Weekly Chat Thread Dec. 17-Dec. 23 « Back to Group Discussions

[writermama12]

a new one for the week.

[writermama12]

I am so upset today. My Ex-MIL, whom my Ex Husband lives with since recently separating from his third wife, is crazy. I know people say that when they don't understand where another person is coming from, but I truly think something must be wrong with the woman, besides having raised the entitled a**hole that she did. 

My Ex-H hasn't called to talk to my DS1 since summer! Well, Ex-MIL just emailed me that he has tried to call many times and that we have never called back...OMG, that is BS. My phone works perfectly well. He calls frequently about his money issues and not sending support checks on time but not about talking to his son. 

Believe me, if there were even one time where DS didn't return a call, I would be cussed at and commanded to have DS call. This guy is really no good. And so is his mother. Yuck. She never calls either. It's been about a year since she called. 

Yesterday, I had DS call her about his X-mas wish list and she told him that Ex-H has called him many times ad I haven't told DS about it, as if I were lying to him about his Dad not calling. That is what really bothers me. Now I have to have a long convo with DS to make certain he knows I would never do that and that his grandmother is lying to him. How crushing is that? But better the truth than him think I am not trustworthy, right? I don't know. He is going to visit them in CA in one week and I am a wreck. I hate that he has to be around their poison. He always comes home feeling like crap from their manipulation and teasing...Ex-H belittles our life here and reams me in front of DS. Always has. 

[Melany]

Writermama: She sounds like a piece of work, or she's falling for your EX's lies and creating her own. 

I just stopped by my kid's school to drop off supplies for the Christmas party on Wednesday and it caught me off guard that there were 2 policemen in front. 

I pulled something in my stomach rolling over and baby did some major re-positioning yesterday. She was in this V position, with her head on my right side up in my ribs, but now she's vertical, my belly looks HUGE! I think she might be head up, but I actually think she might have her legs up near her head because I'm not feeling any strong kicks, more of a tickle, like her hands, near my navel. Need to convince baby not to remain in this position for the duration. :)

[spughy]

Writermama, that's an unfortunate situation. I feel bad for your DS.

Melany, I hope your baby moves soon!  Yowch, that doesn't sound fun.  Mine is still rolling around every which way and hasn't shown a preference anywhere in particular.  I'm fine with that - distribute the discomfort evenly!

I feel MUCH better now.  My rash is gone (thanks, hardcore topical corticosteroids!) and my roids are very much reduced and the only thing bothering me is that it's so dark out in the mornings I might need to set an alarm for the rest of this week!  Yes, back to nice easy first-world problems.  I'm so grateful that the PITA of setting an alarm was truly the issue niggling at my brain this morning. 

And, only 4 more days until the Solstice.  YAY.  I always want to celebrate the Solstice more than I do.  This year it's still a school/work day - although it's definitely a celebration for DD because it's pajama/toy day at school and if there's one thing she loves, it's spending the entire day in her jammies!   If the weather is even remotely decent I may encourage DH to take the day off work (or at least the afternoon) and come for a nice hike in the woods with me.  I love doing Solstice feasts but we have SO many feasting-type things lined up for this weekend and next week that I just don't even WANT another one in there.  Not that I can cram much in my poor squished tum anyway.  I fear I may be winning some kind of award for being the only pregnant woman on the planet to LOSE weight over the holiday. Oh well, at least I've got some padding and I can afford it.  Unfortunately I know Sunday afternoon is going to be depressing because we're doing buffet brunch with part of my family at a really nice restaurant and I won't even be able to TRY all the deliciousness.  Nothing sucks worse for a foodie than a reduced stomach capacity.  But, at least I get to see my ex-half-SIL (LOL - we have a mixed-up family!!), and my nephews and their wives, and one nephew has even produced a baby - from photos, apparently one of the cutest babies in the world, and I am SO looking forward to being able to give her cuddles!!!

[chocolatechip]

JennJenn - I know how you feel about feeling big already. I'm at 25 weeks, and there is definite rocking involved to get off the couch!

writermama - that sounds like a miserable situation, I'm sorry.  Your ex sounds pretty horrible, and like it's a good thing he's your ex. But I'm sorry he can still manage to make things so unpleasant for you and your son.

Melany - I hope the policemen were just to help people feel safer!

spughy - glad you are feeling so much better, and how fun you have baby cuddles coming up! I agree with your daughter - a day spent in pajamas is a good day indeed. 

I had a horrible night's sleep last night, unfortunately, so I'm not sure how this day is going to go. Something I ate last night didn't agree too well with me, so my stomach felt funny, and on top of that I just couldn't get my body comfortable, *and* there was a big windstorm all night (that seems to be continuing today). So I don't feel like I slept much, and I still don't feel great, and while I can certainly just rest today, I'm not sure how well that will work when my body is all out of whack. And yesterday the baby seemed to decide sitting on my bladder was a great place to be, so I have to pee every 20 minutes. Ugh. I am feeling a bit pitiful. 

On a more positive note, I got to see some good friends yesterday, and we had another childbirth class and practiced all sorts of good laboring positions! 

[babytoes]

I had a huge scare last night... DP and I both had a huge scare, I should say. I had a long weekend, DS3 was sick on Friday and didn't go to school, he was running a temp and just sort of sleepy and groggy. So I was dealing with that, plus DS2 started to act funny on Saturday although it never turned into much, thank God! By the time last night rolled around I was feeling up for some sexy time with DP. Right after we had sex, he noticed some blood on him, I freaked out! I ran into the bathroom and started wiping, sure enough blood all over me! I was so scared, I've never had that happen so I wasn't really sure what was going on. I knew I needed to lay down and relax, but I was almost confused as to what I should be doing and it took me a minute to finally just lay back down in bed. Of course poor DP is worried, but has no clue what to do for me, but went and got me a full bottle of water (good boy!). The next thing I did was call my mom, I knew she would know if I needed to call the MW or if I was okay. Calm down.... was the first thing she told me when I started blubbering and crying that I was bleeding. Did you just have sex? Yes. Are you having any cramping or contractions? No. Are you laying down on your left side? Yes. Do you have plenty of water? Yes. Okay, so as long as there is no contractions, and the I don't continue to bleed, I will be alright.  She told me to keep an eye on it, and that it may take an hour or two, but it should become less and less every time I go pee. Sure enough, by 3AM There was only a very light staining on the TP, and by morning it was totally clean. I hadn't had any contractions and our baby girl seemed as lively as always, bouncing around doing the tango. According to my mom, our cervix and the walls of the vagina are very swollen with extra blood, and being that I am 29 weeks (in the 3rd tri) my cervix is preparing for birth, with all that is going on it is very normal to have some bleeding after sex. Due to breaking blood vessels that normally wouldn't be effected but are so swollen with extra blood the can pop easier. 

Still... Very scary!!! Has anyone else had any bleeding after sex in the third tri?

[Bena]

OMG!  Even though there's a completely logical and clear reason, it is still very scary!! Poor you!!!
 

[veganyogamomma]

Babytoes- Not bleeding but I had contractions the other night after DH and I DTD. Not sure if that's what caused it because Ive been having other issues this pregnancy too. But, I know how scary it is when things aren't necessarily going smoothly! Im glad everything turned out to be okay for you!

I was contracting every 5-7 mins for over an hour, but it really started to freak me out when they started hurting and my belly was changing shape when they came. I drank a ton of coconut water and soaked in the tub, and was about ready to leave for the hospital when they finally started slowing down. I spoke to my midwife a few times and was so horrified when she said the baby would only be about 3 lbs if she came then (I'm 29 weeks).

Now I'm basically on partial bed rest. After my heart issues, I tried to take it easy but found that challenging with how much there is to do every day. Now, with my chest pain issues escalated a bit and after the preterm labor scare, I am taking this much more seriously. I'm not doing anything beyond the absolutely necessary every day because I am not messing around with the possibility of having this baby before full term! My husband has been great about stepping up around the house, and my MIL has even done the dishes a couple times! (First time I'd seen her wash a dish since July!)

[chocolatechip]

babytoes and veganyogamomma, yikes! Glad that the symptoms receded for both of you. vegan, I'm sorry you're now on partial bed rest, but so glad to hear your MIL is maybe realizing you actually do need to be careful, and will perhaps be more helpful from now on out.

[akind1]

Scary stuff, ya'll! I've never had bleeding after sex, but yes on contractions - but usually nothing huge or really painful. Hugs!

Writer - I wish your son wasn't obligated to go. At one point (is there an age?) can he choose to have less contact with his dad? and would he? I just wonder.

I feel huge. I'm carrying this baby differently than my first 2, and he is definitely not settled in a position yet. He flips vertex and breech pretty often, but right now I think is vertex, and he's knocking way down low. He is so much more active than the other 2 were also. I think I'm going to be gaining more than I did with my last pregnancy, but less than my first. I honestly don't care, LOL. I know I can lose it after and since I passed my GD 1 hr test, I have no real reason to worry. I just need to keep my blood pressure down. It always tends to go up in the last few weeks. I am trying really hard to be Zen.

29 weeks today!

[SlimP]

WriterMama, MIL's will always back their sons, no matter much evidence given to the contrary. It sounds like that apple didn't fall far from the tree either!

Scary stuff Babytoes, it hasn't happened to me thankfully but I'm avoiding such activities at the moment as I feel so ''open' and exposed down there at the moment. 

VeganYogaMomma, your ongoing living condition likely contributed to your contractions. I would find them terrifying but you did exactly the right things by rehydrating and relaxing. Way more drama than you'd obviously like, but maybe MIL will realize what a boot she's been to you.

[writermama12]

ON sex, no blood for me ever. I would freak out though for sure. I am so, huh, revvvved up now that I could go with DH anytime, even when I'm dead tired. Like this last time too. Libido is insatiable in the final trimester, which sucks because this darn belly gets in the way. 

I had the strangest baby dream the other night. Totally disturbing. I birthed the baby too early and so fast that the cord snapped off (but he was fine) and since my DH and I didn't want the baby to be so tiny and cold, DH put him back inside HIS vagina and kept the baby in HIS belly until it was time. Then I got to watch while HE labored and birthed the baby. The thing I was concerned with the most in the dream was that cord though as I wondered if everything was okay without one, but baby was healthy! Weird huh? 

[akind1]

DH wishes my sex drive would rev up, LOL, I need more sleep I think. right now my primary overall feeling is exhaustion. Now, once we get going, I'm fine. but the desire to get going - that's lacking.

And yes, belly is starting to get in the way *sigh* I think DH is also trying to stock up a bit on DTD since he is getting snipped in exactly 2 weeks, and probably shouldn't be doing anything for at least a few days directly after.

And my belly is starting to itch.

[scarletsmiles]

Originally Posted by writermama12 

ON sex, no blood for me ever. I would freak out though for sure. I am so, huh, revvvved up now that I could go with DH anytime, even when I'm dead tired. Like this last time too. Libido is insatiable in the final trimester, which sucks because this darn belly gets in the way. 

I feel like pregnancy has helped me to feel more empowered in my own body.  I'm 28 weeks and I do feel big, but since I feel so sexual all the time, I feel big and sexy. Could not have predicted I'd feel this way about being pregnant. I think DH won't mind more babies either if this is how it is ;)

[scruffy too]

If I had written down some predictions for this pregnancy, I would have assumed my sex drive would increase.  This had not been the case.  At all. 

Another cold snap came our way.  -40*C / -40*F is cold.  It hurts to breathe.  But little bits of it are awesome. 

Can't write any more, DP needs the computer to look up a chocolate bacon cake.

But, yeah, Solstice on Friday!!  Always a HUGE party around my neck of the woods!!!!

[spughy]

Originally Posted by scruffy too 

If I had written down some predictions for this pregnancy, I would have assumed my sex drive would increase.  This had not been the case.

...

Can't write any more, DP needs the computer to look up a chocolate bacon cake.

WTF is wrong with you??? LOL   (Kidding.  Totally kidding. I just found those two sentences put together are just not what one would expect to hear...)

I have the reverse problem - lotsa libido and a DH who doesn't share it.  

[Chapsie]

Oh man... Feeling so sore after a busy night at work. Im a nurse and run around like crazy all day and work under radiant warmer beds with newborns so I get really warm and dehydrated. Attended 3 births in only 45 minutes at the very end of my shift and now my feet are killing me. I can definitely tell how the relaxin hormone is loosening up my hips-- anyone else starting to "waddle" already?

Ready for bed!!!

[akind1]

Waddling - check! my hips are so sore, and the area right under my butt cheeks - why - I don't know. This pregnancy is so different in that I am so more uncomfortable than I remember being with the others.

Libido . . I'm working on it. exhaustion overrides. In my other pregnancies, I was the one with a high drive, and DH not so much. It's flipped this time! I'm only hoping that all these prostaglandins work to make me go into labor sooner than later. I'd love only carry this one to the 40 week mark or so, instead of almost 42. Not going to hold my breath on that though.

Chapsie - will you work until delivery? I'd think you might need to be off a few weeks before you're due - or at least cut back hours - if you could. I have a sit down job, so no excuse.

I think I need to get up and move more; it might help my discomfort. But I have no motivation! LOL And you can tell by looking at the house.

I'm curious about this recipe for chocolate bacon cake . . . .

[babytoes]

Hi all...

Sorry I went MIA after my post about DTD and our scare. Being the week before Christmas, I am so busy I'm about to pop! I still have four pairs of lounge pants to make for DS2 and 3 (two pairs each), wrap the rest of the gifts, and start making the cookies, and other sweets for all of our siblings, there's 10 total (that's what we give as gifts to them, a tin full of sweets!). And to add into all of that, tomorrow I can't do any of it because I will be on the road all day ... Ah well! Tiss' the season!!

But before digging into all of that stuff today, I wanted to jump on here and update you all. I saw my midwives yesterday, it was a regular check up not one I made because of Sunday night. I told them about what happened, and they agreed with what my mom had told me to do (lie down, drink lots of fluids, make sure I wasn't having more bleeding and no contractions...). And they also said that it was common due to having 40% more blood in our bodies and blood vessels being pushed to their limit. We collectivly decided to do an internal exam (BTW, this is my first exam with this midwife! I love that they are non evasive.), just to be sure I wasn't doing anything funky, like dialating! She said she could feel my cervix and it was closed tight, and baby was still nice and high. After the exam they both agreed that we could DTD, that there was nothing to indicate any problems. YEAH!! Although that doesn't make me any less tired, but I still really enjoy our sexy time once we get going. Akind1 said that she was like this. I am almost never in the mood mostly because I am just tired, but once we get going it's always enjoyable and I 'm glad we did it. So I'm happy we've been given the go ahead to continue.

I hope everyone finds their libido! 

[Chapsie]

Akind, no, I'll be working until about 39 weeks or so. I usually go over by a week, so it will be nice to have a little time off hopefully before baby comes.

I worked full time at the hospital until 39 weeks with my son and part time to 39 weeks with my daughter. I remember thinking "how many more times will I waddle up and down this hallway?" At the end, after the baby has dropped, it is so bizarre to feel the baby's head in your pelvis while walking so much! I usually feel like the baby is about to fall out, but then it takes another 2 weeks before the birth! Haha. I love my job, but my feet, back, and hips are starting to not like it so much!

Thank God for Burt's bees mama bee leg and foot lotion-- so soothing and tingly after a hard day!

In other news, I'm starting to feel huge. A girl at work is about 26 weeks (I'm 27 weeks) and she is so cute and tiny! I carry like a basketball-- all sticky outy. I think "how much bigger can I get?" But then I remember my last pregnancy (with big baby and polyhydramnios... I'll try to post a pic later) and know I have a ways to go yet!