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Queer Conceptions: January 2013 - Page 21

post #401 of 585

pokeyAC- that is some excellent news! I am going to try that...

 

SanDiego, so glad you are taking some time to rejuvenate. Hope the HSG goes well, also.

 

sotohana, you sound great. a plan is the BEST. 

 

lea2012, have you tested again?! the one larger breast symptom certainly must mean something!

escher & twomommyfamily, congrats on your inseminations, hope they go smoothly!! energy.gif

 

 

afm, wow, I am tired. also feel like there are rocks rolling around in my uterus, I know, weird way to describe it!

also lots of pangs. enough that I was very uncomfortable and skipped yoga.
post #402 of 585

ETA - Scorpioma - Sorry you are uncomfortable but hopefully that is a good sign!!!

 

sphinxy - That's so cool you were able to figure that out! 

 

friederike - How long do you take the progesterone for? My RE just prescribed it for me and told me to start taking it tomorrow. She didn't say when to stop. 

 

escher - 34 days would be nice but I usually don't get past 31/32 before AF arrives. Congrats on the positive OPK!! How excited you must be. Good luck tomorrrow!!

 

fmorris28 - Thanks for sharing your experience on clomid. As for the fresh sperm, I got an email back last night regarding a prospect here in San Diego. After further investigation I discovered that he was the donor for dear friends of mine who just gave birth. I am really disappointed because he would have been perfect. I will keep trying! 

 

San Diego - RE confirmed today that it was low. I think 8.74. 

 

AFM - Wow what a crazy day. So I had my appointment with RE to discuss moving to clomid (my idea because we are running out of money/time/low amh) and I found out so much. Apparently last July when I got all my tests done I was supposed to meet with her again to review the results. I was under the impression that I would be contacted if anything came out abnormal but I wasn't. The NP I saw the following time I visited the clinic a few months later in October told me that my progesterone was fine and not to worry. The same NP repeated that information the second time I asked. DW is so upset right now because another thing RE confirmed today was that my AMH is very low (which I just found out last month because I asked for the results) and that I need to be taking clomid ASAP to help with my ovulation. She said basically the egg quality is not what it should be. As I said, DW is livid and feels like we have just wasted 3 months of trying (5 vials of sperm) when my RE has now said we should have been using clomid from the get go. The RE also told me I need to be taking CoQ10, Omega 3's and baby aspirin. And, she prescribed me progesterone to start ASAP.

 

I am actually feeling really good about finally having answers even if they are 6 months late. If this last insem doesn't work I will be going in for baseline U/S CD1-5,  my HSG CD7-10, second U/S CD12-14, trigger shot and then insem. Lots of money for all of this which is hugely stressful.

 

I also emailed some donors and joined Known Donor Registry to try and find some fresh sperm smile.gif. If no one pans out I will be ordering one IUI vial and one ICI vial this cycle so we can do two insems. One ICI at home and one IUI at Kaiser. 

 

Question for anyone who wants to weigh in..We went with our current bank because they have a lower family limit (was 10 and now went up to 25) and a lot of WTBK donors. Both of these variables are very important to us. How would you feel going from something so regulated to working with a known donor that doesn't have those types of rules?  Also, the RE told us about a local bank so we wouldn't have to pay so much for shipping but again we would probably have to go to anonymous sperm and higher family limit. Our sperm money has officially run out and we will be paying out of pocket from now on. This will mean credit cards and cutting out a lot of other expenses like cable, eating out, travel etc..

post #403 of 585

escher, I appreciate your comments on Brill. I found it somewhat useful but agree that it almost makes achieving pregnancy sound easy... And it didn't convey anything to me about the sheer amount of *waiting* that would be involved, which is the aspect of TTC that I've found more difficult than anything else. Good luck with tomorrow's u/s!

 

I'm glad your dogs are getting along, twomommyfamily! Hope tonight's trigger goes well... Got your full positive yet?

 

Darcy, I used to crochet and found it wayyyy easier than knitting, because it was easier to correct my mistakes... But I think the stitches themselves are harder. After a while I realized that I much prefer the way a knitted object looks compared to crochet, so switched crafts; I was also heavily influenced by my older sister, who is a professional knitter/knitting pattern designer. I always recommend that newbies make a scarf or a cowl for themselves, with simple stitches and really big needles and the nicest wool they can afford, so that they actually finish it and want to wear it and then get compliments on it... Nothing inspires future projects better than getting good feedback! How was your appointment today?

 

Yes, Sphinxy, I admit that at times I *do* get resentful about the questions coming from those privileged enough to get pregnant easily and without a thought! But I have a couple very close friends currently experiencing infertility in hetero relationships and it makes me *so glad* that I don't have to go through that... DP and I always knew we'd need a bit of help, you know? And I love your Cirque de Soleil quote! As I've mentioned on here before, my job requires a lot of heavy lifting, and I long ago had to give up on the idea I'd get to take it easy during the TWW.

 

Heh heh, chortles, yes!!! This choir is saying AMEN too!

 

Good advice, Friedrike, and I'm inspired by your running half-marathons, pregnant or not. I'm gearing up for a 10 km race in a couple months, and it's taking a lot of training for me to feel ready; maybe I'll look into what longer races there are around here for after that, to keep the momentum going!

 

Great news on the progesterone, Lizbian! I just checked my bloodwork results from last week, and it was my progesterone level of 17 nmol/L that made the RE think I'd ovulated (well, that and the corpus luteum in my ovary seen in the u/s), so even without knowing what your base level usually is, 29 sure sounds like a confirmation of ovulation to me!

 

You're sounding so zen about the TWW, scorp! Good for you... And so I'll refrain from symptom spotting, even though I want to soooo much, because I need to live vicariously through all of you who are waiting to know! FX and baby dust...

 

KWPX2, on the other hand, I just can't help myself from saying that your emotional reactions sound like a pretty good sign... So sorry about the flu! What crappy timing! I've also got FX and baby dust sending your way.

 

Sandiego, I can't even imagine how hard it would be to see your pregnant sister... Or actually I can, because my sister is also planning to get pregnant but not until next year, and when she told me this my immediate reaction was to be totally terrified she'd get pregnant before me (her partner is male). I'm not proud of that, especially because I love her so much, and she's already two years older than me so doesn't have as long as I do to TTC! Yes, your time will come soon. And when it does, it will all be worth it. And your kid will have a cousin, which will be so great.

 

FX for you, lea2012! Odd breast expansion, what?!! I didn't know about that symptom! Ahh, the things one learns here in QC... Thanks for sharing!

 

Onward and upward indeed, soto! Glad your RE visit went well... It sounds like the extra monitoring will be really useful. I'm curious: I know PDX isn't very far from Seattle, but to my foreign eyes it still seems like a long trek for a birth... How would you get there? How soon into labour would you go?

 

I'm chart-stalking you, fmorris... You've got a good long luteal phase going on! That's so great! I'm on the 9th day of mine, and already feel cramps starting... Which isn't terribly short, if AF comes tomorrow, but still not ideal.

 

AFM: Thanks for your kindness re: my bad feelings around my ex's new baby. I appreciate it. Nothing else to report... Twiddling my thumbs, waiting for AF!

 

Question of the Day:

Where, at this point in your thought and planning process, is your ideal place to give birth and why?

I'd like a home birth, maybe in a water tub... But DP is against both those ideas! I like being in my own space, with my own comforts around me (and water just sounds nice). DP and I'll have plenty of time to hash it out... And regardless, I'll have a midwife, and she could also deliver the kid at the hospital if we go that route, so I feel good about that.

post #404 of 585

Darcy, wow, that is so much... I am so sorry. I would be f-ing LIVID. I am glad there is a plan ahead with a clear diagnosis of sorts. I wish RE would pay for the sperm you already bought! Here's hoping you won't have to worry about this, and you'll get a BFP!

post #405 of 585

SanDiego - my doctor prescribed oral capsules, 100mg. Like Friederike mentioned, my doctor cautioned me that it might make me sleepy or woozy, so I only took it right before I went to sleep. 

 

Thanks for the support everyone. The waiting...sigh.

post #406 of 585
ZOMG Darcy!! That is so nuts! I'm with scorp, I would be livid... And in fact am, on your behalf. Is there any chance of getting any money back from them at all?!! What a mess. I'm impressed by your ability to focus on the positives. Fx for you!
post #407 of 585

I'm always lurking, but I love QOTD so I'm going to chime in.  I'm a NICU RN, so homebirth is OUT (even though it's safer in low risk pregnancies!!  I see too many scary things!).  We live outside of the "catchmen" area for my hospital, but our lovely lovely hospital lets their staff deliver there, no matter where they live (and option taken by almost all of the staff).  They have single room maternity units, so ideally we will be there with a midwife.  They're baby friendly certified, plus if anything goes horribly horribly wrong, I knew my crew is there to take care of business (although if it's DW whose pregnant, they're going to have to restrain me to keep me from getting involved!  Ha!)

 

Granite, SunRun?  Once I'm over this ridiculously stupid cold I'm going to start training (I ran all fall, but then stopped in early December because I needed an inhaler but didn't have one... augh!).  Do you guys have the stupid fog that we have??  It's pretty, makes for rather eerie setting.

 

Darcy: Um... wtf.  I would've been so pissed.  I'm glad YOU seem to have made peace with it, and good luck in the future!!

 

Soto: I did have my fingers crossed for you.  So sorry it didn't work out, I am well familiar with that incredibly crushing disappointment of "EVERYTHING LOOKS GOOD... ANNNNDDDD BFN....."

 

Scorpio: good luck!!!

 

Sorry to all I missed!!

 

AFU: Still no foreseeable plan.  DW will apply (and hopefully be accepted) into a program in September for school.  I've decided to pay off *all* our debt in the meantime, as I suddenly realized that if we do have to switch, me being off for a year on mat leave income (EI is like 60%, my work will top up to 90something% for 6 or 8 months, but I get shift differential for all my nights/weekends, plus stats, so I wouldn't get any of that) will be impossible if we have debt (excluding student loans and our mortgage).  Not sure why it took me 3 years to realize this... but better now than never!  We also have to accumulate $3K as a "first payment" for the RE, which will be a piece of cake once I'm not shoving every extra cent into my debt!!  :D  I'm so happy to know that we will start our family debt free and not have to worry about it.  I can work as much OT as I want now and not feel like I'm "missing out" on too much, whereas doing OT when we have a little one will make me grumpy and resentful!  

 

It's still incredibly hard not to be joining you guys at the moment though!!  I actually miss the stress and chaos of OPKs and timing etc, so I live vicariously through all of you.

 

Baby dust to all of you!

post #408 of 585

Sandiego, There are a couple of places around here I want to look into. I think it would be good for stress too. How long did your session last the first time? I'm super interested! lol Hope you and DW get some nice time together before you get back in it :)

 

Pokey, I did not know that! I've paid OOP for all those costs! Thanks for the info bc I wasn't aware of that being covered. I know I could get the insems covered, but as for swimmers..no idea! THanks!

 

Scorp, Hope those are good pangs of a squishy one getting ready to settle in soon!

 

Darcy, You're more than welcome. I was very curious/nervous/excited the first time taking it, but didn't know what I should expect. So I figured I'd share what I went through. OO wow, well geez prospective swim team! Maybe you'll find one who hasn't impregnated any of your friends ;) lol Glad that you finally got some answers and have a better idea of your game plan. And you're absolutely right it can be kinda pricey. When I asked for an RX for the trigger mye OB wrote it, and when I went to Walgreens it was $210. I did find it at Freedom Fertility Pharmacy for around $75 with free shipping, and they're out of Massatchusetts. Woohoo for joining KDR. I forgot I joined and when I logged on had people offering meeh services! lol the search came to meeh on that one! I also have reservations about the KD and how completely different it is from working with a bank. I believe as long as ALL the proper paperwork is in order I would be at ease, but it is a bit frightening! The things we sacrifice in TTC, best of luck with it all!

 

Granite, Soooo funny bc I look at your chart after I look at mine!!! I'm hoping it'll stay right at 13 days, that way I'll know mye LP is pretty much the same, just mye O nd cycle length are the variants now! Mye chart is actually starting to look like a real chart lol! Maybe AF will hold out for just a bit longer so we can get that longer LP! Stay on the road AF! Looks like we're on the same page about the birthing options, but DP is pretty weary about it as well! lol

 

AFM, I've had the WEIRDEST things biting meeh nd can't figure out what! Its been over a period of weeks, but I'll have a couple of mosquito like bites that itch like itching is going out of style and are swollen nd red. They go down after a while, but feels like once they do they leve the tiniest bit of a bump. They show up when I'm at work and at home and I am lost because that makes pinpointing the source much harder! Just today literally out of no where I had 7 of them appear around the same time on mye arm and the bumps are huge!!! I clean the house like crazy, and havent switched laundry soap or anything. I feel like letting a rabid mountain lion maul mye arm to death just to stop the itching! Hydrocortisone is NOT working, looks like Benadryl after I get off!! *SIGH*

post #409 of 585

Cheers to living vicariously, darth! I'm with you on that... Though I shouldn't complain, cuz I just might get to finally have a try at this cycle...

 

Not the SunRun, but our version of it: TC10K. I was actually trying to talk DP into doing the SunRun as our practice run, as it's the week before, but she nixed the idea and said I should be happy enough that she's willing to do one giant race and leave it at that! Heh heh... I am, I am. Last year I ran it alone and it wasn't as much fun as this is shaping up to be. I also have asthma! But it's been pretty dormant lately, and I'm keeping my FX that it won't get in my way.

 

Yes, the fog! It's been so crazy... I've mostly been working downtown, which is sea level and relatively fog-free, but then last night I had to go to a training up towards the airport and when I left to go home I could barely see the other cars on the highway! I kinda like it though... We never saw that sort of thing when I was growing up in Toronto.

 

I'm liking your financial plans, too. The one blessing of all the delays I've faced in the TTC train so far is that it's allowed more time for DP and I to pay down debts and for me to gain seniority (with automatic wages increases) at my job. It's terrible, actually: I calculated it out and if I don't get pregnant and then take maternity leave until a year from now, we might even get rid of all our debt, including DP's crazy huge student loans (we're renters, so no mortgage yet). But I want to have a baby soooooo much right nooooooowwwwww... The baby/finances combo makes me totally whiny!

 

Glad you're still lurking.

 

Speaking of lurkers, any chance fillefantome is around? What's shaking, how are you, where are you at? Missing you!


Edited by granite - 1/22/13 at 7:51pm
post #410 of 585

Crosspost, fmorris! Ahhhhh, omg is it SCABIES??!! Sorry to bring up bad scenarios but eeek! Go to the doc, quick quick!

 

(Having said that, I've gotten totally weird fungal rashes before, and the doc's just said to let it be irked.gif)

post #411 of 585

Twomommyfamily - Wishing you well on the trigger tonight!

 

Darcy - What restraint you have! I would also be very upset. It just seems to reason that your doc would have updated you with information outside of normal as opposed to the way things happened. Also, previously you asked if we were on the east coast...we are in KY.

 

Scorpioma-  I hurt for several days after the IUI. Like O pain only I felt it in my uterus too. Keeping my fingers crossed for both of us!

 

Soto -  Thank you so much for the encouragement! Your revised plan sounds like it will really zero in and nail your O! We will be sending lots of baby dust your way upcoming!

 

AFM,

I know I am forgetting others so please don't take it as a slight. There has been so much insemming of late it is hard for me to keep up with who is at what stage right now. I appreciate all the sympathy for the flu and encouragement regarding my big emotional day yesterday! I felt so much better today I actually went back to work. The Tamiflu is kicking the flu's butt for sure! It was pricey but worth every penny. In the baby-making realm....no big news today but I did POAS to test out the HCG trigger. I figured a couple days with a fever (Hypermetabolic) might metabolize the trigger out early. I thought I would have to POAS several days to test it out and was pleasantly surprised at the results. Today we are a BFN which is good news because any BFP from this point on is NOT the trigger!

 

Regarding QOTD-

I think in a perfect world I would like to have a home birth assisted by a CNM. However since this world is far from perfect and I am "of advanced maternal age" so we will seek out the only birthing center available to us at this point. There is an OB-GYN practice with a CNM serving it. Evidently there is another practice in town with midwives but they seem very political, mentioning church affiliations and the fact that they serve a local anti-choice organization. I suspect they may not be for us. The idea of a birthing tub sounds good to me I would really prefer to be as mobile as possible until I gave in and screamed for an epudural! smile.gif I am opposed to an induction for sure and would like to be allowed to let things progress as they will.  It is also very important to us to have contact with the baby right after birth and that the staff aren't compelled to bottle feed our baby. 

post #412 of 585

KWXP2... Ha! Here's something I rarely write: Yay for the BFN!!

 

What's a CNM? And do they really bottle-feed newborns as matter of course in some birthing centres?!!

post #413 of 585
Granite- thanks...we do hope to see it change by this time next week!

CNM - certified nurse midwife. And we understand that yes, some hospitals in the area ( and beyond) give a bottle to newborns as a "convenience" to the new Mom.
post #414 of 585
Granite- we actually live in Vancouver, WA. It's right across the Columbia river from Portland, OR. In fact we live right along the river- well two blocks away- so Portland is less than 1 minute away by car. We used to live in Seattle though- from December 2010 to October 2011.
post #415 of 585

Oh! Sorry for the mix-up! I think I was confused because you mentioned writing for a Seattle lesbian website... But yes, I've been to Vancouver, WA, and realize it'd be no distance at all to a birth centre in PDX! Lucky you smile.gif

post #416 of 585
For the question of the day, I'm now thinking I would move to Portland and birth at the same place as Soto! That sounds awesome!

Pokey thanks for the great financial insights - IIRC you do asset mgmt for high net worth clients or am I making that up? We've been thinking we need to swap to a new LGBTQ tax accountant now that we're DP'd and starting a family - there are so many nuances! That's great that we can use FSA
for sperm smile.gif

I know I'm missing a lot but I'm on my phone - sending good vibes to everyone!
post #417 of 585

Darcy - From what I know, progesterone is started after O until AF shows up. If the dose is very high it's possible AF never shows, then they recommend a pregnancy test. If that one is negative several days after the normal LP, you should stop taking it to let the new cycle begin. If it's positive they recommend keeping taking progesterone until 12 weeks or so, because then the placenta takes over the hormone production.

Also wanted to say - I would have punched something if I were in your place. 6 months and they never discussed the results. I would write a letter and complain about that, to at least make them realize how important doc-patient communication is and how much it affects people.

 

 

granite - yay for runners.The 10k is my second favorite distance after marathons and ultras. I am actually not a fan of half-maras that much, you have to run them at a pace almost as fast as a 10k, but the time when is starts getting painful is much longer winky.gif I actually know somebody who ran a marathon at 3 months and another at 5 months, visibly preggnant. I would be way too much of a chicken to ever do that. The kid turned out great, she has since accompanied her mom in a jogging stroller to many more races.

 

SanDiego - I totally feel your pain about the preggo sister. My little sister is currently pregnant with her third child in 4 years and it is so tough to be around her. My younger brother also has a two year old. It is extra hard because I am the oldest sibling. Being 33 and without babe while they are having them in their twenties makes me feel ancient and lead to lots of impatience.

 

fmorris - I would be totally paranoid if I were in your place. Whenever I travel to other countries with strange flora and fauna I always have those weird thoughts about horrible spiders laying their eggs in  my skin or so. I hope the Benadryl does it job.


Edited by Friederike - 1/23/13 at 6:39am
post #418 of 585
Thread Starter 

Friederike - Ooh, Hormone Detective. I feel like we should be able to make some sort of made-for-TV melodrama movie out of that. 

 

escher - Yay for your positive OPK - good luck today!

 

sotohana - So glad you have a plan. What a relief to get some advice and guidance. Also, I am with chortles - a birthing B&B with take-out on demand? Sign me up!

 

fmorris - Yay for DP taking "baby" steps to get more involved! Also, I'm with granite - get yourself to a doctor and have those bites checked out!

 
scorp - Exciting signs!! You are doing a great job this TWW.
Darcy - Ugh, I am with the others, what a terrible experience! If that were me, DW would have to restrain me Cuss.gif That said, I am really impressed with your determination to move forward. In answer to your question, the family limit and regulation is a major reason why we chose to work with our specific bank. There are a lot of "what ifs" that come up with a KD that we were not interested in taking on. To me, the bank switching to a family limit of 25 would not make me comfortable, and I would probably seek out a different bank with a 10 family limit. Of course, it's really a personal decision and you just have to do what feels right to you. There are so many factors to consider. 
 
darthtuna - Good to hear from you! We too are working on a major debt pay down to hopefully be complete (or very nearly so) by the time a baby arrives - it feels so good.
 
KWPX2 - OMG I would be so pissed if someone gave my baby a bottle with asking me first. It's surprising how practices can vary so much in different places. I live just outside NYC now, where from what I understand you can't get formula for your baby after birth without a documented medical reason anymore (basically, it's like needing a prescription). Personally, I think that's taking lactivism a step too far - can't we just empower and trust women to make the best decisions for themselves?
 
Afm, OMG I feel so sick. I started feeling a few pangs of nausea last night but I chalked it up to having consumed too many of the chocolate truffles that a coworker sent to me (I think I had four or five). But then I woke up at 5:30 and my stomach felt so gross, and it seemed too long after to be from the truffles. I couldn't tell if it was nausea or cramps or gas or anxiety, but I could not get back to sleep. I am so nervous to take this as a good sign, because I think 6DPO is way too early to be having these kinds of symptoms. So, I'm sitting up in bed typing to you all to distract myself from it as best I can. DW did get up about 30 minutes ago to get me some peppermint tea and a banana, which is helping a bit. 
This afternoon I'm heading off for a business trip for the next few days, so I may not be in touch as much until the weekend, but please know that I'm thinking of you all! dust.gif

Edited by Sphinxy - 1/23/13 at 4:56am
post #419 of 585

Sphinxy: have fun on your trip! I hope it keeps you happily distracted from tww. Also, not to get TOO excited, but feeling sick is a good sign...even at 6DPO! I mean, your body is going through changes if you are preg. no matter what DPO it is (Dr. Sarah Speaks. Ha. I mean, I know they say it's too early, but if you're sick you're sick!)

 

escher: Good luck today!! Keep us posted!

 

QOTD:

I want to give birth with a CNM who did an IUI for us a couple months back, who worked with Brill of the Brill book. She is so awesome and queer knowledgeable. I want to give birth at home, but we live in a town-home so I will ask our CNM to come see it and see if it's doable. If not, then there is a birthing center at U of Michigan that is amazing and our insurance covers in it's entirety. I have watched the Business of Being Born a couple times and am really moved to have a home birth, it seems to be beautiful and there is not so much invasion by nurses, OBs, nurse shift changes, Pitocin-pushing staff, etc. I have enjoyed hearing everyone's plan! Not too different from each other, really!

also, I echo granite, fille? merstone? LindseyW? How ya doing? orngbiggrin.gif I think you can switch categories here soon, a couple of you!  biggrinbounce.gif

Hope you are well and pop in soon to say hey!

 

afm, having some anxiety today. just feeling like I will never get pregnant and it's probably like last month. I need an attitude check, and to relax... no more zen. Lol.


Edited by scorpioma - 1/23/13 at 6:55am
post #420 of 585
Hi Everyone,

Sotohana: It sounds like you have a good plan. I'm glad that the RE was helpful, and I'm glad that you're feeling a bit better. Onward and upward indeed!

SanDiego: I had an HSG a couple of years ago, and I found it to be much less painful than I had feared. I didn't think it was any worse than a pap. I hope your wife's goes well!

Scorpioma: It sounds like you have some interesting symptoms! fingersx.gif I'm sorry you're feeling less relaxed about it today. The wait is hard.

Darcy: How completely annoying that you didn't have that information until now. REs can be so ridiculous. But how exciting that you have so much more information now! Everyone has different views on this, but I personally feel like it is worth paying extra money to have a wtbk donor, just so that the kid can have the option of getting in touch with the donor if that ends up feeling important to him/her. But I hear you about how expensive the whole process is.

Darthtunaqueen: It sounds like you work at a lovely hospital. I'm impressed by your financial plan--it seems like you're thinking carefully about how to make it all work.

Fmorris: Those bites don't sound like fun at all! I had some like that a few months ago, and I finally got them checked out because one was infected. The doctor thought maybe they were spider bites but didn't seem concerned at all. I hope yours go away soon!

KWPX2: It's exciting that any bfp you get now will be a valid result! Hopefully you'll get one soon! fingersx.gif

Sphinxy: That sounds like quite some nausea! fingersx.gif

As for us: IUI this morning! I'm not entirely sure about the timing. She had a positive opk early afternoon yesterday, but yesterday evening it was negative again. (Doesn't it mean something bad if the window of the surge is pretty short?) The RE thought it looked like she had ovulated last night or this morning. So we may have been too late. Anyway, her lining looked good, and her cervix was decently open, so I think it was worth trying. Can you please move me to waiting to know? Thanks!
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