Weekly Chat Thread - Dec.10 to Dec.16 - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[chocolatechip]

I am learning so much about hemorrhoids here... Heh. I am glad to know it, though!

akindl and maydaymom - hooray for passing the GTT! My midwives are willing for me not to do it, but I think I will anyway, as I know some friends who had it without obvious symptoms. I am now trying to decide whether to do a screen, followed by the 3 hour test if necessary, or to do a 2 hour test right off the bat, which is diagnostic. I like the idea of for sure only having to go through it all once, but not the idea of having to do fasting draws, which both the 2 and 3 hour ones need. Sigh.

veganyogamama - so sorry to hear how difficult things have been! I hope things turn around for you soon. I can't imagine living with my MIL, though she's a very nice woman. I hope you find the right way to make things a little more bearable until you're able to move out. 

Hi JennJenn - welcome to the fun! 

ClumsySugarPlum - wow, what a dream! My dreams have all been involved, but very very practical. Had a very long dream about buying a fridge the other night, and everything that could go wrong in such an endeavor. And yes, I'm trying to figure out what fridge we should get that will fit in our kitchen. :P

It is very dark today, with thick clouds and occasional showers, and I'm tired from doing zumba last night. At least it's a good tired! But I'm going to go make myself take a walk in the gloom, so I at least move around a bit. Get to go up to the library and get a book that came in for me, which is always a pleasurable trip. :)

[writermama12]

C. chip, you just reminded me to make a book recommendation for the final trimester! Maybe I'll start a thread on it though. 

Veganyoga, What a disappointment! That must be a frustrating situation. I was in a situation like that about five years ago, but I had to live with my MOTHER, not my MIL. She was also very sick, depressed, unhealthy habits of living and such. It was surely worse than living with my MIL, whom I respect and who is generally respectful of my parenting and the way I keep house (my mother is not). Just think though, once this chapter ends, you will be able to breathe easier and look back on that time with gratitude--at least you had a safe place to live with your DD while you needed it and hopefully you'll never have to do that again! That is at least how I feel. Grateful it is over and I've moved on to calmer and better things. 

I have been feeling tired, well actually kind of lazy lately. I just want to sit with my feet up and knit or read. I forced myself to take DS2 on a walk to the park yesterday which I know he loved, but I didn't. I forced myself to dance to some bad country music with him to make him laugh and get some exercise but really I just feel like a bummer of a mother right now. There is housework to be done that I don't feel like doing. Errands. Blah. I just want to nap, and can't. Yesterday, I dozed off reading DS2 a book and then tried to sneak in a nap by putting a Thomas video on for him (which I never do) but he was only interested in pulling my hair and hitting me in the face with books. Sigh. I just woke up and I'm tired already.

[akind1]

DS asked to wear underwear before we went out yesteday . . .accident before we even got in the car. It's good though - because I think he honestly thought anything you wore down there was perfectly fine to pee or poop in (he calls both diapers, but underwear are better for swimming, LOL)  but actually having done it, with pants on, I think a little something clicked for him. I hope so. He can't go around half naked forever.

It will come, and yeah, I'm going to get a 2-in-1 potty seat here in a few weeks, I think it will be best. He doesn't pee very frequently (max is like 4 times a day) which I think is to my benefit.

28 weeks today - I really hope this baby doesn't cook *quite* as long as his siblings! going to 41+6 sucks.

[spughy]

Those 2-in-1 potty seats are great.  I looked for one when we moved to our new place because the bathroom wasn't big enough for the potty and I couldn't find one here... probably because I refuse to shop at Walmart and Home Depot didn't stock them for some reason.  But DD was 4 (just with a teeny bum) and she adjusted to the big toilet ok.  I will definitely get one for #2 though.

I need to yell for a minute.  AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

As if having horrific hemorrhoids wasn't bad enough... I managed to recreate the conditions that led to the horrible, horrible rash on my hands and face that I had a few months ago... the one that led to me not sleeping for a few nights... turns out it was the moisturizer in our swim kit.  I suspected it had something to do with the swimming but I've been a few times in the interim and had no reaction to pool water so I just chalked it up to "random pregnant weirdness" - but this morning, *desperate* for physical activity but still not up to things like walking that irritate my butt, I went for a swim by myself. (Usually I go with DD and DH.)  Well, given that I didn't have to pester one or more small people to stop screwing around and get dressed already afterwards, I had the luxury of actually having a decent shower and putting on lotion and stuff afterwards.  And as I was rubbing the moisturizing lotion into my hands I looked at the wee bottle (it was a hotel freebie that DH picked up on a business trip) I noticed that it was from Aveda.  And I thought to myself "oh crap".  There were no ingredients listed on it, but I've gotten rashes from Aveda creams before because the jerks put brazil nut oil in some of them and I'm allergic to brazil nuts.  Then I kind of forgot about it.  Then tonight just before dinner all of a sudden my hands and face got really itchy and now I'm miserable in 3 places on my body.  I would really, really like someone to whack me over the head and knock me unconscious for a few days.  Just a little coma, that's all I ask...

Seriously.  A coma sounds like SUCH a good idea.  I am just so not comfortable.  Getting whacked on the head wouldn't hurt the baby would it?  (kidding. mostly. And no I can't take antihistamines, I react really badly to them and can't drive due to dizziness for more than 24 hours after one pill.  I will, however, indulge in a gravol tonight so I can sleep, I expect.)

In more positive news, we got our Christmas tree up.  It's not decorated yet, but DD and I will do that tomorrow afternoon.

writermama12 - I am sorry Thomas didn't work for you with the nap.  That is, after all, what TV is for.  Maybe try something your DS is more into?  I found it was easy to tire of Thomas.  Diego was always my go-to guy when I needed a break when DD was littler.   Now it's the Mythbusters.  But whatever works. 

[firespiritmelody]

Originally Posted by spughy Now it's the Mythbusters.  But whatever works. 

Mythbusters is a go- to for us too! Everyone in the family loves it, lots of episodes so not too repetitious, interesting and educational at the same time, you can't go wrong!

[Chapsie]

Wow, Spughy!  I have sympathy itching just from reading your post!  So sorry.  I hope and pray you get comfy again really quick! 

[Chapsie]

something to brighten your day:

[Melany]

Hello!

I spent the day in Seattle for work and I am EXHAUSTED. The drive home has been really rough ever since August. 

Today is my daughter's 7th birthday. She is very excited. I had taken her to the Nutcracker for her birthday, so hopefully she is ok with no big gifts from us tonight. Her party is Saturday.

[spughy]

Oh that's a fun birthday present, Melany!  I'm sure she'll be fine with that.  What a lucky girl.

Chapsie, that's a very cute video.  Your DD?  Thanks, it did brighten my day  

I'm going to see my doctor this morning to see if she can prescribe me something topical that I can use so I can sleep without gravol.  I'm reeeeally not comfortable taking it to sleep more than really occasionally when pregnant.   But if I hadn't taken it last night, there would have been NO sleeping.  Burning face and hands... hard to sleep through.  My roids are a lot better this morning though, which is good, but my face feels almost like it's got a bad sunburn, only itchier.  Like before, my hands are ok as long as they're cold.

Happy Wednesday, everyone.  I believe I'm 26 weeks today - one more week of second trimester for me.  Still no rib pain!  yay!  I don't know that the roids and the rash are an improvement but I'm trying to focus on the positive here.  Oh, and lying around doing nothing has totally done away with the minor pubic bone pain I was having.  It's all about the silver lining...

Edit:  Right, it's Thursday.  Umm... yeah.

[chocolatechip]

Oh, spughy!! I'm glad you figured out the source, but what a horrible way to do it.  I hope this time it goes away more quickly! And that your doctor has a good suggestion for you. You threw that bottle of lotion away, right??

I went to my prenatal yoga class last night, and was the only person who showed up. So, I basically ended up getting a private hour-long class for $12. Not such a bad deal, really!   And I mentioned I had a couple places I was tight, and we ended up doing more stretching/lengthening exercises that strength ones (though of course, strength is involved in many poses anyway), and I swear we worked out tension of all sorts of places I didn't know I was carrying it. I walked out of that class feeling like I'd grown two inches and my shoulders were back where they should be. SOOO good!!! And she showed me an amazing calf stretch to help with the almost-cramps, and if I can just remember exactly what we did, I'm going to do them every day, because wow.

Anyway, it was awesome, and I feel much more on top of things today, and am trying to turn that into some form of productivity. 

[SlimP]

Jeez Spughy, you're having a rough time of it! I found the transition into the third trimester noticeable as everything flared up. Fingers crossed all will calm down for a rest before baba arrives.

VeganYogaMomma, that's a horrible situation. I really need my own space right now so to be stuck in someone else's home would make me really uncomfortable, especially if they're not exactly welcoming. Your DH should gently broach terms of tenancy with her to ease the tension.

Akindl, sounds like your DS is making progress. I found we had to go through a few weeks of evening nudie time to encourage potty use. I know winter isn't ideal for that and there is a bit of cleaning up involved but we've never looked back. Carob buttons and reward stickers were huge motivations for my son, and he didn't need them for long (does still ask grandparents for buttons though!).

WriterMama, I have come to accept that I'm a better mother if I take a break while DS watches a video beside me, instead of getting more frustrated and tired with him. It's not every day and he enjoys his own headspace too.

ChocChip, Zumba! Wow, I can hardly manage a relaxing yoga posture not to mind the exertions of a high-energy workout. I'm v jealous of your obviously fit self

Clumsy, I'm loving my dreamlife at the moment. It's ailment-free escapism at its finest! I do suffer occasional zombies but also get some x-rated entertainment Thankfully bed and I are friends again, though I do have a couple of wakeful hours most nights.

And me....feeling ok despite my midwifes prognosis of an uncomfortable remainder of pregnancy and recovery due to my pelvic weakness. I'm just hoping for damage limitation now and hopefully a physio will help me there. I'm not sure what I can do this side of birth. It might have been my indecision about kegels that has me here in the first place, or maybe DS's forceps delivery. Can't believe I'm so wrecked but I'm not giving in to bed rest. TGI (almost) Friday though, I need the rest.

[spughy]

Quick update: saw my doctor, got some more hardcore topical corticosteroids.  Hopefully that will help.  She didn't seem too concerned about my gravol usage, which is good.  I also had a nice chat with her - she was very happy to see me pregnant (at my last checkup she asked if we were planning more kids and when I said yes she bluntly said "you had better get on that then" LOL) and - how awesome is this - when I said we weren't planning a homebirth this time she asked "Why not???"  Love a doc with that attitude... but she totally got it when I explained the 7 people, tiny townhouse, one bathroom deal.  And she concurred with my "the hospital's ok if you take your own food" assessment and said she'd done that with her last kid and brought in lasagna.  For breakfast.

SlimP, I hope your midwife is wrong about the rest of your pregnancy.  I ordered a DVD from Katy Bowman's site called "Down There for Women" and it's good info and a bunch of gentle pelvic floor strengthening exercises.  It was only $20 and I wanted to evaluate it for future clients anyway.  You might find it useful.  I honestly haven't been doing the exercises ENOUGH - you're supposed to do them 3 times a day and I rarely even make it to 2 - but they do make a lot of sense and they're not strenuous.

Now I am indulging in some goose confit for lunch and some sugar-free cheesecake.  I've had a rough week and I need this.

[SlimP]

Thanks Spughy, I like what Kathy Bowman has to say, getting her DVD is a good idea. I wish I had taken action already, well I thought I had somewhat but it either wasn't sufficient enough or appropriate for me. I'm thinking uplifting thoughts, ha ha

I understand your home birth situation as my home isn't suitable either If I had a private familiar space near enough a hospital, I'd opt for that for sure. As a doula, what do you think are the most important factors in a birthing environment?

[spughy]

Well I'm not a birth doula, but I think generally being able to feel comfortable is the most important!  If you're in a hospital setting, I think that comes down to knowing and being okay with who can come into your birthing room and when.  In my case I have a midwife, and she has the authority to keep everyone else out, so I'm comfortable knowing that unless it's an emergency, nobody I don't know is going to come barging in.  And I'm comfortable with strange people barging in if it IS an emergency!  Having your own food and smells and people around is the most important.  Secondly, you may not be able to do much about temperature, available facilities etc. but it's important to focus on the positives and not dwell on the negatives, especially if a hospital birth isn't your first choice but circumstances demand it.  So a hospital visit *beforehand* so you can check out all the amenities is a good idea.  Is there a tub? A shower?  A stash of free mesh panties? Lots of towels, blankets? Ginger ale or gatorade or something?  Ice machine?  USE IT ALL.  The best way to feel comfortable in a hospital situation is to feel like you're the one getting the good end of the deal - and in the absence of being able to order people around to do your bidding (which you ought to try at least) then turning it into your personal hotel is a good second choice.  So... don't look for ways that the hospital sucks (those will no doubt make themselves known in due course), look for the ways that it might be enjoyable and make the most of those. 

I guess what I'm saying is that maternal attitude towards the birthing environment is the most important factor in the birthing environment.   In other words, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. 

[Melany]

Originally Posted by spughy 

I guess what I'm saying is that maternal attitude towards the birthing environment is the most important factor in the birthing environment.   In other words, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. 

Very good advice. :) 

[cabbitdancer]

I had a rather productive today, too, and something of a happy one.

My daughter has been home, sick, all week, but I managed to get her up and out with no sign of a fever, this morning. \o/ So, that meant I could finish our Christmas shopping for her. Double yay! I had my first (most likely of many) growth survey today, and everything is looking PERFECT. Granted, I'm sure things can go south rather quickly, but it looks like I may get my VBAC after all! Triple yay!

We're going crazy trying to prepare for a drive out to visit my family in California. I'm so tired. Totally worth it, though. I'm really looking forward to seeing family for the holidays. Once this little one comes, I think it'll be a while before we do that much traveling again.

Spughy, your description of hemorrhoids is hilariously *spot on*. I've been getting them, off and on, this pregnancy. Walking, sitting... anything but laying down hurts like mad. Luckily, I don't think I've gotten them quite as bad, or for quite as long as you. Here's hoping you get some relief, soon!

[akind1]

Potty training - he is naked from the waist down all day, and has NO accidents when he is. I need to figure out how to get through to him that he can't pee in underwear. He gets that it makes him all wet, but it's kind of an afterthought. It'll come.

I'm feeling so big this pregnancy - maybe because it's number 3, or because I started at the lowest weight, and so feeling more "baby belly" than I did with my other two . . .I don't know. not a bad thing.

I am so looking forward to having a new nursling; DD stopped nursing a week before she turned 1. Can't believe it's been 2 months!

[maydaymom10]

I've only recently started working as a birth doula, but I couldn't have said it any better that spughy. It's all about your attitude. And go and tour a few facilities to see where you'll feel the most comfortable. I've had clients who have had a few options of hospitals to deliver at and one usually stands out over another. Also, ask around with friends to see which hospitals in your area are more natural birth friendly. Finally, write a birth plan and be vocal (or my your DH your spokesperson). It is your experience - you are paying them. You do have say on who comes into your room to some extent (family members, students, etc.). Make it your experience and not hospital policy!

spughy - I hope your hemmeroids are getting a little better. My tailbone is finally getting to a point where I'm not near tears constantly just sitting & trying to stand. I think the arnica is helping. 

AFM - DS & I must get out of the house today and get some errands done!! He had an off-day yesterday, so our outing was ended quickly and we headed home. I did manage to get a first "biggie" for the new addition. I went ahead and bought a Rock n Play off of CL. My original intention was to use it downstairs, but now I'm thinking I might use it by the bed as well instead of getting an Arms Reach. Had anyone done this? If so, how did you like that setup? Although we will co-sleep, DS has been coming in early mornings to cuddle, and I want to make sure that I have a safe place to put the baby during those times. Also, we have a queen, and although it's plenty big for myself & DH, I know from my experience with DS that I might want to put the baby in a separate sleeping spot for part of the night. We used a PnP with DS (it has since broken), but it was also a bit of a hassel to sit up, pick him up from it, nurse, & them put him back. I don't know that the RnP will be much different, which is why I was also looking at an Arm's Reach. 

Also, I finally had a weird baby dream. At least it wasn't too disturbing.                       

[scruffy too]

I saw the baby move yesterday!  I was soooo excited.  It was after I'd eaten a Ferreo Rosher chocolate and the baby was moving lots, so I decided to look down to see if I could see anything and I could!!  Then I ate lots more Ferreo Roshers... 

[akind1]

Mayday  - while I love the rock n play, I'd hesitate to use it overmuch - the biggest complaint I see from other people is that they think it caused their kid to have a flat head. I think it's good to have a place for baby to sleep where they can vary their position a bit more. If you have room, sidecarring a crib may be just as inexpensive, and a much more long lasting solution, than an arm's reach co sleeper.

We only used  the rock n play for naps, and LOVED it. got rid of it because it was girly, and weren't planning on a 3rd for a couple years. . . but yeah. pregnant, but with a boy, so got another, GN used one.

Scruffy - don't you love watching baby move? This little guy likes to kick at anything set on top of the belly, unless it's a hand, trying to feel the movements. Go figure.