting nights, etc. We are there for one another much like family, and have stepped up for one another in really big ways in times of illness, divorce and financial hardship.

The other is a community that I volunteer/help run a nonprofit org with, for the most part they are childless, but share a strong feminist/activist mentality, and there is a very strong bond of sisterhood there. We work really hard together, without pay, and have created something we are incredibly proud of. These are very "hip" women who I rely on to be my daughter's mentors, kind of like the cool aunts. They are personally invested in me and invested in my daughter, and have cried tears of joy with me when they have witnessed my daughter's accomplishments.

So, I guess it is being there for folks and allowing them to be there for you, spending the time even when times are tough, and working on something meaningful with a group of people. I do have sisters who provide a lot of love and support, but unfortunately they are in other cities.