Scorpio - Your post just reminded me, you gave me your partner's email address a loooong time ago because he was looking to chat with other FTMs going through this process, right? I am so sorry, I got really busy (and then my wife got really pregnant) and I totally forgot. If he still wants to chat, feel free to send his email again. You can PM me, too.
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Queer Conceptions: December 2012 - Page 3post #42 of 39612/4/12 at 1:25pm
What are the pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? She + She, with 3 pets who we call He, Crazypants, Whackadoodle, whatever fits.
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? 2 at-home ICIs with frozen sperm from a WTBK donor
What do you and/or your partner do for work? I work in credit union administration, DW is a professor.
What state/province do you live? We are in NYC suburbs currently. New England will always be home for our hearts, and hopefully again for our feet someday.
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? I truly believe that we are going to be awesome parents. We are coming up on our tenth anniversary together, so I feel like we know each other and what we want so well, and the time is right for this next step. There is no one else I would want to be on this journey with and I am so excited that my kids are going to have DW for a mom.
What is the most difficult part? Finding peace in the process is a daily struggle. The temping, the charting, the timing, the insem method, the TWW, the POAS... I actually harbored a significant amount of resentment for a while about it all. For crying out loud, I know straight women who have gotten pregnant unintentionally, standing up, while using birth control. I see now that my resentment was counterproductive, and my new attitude is a work in progress.post #43 of 39612/4/12 at 3:18pm
I've been super busy with the new job, but wanted to stop by to say YAY to Joy, so exciting!
What is your name? Heidi
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? me-she, Jamie-she, two pups Wunbi and Xena-both she's
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? we are using the patience is a virtue method
What do you and/or your partner do for work? We both work in nonprofit administration
What state/province do you live? Utah
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? that is is actually moving forward (mostly)
What is the most difficult part? being financially responsible in our family planning. It would be so easy to just go ahead and do it.
Just a quick update: Still waiting on those KD test results, he's been traveling a ton. Found out I don't get paid maternity until I've been here for two years...huge bummer. So we are really wanting a baby, but also don't know if we want to give up paid maternity. I'll only get 4 weeks paid, plus whatever vacation/sick time I'd have saved up by then, probably another two weeks max. It's not that much money, but we are leaning towards waiting until then. Anyone have thoughts to share? experiences?
Good luck to everyone, I'll try to check in more often.post #44 of 39612/4/12 at 3:31pm
What is your name? Allison
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? J (DW), She. Our 2 cats are a he and a she.
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? We'll be doing frozen WTBK through a sperm bank. In 2ish more years.
What do you and/or your partner do for work? I'm an RN in a NICU, DW works retail.
What state/province do you live? BC
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? Not actively TTC ATM, just saving money.
What is the most difficult part? The extreme disappointment of having spent a whole year TTC with nothing happening, the crushing resentment and jealousy of others who get pregnant so easily. Trying to keep going forward without really knowing how or what to do, spending every day dying inside because the thing you want *so badly* more than anything else in the world just isn't working out. Which is obnoxious because everything else in my life seems to happen nearly effortlessly (as in, I do something, I work at it, it just falls into place, trying to have a baby is the biggest shit show I've ever been through).Eh, sorry 'bout the drama, but I know most of you understand!! :)post #45 of 39612/4/12 at 3:33pm
sphinxy, yea, it was pretty frightful when i found out it was on FB. Needless to say that TWW was nerve wracking!
Joy, those stats look promising! Goood luck nd FX!
RS11, Welcome back, and best of luck to you all this time around. Hope you get to feeling better as well..
m&m, glad for the note about icing the injection site. I was looking at the procedure for giving the trigger and for some reason i looked a bit weary. I'm not antsy with needles or anything, but i got a little anxiety from it. Did it hurt when you did it, and where did you inject, if you don't mind meeh asking.
Soto, if that little one isn't absolutely handsome. it'd be something to get a handsome little one like that :)
What are the pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? Meeh ~she, DP~she, and one Pug, Bella.
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? At home ICI with clomid + trigger and frozen anonymous swimmers
What do you and/or your partner do for work? I'm a Product Support Rep for 15 banks, and DP is in the music industry.
What state/province do you live? Arkansas
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? Doing it at home and hopefully using the trigger will help with timing and the possibility of making a little one is all too exciting in itself!
What is the most difficult part? Trying so hard and getting a BFN and trying to bring DP's spirits up after.
AFM, Temping away and tea drinking and eating better. :)post #46 of 39612/4/12 at 4:26pmThread StarterWhat is your name? Becky
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children? just me (she) and my two cats, Koukouy (f) and Yoshi (m)
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? skipping Dec, but in Jan, upwards and onwards using fresh KD sperm
What do you do for work? I work for a nonprofit org focused on creating sustainable communities
What state/province do you live? Vermont
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? The fact that after 7 years of planning, I'm finally moving ahead with my dearest dream. Also, the idea that I might spend 2013 MAKING A PERSON.
What is the most difficult part? Money, definitely money: fear of what TTC might cost (including fear that I might have fertility problems and not be able to get pregnant because of lack of financial resources); worries about swinging unpaid family leave so that I don't have to go back to work immediately; fear that I'm not financially stable enough to have a child (while recognizing that my financial stability isn't 1 year away, it's probably 10 years away, and I just can't wait that long to TTC)post #47 of 39612/4/12 at 5:50pmThread StarterTwomommyfamily: isn’t it amazing how much the world has changed in such a short time? Gay marriage mysteriously didn’t destroy society, and people seem increasingly “whatever” about it all. It’s that slippery slope the right wing (and my mother) were so worried about; a slippery slope that makes me cry like a baby when I think about it. Hope indeed. It makes me think of one of my favorite quotes, “The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” (MLK) We have a long way to go, and so many issues beyond marriage rights to fight for, but there’s promise for the future.
Esenbee: how sucky that your family isn’t supportive. I actually recently told one of my best friends that I was going to start trying soon (because I’m a horrible cliché, she’s also my ex-gf/first love/college roommate), and she just went silent on the phone. She doesn’t believe in being fake, so if she’s not genuinely excited for you, she doesn’t try to pretend AT ALL. *sigh* She’s married now and has a 5-year old, and lives in Germany (her husband is German), where she had paid parental leave for the first couple of years after her baby was born, and where (according to her), there’s very little support for women working after they have kids. Based on that experience, she sees having a kid as a career-killer and doesn’t understand why I would do it when I’m just starting my career. (Ironically, when we were dating I was the one who wanted kids, she never did.) Luckily, after a long, long time of pinning way too much of my emotional stability on our relationship and then friendship, I’ve learned not to give a good goddamn what she thinks about stuff like this. I love her for who she is, and recognize that she isn’t capable of being part of my emotional support network.
Friederike: Yay for relaxing couple vacations and filling boring car time with baby name conversations! (The latter is pretty much what I do with all boring times—I’ve been name-obsessed since long before I became baby-obsessed.)
Rs11: It must be so hard to be coming up on what should have been such a joyous time. Great to hear you are almost ready to start trying again, though. I’m wishing you all the best!
Mrsandmrs: Woo hoo for perfect bloodwork (and ovaries)! Wishing you lots of luck with injections. I’m curious, how does your DS feel about you TTC?
Samy23: single folks are very, very welcome (speaking as one)! Okay, so the deal with using OPKs as HPTs is as follows: http://www.peeonastick.com/opkhpt.html. Basically, it’s not advised, but it is possible (not as reliable and prone to false negatives and false positives). My plan, when I couldn’t stop myself from testing way too early for a BFP, was to use OPKs, and if they got darker/went positive, then I would confirm with an HPT. And obviously, if I had an actual reason to test, like definitely being past my usual LP without signs of AF, then I would use a precious HPT.
Esenbee/Sphinxy: sorry you are stressing/not sleeping well—I’m definitely crossing all my fingers and toes that your timing will be perfect and there’ll be a record-breaking number of BFPs on the board this month. If threadkeeper’s luck didn’t work for me this time around, then I think we’re all jointly owed a ton of baby dust in reparations! Also, about the egg whites thing, I gotta say, it does sound gross, but, honestly, not as gross as shooting yourself full of semen. Note, I am officially the worst bisexual ever (again), because ick. But, as my KD and I discussed (after I made a face when he handed me an Instead cup full of jizz), nobody really likes other people’s bodily secretions if they aren’t actually in the process of having sex with them.
Scorpioma: love that one of your concerns is figuring out where KD will ejaculate. Even though KD is one of my closest friends, that was still really weird to talk about, much less do. He has a one-bedroom apartment, so he went in his bedroom and did his thing, then came out, and I went into the bedroom and did my bit. So, officially, it all happened in his bed, just in very separate stages.
2justicemamas: wow, what a hard decision about the paid maternity leave. Being able to take some real leave to be home with your little one, without having to worry about finances, seems huge to me. Of course, it all depends on your circumstances, but it’s definitely worth serious consideration!
Darthtunaqueen: as someone who’s just starting this journey, I can’t say I understand how you feel, but, wow, do I empathize! I’m wishing you all the best in your continued journey!
AFM, I'm totally weepy and despondent this evening, in the way I always am the day before my period starts (now that I've finally made the connection to that super-specific point in my cycle, I refer to it as "the black hole of despair"). Between that feeling and the temp drop, I’m not holding out much hope. It’s not over til the fat lady sings, though (and I’m not singing yet).post #48 of 39612/4/12 at 6:40pmpost #49 of 39612/4/12 at 8:08pmWhat is your name? Angie
Names/pronouns? We are both she's. Dp's name is Kelli. our pup Teddy is a he.
Method? Starting January. IUI with clomid, trigger, ultrasound monitoring, and progesterone after IUI. Using anonymous frozen donor sperm from CA cryobank.
Work? Both Kelli and I work in the field of special education.
Exciting part of ttc? The opportunity to be a mom someday. Starting a new chapter of our lives together.
Difficult? The expense and the fear (since I work in the field) of a serious or even moderate disability. I hope to do everything I can to make a healthy baby.
2justicemamamas: I don't know if Aflac is available to you, but I just signed up at work last week. You have to have it a month before conception. Anyways that combined with state disability and paid family leave from the state will make it so I don't lose any income and can take about 3 mons off. It's a timesheet/hr planning nightmare though. There are 4 women pregnant at my work right now and I plan to follow their lead to get the most maternity leave. How much longer until you have 2 years at your current job?
Rs11: I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you much sticky baby dust this time around.
Fille: I'm sorry this month doesn't seem to have worked. But hold out till AF rears her ugly head! It's definitely a learning cycle though and we will be starting the new year off right with some successful baby making!post #50 of 39612/4/12 at 8:34pm
What is your name? Abby
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? DW and I both prefer "she" and "her"
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? At home ICI with frozen WTBK sperm from NW Cryobank
What do you and/or your partner do for work? She's a District Parts and Service Manager for a big name auto company. Basically she travels Tuesday through Friday to the middle of BFE- two states away- every week- so she can visit her dealerships and make sure they are running up to "big name car company" standards. I am a Family Advocate for a local non-profit. More or less I help people develop employment skills, stabilize their housing, access needed resources and gain self-sufficiency.
What state/province do you live? Washington
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? Connecting with you all and watching the changes that are occurring in my body by doing acupuncture, taking herbal supplements and cutting out the caffeine.
What is the most difficult part? Where do I start? Probably the feeling like this process could be endless. If I were straight I'd probably get it on a bunch of times a month and feel pretty damn good about my chances. Not such an option for us, unfortunately. I had a major meltdown when we were seriously discussing using a KD, so that quickly got tossed out the window. Frozen it is for us. We do with what we have. In the end, if it doesn't work then I think my wife would be amenable to adoption. I'd personally like to get started on that now, but she wants us to try everything we can before resorting to adoption or foster parenting. It's also difficult to see others get pregnant and go through their pregnancies and leave the hospital with a sweet little bundle of joy. Two people close to me are preggo right now and I vascilate between being super happy and extremely jealous- sometimes within the span of a few hours. That part really sucks. I'd really love my emotional stability back, thankyouverymuch.post #51 of 39612/5/12 at 2:21amPhew! I got some sorta decent sleep, good enough for a temp at 2:30 and another at 5:00, and both were still way low! What a relief, it does not appear I Od overnight! Swimmers arrive today so we just chug along with the observation of other signs. This might sound silly, but at yoga last night during the meditations, I was talking to my ovary (the one on the right has been swelling for almost 24 hours now). I just kept saying, get stronger, be patient for the sperm to arrive, and give me good signs for the right timing.post #52 of 39612/5/12 at 3:04am
scorpioma thanks for the welcome, yes I have been on this site for ages it seems! I will answer the Q's to say more below. Does your KD live nearby to do several donations?
fille hooray for another singleton TTC! I only know of one other, and it makes me feel not so alone in my situation
What is your name? Samy
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? I have a DD who is 11 years old, and we have a dog.
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? Fresh sperm with a KD I met online.
What do you and/or your partner do for work? I work in admin.
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? To finally be able to TTC after longing for a second child for about 5 years now. My dd had been asking for a brother or sister since she was very young herself and I'm thrilled to hopefully be able to give her that. Also I'm happy to not be waiting any longer because DD is getting older and I don't want their age gap to be too much more than it is right now, 12years is a big enough gap! I really want a second child before my first is a teenager. Plus at her age now she is old enough to be very helpful with a sibling.
What is the most difficult part? Finances, Timing and self doubt. -Financially being a single mom is scary sometimes because that whole responsibility falls on me, and I do worry about that, but most people even couples have money worries. I'm trying to plan for a better financial future, but as that takes time, I refuse to wait years more until I'm in that place before having another child. Secondly the timing is difficult using a sperm donor as I only get to insem once, so have to try to time it perfectly, which this cycle I did on the actual day of a positive OPK. And self doubt because sometimes I lose confidence in my ability to raise a family on my own. But it's what I want, and I have done it for 11 years with my DD already, so that proves I'm capable etc....I just have to remind myself I CAN do it, even when certain people don't approve of single mom's. I have a supportive family which helps the most.
AFM update I am 5DPO today and feel a little pre-AF cramping But trying to remain hopeful and losing patience with waiting to test so I think I will tomorrow at 6DPO. anyone else test that early?post #53 of 39612/5/12 at 5:55am
Joy - Congratulations
Sphinxy - your thawing question. I was instructed to hold it close to the body for about 15min and use it immediately. It seems logical to start the swim team as early as possible. And about your timing freak out - I feel exactly the same way. It is such a scary process. How do I know if I am a late or early ovulater. When to order? Might it be too late or too early? Agghh. I hope, now that your temp stayed low another day you're fine and the goods arrive just in time for you I also wanted to comment on your Brill book quote - to me it seems to make a bit more sense to invest in another ultrasound or two around ovulation to nail the timing instead of the two ICIs 18 hours apart. Unless the extra cash for the additional vials isn't an issue, then of course it seems sensible to cover all bases and insem twice.
Darcy - do you order on dry-ice or liquid nitrogen? Dry ice only keeps for 3-4 days, but a nitrogen tank keep 1-2 weeks. So you should be totally fine in that case. I store mine in a cool and dry basement in the hopes that it keeps longer this way.
esenbee2 - your charting story convinced me to pay extra close attention to temps. I haven't testet acidic levels or anything, but I try to increase alkalines in my diet and use herbs to create a better environment in general (not trying for any particular sex). I bought a bunch of teas and supplements that should boost fertility. If anybody is interested in the list of herbs I was given, I could post it later. I have heard of the egg-white trick before but I don't know anybody who used it.
2justicemamas - about your paid maternity question. How many weeks/months would that be that you get paid, how long till your 2 years with the company and how old are you at the moment (how much can you afford to wait)? If it was just a month or so I personally would still go ahead and use the remaining time to save up some extra money during the pregnancy. If it enables you several months at home with a baby I would probably wait.
afm: my employer (big state university) sent out a mass email to everybody that the start a new flexible emergency child care service. We already have a regular company sponsored day-care/pre-school that only costs 200 a month, but now they start a program where the company provides up to 4 hours/day in-house child care e.g. in case of an illness which prevents the kid from attending day-care or after hours in case of an urgend late night meeting or so. They also pick up a child from day care if the parent is unexpectedly stuck at work or something. I probably wouldn't leave a sick child or a toddler in the care of a stranger, but as an emergency option where no friends or relatives are available it seems useful even just for an hour. They screen the people and they are trained plus it is totally free. So it seems to me like now is the perfect time to have a baby.
They are shipping our tank tomorrow which coincides with our holiday of Saint Nicholas Day, a miracle worker and priest who died 1700 years ago on December 6th. According to the legend Saint Nicholas comes during the night and fills shiny polished children's boots with sweets and little gifts. I don't think I have a big enough boot for a sperm tank, but I sure can hope for the miracle.
Edited by Friederike - 12/5/12 at 7:45ampost #54 of 39612/5/12 at 6:58am
What is your name? <-- see nickname
What are the names/pronouns of your partner and children (if you have any)? DP and I are she
What method are you using to get pregnant this next cycle? First try, frozen at home ICI with trigger, progesterone and timing ultrasound
What do you and/or your partner do for work? DP is a government official involved in Civic Education and I teach Political Science at a large state university
What state/province do you live? Germany
What is the most exciting part about this TTC time for you? Getting to know my body better. I was no fan of the ultrasound wand at all, but now that it shows me mature follicles and serves a real purpose, I love it. It's nifty to watch O happening. And trying to figure out the donor and timing questions. And trying to keep my mouth shut when it is basically all I think about all day.
What is the most difficult part? Getting DP on bord first, which was a 10 year wait . The financial strain of paying for sperm, the frustrating inequality in access to help as compared to straight couples. I suspect the staying patient and positive after several failed tries might be really really hard; I'll see how long it takes for us.post #55 of 39612/5/12 at 7:16amQuote:Originally Posted by Friederike
...And trying to figure out the donor and timing questions. And trying to keep my mouth shut when it is basically all I think about all day.
What is the most difficult part? .... The financial strain of paying for sperm, the frustrating inequality in access to help as compared to straight couples. I suspect the staying patient and positive after several failed tries might be really really hard; I'll see how long it takes for us.
Both of these things really resonate with me, Friederike!
1) Thinking about O/babymaking all day long feels crazy but it is all we can do!
2) Straight couples do NOT UNDERSTAND how good many of them have it, sans the fertility issues many of them face, but still, unfettered access to fresh sperm!
Also, I seriously LOL-ed with the St. Nicholas joke... HA!!
Spinxy: Regarding the thaw timing, we did exactly what Friederike suggested when we did our frozen insems, and that is what our midwife told us as well. WE ARE ALMOST THERE GIRL.
afm: again sorry I am uber-present, I am in finals study mode and stare at this board all day long! the community here is saving my crazy mind!
also, EWCM mucus yesterday for the first time this cycle! We are getting sooooo close.
I asked lisedea over in QP&P to help me out with chart interpretation/insem. timing with fresh sperm, since delayed ovulation happened last month. It's scary that it might happen again and I only get 2 (max 3) insems, and it doesn't feel good to rely entirely on OPKs. DP did buy the ClearBlue Easy also to double check with the smiley face (we've been using the test strips). If anyone wants to try their hand at chart interpretation who also has good experience with fresh sperm, let me know!
I am getting seriously excited for this insemination.
pregnancy dreams every night, holding my stomach during the day just meditating for a conception this week, yoga class yesterday (hehe Sphinxy!!), being grateful for our kind and wonderful KD.
we made a space for him to feel comfortable in our house away from others (we live in a town-home but we made a little living space in the basement for him!)
Everything is ready. Just waiting on that little eggie of mine!
Edited by scorpioma - 12/5/12 at 7:27ampost #56 of 39612/5/12 at 10:01amSotohana: first off thank you for the super cute photo of your nephew! He's adorable! Also I'm sorry to hear about the struggles of not telling your mother about ttc and the general stress of coping with bpd. That can be so difficult and unpredictable. I'm glad your sister can be a supportive family presence though. Also with adoption, DP and i wrestled with this. Right when we were trying to make the choice between adoption and ttc, we met a lesbian couple with 3 perfectly well adjusted kids adopted out of foster care. We ended up starting the fost adopt process with the county and after our first class, we decided that we had to at least try to have our own child first. I do still believe that even if we have our own kids, we will consider adoption down the road.
Friederike: I hope St. Nicholas fills your boot with lots of baby dust!! Also can you post the herbs/teas you are using. I've tried several herbs and currently still take red raspberry. I just wonder what others are trying with herbs, supplements, or teas to maximize fertility.
Scorp and Sphinxy: getting down to the wire for insem! Very exciting! Keep talking to those ovaries!!post #57 of 39612/5/12 at 10:23am
2justicemamas - Does your employer not offer a group rate (or even better, employer paid) short-term disability insurance plan? That is my plan. My employer's plan kicks in pretty early, I think 7 days after birth. It doesn't cover my whole salary, but I can supplement it with sick time, and thankfully after 7+ years my sick time bank is very well stocked. If that's not an option, it might be worth exploring whether you can do something like Aflac independently without an employer sponsored plan.
darthtunaqueen - Thank you for sharing your drama! This is our safe space for that.
Fille - Thinking of you today and sending a big in case AF stopped by...
Samy - I would say hold out for 9DPO to test if you can. 5DPO seems a little early for pre-AF cramping, unless you have a super short luteal phase. Could be implantation?! FX for you!
Friederike - We are not using any medical interventions for the first few cycles. I think if I'm not pregnant by the end of January we would start exploring those options. The swimmers were purchased in bulk (geez, sounds like Costco!) and I'm comfortable with where my remaining stock will be at with 2 per cycle. Honestly, it takes a big weight off my shoulders to know we are covering more ground time-wise. And, thanks to you and scorpio on the thawing advice. I am wondering if the sperm bank sent those other instructions so as to not be liable for anyone touching the vial too early and giving themselves a nasty freezer burn. As if I care about a silly thing like that when I just want the swimmers to do their job!
Scorpio - I have been using the test strips too, no experience with the digital smiley face thing. Have you tried it in other cycles? I wonder if I should have DW pick one up on her way home today...
Afm, the swimmers are here! Yay! My OPK was completely blank white negative at noon! Boo! (How in the world does that happen when I had what looked like a strong fade-in almost positive yesterday?!?!) My CM is slowly starting to come around, but I still wouldn't call it EW, and I can still feel heaviness in my right ovary. Argh! The waiting and guessing is so frustrating. I am petrified of inseminating too late. I am going to do another OPK later this afternoon. I don't know how I am going to sleep tonight if I don't get a positive or some good EWCM. Excited, nervous, hopeful, anxious... repeat.post #58 of 39612/5/12 at 11:31amOkay, here is my herb list. I hope I translated everything correctly. It probably seems obsessive, but I bought most of the stuff in ready-made mixes at the whole-food store.
Horsetail (increase blood flow), lady' mantle (stimulating and cycle regulation), silverweed (fertility), lemon balm (calming, tastes good), common yarrow (uterus toning, anti-toxins), blackberry leaves, ribwort plantain (cycle regulation), ginseng (toning), blackhaw (ovary and uterus blood flow), sage + rosmary (increase estrogen), pasqueflower and vitex (progesterone)
Alkaline tea mix:
Nettle 32%, Peppermint 25%, lemon gras 25%, green oat straw 10%, Mate 5% , horsetail 2%, yarrow 1%post #59 of 39612/5/12 at 12:35pmThread StarterWell, AF arrived just after lunch. It's actually kind of a relief, at this point, since the path of symptoms the past couple days has been really clearly pointing this way, which was just making me anxious and upset. Plus, I always feel better emotionally after my period starts--that day-before despair is killer!
Now I just need to let my KD know that we're on for January. I have so much anxiety around this part of the process, since I'm asking the big-city boy to come hang out with me for a week once a month in the middle of nowhere VT. (Okay, it's the state capital, but it has a population just shy of 8,000, and the term city is entirely based on the system of governance, not size.) Because KD's working on his dissertation, his schedule is much more flexible than mine (he can write anywhere), and I desperately don't want to use up leave trying to get pregnant that I will want for baby leave, but I know it puts a burden on him, and if this process takes months and months, we'll probably have to talk about me going out there at least every few tries, to be more fair about it.
The nice thing about this first "real try" (as I've decided to frame it) is that I'll know a month in advance when my fertile window is going to be (once I O this month), while in future months, I won't know if/when he needs to come until my period starts (so, 2 weeks notice on a plane ticket).
This is how much better I feel on CD1 than the day before. I am having no trouble whatsoever counting my blessings:
Good things about not being pregnant yet:
- Having another couple of months before I try again means I can stick with my semi-elimination/low sugar diet and hopefully continuing losing weight and tighten my control over my blood sugar--I have T2 diabetes and my numbers are good enough for just me, but not low enough for pregnancy, so if I can't get them consistently where they need to be, I'll have to start insulin. (I don't care about the needles and such, but if you're on insulin, there's a lot more push for birth interventions, which I'm hoping to avoid.)
- In that same vein, I really need to get a good moderate exercise routine in place before I get pregnant, since you're not supposed to "start" exercising in pregnancy.
- It would be quite nice to get the donor contract signed before I get pregnant. It's currently stuck somewhere in lawyer limbo, and neither J nor I have heard anything for a month. (Ironically, I emailed my lawyer to check in on this, and she charged $39 against my retainer for responding to my email and emailing J's lawyer for an update--which we still haven't gotten.)
Good things about upcoming cycles:
- I'm excited to be able to start temping with my trusty BBT again this month--most of the reason my O date was so uncertain this month is that I forgot to bring it on my trip and ended up buying a new one on CD10, which meant I only had a few pre-O temps.
- Next time the timing won't be catch as catch can. Unless O is way off normal, we'll have my most likely fertile window more or less covered.
- We'll have a chance for J to get a semen analysis done before January.
I have a crazy busy rest of the week, all about moving full speed ahead into 2013, so I really have no time to fret, which is awesome:
- I joined the local UU church when I moved here (I'm a big ol' agnostic, but they're a-okay with that, and it seemed like one of the best ways to get to know like-minded people--plus, I started volunteering in the nursery, which is a total baby fix!), and trained this summer be an OWL instructor (UU's "comprehensive lifelong sexuality education"). I'll be co-teaching the K-1 OWL through January and February. (K-1 curriculum: "everybody's family is different and that's great," "these are the real names of your body parts,""nobody's allowed to touch you, and here's what to do if someone tries," and "where babies come from."), and tonight is our parent orientation.
- We're finally getting started with a local queer youth night in January (a branch of the existing queer youth program up in the "big city" of Burlington), and I have one final facilitator shadowing at the original group before I can start facilitating down here, so I'll be doing that on Friday night.
All in all, while I'm sad not to be pregnant today, I'm feeling really great about the next few months!
Now, bring on the BFPs, so I can live vicariously!post #60 of 39612/5/12 at 1:58pm
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