I have an absolutely toxic, negatve, insecure, jealous, debbie downer, bossy, controlling stepmother. Nobody in my dad's family can stand her and I know thats hard for her, but if she wouldnt be such a difficult person to be around people wouldn't dread being around her. She is only tolerated at best. Everytime I see her she starts crying about what a horrible life she's had cause she was a single mom, she had to work, her exhusband left her, ect. She's always looking for sympathy and i don't feed into her pity party and she can't stand it when she doesn't get attention from doing her pity party. My dad ignores it, and I avoid her as much as possible during the year cause no amount of telling her how its difficult to be around her negativity and pity party has ever made a difference, so keeping her at arms length has always been the best solution.
I have to say I like giving her a little of her own medicine. She's controlled how we do holidays for years. Now I'm calling the shots and she hates it. My dad has even called me pleading with me to do holidays her way the way we've always done them cause she's making him miserable and they've been in huge arguments cause I won't do holidays the way they've always been. Too bad she's making him miserable, but its not my problem. Sorry but I'm a grown adult now, with 3 families to see. We'll be seeing my Mom Christmas Eve, Inlaws Chistmas Day, and Dad and Stepmom can stop by Christmas evening. Dad has even said that if Christmas isn't at their house, then Stepmom has been threatening not to come. Really? How lucky can I get!!! Her refusing to come cause Christmas will be at my house and not hers is just icing on the cake. I have a baby girl who I prefer to keep her away from my baby cause of her negativty that i don't want influencing my daughter, so really who cares if she doesn't come. Its not like i'll miss her annual crying about how awful her life has been. And really does she think threatening not come will make me give in and do Christmas her way cause its not going to. For someone who keeps on saying how she's a "grandma" to my daughter and how wonderful that is, its interesting that she'll let a little thing like where Christmas is hosted keep her from coming over to see my daughter who she says she cares about so much, or maybe thats just talk to get relatives to think she cares so much about family. Some people like my stepmother just don't do well unless they are in complete control, and I refuse to let her dictate how we do holidays anymore.