January 2013 Chit Chat - Page 23 « Back to Group Discussions

[Mal85]

Hitting, smacking, and all of that going on here too. And Greta is a VERY persistent child! Here is our typical sequence of events... I ask her politely, then ask her sternly, then give a stern no-no or we don't hit mommy, then I put her down or walk away from her. It always ends in tears for her and it always takes me walking away from her before she'll stop.

I will take the hitting though. DD1 was a biter and bit my daycare kids every chance she got. It was awful and embarrassing. She bit badly for probably a year and a half, then it gradually tapered off. She was probably about this age when it started.

[Mal85]

Originally Posted by dashley111 


B is a screamer.  She has almost no words still and just screams to communicate that she needs something.  It pierces my brain, I swear.  I say "use your words, you want ______" 3,000 times a day even though she has no words- just to remind her that she needs to find another way to communicate.

Oh. My. God. What is it with the screaming?! Greta also screams all the time. I really think she is going to damage my hearing she is so loud!

[KayPea]

We've got three young toddlers, and they each have their own form of aggression. Oren's the biter, Chloe's the hitter (or blugeoner? She likes to use heavy hard objects to beat the others with) and Claire is the clawer, they one who most often draws blood. Claire whines and cries, Chloe complains and growls and Oren bellows and screams. They all throw themselves face first on the floor in despair. It is so freaking loud here, and we are constantly breaking up squabbles. Oy. They are all pretty distractable, thank goodness, that's our main tool, along with plenty of gentles and kisses and high fives etc.

[Autumnshades]

Kirsten, that sounds crazy!  I can barely stand Eli's whining/screaming... I can't imagine 3 times the noise/craziness!  Eli is very insistent on having things just his way - they have to be just right or he is upset.  He is super sweet most of the time, loves playing and having elaborate conversations with full facial expressions and lots of eye contact. 

I have had a never-ending migraine today.  Nothing has helped and Eli is teething so he has been crying a lot :(  *sigh*  He seems to have calmed down sufficiently after I gave him some pain and fever meds.  He is now quietly playing with his toys.

[KayPea]

They are all super-adorable though, and SO funny. We laugh all day long. They do this thing at dinner time which we call Shake That Mullet where they all go crazy dancing and singing in their high chairs, each with their own special groove. Up until recently they have all been so good at independent and side-by-side play, but we're moving out of that now and they are becoming a bit more high-maintenance. But my last post painted them in a bad light - they are really such silly and sweet little people. Some days/times it CAN be overwhelming, but it's often just lots of fun.

[seraf]

My oldest's hitting phase lased 1 hit. My second was pretty short lived, too. I'm going to hope for a genetic component.

[Becky Wheeler]

Ugh! Billy officially taught levi last night that it's FUNNY to hit.  Yeah. Tried saying "owie!" and he laughed and did it again. Apparently, the "owie" is part of their hitting game as well.

[TalkToMeNow]

We have a gentle hitting game. Probably a bad idea. Jasper lightly pushes my face, and I snap my head back and yell "boom!". He loves it. He's not much of a hitter and has yet to bite. He will push us away sometimes and occasionally throws a toy. He has a very mild temperament, so he is rarely angry at us. The only thing that really upsets him is being kept out of places he wants to be. Meaning closing the refrigerator, dishwasher, or pantry, or not letting him leave the bedroom on his own to go down the stairs. I try to give him a little fridge, dishwasher, and pantry time, but he always goes for the beer and the knives. Sigh. Anyway,  these are the things that cause tantrums. For Jasper, that means screeching, feet stomping, then giving up on life, sinking to the floor, and sobbing. He will allow us to pick him up and comfort him. After dd1, all other kids just seem funny. So I usually just laugh. Same with poor dd2- when she tries to be bad, I just laugh. Must stop laughing! Kids hate that! But I have infinite patience thanks to dd1. Well, not with her so much...

Screaming- Jasper does it. Typically only when he wants to be held or nursed and we aren't doing it. He has no words. Not a talker.  I am trying super hard to teach him signs now because I don't think talking is going to happen soon. He knows more, all done, and milk. But sometimes he just uses all three in a row. It's a work in progress. Typically, I know what he wants, but I'd really like him to be able to express himself better.

Good advice given on hitting and biting. Not much you can do. Keep teaching gentle. Dd1 use to chase me around trying to bite. And she wouldn't give up for a long time. I'd have to hold her head back, but she'd still be coming at me, teeth barred. She bit for a long time. Just family, no other kids. Then dd2 would try to bite her.

I think the teenage years are very similar to the toddler years. I read that teen brains are flooded with dopamine, so they feel everything-good and bad-very strongly. So true. Oh the drama with dsd. The drama!! "Dsd, I see you failed your Spanish quiz last week. What happened?" Dsd- Sobs!! "You guys don't understand!!!" ??? We took her cell phone away a while back for something she did, and I swear she cried for three days. And wouldn't talk to us.

Btw, Jasper is all better! Rash is almost gone, and he is back at daycare. Yay! 

[dashley111]

You mean...the teenage years are just like my 6 year old is now?!    I just assumed it got better at some point. I spaced my kids out.  I'm going to have 10 solid years of puberty in my house.  Bad choice.

About communication-  the frustrating part for me, is that I know B *can* say words.  She has said Grandma, Banana, Kitty, ears, eyes, all of our names.  But only when she wants.  She mostly just wants to scream.  I'm like, seriously kid if you can say Grandma you can say up.

[TalkToMeNow]

Ha! Jasper does the same thing. He has clearly said achoo (copying a sneeze), Elsa (dd2's name), mama, daddy, hi, this, that, more, and yes. He has "Hi Dada" or Daddy. But only 1-2 times each. Then he is done apparently. He is making no move to keep it up. So signing it is, I guess. 

[seraf]

Shay's language has been one step forward, two steps back. He had more words at his birthday than he does now. We are doing a lot of signing. Just 3 signs that he uses for everything. 4 words. It's amazing how many ideas he can get across with 4 words.

[Becky Wheeler]

Originally Posted by seraf 

Shay's language has been one step forward, two steps back. He had more words at his birthday than he does now. We are doing a lot of signing. Just 3 signs that he uses for everything. 4 words. It's amazing how many ideas he can get across with 4 words.

That's actually pretty cool. I wish I had the kind of self-control to have taught Levi some signing. lol 

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by Becky Wheeler 

That's actually pretty cool. I wish I had the kind of self-control to have taught Levi some signing. lol 

It's not too late!  In fact, it will be quicker to teach him now.  Just show him when you're doing things like "book" and "eat" and "nurse"... it's easy.

[ZippyGirl]

We are teaching new signs, and it is very easy at this age.  He just learned "book", which is super helpful, since his horrible whining noise rears its ugly head when he wants a book.

With DD, we didn't have hitting, biting, screaming, or tantrums.  Our big issues was sharing (when she was just a little older than our babies).  Oh man, I am dreading dealing with that again (let's hope not!).  Anyway, it's always something, isn't it?!?

[ZippyGirl]

Off topic, but is there a way to get the Mothering discussion board from asking if I want to post my comments on this thread to my facebook wall?

[seraf]

It asks you that? I've never seen such a thing.

Becky, I'm working on please/help because the whining makes me crazy.

[CDsMom1031]

Quick off topic question... If you only have one ovary, do you still have a period every month? And one is just anovulatory?

[dashley111]

It would not necessarily affect your period, depends on how the other ovary makes up for the hormones.  Your ovaries do not always "take turns" either, sometimes you can ovulate from one side multiple months in a row.  So really, it means nothing.  Haha.  A person with one ovary still likely has a period every month, and likely ovulates most months also.

[dashley111]

Had to fact check myself, lol.

"It is also important for many women to learn that one ovary is sufficient for the production of hormones. In women who must have one ovary removed, they will experience no changes in their menstrual cycle. Women with one ovary continue to ovulate monthly and can conceive a child. Women who undergo a hysterectomy and retain one ovary will also not enter menopause, just as if they still had both ovaries."

[CDsMom1031]

Awesome. Thanks. I have a friend who is getting her right one removed next week due to a tumor. She was worried because she has to go through AI anyways and was worried it'd affect her fertility.