I don't want to tandem nurse..what should I do?

[MissMuffet]

I'm nearly seven months pregnant and my 21 mos old still nurses once for nap time and once at bed time. I cherish our nursing relationship but do not want to tandem nurse (and am worried his nursing sessions will increase again once the milk returns). I have tried weaning him completely but it's just not working. I'm hoping he'll give it up once the new one is born .. but knowing him, it's highly unlikely. Thoughts? Advice?

x posted in march ddc

[skycheattraffic]

I've heard of moms having success weaning by being away from LO for a couple of days (little weekend trip for example). Does your DS fall asleep without nursing for DP? My thought is to have DP do bedtimes for a while (you may have to leave the house - do groceries, see a movie, whatever) so that going to sleep without nursing is established. That way you'd be down to one session (the nap) and I think you could probably get that one stopped by taking a weekend trip away. I hope you find something that works for you. I'm on the other side of the fence: due in July (DD is 21 months now too) and I hope to tandem nurse. But of course until baby arrives, I will have no idea how tandeming might go and I may decide it's not for me. My big reason for sticking with it is that I do 100% of the nighttime parenting (DH has health issues regarding lack of sleep) so I just go with the path of least resistance. Good luck and I hope you will post updates

[phathui5]

I've tandem nursed three sets of children. The only down side for me was that (and this was mostly with our two oldest) the toddler was still used to me putting him to bed, so it was tough having dh hold the crying baby while I nursed ds#1 to sleep. Aside from that, tandem nursing worked well for us.

[1babysmom]

If it helps at all, I found that my children (who did not wean during pregnancy) didn't increase nursing after the baby came.  I had also nightweaned them in early/mid-pregnancy...I had no desire to nurse more than 1 at night.  But tandeming was wonderful for easing the transition for everyone.

[MissMuffet]

Well now we are down to just one nursing session- at nap time. For the the past week I've offered him a snack right before bed (usually an apple or an orange) and told him that after he finishes, he needs to sleep, no milkies. He eats the snack, plops down, and falls asleep. It's pretty funny. Strangely, it's the afternoon nursing that he's refusing to let go of. I'm fine with that and wouldn't mind continuing for as long as he wants with just one nursing a day, but much as I would love to, I can't do full blown tandeming with my other young'uns to take care of!

Thanks for all your input, I appreciate it.

[skycheattraffic]

That sounds like a great compromise! He will still get immune and comfort benefits and you will have him on a sustainable routine. As long as he gets to choose when to let go of that final session, it will still be CLW (if that's right for your family). He's a lucky little guy :-)

[lovemylab]

I just started trying this: I placed band aids on my nipples and said I had boo boos. At nap time when I told her she was mad but last night I reminded her and she just wanted me to snuggle her to sleep! We will see how it goes today. I feel bad lying (she is 21 months) I am 18 weeks along and very sore... I was really concerned about being away at the hospital for a few day so this may help.

[proudMoMmy2634]

I guess I need to wean already.. DD is 22months..

Anyway, my sister had been in your situation..she had even drawn animals in here breast so my nephew would stop BFing, but he still won't stop but when my youngest nephew arrived he just automatically stop on his own. He just knew that his brother own the breast now..lol, and he was too excited to play with him then..