My insurance won't pay for HB and we don't have even a fraction of what it would cost in our savings, and what extra we do have will have to be used for me to take this summer off (and diapers). So, unfortunately, I'll deliver in the hospital, but the birthing suites are very very nice here, so at least it is a cozy and family friendly environment.
My insurance won't pay for a HB, but because we have a high deductible, and we have to pay into maternity insurance a whole year before using it it is MUCH cheaper to pay my midwife, than to go the insurance route.
This will be my 2nd homebirth. I love my midwife! I just had my 2nd appointment with her today. I love the total hands off, let nature take it's course. I love the fact that she talks nutrition and exercise, cares about mental and physical well being. I get to sit and chat with her a whole hour instead of sitting in the waiting room for a hour, then being seen by the nurse, then waiting another 20min to see the dr for 5min.
depending on where you are, you can probably find a CNM who is covered by insurance - they aren't just for homebirths and birthcenters and, although the time spent will be similar to an OB, the care is definitely better, IMO (at least as a rule of thumb, I'm sure there are OB's out there who are less "clinical" than the norm). I had a CNM for my first birth and delivered in a hospital fully covered; I loved my MW, and if we didn't move, I would totally go back to see her. I would definitely recommend checking around to see if you can find a MW for you care!
. If insurance will pay for one, I'm going to switch since I haven't yet met my OB. Thanks!
I would also check in your tribal area for recommendations..the other thing to consider is that many practices use a rotation schedule at the hospital, meaning that you deliver with whoever is there, so it would be really important that you are in a practice where there is continuity of care (that each of the OBs or MW's hold similar values). Other places will use an on call system so that you can actually deliver with the provider that you have been seeing no matter when you go into labor. That's an important factor for me - I the place I am going is on rotation, so it's really important that I like the philosophy of the practice rather than just having found a particular MW that I like who I may or may not actually get to deliver with. So there's that. And I would definitely look into other practices if you don't love where you are...being comfortable with the people around you is so important during labor!
My insurance wont pay for midwifery care either but last time with my daughter we ended up paying $2000+ for her birth because she was premature and had 2 non-well child stays. ugh. but this time I am hoping my model of care will help me to keep this babe in for longer.
And it doesn't hurt that my midwife is a dear friend so paying that kind of cash is worth it when I know she is worth her weight in gold already.
However I am looking into seeing if the insurance will pay for prenatal/postnatal care with a CPM - to have some of the fee covered. Who knows....
It really stinks insurance wont pay for it.
My insurance wont pay for midwifery care either but last time with my daughter we ended up paying $2000+ for her birth because she was premature and had 2 non-well child stays. ugh. but this time I am hoping my model of care will help me to keep this babe in for longer.
And it doesn't hurt that my midwife is a dear friend so paying that kind of cash is worth it when I know she is worth her weight in gold already.
However I am looking into seeing if the insurance will pay for prenatal/postnatal care with a CPM - to have some of the fee covered. Who knows....
It really stinks insurance wont pay for it.
I agree, but I like your comment earlier about that allowing them more freedom in their practice. Although I have heard that there are women locally who are lying about certification, experience, etc, and that it's becoming a problem :/
Yeah babysmurf, I still feel that way overall. And I am happy to be in the place of being ok affording this. I feel like I spent so little on my wedding (9 yrs ago) that this splurge for something I know I will remember the rest of my life, seem so worth it.
I know a woman who is still paying off her homebirth from 5 yrs ago but tells me she woudl have it no other way, even if she is living paycheck to paycheck. Most midwives I know will work to make it happen if you really want it.
I'm hoping to HB. I think I really only have 2 options for midwives near me. One is mailing me some info and the other is waiting for me to schedule a meeting. I am doing co care with an OB but it's going to be very limited. I had the initial appt and they want to FU in on month but I'm thinking I'm going to stretch it out to 8 or 9 weeks when I'd be about due for the anatomy US. I supposedly had placenta accreta with my first, though I'm not entirely sure that it wasn't just a result of the OB who stepped in on my case (I had a CNM) applying "fundal pressure" that was a lot more like juicing my uterus like a grapefruit. I am a little nervous- not gonna lie. I'm going to have a perinatologist looking for placenta issues along the way and I am hoping my MW options carry pitocin and oxygen in case of emergency.
I've been reading Ina May Gaskin's guide to childbirth and now i"m reading Birth Matters in prep.
I'll join! We just decided to go for it and hire a midwife, and have an HBAC! My work is cut out for me...must be perfect with this pregnancy on food & exercise. I want to give myself and baby the very best chance I can.
Meeting with a new midwife today - still hanging onto hope for the option of a homebirth. I think it's totally worth the cost, but it's really tough to spend the money right now as we're desperately scraping every penny up to put toward a home. Our financial situation has become a little bit shaky - and while I know everything will be okay, I feel like it's not fair to put that added pressure on my husband. He's really okay with a home birth, but also very comfortable with the hospital. I'm not anti-hospital...but would love the experience. Or at least the OPTION to have it. Being that I don't even know where home in June will be, it's tough to picture a home birth, you know? Also, I have tiny hesitations about not being in a hospital...just the whole worst case scenario thing....while I KNOW whole heartedly that home birth is safe, I'm suddenly a little unsure!
Sorry - I'm rambling - this is my way of saying that I'm in my second trimester now and I have NO idea what I'm going to do - and that's unsettling. :s
Meeting with a new midwife today - still hanging onto hope for the option of a homebirth. I think it's totally worth the cost, but it's really tough to spend the money right now as we're desperately scraping every penny up to put toward a home. Our financial situation has become a little bit shaky - and while I know everything will be okay, I feel like it's not fair to put that added pressure on my husband. He's really okay with a home birth, but also very comfortable with the hospital. I'm not anti-hospital...but would love the experience. Or at least the OPTION to have it. Being that I don't even know where home in June will be, it's tough to picture a home birth, you know? Also, I have tiny hesitations about not being in a hospital...just the whole worst case scenario thing....while I KNOW whole heartedly that home birth is safe, I'm suddenly a little unsure!
Sorry - I'm rambling - this is my way of saying that I'm in my second trimester now and I have NO idea what I'm going to do - and that's unsettling. :s
I know how you feel...it would be really hard on me to not know where we would be living while planning a HB...I wold totally want to nest!
I'm also in the same boat in terms of not being sure which road we are going to take. We are STILL trying to communicate with the insurance company to find out if we can get covered. So annoying. In the meantime I am seeing a MW practice that I know will be covered...and it's hard because I kind of like it, and I am getting comfortable there. My DH would be much more comfortable with a Hospital birth, and I know that the money issue is weighing on him. But I know he will "make it work" if it's something I really want to do. My feeling is that if it's totally covered then there was no reason to have to go to the hospital. I thought that he was more comfortable with it, but I brought it up again recently, and he instantly tensed...he says that it's the money thing, but I know that he is a little uncomfortable with the whole thing. Plus he would have NO idea how to navigate questions about it.
I feel really lucky in terms of birth options because I feel like I can have a pretty nonintervention oriented water birth at the hospital we are near...but I also want to take a non intervention approach with the newborn too, and my MW has already said out right that will be very difficult to work with the very conventional pediatricians at the hospital...so that is actually my main motivation for wanting to stay at home. I know it will be a battle with every choice at the hospital.
Ah, geez....I met this midwife today and cried the whole way home, because she was so kind and gave me more care than I've felt in the past 6 months from the practice I visit. My husband is so precious - he said we will absolutely make it work - and now I'm scared. What do I choose? And there are two midwifes that I love...this one (which I just barely met) and another that I've worked with professionally at a birth and would love to have as my midwife, too - she also happens to be a naturopathic midwife, which doesn't really matter, I guess. Today's midwife has attended over 400 births, the naturopathic midwife over a hundred. That's a lot of experience in either case, I guess.
I feel like I HAVE to decide soon. I want to be in the care of a competent, kind and loving midwife NOW. I have an appointment at the practice on Tuesday with a random person I've never met (which is how they do it there - you rotate through midwives), so maybe that'll help sway me?
Plus, I feel like that money I'd put toward the birth is being taken from my family somehow. It's a month of hard, hard work for my husband. It's like paying outright for an ivy league school when you have a full ride scholarship to a decent state college, you know? Or buying a Coach purse when a knockoff will do. I would NEVER in a million years spend more than $20 on a purse....so while I know it's kind of dumb to compare a purse to a home birth, just trying to give you perspective on my spending habits...or lack thereof. I feel SO guilty taking that money out for an experience, when I know I'll be just fine at a hospital. I've had two great hospital births...I'm not sure why I feel I need/want this different this time.
It's almost like I want one of you to tell me what to do. 
Coming from a mama whose kids are getting almost nothing for Christmas and go to school cold because we can't afford pants... I understand your guilt, SweetMama. We have nothing. Hubby is in school full time and my "income" only pays for gas. Our car barely runs and we sacrifice alot but after having 3 hospital births and one at home, there is no question in our minds that a homebirth is worth every penny. We will make it work too. In my experience, my homebirth was worth sacrificing for. I couldn't do it any other way. And in my situation, a homebirth is just safer for me and my baby. I won't go into details on that but we are pretty firmly convicted about it.
SweetMama, I totally know how you feel - I have the same spending habits and the same reservations. But like willsmom said, it's not only about you, it's about your baby. In a lot of ways a home birth is generally a lot less stressful for a baby.
I also want to say, that it sounds like you could really use that support from a HB MW. I know that you have been having a hard time with things (which is totally okay!) and because of the time constraints of a regular practice, the MW's there may not even notice that you are having troubles, and will be unlikely to be able help you through this. But the time you are able to spend with the HB MW's, they should totally be able to help you work through it. AND I would also be inclined to want to have those postpartum home visits from the MW in case you have more issues in terms of PPD.
I'm sure that you could "get by" with a hospital birth, but you have the opportunity to have amazing care for both you and your newborn and it's literally a once in a lifetime chance for your baby. And with two MW choices like that, they should be able to spot any potential problems and talk to you about a transfer if needed. Usually there are two MWs that attend HB, one is there as an assistant...is there any way you could choose one for your main care and see if they can work together at the birth? I don't know how possible it is, but you could always ask.
You guys are wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing your stories and for the encouragement.
I emailed the NP MW and she responded at 9pm on a Friday night! She has been SO, so kind....offered to sit and talk to me again about my concerns. I'm going to give it a shot - just meet with her, lay it all on the line and then see how I feel.
I am so, so blessed to have a husband that is so amazingly supportive. Obviously, I have my own issues surrounding money - but being a stay at home mom, and not contributing financially for years, makes me feel like my contribution is to SAVE everything I can. I am extremely thrifty and do without all of the time, without any issue! Haircuts are maybe once a year, clothes are from thrift shops, no makeup, no expensive dates out. I'm very low maintenece, and happy about it! But this is feeling different. I don't feel entitled, per se - but I feel like I deserve this opportunity.
The care I get from these HB midwives, without even being their client, is amazing. I need that. I really do. My baby deserves it, too. And it's a gift I can give to my husband and two older sons - they will be involved in a much more special way. I KNOW this, but still have my stinking hang ups!
Thank you so much for giving me an outlet to process this. I've been hesitant about sharing much, as message board land has felt so gross and hostile to me in the past - but this DDC seems to host a special group of ladies. 
Don't forget that all good midwives will take payment plans, even past your baby's birth. My midwife gives a discount if you pay in full early, but will take any kind of payment each appointment even if it is just the bare min of what you can afford, as long as you keep paying she's happy.
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