I am at a loss as to how to respectfully and lovingly help my 5yo daughter with bedtime. We have coslept since birth. We would get her to sleep (which was never easy...she fought sleep since day 1 and still does to this day), and then leave her in our bed to sleep until we came to bed. She then asked for her own bed in her own room at about 3. Most nights up until 4, my husband or I would sleep in there with her, or help her to sleep and then bring her into our bedroom when we went to bed. She is 5 now, and for the past year, it has been a real struggle anytime I do not put her to bed. She cries and says that she thinks that I don't love her and then cries for a while when my husband puts her down. It breaks all of our hearts that she feels this, no matter what I say or do. We have tried so many things to help...like I get her completely ready, read the book, sing, etc, and then go out while he takes over. We thought that she would get better with this in time, but to be honest, it feels like it is getting worse.
I get so frustrated, trying hard to not let her see it. She nursed until age 3, and every night was me putting her to sleep. Since then, I am still mostly at about 75%, but my dh and I really feel like he needs to do it on a regular basis, so out of a week, I do about 4, and him 3. I am starting to feel like I should start doing it all again, to allow her to feel more secure in me, but to be honest, I just need some time in the evening once in a while. I am home all day with her, we are starting homeschooling, and my husband's work schedule is crazy sometimes.
Any advice or ideas?