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~~~~2013 Low Income Support Thread~~~~ - Page 13

post #241 of 1405
Oh crunchymonkey. Offering you peace and recovery.

I haven't been on much this week since its just been exhausting. Hubby is working lots of overtime and the kids were having a rough couple days. Witb all his overtime we haven't been able to set up any appointment s but we did call to check on the waiting time for the ped dentist, which amazingly is usually under a week. So once things slow down a bit we can make an appt and he can take a vacation day if need be. If nothing else I think I will schedule an eye exam near mothers day, as new eyewear would actually be fun to me.

On the plusside all the overtime and the fact hubby is doing a weight loss challenge will equal money in our pockets. Weight loss challenge equals less food out and less snacking a t work, which are two of our worst money suckers. Oh, and my mom is finally all done with her computer so it plus a desk will be ours this Saturday. IM having my nephew and dh link educational games for dd, and once we get ink for our printer I can also print off work sheets.
post #242 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post

crunchymonkey, I'm so sorry to hear about your baby.  I have a friend who had a 10week miscarriage and she was pretty traumatized by it.  She and the father of the baby ended up burying the sac/baby at their favorite hiking spot  in a small clearing off the path.  They marked it with a nice flat stone and she said it helps her to have a place to visit her baby from time to time to feel like he/she wasn't forgotten.  They occasionally go there and leave some wildflowers.  That was really instrumental in her feeling like she had closure.  For many reasons it didn't happen until about 3 weeks after the miscarriage and she was a wreck until she could bury the baby.  But once it was done, I guess she felt like she had grieved and given her child a burial and could move on with her life(though it's not easy for her to talk about 6 months later).

 

I didn't include this because I just didn't know what the response would be, but we're considering doing something like that. We just aren't sure right now. I might sound like a horrible person, but thinking about the positives about not having a baby on the way really helps. Baby wasn't planned and honestly we aren't ready for another one. For one thing, our very attached and clingy (albeit happy, curious, intelligent, and amazing) one year old is not ready to share us, that's for sure.

 

On a better note, my daughters first birthday is Sunday. I'm about to go to the store and get some hot dog stuff for the little get together we're having and mayybeee find a birthday dress or maybe just a light sweater to put over a dress we have. It's only going to be a high of 70 on Sunday and the nice dress that fits her right now has a cut out in the back and tank top straps. In Texas, 70 is worthy of a light jacket lol

 

 

Honor Noble, yay for the overtime money, and I hope you get some rest soon! 

post #243 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by crunchymonkey View Post

I didn't include this because I just didn't know what the response would be, but we're considering doing something like that. We just aren't sure right now. I might sound like a horrible person, but thinking about the positives about not having a baby on the way really helps. Baby wasn't planned and honestly we aren't ready for another one. For one thing, our very attached and clingy (albeit happy, curious, intelligent, and amazing) one year old is not ready to share us, that's for sure.

On a better note, my daughters first birthday is Sunday. I'm about to go to the store and get some hot dog stuff for the little get together we're having and mayybeee find a birthday dress or maybe just a light sweater to put over a dress we have. It's only going to be a high of 70 on Sunday and the nice dress that fits her right now has a cut out in the back and tank top straps. In Texas, 70 is worthy of a light jacket lol


Honor Noble, yay for the overtime money, and I hope you get some rest soon! 

Out of curiosity, where in tx are you? I'm in Killeen, grew up in san angelo..
post #244 of 1405

Hello everyone. I'm new and look forward to being part of this group. I know its hard, but I try to remind myself it will just make us stronger.  I am a sahm of 5 with no#6 due this summer.  I hope to be able to share things about our life and struggles without judgement.  We had better days, its not like I had all of my children expecting my husband to lose his job, insurance, everything.  We are using FS now and Medicad, and we are on the WIC program.  With this baby I was embrassed to go to the doctor at first, but I realize that nothing I could have done would have changed this course in life, and hubby is now working 2 jobs to try to better us once more. I just looked at the nurse and told her we have the rest of our lives to worry about money, but only a short time to have children.We had already got use to having no cable and no cellphone package, just a simple card phone.  We have internet at home, but dail up only.  Also we took part in a government phone package where we have a landline phone at a set price each month.  Our vans are paid for, thank God.  We purchased a Chevy Astro to fit this new baby in, so that way we wouldn't spend the high cost of gas for a passenger van.  A few years ago we bulit our home with Habitat , but that was bc we qualified bc our home we had was falling apart, although we had to donate the land we worked hard to pay off, so now we are paying that back which that payment is a huge blessing of $278 a month for 4 bds and 2bths.  We where treated horribly during the process though.  I homeschool and usally use our tax money to buy those things and our spring/summer clothes (after going through the handme downs of course), yet this year it didn't go as far bc we had a title loan to pay off that we did to buy Christmas for last year.  I work hard to stretch our budget (homemade everything, thrift store, clothing closets, cloth diaper, homemade cleaners.)  I just hate getting the judgemental looks when ppl see our family size and just assume we keep having children bc of assistance.  I want to wear a shirt that says " My husband had a great job, lots of overtime, 401K, insurance, traveled, etc."  But then I just realize I need to blow it off and focus on my family and taking care of them.  Sorry I wrote so much for the first time.  Also wanted to say I'm reading a wonderful blog  Blissful and Domestic, and I've learned alot there too.

post #245 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by crunchymonkey View Post

Warning, I'm going to talk a lot about my thoughts about the miscarriage. In case anyone is sensitive to it, it may be a bit much for some. Nothing low income related at all.

 

 

Thanks guys. Got the blood work back earlier today. My hcg levels are reducing, so we did lose the baby about a week or two ago. Just waiting to really start miscarrying. Mentally I feel like I'm about to start a hellish journey. I think because the baby was unplanned and all we could think about was that we weren't ready for it, we never bonded or got attached. We balled all yesterday, but now we're pretty okay with a few moments of not being okay...What I'm worried about now is going through the miscarriage. When you get pregnant and read about what can cause a miscarriage and the symptoms, all you hear is about what an early miscarriage (4-6 weeks) looks like. It's described as a heavy painful period. But now realizing that a 9ish week miscarriage is going to be more than that. I'm scared, just ready for it to be over. Trying to read about natural things that I can do to help it along, not speed it up, but just to make sure that it completes and hopefully keep me from bleeding too much. I really hope to avoid a D&C. My fiance has told his family members that knew I was pregnant about it and that I don't want to talk about it. They're being really great about it. Still avoiding his grandparents because they tend to make a joke out of everything and I'm not ready to a hear them say anything about it.

 

I also just want to send a hug to everyone who's had a miscarriage and I want to apologize to someone that I said something to when she had a miscarriage that I now realize was stupid. Haven't figured out how to say it yet, but I will.

I'm so sorry for your loss, I've lost two.  I know its different for everyone.  Hope you finding healing and peace, and take all the time you need to do both.

post #246 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by BamaMom7 View Post

Hello everyone. I'm new and look forward to being part of this group. I know its hard, but I try to remind myself it will just make us stronger.  I am a sahm of 5 with no#6 due this summer.  I hope to be able to share things about our life and struggles without judgement.  We had better days, its not like I had all of my children expecting my husband to lose his job, insurance, everything.  We are using FS now and Medicad, and we are on the WIC program.  With this baby I was embrassed to go to the doctor at first, but I realize that nothing I could have done would have changed this course in life, and hubby is now working 2 jobs to try to better us once more. I just looked at the nurse and told her we have the rest of our lives to worry about money, but only a short time to have children.We had already got use to having no cable and no cellphone package, just a simple card phone.  We have internet at home, but dail up only.  Also we took part in a government phone package where we have a landline phone at a set price each month.  Our vans are paid for, thank God.  We purchased a Chevy Astro to fit this new baby in, so that way we wouldn't spend the high cost of gas for a passenger van.  A few years ago we bulit our home with Habitat , but that was bc we qualified bc our home we had was falling apart, although we had to donate the land we worked hard to pay off, so now we are paying that back which that payment is a huge blessing of $278 a month for 4 bds and 2bths.  We where treated horribly during the process though.  I homeschool and usally use our tax money to buy those things and our spring/summer clothes (after going through the handme downs of course), yet this year it didn't go as far bc we had a title loan to pay off that we did to buy Christmas for last year.  I work hard to stretch our budget (homemade everything, thrift store, clothing closets, cloth diaper, homemade cleaners.)  I just hate getting the judgemental looks when ppl see our family size and just assume we keep having children bc of assistance.  I want to wear a shirt that says " My husband had a great job, lots of overtime, 401K, insurance, traveled, etc."  But then I just realize I need to blow it off and focus on my family and taking care of them.  Sorry I wrote so much for the first time.  Also wanted to say I'm reading a wonderful blog  Blissful and Domestic, and I've learned alot there too.

 

 

Welcome!  I only have 3 children but I'm single.  I get those looks too when I pull out our food stamps card.  It's not fair.  I was a married woman to a military member.  Life sometimes throws us curveballs.  But you sound like you are doing absolutely everything in your power to pinch those pennies until they scream.  You are doing the best you can and hopefully something will come through for your husband and things will look up again and you can get rid of the assistance.  It's just temporary, remember that!

post #247 of 1405

Thank you for the welcome!! I keep reading about others doing surveys.  I was wondering about doing them myself...I mean it would be nice to get a little treat here and there.  I'm a memeber of a "items for sale" on facebook that goes on in my area, hopefully some of that will sell and I could add more cloth diapers to the house.  I'm keeping my eye out in the thrift stores for a bread machine I so want to luck up and find one, someday, lol.  Mother's Day is coming up...I don't have a mom to buy for, she passed almost 4 years ago and I told the hubby to let the kids get into the arts and crafts and just make me "orginal" Presents are a biggey to me anyway.  I'd also like to add, that if I still had cable or other tv I'd totally missed out on how great British tv is!! I love Downton Abbey, Call the Midwife, Are you Being Served and Keeping up Apperances!! joy.gif

post #248 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by micah_mae_ View Post


Out of curiosity, where in tx are you? I'm in Killeen, grew up in san angelo..

I'm out in the country southwest of Houston. After todays weather I decided she'd be warm enough in a dress but got her a dress anyways =) Plus my sister in law bought her some too. And I decided to get a dress that I found at Ross for $15 for the wedding. I was going to make one, but I really loved this and I can wear it for the rest of summer so I went ahead and did that instead. The pattern for my dress was going to cost about $10 anyways.

 

Since everything started going south on Monday we've completely forgotten about finances and bills. It finally hit us again yesterday. The fact that we forgot that we had money things to stress about probably stressed us more than the bills themselves.

 

Welcome BamaMom. Brush off what anyone says or thinks, life has got to be hectic and stressful enough with 5.5 babies as it is. 

post #249 of 1405

BamaMom, try this recipe if you have loaf pans.  It's VERY good.  I don't have a bread machine but we love this recipe for old school loaf pan bread.  Takes 10minutes MAYBE of active work.  My 5 year old can do it herself, no lie.  http://beautythatmoves.typepad.com/beauty_that_moves/2008/10/here-we-are-it-is-october-there-is-very-little-that-is-more-beautiful-than-october-in-new-england-most-of-our-children.html

post #250 of 1405

BamaMom - Welcome! Don't let the looks get you down - it's none of their business :) For surveys, check out the survey boards on Slickdeals - I do that and get quite a few. I'm doing a $70 Amazon GC one right now, which will go for paying for hsing needs / DD's Birthday. 

 

 

For those of you homeschooling - don't forget you can send a request for materials to The Book Samaritan! The provide hsing materials no questions asked - just write them a letter with a list of what you need. We're using them for the second year in a row to get the things I haven't been able to find used at thrift shops locally. 

 

 

We're barely keeping out heads above water. I found a bunch of hsing books cheap at one of the local thrift shops & sold some of them locally, which has helped. I should have some local HS book swaps coming up soon where I can sell off the extra books I have which will help. Hopefully tomorrow the person I have coming for some bigger items buys them - that would let us pay bills this month. Our Electric bill came in and thank goodness it was WAY lower. I'm torn between just paying it if I can or trying to get assistance to pay it so that I can make our tiny tiny cash supply go further. Thinking about trying to get some type of job, but I can't come up with anything. I need to be able to take dd with me, so the only things open are stuff like cleaning churches or babysitting. 

post #251 of 1405

frugalmama, how are YOU doing?  Are you doing okay?

post #252 of 1405

Justmama - I'm keeping my head above water. I'm stressed from finances, dealing with health issues that just won't quit, and incredibly tired from trying to do too much, but mostly okay. I need a mama break without dd for a few hours but it's not going to happen. DD is being really clingy lately and is terrified I'm going to leave her too. She was like this after my dad passed but not as bad. 

post #253 of 1405

I was sharing with my husband about the Book Samaritan.  Could any of you give me tips on what to put on my letter??  I would be very thankful for your advice.  We are kinda electric (if thats the right title?) we use a little of  this and a little of that.  Some Charolette Mason and some textbooks and workbooks and lots of hands on.  Anywhoo...Looking forward to some tips!!

post #254 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by BamaMom7 View Post

I was sharing with my husband about the Book Samaritan.  Could any of you give me tips on what to put on my letter??  I would be very thankful for your advice.  We are kinda electric (if thats the right title?) we use a little of  this and a little of that.  Some Charolette Mason and some textbooks and workbooks and lots of hands on.  Anywhoo...Looking forward to some tips!!

 

I just give a little info on why I can't afford HS stuff right now {like the one I just sent in said I couldn't afford because my Mom passed away and was the main source of income}, and then a list of what I needed - i.e. 3rd grade math and open to ABC, MNO, and XYZ ones. I try to be a specific as possible as we are kinda picky & use SL. I'd rather send in another request because they didn't have what I needed than to get something we can't or won't use. 

 

So basically send them your wishlist. I have been amazed the times we used it at how much of my wishlist I was able to get through them. 

post #255 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by frugalmama View Post

 

I just give a little info on why I can't afford HS stuff right now {like the one I just sent in said I couldn't afford because my Mom passed away and was the main source of income}, and then a list of what I needed - i.e. 3rd grade math and open to ABC, MNO, and XYZ ones. I try to be a specific as possible as we are kinda picky & use SL. I'd rather send in another request because they didn't have what I needed than to get something we can't or won't use. 

 

So basically send them your wishlist. I have been amazed the times we used it at how much of my wishlist I was able to get through them. 

Thank you so much for the tips! I've been working on a "rough draft" this evening.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  My mother (not my birth mother, but the only real mother I had) passed a few years back, if you ever need to talk about anything I'm a open book. 

post #256 of 1405

frugalmama, hugs. Having clingy kiddos can be really draining especially on top of anything else you're dealing with. I don't think I said it earlier and I'm sorry that I didn't, but I'm sorry about your mom. hugs for that too.

 

 

Just an update, I went to the hospital last night because I was bleeding so heavily. Actually kind of a blessing, turns out I was losing everything at once, not truly bleeding. Which means I really won't be dealing with the miscarriage today (well, physically). Which is awesome because....

 

Happy 1st Birthday to my beautiful amazing wonderful smart active cuddly loving sweet funny silly little girl

 

Her birthday party is today. I'm about to make some breakfast, make her cake icing, pick up my sister in law and we'll be heading to it. Also, she's trying to climb on the windowsill right now....and taking the door stop out of the wall

 

Has been a really weird week. Hopefully seeing friends and family today brings some peace to my world (may just bring stress to my fiance since he doesn't like groups) and we can get back to something resembling normal next week.

post #257 of 1405
frugalmama, I didn't quote you.  I forgot.  But I'm glad you are making it through.  I imagine losing a parent, especially one who lives iwth you and spends their days with you, is so incredibly hard.  I was laying in bed this morning waking up and heard my 5 year old suddenly wake and the first words out of her mouth as her eyes opened were "S, we get to see Uma today(that's what they call my mom).  We get to see Uma!  S, are you listening to me???"  Lol.  I can't imagine having them lose her.  I thought of you in that moment and hoping that y ou and your little one were getting along okay.
Quote:
Originally Posted by crunchymonkey View Post

frugalmama, hugs. Having clingy kiddos can be really draining especially on top of anything else you're dealing with. I don't think I said it earlier and I'm sorry that I didn't, but I'm sorry about your mom. hugs for that too.

 

 

Just an update, I went to the hospital last night because I was bleeding so heavily. Actually kind of a blessing, turns out I was losing everything at once, not truly bleeding. Which means I really won't be dealing with the miscarriage today (well, physically). Which is awesome because....

 

Happy 1st Birthday to my beautiful amazing wonderful smart active cuddly loving sweet funny silly little girl

 

Her birthday party is today. I'm about to make some breakfast, make her cake icing, pick up my sister in law and we'll be heading to it. Also, she's trying to climb on the windowsill right now....and taking the door stop out of the wall

 

Has been a really weird week. Hopefully seeing friends and family today brings some peace to my world (may just bring stress to my fiance since he doesn't like groups) and we can get back to something resembling normal next week.

 

Happy 1st birthday to your baby girl!  Enjoy her today.  It just goes way too fast.  My youngest is starting kindergarten this fall.  yikes2.gif  I feel so old when I say things like that.  My oldest will be in high school NEXT September.  I feel even older when I say that!   

 

 

 

 

Had a busy morning making a quadruple batch of waffles to prep for this week of school and replanting some seedlings that aren't making much progress.  I have a neighbor going through a really bad patch and not holding up well so I think I'm making a batch of peppermint patties(her fave candy) today to cheer her up a bit.  And we are headed to my parents' house today to help them build an arbor for my dad's hops plants(he brews beer for a hobby, has for many years).  And I'm going to be stealing a big bag of dry leaves for my baby compost pile we just started and as many pine cones as I can find for mulch for the garden to keep my stupid cats from crapping in it and digging up my plants.  Saw it on pinterest, hoping it works.  But either way it won't cost me anything even if it fails so.......

 

My neighbor that I'm not the biggest fan of(ya know, the one I share walls with) is having her boyfriend of 2 months move in soon.duh.gif  I LOATHE him.  I put up with the fact that she's kind of a spazz, the fact that her kids leave trash and toys all over our shared yard, and the fact that they wreck my kids' toys and the fairy houses they made on our side of the yard.  But I'll be DAMNED if I'm letting this butthead mooch off me and use me for free daycare for their combined 4 kids.  More than once he's tried to mooch things off me, expensive things.  And more than once they've left their kids with me saying they'd be home in an hour or two and left for 5 hours.  I'm afraid to even go outside in my backyard for fear of them mooching off me or roping me into things.  I think I just need to start being mean instead of trying to nicely say no.

 

Gratitude

 

-My sublime station on pandora.  I think I have it just the way I want it.  ROTFLMAO.gif  It made making all those waffles more fun as I danced and listened to my kids roll their eyes and go "mooooom, stooooop."  Haha.  Sometimes it's the little things, ya know?

 

-free garden supplies like leaves and pine cones.

 

-It's sunny this morning!  Such a welcome change from the grey New England winters.  Makes yo u really appreciate spring when it comes again.

 

-my landlord.  I think it's so crazy to say that but as I sit here and edit my post for errors I think, dang girl, he's pretty awesome letting you rip up the lawn for a big garden and have a compost pile and two cats.  lol.gif

post #258 of 1405

I tend to lurk more than I post here because I often just don't know what to say, or can't put my words together well to express my thoughts. However, I have to say I love the sense of community that this board is sharing right now. I wish I could give you all a huge hug grouphug.gif If I haven't said it already Frugalmama and Crunchymonkey I am so sorry for your losses! Healing love and light to you both.

 

My health is not doing so well right now. It is not anything that is life threatening or anything but get through each day is getting difficult and sadly we don't know exactly what it is. The best I can tell I am hypothyroid and have adrenal fatigue. However doctors are no help and I am sort of on my own to figure it out. It is mostly caused by the chronic stress of the last few years since DH lost his job. I need to order some lab tests that the doctors won't but I can't afford them right now. Sigh!

 

We are also in desperate need of a new vehicle. DH has been driving FIL's car for the last few years but it is old and starting to fail, plus it is a huge gas hog. Finding a car in our price range is nearly impossible and embarrassing when I go to the dealerships to see what is available. Then I worry about how it will affect our assistance. I think if we buy a car outright we will lose our medical insurance, and possibly food stamps, because we will have too much "property" and we will NEVER find anything in that price range. If we finance then we are more likely to find something but are then stuck with a payment we can't really afford. I am so tired of doing this dance.  

post #259 of 1405
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciascl View Post

I tend to lurk more than I post here because I often just don't know what to say, or can't put my words together well to express my thoughts. However, I have to say I love the sense of community that this board is sharing right now. I wish I could give you all a huge hug grouphug.gif If I haven't said it already Frugalmama and Crunchymonkey I am so sorry for your losses! Healing love and light to you both.

 

My health is not doing so well right now. It is not anything that is life threatening or anything but get through each day is getting difficult and sadly we don't know exactly what it is. The best I can tell I am hypothyroid and have adrenal fatigue. However doctors are no help and I am sort of on my own to figure it out. It is mostly caused by the chronic stress of the last few years since DH lost his job. I need to order some lab tests that the doctors won't but I can't afford them right now. Sigh!

 

We are also in desperate need of a new vehicle. DH has been driving FIL's car for the last few years but it is old and starting to fail, plus it is a huge gas hog. Finding a car in our price range is nearly impossible and embarrassing when I go to the dealerships to see what is available. Then I worry about how it will affect our assistance. I think if we buy a car outright we will lose our medical insurance, and possibly food stamps, because we will have too much "property" and we will NEVER find anything in that price range. If we finance then we are more likely to find something but are then stuck with a payment we can't really afford. I am so tired of doing this dance.  

I recognize you from your sporadic posting Cheryl.  I'm sorry your health is failing you right now.  It's so frustrating to feel like crap all the time. Dealing with a chronic condition just saps your will to live sometimes.  I know the vehicle situation well.  My car is putting me in a similar situation and it's INCREDIBLY frustrating.  You want to get something reliable and stop putting yourself and your kids at risk everytime you get into it but you can't afford a car payment or to lose your assistance by aquiring too much property.  The limit of $2k in assets is ridiculous.  Any vehicle worth $2k or less is a rust bucket that won't last you very long or won't be very safe.

post #260 of 1405
Double check about your vehicle affecting your assets. In our state you can have your primsry vehicle worth a substancial amount, but not a secondary vehicle.

Hope all are healing well, physically and emotionally.

We got the computer this weekend but need a wireless card to get it up and running, and ink for the printer.

I'm looking for a cheap, natural way to feel a little prettier. Any ideas? I use honey on my face, and typically do a mask with it and lemon juice a couple times a week. I exfoliate with olive oil and sea salt, use coconut oil and olive oil for dry skin patches, etc. I regularly paint my toe nails and my sis cuts my hair. Maybe I'll pull out some of my makeup and actually use it, lol. Im thinking about drying to make my hair shinier. I just feel very blah lately and its getting me down.
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