Experience with Post-Partum Doula? « Back to Group Discussions

[eminvc]

Has anyone here had a post-partum doula before? Here are my reasons for leaning toward hiring one:

-most family is about 5 hours away. While parents plan to come help for a week or so each, it is hard to nail down a schedule with my due date so up in the air (twins!)

-twins!

-first time mom!

-I have some concerns about my mother helping out...love my mom, but she did not breastfeed and although she supports it in theory, she has made many comments about don't be afraid to use formula, breastfeeding is hard, harder w/ twins, etc. Though I don't think she'll stand in my way per se, her solution at any hint of a problem will be to switch to formula. I think I could use an advocate/helper in this arena.

[lovebeingamomma]

I would most definitely hire one.  Personally, I didn't.  I could handle one at a time.  But in your situation I totally would.  Twins.  Twins!  The least they can do is hold one while you take care of the other.  And if you do overnights, I'm sure you will be much appreciative of them helping you get them back to sleep (or maybe her holding them while you get sleep).  While you breastfeed she could make you sandwich.  There are just so many little things they do that make a difference.  Most doulas are tender, compassionate, sensitive...all the things that mother's or MIL's may not have (don't you hate it when they come to "help" and you end up being their hostess?  Doulas are not this way, they are there for you and you alone)  They are trained to understand your needs, and they are great with babies.  I'm a birth doula not PP, but I think the care they give can be incredibly helpful for first time moms...and need I say it again, twins!  :)  Interview a few and I'm sure you'll find a good match.  It takes a village to raise a child. 

[rachieface]

I'm a birth doula and postpartum doula, and I say if you can afford it, DO IT. I would in a heartbeat, even with just one baby if I had the money. I'm a bit biased, but doulas are so awesome: it's like a mother-type who knows what to do with babies, supports breastfeeding, and doesn't bring any emotional baggage inherent in close family relationships. I just don't think there's any way you would regret it.

[loveandgarbage]

I agree... in your situation it would be a no-brainer!

[Adaline'sMama]

Originally Posted by eminvc 

-I have some concerns about my mother helping out...love my mom, but she did not breastfeed and although she supports it in theory, she has made many comments about don't be afraid to use formula, breastfeeding is hard, harder w/ twins, etc. Though I don't think she'll stand in my way per se, her solution at any hint of a problem will be to switch to formula. I think I could use an advocate/helper in this arena.

I say do it! Aside from the twins and the family far away, the bolded above is a great reason to have a pp doula around. I'm not going to sugar coat this for you, lots and lots of women find breastfeeding to be HARD. If you are dedicated to it, the last thing you want is someone who isnt supportive (suggesting formula at the slightest problem is not supportive). And with two babies and you having never nursed before, it is likely that it's not going to be easy peasy blissful nursing with no problems in the world. Having a pp doula around will help so much with that. Also, have you gone to any LLL meetings during this pregnancy? It's a good place to go for information beforehand and help afterwards. 

[Michelle Renee]

We are increasing our Nanny' hours from 6-8 a week to close to 20.  We started this 2 weeks ago.  She handles bathing my older two, basic household chores, and laundry.  I have been really uncomfortable and my husband isn't super hands on.  She also takes my older two to school in the morning.   This will let me sleep a bit more and be with baby.

We have family support for when the baby is here but sometimes honestly I prefer the objectiveness of someone who is not family.

Good luck! Do it!