When to tell older sibs? « Back to Group Discussions

[Jillgayle]

So i am now 7 wks 3days with my 2nd. My DS is 2 years 4 months.  When do people tell their children about the new baby?

I am really sick, and in bed a lot of the time.  My poor DS keeps asking "When Momma feel better?"  My DH wants to tell him but I worry that if something happens, then I will have to explain that too.   

Any thoughts?

[LeighPF]

We told our almost four year old at seven weeks and he mostly gets it. He does think Iggy is a bad baby making my tummy hurt, but I explained that it is not his fault and Monkey did that too, mostly.

With a younger one, who is old enough to understand (Bee is 20 months and does not get it yet), I would say I was sick but would feel better in a few weeks. Once I was done being sick I would talk about the baby. Keep them separate events.

[CrunchyMama19]

I didn't tell my older DD (5) until we were ready to tell everybody since I knew as soon as she found out she would take it upon herself to spread the news.

[LeighPF]

When we told monkey, we told family that day and my close friends/neighbours who kids ours are close to.

[Jillgayle]

Thanks, Leigh for bringing up the point about keeping the two issues (sickness and baby) separate for the LO's.

CrunchyMama- Already have concerns about DS running to my mom (who cares for him 1x/week) about the weekend we had with me in bed the whole time. She's a worry-wort and I have been trying to hold off telling her.  I would love to wait until 12 weeks so I don't have to hear about all her anxieties on top of mine, but there may be no getting around it.

[Banana731]

We also don't tell them until we tell the world

[GISDiva]

We won't tell our four-year-old until we're ready for everyone to know, he stinks at keeping secrets.

[askew]

Last! 6 year old would tell everyone himself. We won't tell anyone until after the first trimester. (Except my BFF who I told before DH)

[Stormikris]

My DH could not wait to tell the world. So our DS who is 3.75 found out right away. And he was the one to tell parents that he is going to be a big brother.

[LeighPF]

Monkey and I checked out some of the pregnancy week by week sites since he as been asking to see what Iggy looks like. Watched all the development videos in Baby Center then he asked to see pictures of his own birth (very upset i had none where you could see him inside my tummy). Lots of questions about the umbillical cord.

[Jillgayle]

I think i would feel most comfortable telling DS after first trimester, but he did tell my mother today that he wants his "brothers and sisters" to come for visit and play with his toys.  I swear i haven't said anything!

[GISDiva]

Originally Posted by Jillgayle 

I think i would feel most comfortable telling DS after first trimester, but he did tell my mother today that he wants his "brothers and sisters" to come for visit and play with his toys.  I swear i haven't said anything!

 My son has been talking about the baby in my tummy for a good year now.  I'm almost wondering if telling him will be a big old non-event because he already "knew".