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Taking The Scenic Route to a BFP - Winter/Spring 2013 Edition - Page 52

post #1021 of 1519
Thinking of you sherry hug2.gif
post #1022 of 1519
Sherry - thinking of you. If it doesn't stick at least happened and could happen again, right?
post #1023 of 1519
Just wanted to tell you I'm reading along. Work is crazy busy & I'm barely sleeping at night. <3 to all. I'll try & check in tomorrow.
post #1024 of 1519

Sherry- keep us posted OK? And I hope you have a nice time in Vegas, whatever happens...


AFM, I am getting to that point late in the 2ww when I start to lose it. SKJ talked me down a bit over email yesterday and helped me decide to go in for a blood test on Friday, since a pee-test wouldn't be reliable until later in the weekend and I'll be out of town. Starting to go a little nuts with the symptom spotting. I have nausea and tender boobs and another thermal shift this morning, BUT I had all those last cycle too and it was a bust.


I will be pretty devastated if this month isn't it either. I'm beginning to have de ja vu, bringing back all the painful memories of 18 months ago when I first suspected I had a problem trying to conceive, and the sinking sense of doom and fear that mounted worse and worse with each AF... I seriously cannot go through that again.

post #1025 of 1519
Daurelia - I hope you don't have to go through another month of that sinking feeling. Fingers crossed that your symptoms are the real deal this time.

TF - Hope you get some sleep soon. Thinking of you lots.

AFM - Had my appointment this morning. The little bean measured 7w1d. I'm 7w2d by my estimation, so everything seems to be right on track. The heart rate was 136. My hcg was 70,500. I'm to the point where it's no longer doubling. It was just over 37k last Wednesday. The nurse said it will start to go down soon and that it looked normal. My estrogen was in the 300's and my P4 was 20. I was a little worried b/c it had gone down the last two weeks from 23 - 21 - 20. She immediately said it's nothing to worry about and has a lot to do with when I took the prometrium. Since I've been getting in bed at 8 o'clock, it's been earlier than in the prior weeks. So, all in all, I've officially made it past my furthest m/c.

I'm wearing sea-bands to help with the nausea and they seem to be helping. Today I feel ok. Not too terrible. I'm starting to actually believe that this could work and that's scary.
post #1026 of 1519
Here's the little guy/gal
post #1027 of 1519
Thread Starter 

SKJ - I've been searching for my sea bands for days and can't seem to remember where I put them. I started crying about it this morning...I'm so happy you've made it this far! I'm starting to think this might work out too and it's super scary...


TF - I hope the busyness calms down soon! We miss you!


Daurelia - I'm sorry. I'm not sure what to say to be encouraging at the moment. I think a blood test is a good idea.


Sherry - Thinking of you!


Indie - If you're reading along while on vacation. You were in one of my crazy dreams last night. For some reason I was at Wendy's and they had some kind of "celebrity menu" going on where celebrities has made up these crazy meals. They were all in a display case and I saw your picture by one. I was so made at you that you were eating that crap!

post #1028 of 1519
SKJ - that u/s is looking great 😄 and I gave to Au congrats on making it further than ever before... Although I agree that this one is a healthy sticky one - you now know your protocol is right for you!
Sila - hugs on the pg emotions, it's so cute that no matter the pg experience it hits us all the same...
Peace, and patience to everyone else.. Lol I'm trying hard to stay zen...
post #1029 of 1519

Looking good SKJ! Glad you are still getting good reports! If the doc says don't worry about the P4 I wouldn't worry... but I don't know much in the way of progesterone.


Sila- Share as much as you are comfortable with, we are here for eachother in the good & bad! Your dream made me laugh because jpack and I met at Wendy's last Friday... in our defense we only ate Frosty's... is that even a good defense? They were delicious anyway and totally called for given the circumstances.


Regarding seabands- They did not help me at all, they made my joints and my tendons hurt all the way up my hands. I never had too strong nausea though... 


chuord- Glad you're staying Zen!


jpack- clomid is like your own personal glance at hell. Are you doing 100 again, I cant remember. I'm so lucky to have you nearby!


sherry- :( everything is just so hard and unexplained.... 


dauralia- The way you described that feeling hit so close to home. Every new thing the doctors want to try brings SO much hope, and the longer you try something new the quicker that sinking abyss comes. It describes my journey exactly. We've reached the point of 'if this doesn't work we are really out of options'. It is so scary. I hope that the test on Friday is a huge positive for HCG so none of this matters.


AFM- AF is basically here, slightly crampy but not real flow yet. Follow-up with RE tomorrow along with acupuncture and my ayurveda treatment. Work has been hard but having her announce made things less anxious. At least I'm not waiting for the punch in the gut anymore. In a way I think my anxiety comes from losing my support system. I don't want to talk about my struggles anymore because everyone is focused on her joy and it makes me feel like a poor sport. So really I've just kept to myself. It has been easy because work has been SO busy but I feel so lonely. I haven't heard from my sister either. Nothing exciting here anyway.

post #1030 of 1519
Tf you really are a good sport! I'm glad AF is almost here so that the next beginning can start... Also that work is so busy... I still think that people at work will be happy for you to talk to them when you want to... People don't just stop caring - real ones anyway... Hugs about the whole thing - especially re your sister, I hope she makes peace with you, as you don't need family belittling you.
post #1031 of 1519
Thread Starter 

6 weeks today...

post #1032 of 1519
Daurelia hang in there.

Yay Sila!

Hi baby SKJ!

Hugs, Tf. Hope af gets going soon.

Chourd keep staying zen.
post #1033 of 1519
I had my blood drawn today and my hcg was still 2.98. Now I have to get rechecked next Tuesday and if it isn't down to zero we get delayed a month. Just another stressor...
post #1034 of 1519
Thread Starter 

TF - I thought anything 4 and under was negative? Some people always have it present in their system at a low level. 

post #1035 of 1519
Oh. Tf sorry....isn't there a cleansing tea....i think i have had people mention it...i think you have to drink 30 gallons or so

Full on ugly af...but at least i am sitting in the sun
post #1036 of 1519

TF - That sucks. I'm sorry you are going through this. The clinic here says anything 5 and under is a negative.


hug2.gifSherry. Enjoy your sunshine!

post #1037 of 1519
Here it has to be under 1. I have faith it will go down by next week.
I'm tired & nauseas today, last night I had hot flashes. AF has been uneventful otherwise. Cramps are nowhere near where they were before, I credit that the the proathanols & wobenzym (and maybe pregnancy?). It also was very red & thin which my acupuncturist said is fantastic. I'm keeping with my supplements & RRL tea up until transfer.
I'm so sick of feeling bad for myself. My head knows all the blah blah about my time, my journey, we will get there, etc but my heart still sinks & I get anxious around my coworker. It's so strange I can't talk myself out of it. Luckily it decreases as the day goes on. I felt fine by 830 this morning but I wish it didn't happen at all. I think as time goes on & we figure out how to act toward each other I will feel better. The weather is getting nicer around here so that helps too, just to be able to get out & breathe fresh air.
DH & I are in the great debate as to put back 1 or 2. We has decided on 2 but as jpack has mentioned our doc is hugely anti multiples & after hearing his point it is hard to decide. He is right about the risks during pregnancy & the medical long term risks to the babies. Sigh... Nothing's easy.
post #1038 of 1519
Thread Starter 

Sherry - I'm so sorry.


TF - I would put back one and go for the home birth. The risks of twin pregnancies are just so much higher. Higher for mommy, higher for babies. There are also many potential long term risks to health, potential long and expensive NICU stays, longer recovery depending the way your delivery goes, so much. But then there are twin pregnancies that experience none of those. I understand after everything you've been through wanting to put back two. Many times when you put back 2 they don't both make it. Doesn't it also still depend on whether or not they both make the thaw? I'm so sorry you are faced with these kind of difficult decisions. Nothing on this journey is easy. Maybe AF will clear out the rest of the hcg? Do something you love just for you. Take care of yourself :)


How is the bead buying and mailing going guys?


AFM - So sick....


I called the midwife on Tues and left a message. She hasn't gotten back to me yet. I'm sure she's busy delivering babies and stuff...

post #1039 of 1519
TF- I'm so sorry for all you've been through lately. It's just so much to handle. Glad that AF seems better though. That is a really tough call on how many to put back. A lot of what Sila said makes sense. I hate that there are so many impossible decisions that IFers have to face that others don't. Just so unfair.

Sila - Glad you are feeling so sick! (you know what I mean).

AFM - I was feeling terrible yesterday. I finally was feeling a bit better last night and have been since. I'm not even needing my sea bands today. I'm exhausted and my boobs are hurting more, but my nausea seems to have gone away. It makes me very nervous. I hated how I felt yesterday, but it was so reassuring. I just want to feel sick again greensad.gif
post #1040 of 1519
Back to sick smile.gif
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