Glad I found this thread I was beginning to feel a little nutty.
We 100% planned this pregnancy talked about it for months about the perfect timing used OPK's to time it and everything.
First month trying found out I was pregnant 10dpo thought I would be soo excited and I was so disappointment with myself because I when I found out I wasn't elated like I expected. All I can think is OMG What were we thinking???
I am not 28 weeks and when people say congratulations, I have to force fake a smile....
I know I will love him to peices and I cant wait to snuggle and breastfeed again but I feel like I have slighted my DD who just turned 3 and will loose out on special mama time and all I can see sometimes is the added complication.
I feel like people look at us like we are ridiculous because we are a large blended family. So this will make baby #6 (DS15 DS12,10 year old twin DD's and DD3) but only DD3 is at home full time and she is the youngest by 7 years so we really wanted her to have a sibiling at home with her close in age. Sometimes our house is a zoo but that what family is all about right?? but I am almost embarrassed to tell people sometimes because of their reactions.
I feel so guilty for the way I feel because 5 years ago we had a full term loss and it was the hardest thing I have ever been through and I feel like I should cherish every second because it might be all get with him but I just cant.....
Sorry for hijacking the thread I have been struggling alot with this, thanks for listening