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January 2013 Chit Chat

post #1 of 524
Thread Starter 

September

LunaLady- Christina: 9/19, baby boy Rhyko

 

October

TTCChloeorConner- Nicole: 10/31 baby boy Conner Dean, 8lbs2oz. 20'' long. 6:14pm

 

Early November

Seraf- Sara: 11/1, baby boy Shay born in the car, 8lb14oz

Mal85- Mallory: 11/2, baby girl Greta

EonJourney- Nicole: 11/3, identical twin boys Ember Trail 5.7 oz and Roam Freely 5.6 oz

SoCaliMommy- Kami: 11/4 baby boy Harlan Drake,  6:48pm at 10lbs even 21 1/2"

Autumnshades- Sonja: 11/7, baby boy Elijah Matthias, 6:25am, 6 lbs 10 oz, 20 inches long

MrsKatie- Katie: 11/10, baby girl Catherine Anne was born at 1:21pm.  7lbs 10oz and 21 inches long. 

 

Mid November

Jill the Pill- Jill: 11/11, baby girl Audrey Catharine 6lbs 5oz 19 inches long

TalkToMeNow- Amanda: 11/12, baby boy Jasper Conley, 12:42 pm,  8 lbs 11 oz.

Paigekitten- Katie: 11/12, baby girl Eowyn Jane, 6:09 pm, 8 lbs 3.9 oz, 21 inches

KayPea- Kirsten: 11/13, baby boy Oren Edward Adams, 5:45pm, 9lbs 11oz, 21 in long, 15in head!

wellforth - Carey: 11/15, baby boy Luca Qrzwin, 9:52 p.m., at home natural waterbirth, 7lbs9oz, 22"

LiLStar- Rachel: 11/16, baby boy Evan Curtis, 11 lbs, 15" head

Becky Wheeler- Becky: 11/19, baby boy Levi Jaxon, 10:50am, UC

jhsmama11-Amber: 11/19, baby boy Jack Henry

 

Late November

jbk21- J: 11/24, baby boy Dylan Timothy born in the caul

dashley111- Ash:  11/24, baby girl Bettie Grey, 7:03pm, 7lbs15oz, 21"

birdhappy85- Joanie:  11/24, baby girl Sora Nina, 3:39pm, 7lb 6oz, 19-1/2 in long

ZippyGirl- Anthia:  11/24, baby boy Bode McGuire born at 6:14 a.m.

glassesgirlnj - Kathy: 11/28, baby girl Annamaria Sigyn Estelle, 7lbs even, 19.75 in, 8:09pm

KaliShanti- Kali: 11/29, baby boy Enoch Noble Grandison , 8 lbs 7 oz. 21.25 in, 11:45pm

Zoopath: 11/30 baby girl Teagan 5lbs 9oz, 19 inches long

 

December

abraisme- Abra: 12/1, baby girl Coralie Katherine, 8lbs1oz, 19.75", 2pm

Jaimee: 12/3, baby boy Avery River, 6lbs14oz, 21", 4:21pm


Edited by Jaimee - 1/1/13 at 10:05am
post #2 of 524
Thread Starter 

2013-new-year.jpg

post #3 of 524
Happy new year to you all! May it be a great one!

We rang the new year in with my hubby being really sick with a nasty cold, and being bitten by a spider. Going to have to find a walk in clinic today for the bite. Eli is getting over his cold, but now his eyes are gunky. Any suggestions? I felt bad because I wiped at them with a clean warm cotton ball and his one eye was really red after (eyel Iid/around the bottom) I didn't apply much pressure either ;( I asked at the pharmacy yesterday and he said to just keep it clean. Hmm.
post #4 of 524
Hey Jaimee, I have noticed that Becky's username has changed from the front page.

Becky, I can't read your schedule from my phone, he works 10 hours every day?

Sonja, breast milk in the eye?
post #5 of 524
Reporting from old thread!

Agreed! He's getting 8.5-9.5 hours of sleep, including dozing on couch. Obviously, 8 hours is ideal, but it is not always possible. Could he try going to bed at 2:30-3 and getting up at 10? Honestly, if I were you I wouldn't even spend that time with him, though... If he got up at 10, I'd take a nap!

I know working is tough, but lots of people work 10 hour days. Maybe if you talked to him, he could make some small adjustments to help protect your health (mental and physical).


Sara, yay for Shay! I get up at 5:30-6 for work, so I don't mind Jasper getting up early. He's usually at daycare at 7:30. On the weekends, we just let him roam around the bedroom destroying things while we get a bit of extra sleep. (It's a safe space!)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraisme

Yeah, I would say that 3 hours of alone, 'unwinding' time is too much for a guy with 3 kids.. Maybe he could stretch swap that hour for an earlier time? I don't think it's fair that he expects (or wants) you to stay awake at night when he could get up a little earlier. Really, your sleep is pretty darn important. You can't be a wife or a mother if you're never sleeping!
post #6 of 524
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumnshades View Post Eli is getting over his cold, but now his eyes are gunky. Any suggestions? I felt bad because I wiped at them with a clean warm cotton ball and his one eye was really red after (eyel Iid/around the bottom) I didn't apply much pressure either ;( I asked at the pharmacy yesterday and he said to just keep it clean. Hmm.

Express a few drops of breastmilk into his eye every time you breastfeed and it should clear in a couple days.

post #7 of 524
Lol, I let my partner sleep. She is up nursing several times a night and it generally works for us. I just think bipolar disorder requires a little more self care in the sleep department. If Becky wants to be up half the night that's cool, but probably not sustainable if she doesn't sleep some other time. I also work long hours and encourage Sara to go to bed instead of waiting up for me. I can't get home and fall into bed, but I do still get up with the rest of the family.
post #8 of 524
Also, warm washcloth compresses. Jasper used to get awful eye infections frequently. He had to have abx ointment, though. Bmilk wouldn't do anything for him... I think it was just too bad. But I've heard it works for a lot of people!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaimee View Post

Express a few drops of breastmilk into his eye every time you breastfeed and it should clear in a couple days.
post #9 of 524
Thanks! I totally forgot about the breast milk thing, I now remember that is what I did when he was 6 weeks old *sigh* smile.gif brain is a little slow!
post #10 of 524
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

Reporting from old thread!
Agreed! He's getting 8.5-9.5 hours of sleep, including dozing on couch. Obviously, 8 hours is ideal, but it is not always possible. Could he try going to bed at 2:30-3 and getting up at 10? Honestly, if I were you I wouldn't even spend that time with him, though... If he got up at 10, I'd take a nap!
I know working is tough, but lots of people work 10 hour days. Maybe if you talked to him, he could make some small adjustments to help protect your health (mental and physical).
Sara, yay for Shay! I get up at 5:30-6 for work, so I don't mind Jasper getting up early. He's usually at daycare at 7:30. On the weekends, we just let him roam around the bedroom destroying things while we get a bit of extra sleep. (It's a safe space!)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraisme
Yeah, I would say that 3 hours of alone, 'unwinding' time is too much for a guy with 3 kids.. Maybe he could stretch swap that hour for an earlier time? I don't think it's fair that he expects (or wants) you to stay awake at night when he could get up a little earlier. Really, your sleep is pretty darn important. You can't be a wife or a mother if you're never sleeping!

I've tried getting him to go to bed earlier, but it seems if I'm not up "babysitting" him, he goes to bed whenever he wants. He was up until 5 this morning. He drinks every night,( hide.gif ) so I honestly think that is a major reason he's up so late and is so lethargic when he gets out of bed. So we made a deal that he's done drinking as of today. Fingers crossed, as the quitting drinking doesn't last more than a month. (I've insisted on AA in the past and he says he "doesn't have time". Can't force him to go)

post #11 of 524
That sucks, Becky. Hugs. Though I will say dh and I drink pretty much everyday and we are okay to go to bed on time and get up early. Of course, I suppose it might depend on the speed and amount?? We don't drink much.
post #12 of 524
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

That sucks, Becky. Hugs. Though I will say dh and I drink pretty much everyday and we are okay to go to bed on time and get up early. Of course, I suppose it might depend on the speed and amount?? We don't drink much.

He drinks about 4-5, 24 oz 8.5% alcohol beers a night in a 2-3 hour period. :/ I can understand a beer or 2 a night, like 12 oz cans or a bottle, but he gets tall ones and drinks more than two, often not eating before or during drinking them.

post #13 of 524
Quote:
Originally Posted by dashley111 View Post

That's tough, Becky. I'm sorry. Dealing with people with drinking problems is really complex, and it probably won't be as easy as just quitting drinking as of today. I'm sure you know, but there are many facets to addiction that need to be dealt with for the recovery and mental health of the addict. Cutting out drinking is not solving the "problem", its just how a person becomes a dry alcoholic- the drinking aspect changes, but the psychological aspect and affects of the addiction are still there.

That's a big hill to climb. I hope you guys can find a good compromise.

We've escaped addiction before and were clean for 2 years together, but it was a turbulent time as I was not being treated for my bipolar and Billy found unhealthy outlets for his addiction (gaming). This, on top of not seeing him hardly at all, led to our separation. The times he's quit drinking for about a month, he was unhappy, never smiled and it killed me because I want him to be happy, KWIM? According to him "drinking makes him happy". That was a sting too because me and the kids should make him happy, not a substance. I know there's an initial "hump" to get over when quitting using, but as someone that loves him, seeing him unhappy leads me to enabling and it makes it worse. It feels weird bringing this to the surface. I don't know how to feel about it, relieved or worried because now I have to deal with it. I think I was in denial before. I'm getting really anxious about him stopping tonight because I don't want him unhappy, yet I don't want him to start again.

post #14 of 524
Hmm. That's so tough. I know it would be really hard for you, but have you thought about seeking support from someone in your local ALANON chapter? Being an enabler is deep seeded. It took me years to learn how to handle the addicts in my life without enabling, and it definitely requires a lot of support and education. If you come from that or were raised around it, being an enabler just becomes so much a part of who you are that it's almost as impossible to change as being an addict. I hope that you remember that his addiction is feeding the chemicals in his brain, and that his unhappiness is not your fault. His success or failure is not up to you, it's up to him- and you can't make it a reflection of how you feel about yourself, even though that's really hard to do. I sure wish I could give you a hug right now!
post #15 of 524
Quote:
Originally Posted by dashley111 View Post

Hmm. That's so tough. I know it would be really hard for you, but have you thought about seeking support from someone in your local ALANON chapter? Being an enabler is deep seeded. It took me years to learn how to handle the addicts in my life without enabling, and it definitely requires a lot of support and education. If you come from that or were raised around it, being an enabler just becomes so much a part of who you are that it's almost as impossible to change as being an addict. I hope that you remember that his addiction is feeding the chemicals in his brain, and that his unhappiness is not your fault. His success or failure is not up to you, it's up to him- and you can't make it a reflection of how you feel about yourself, even though that's really hard to do. I sure wish I could give you a hug right now!

I'm thinking about going to alanon, actually. The last time he quit drinking, I had TOLD him to stop. And then he told me "I'm glad I stopped drinking. I was waiting for you to tell me I needed to stop." As if it was my responsibility for him to stop. And then a couple weeks later, he was back at it.

post #16 of 524
Aw, Becky. That's totally different. I'm sorry. Ash has some good advice. I really have none... Part of me wants to say why can't he just cut back and drink a little so he can still "be happy". But I know that shows my ignorance of addiction. And you are right, he shouldn't need alcohol to be happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Becky Wheeler View Post

He drinks about 4-5, 24 oz 8.5% alcohol beers a night in a 2-3 hour period. :/ I can understand a beer or 2 a night, like 12 oz cans or a bottle, but he gets tall ones and drinks more than two, often not eating before or during drinking them.
post #17 of 524
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

Aw, Becky. That's totally different. I'm sorry. Ash has some good advice. I really have none... Part of me wants to say why can't he just cut back and drink a little so he can still "be happy". But I know that shows my ignorance of addiction. And you are right, he shouldn't need alcohol to be happy.

Whenever he starts drinking again, it's usually justifying having one a couple times a week. Pretty soon, it's everyday. Then it's 2 everyday. Then it's full-blown 4-5 a day again. He can't drink without drinking that much. He will either drink that much or not at all. And I'm voting not at all. Puts a huge dent in our finances. Between $190-238, depending on how many he has a day. uhoh3.gif

 

I don't even remember the last time we were intimate without him having had a few beers first. I think it was in the summer.

post #18 of 524
Thread Starter 

Moving this to the January thread.  smile.gif

Quote:
Originally Posted by seraf View Post

Jaimee, I'm convinced that the gums are going to just stay stretched over the teeth until he's old enough to lose them.

 

No kidding, Sara!  What is the deal?  I'm so not looking forward to the canines and molars if this is how the incisors are treating him.  Sigh...

post #19 of 524
Those are incisors? Yikes! Shay just cut 2 canines after months of waiting. The bottom ones look like they're through but it's still gum.
post #20 of 524
Eli has super stretched gums too.. Can't wait for them to poke through. Dealing with a cold and teething has been hard on Eli. My dh is home with a nasty cold too. I am caring for two babies lol smile.gif
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